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That was a crazy finish to the regular season. The weather sucked but the action both on and off the field was epic. The icing on the cake was Mark from UFO trotting up to the Topper’s Wheel of Hope and hitting “shots for everyone” which had the crowd going crazy. Yes it is going in the Spring rule book that Mark from UFO is also no longer allowed to ever spin or get within 100 ft of the Wheel of Hope ever again. Can an inanimate object get a restraining order out against a person? Hmmm Ill have to look into this and get back to everyone.

Ok let’s get down to business shall we…

-My game ended at around 11ish (it had to be like 20 minutes late after the first argument, then the 2^nd argument, then the 3rd argument then Bobby calling every PE player a scumb bag, then Bobby trying to fight Boccio, then Bobby trying to fight Hughes, player Hughes not ref Hughes, that argument with ref Hughes happened later in the game, actually my bad he fought ref Hughes after he thought he missed the first call then fought with ref Hughes later in the game on the no suspension Boccio call, yelling at the refs , then Bobby yelling at anyone that would listen and as you know acting like a child and swearing at the world takes time so it might have been like 11:20) and a few times I peaked over to Field #2 and kept seeing Drew sitting in the mud looking up into the sky and for some weird reason a girl from  SITE  was running right by him. Boo Drew had a tough day at the office. One must now wonder if Team Topper tells Drew next week’s game is at 11:00 or 12:00. Don’t tell Drew but the game really is at 10 am.

- D5 was everything we thought it could be. With the season on the line for up to (6) teams it ended like this. (3) teams ended 3-5 and (2) teams ended 3-6. When the dust settled Vandalay Industries and Come from Behind were on the outside looking in. It was nice to see Paul back but he unfortunately brought the dreaded interception bug with him in (2) tough losses. The Topper once again struggled in the weather for VI. A lil birdie did in fact tell me that VI did have to forfeit due to player issues but did play the game and totally “destroyed ACE” but the official victory went to ACE.

-Shout out to TSL super subs Emily Schilling and Val Testa who helped Hung Buffalo shock Matty’s Angles in a 28-28 tie. Keep your eyes on Katie Salisbury as girl has only been back a week or so but she looks to be in mid season form as girl is scary good. This game was really weird as HB was one of the only teams I have ever seen truly use their “size” to just throw the ball “up” on the shorter MA safeties. It looked like the strategy worked.

- It’s like every time I tried to find Joe K he was gone. Though a part of me just thinks he ran away when 3^rd and Schlong came into the bar. The good news is Gordon just walked over to the 3AS game later in the day and heckled the whole team. Joe K might be trying to get out of 3AS but Gordon will be having none of it as I am sure he will play 3AS by himself if he has to. BTW kudos to Gordon on helping propel BiPolar Express to their first ever victory 37-35 over Tight End Zones.

-Speaking of 3^rd and Schlong not only are they continuing to call out Bullet Club but they unveiled their new baseball hats this week. 3AS is now 5-3 and are in the #3 spot heading into  the playoffs. They also are winners of their last (4) and are entering the playoffs wicked hot right now.

-Oh snap Joey Batts is MIA and Tony tagged in and helped the Gryff throw 35 on DMX. Burr had (4) TDS and 3 pics in this game. “Glasses” fresh off of “vetoing” his trade to Cintas came up large in the big win. Gryffindor could be a team to keep your eyes on down the stretch. With Joey Batts trying to achieve history as our first ever back to back league MPV I assume he will squash any “Tony should be QB” rumors circulating during his absence.

- Buffalo Solar Solutions played Ultimate Warriors to a big 30-30 tie now these 2 hook up again this week to settle the score once and for all. I expect this to be one of the better first round games of the week between 2 very evenly matched teams.

-SITE lost to Team Topper 30-20 but a few of their players found me and had a few choice words for the officiating in that game. I found this very interesting as to me this team has finally turned the corner and is almost ready to make some noise in this league. They have been terrible the past few seasons but I finally feel like they think they can compete and win in this league. It all begins and ends at QB in this league.

- I wouldn’t have believed it unless I saw it. Jabronies once again won the Topper Wheel of Hope Spin and once again went to wheel #2 where this time they hit “uber drive drunk Bernal’s home after football.” Jabronies are like literally the only team all year that has hit a punishment on the wheel. Thank God they are great sports. BTW kudos to them on a big 16-10 victory over Practice Squad.

-If I was Bullet Club I would not be feeling so warm and fuzzy heading into the D3 dance. They barely survived Sticky Bandits this week 33-31, they obviously are still ducking 3^rd and Schlong and now they must once again have at it with DMX a team that beat them up pretty good a few weeks ago. DMX/Bullet Club is another solid 4/5 matchup heading our way.

-I feel for TEIM. Losing Tiger and Kyle Coniff hurts and the cavalry didn’t exactly come and give them much hope heading into the playoffs. They must once again face rival Hootie and the Brofish this time without their (2) stars. I think TEIM will need to play their best game ever to take this one.

- I’m still trying to figure out how ACE was left for dead but somehow is walking into the playoffs as the #5 seed. They also are facing a Hung Buffalo team they beat this session 22-18. Things could not have lined up more nicely for Ronny K than they did. I keep looking at D5 and keep saying please let all the favorites win so we can guarantee Matty’s Angels vs Cunning Stunts in at least Round #2. 

- I remember talking to a Witter’s player who was aggravated at an early season loss to Matty’s Angels who told me if he gets another chance they are going to beat them. Well looks like Witter’s gets another crack at the Angels as they go at it this week. I am curious to see what Witter’s tries to do to stop Katie Salisbury.

- HMMM….Sticky Bandits was 1-3 then after Card Board Cut Out Dave Bakers arrived went 1-1-1- and played Bullet Club tough in a 2 point loss. Now the Sticky Nation must head into the slop next week against the worst bad weather QB in the business. Yes Topper usually owns Sticky but Topper hates the cold and mucky weather. This game should be interesting.

- I was confident that the leadership on UFO would right the ship and get things back on track. Well after Mark had his “issue” I am proud to report UFO is in the D5 dance. UFO has won 2 out of their last 3 and played the Stunts very tough in a 3 point loss.

-Is there a QB controversy looming on Matty’s Angels as Coach Jay dropped 54 on CFB in a big 54-28 victory? MA heads to the playoffs gunning for Quinn and the D5 title.

-I thought I had seen it all but then yesterday happened. Well Eyes Downtown and Public Enemy played in a game won by Public Enemy 41-37. I was very surprised in this game. The last few games ED has beaten PE as their QB has made the plays when it matters most and the PE QB has “blinked first.” This game the ED QB panicked and he “blinked first.” The PE QB was not stopped all day on offense. The game was good but a few times in the game a few questionable plays happened. I am still not convinced that PE players tried in any way shape or form to hurt ED players yet the ED QB continues to yell and scream that this was not the case. I would tell the ED QB to go find a dictionary and go look up the word delusional and tell me what it means. I so hope these 2 don’t meet again in the playoffs.

-What the heck happened to Practice Squad? They were like D6 playoff runners up now they are 3-5 and in the #7 hole heading into the playoffs. I really thought this team was ready to turn the corner.

-The McKenzie Agency is 5-3 and they are in a very easy matchup with Tight End Zones this week but for them to make some noise in round #2 they must get more from their offense. 23 points a game on offense will not be enough to carry against Peachy Platoon or Celino Sewer Rats. Its crappy out, its muddy out, its rainy out, it’s time to unleash the Webber!!!!

-If you asked me to pick an upset in each division I’d say: D1: HATBF over TEIM. D3: Sticky Bandits over Team Topper if Drew plays. If Drew doesn’t play Bullet Club over DMX. D4: Cintas over 3^rd and Schlong. D5: Hope N Ruin over Cunning Stunts. D6: Passless Chaps over Jabronies

-I would ask all TSLers to get your sub requests in early just in case your request is rejected. We will not allow teams to stack their rosters for playoffs with subs. Please email This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.. I would also ask captains to read their emails as a “do not sub” list will be going out on a few women who will be not allowed to sub in the playoffs. Please know this list is designed to prevent teams from stacking their rosters with subs better than their normal players.

-I need to be honest I don’t see a lot of All we do is Quinn. I assume the team I was watching this week was playing short because as I watched their game this week and said to myself “this is not the best team in D5.”

-It’s looking to me like Puckett All Stars are heading to the D4 title game. HK7 looks like they have an offense that can go with them. I’m not sure 3AS can win in a shootout with HK7 but I think it still would be an awesome battle. Time will tell.

-I hope Tune Squad comes back and goes down a division or two. I see skill on their team they just need more time and experience learning this game.

-Morning Wood had to be licking their chops this time last session as they were heading to round #1 against the Topper. They can’t be as happy this time as they draw A&A. I am not seeing a MW win next week against a very quick A&A team. I fear the A&A girls will be putting on a show next week. BTW does anyone know if the MW QB is still alive?

-For some reason I keep looking at the Hope n Ruin vs Cunning Stunts game and feel an upset could be looming. HNR beat the Stunts once can they do it again and be back to back D5 champions?

- I would like to take this time to congratulate Jessica on Bullet Club for actually talking to me for more than 3 minutes. Yes I asked her if she was dying. I don’t think she is.

- I am not the predictions guy that is more a thing the GF does but if I had to handicap Morning Wood’s odds on taking home the D3 title I would right now put them at 63-1. If anyone on their team reads this article I will change those odds to 39.5 -1.

- On behalf of the TSL Universe kudos go out to Topper on purchasing the grey TSL hats, the (3) stripe grey accented hats, the mid tone grey hats and the female dark grey top light grey bottom hats. I did not know there were that many shades of grey until Saturday and I am a painting contractor.

-Ladies and gentlemen of the TSL Universe it is now time to do a public service announcement. Audi’s are nice vehicles even though Diana Bernard doesn’t think so. When carrying football gear, equipment and more importantly Travis’ stupid speaker please remember to bring the proper seat and floor protection to protect the Audi at all times. It has been brought to my attention from “anonymous sources” that Travis’ stupid speaker went into Bocc’s Audi without the proper floor and seat protection and a mark was made in the interior. Travis you should feel shame for this travesty of justice. For shame! I’m sorry Audi get well soon.

That’s enough for this week. As I will continue to say if you keep giving me something to write about I will keep writing.

See you next week…..I think

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