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            Another week of glory made and perhaps glory lost. Many left their blood, sweat and tears on the field(s). Scratch that, mostly sweat…LOTS and lots of sweat. Is it just me or was the temperature difference between week 1 and week 2 as bipolar as our new friends in D6 known as Bipolar Express? For a new team still trying to find their MOJO they looked okay but unfortunately could not out score an AJ Forster led CSR team. Weird, I know. But luckily for the ladies of B.E. it appeared Gronk, during the height of the #MeToo movement, decided it was safest to keep his hands to himself and we should all thank sweet 8lb 6oz newborn baby Jesus for that. And if anyone is looking for something else to be thankful for come November 22, 2018 we’ve got you covered. First, we will not require security at the next B.E. matchup as Gordon kept his cool and expressed his frustrations in a healthy way and quickly changed out of his happy face t-shirt and into his angry face t-shirt before 2 minutes of game time had even been expended. Second, someone convinced management that it’s a better idea to spin the Topper Wheel of Hope at 3pm instead of at 2pm so if you don’t know, now you know.  Third, the legendary Daryll of Cobblestone was present to win this past week’s $100 gift certificate and laughed all the way to the bank bar right in former team mate Garret’s face. Poor Garrett. Finally, a shorthanded TEIM had no choice but to utilize their QB Alex on defense and ended up with a far different outcome than last week’s matchup against Eyes Downtown which further begs the question, has Dave Baker been suffering nightmares ever since because Alex is better on D than say…others. We wont name, names.

            Now that we’ve given proper thanks we must talk about the stranger things that happened Saturday. I know everyone must be wondering, what the h-e-double hockey sticks is going on with Angry Buffalo? Word on the streets is people are not only being picked off and kicked off but walking off. Did we learn nothing from the rise and fall of the Tommy Hughes Experience? This must be contained, and fast, if they wish to once again be the team we know and love. Seriously, check the waiver wire for both Mo Saleh and Dave Wilbern, draft them, and immediately form a secret alliance and tell Mo that Dave Wilbern is better than him and vice versa so the two will subconsciously go no holds barred on the field hoping to come out on top all whilst helping a struggling Angry Buffalo. I believe that’s what we call turning one’s weakness into one’s strength. Another walking disaster that was turning heads Saturday was the fall of Joey Batt’s who went 0-2 for the day. Has anyone checked on Burr? I hear he had an epic meltdown after being beat by Topper. There is only one explanation for this and that is that Uncle Topper must have taken a personal day and didn’t show up to the fields. Although, another explanation I hear might be hemorrhoids because apparently Joey has been suffering in silence since the spring season. Are you thinking what I’m thinking? If you’re thinking, we need to start another GoFundMe page, this time for a lifetime supply of Preparation H and MiraLAX for our first ever potential back to back TSL MVP, then you are correct! We’re here for you Joey and we’re sorry you’re so constipated. In conclusion we need to talk about the strange superstition that is “bad luck comes in threes”. Apparently, not one, not two, but three people have broken a pinky so badly they require surgery. If this superstition is in fact true, then the rest of us godforsaken people are safe, but I’d still like to invite you all to join me in a moment of silence in remembrance of all those pinkies we’ve lost this season.                   , Amen. As always, keep it up TSL and may the odds be ever in your favor on your race to football immortality and don’t forget, I’ll be watching.

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