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Welcome back to the TSL Quarterback Power Rankings!  
 
How do you feel about your team two weeks into the season?  Are you one of the 15 teams that are still undefeated?  Maybe you're one of the 14 teams that haven't won a game yet?  Or maybe you're No Punt Intended and your team hasn't even played a game?  Either way: it's EARLY, and we preach the same thing at around this point every session: don't get too excited if you're winning and don't get too panicked if you're losing.  You're not as good as your undefeated record, and you're (probably) not as bad as your winless record.  All things even out in time, so try not to freak out and scream at your quarterback just because he missed a critical play last weekend.  He (or she!) will learn and do better next time.
 
Given the light volume of games the first week, we're still only showing a Top Ten in our Power Rankings below.  We know, we know.  We need to expand it next week to include more players, and we will.  But this is what you get for now:
 
 
#1 Joey Batts - Legends / Cunning Stunts
Last Week:  Beat Freeballers 51-28 (Legends)
Imagine moving up from D3 to D2, and your first game in your new division is... a crossover game against the defending D1 champs.  That's some rotten luck right there for Freeballers.  Joey Batts and his over-powered teammates continue to roll, destroying all in their path.  It's been years since we've had an undefeated team in any division though, so these guys have to lose eventually, we think.
 
#2 Mike Thomas - Sticky Bandits
Last Week:  Beat Scared Hitless 29-22, beat Grey Hair - Don't Care 48-32
The Sticky Bandits don't blow their opponents away, but they seem to have a knack for consistently winning the close ones.  Mike Thomas starts the season 2-0 as Sticky Nation has their eyes set squarely on a rematch with Legends in this year's D1 Finals.  
 
#3 Bobby McConnell - Eyes Downtown
Last Week:  Lost to Tight Ends in Motion 31-26
Eyes Downtown dropped a close one on the last play of the game to the new and improved (or old and improved?) Tight Ends in Motion.  Bobby is still gelling with some new receivers this session and we imagine he won't be held to less than 30 points too often.  We have him ranked above Bro for at least one more week based on the body of work Bobby put together this Spring (that we assume will carry over).
 
#4 David "Bro" Kleckler - Tight Ends in Motion
Last Week:  Beat Passed Our Prime 38-7, beat Eyes Downtown 31-26
The former D1 champion QB is back for Tight Ends in Motion, and the results are exactly what his squad hoped for.  Tight Ends have already matched their win total from last season in one day, and they're ready to put the disastrous Spring 2022 season behind them.  How many D1 championship games in a row did they make when Bro was QB?  Three?  Kleckler looks to start a new streak this season.
 
#5 Garrett Beesing - Frodo Swaggins
Last Week:  Beat DILFS 49-32
We knew they'd put up some points with their new receivers but 114 in two games?  That's as many as Grey Hair - Don't Care... in half the number of games.  Garrett has to be feeling good about the roster he's assembled right now, especially after taking down one of their strongest potential threats in the DILFS.  Any conversation about the favorites in D2 has to start with Frodo Swaggins.
 
#6 Jeremy "Hogan" Olson - Passed Our Prime
Last Week:  Beat Grey Hair - Don't Care 36-32, lost to Tight Ends in Motion 38-7
Passed Our Prime got the snot kicked out of them in their first ever D1 game, then rebounded to win their first ever D1 game an hour later.  We think Hogan has to be happy with a 1-1 record in his first weekend in Western New York's strongest division.  Passed Our Prime's Achilles heel has always been their attendance; if their people show up all session, we think they'll surprise some people.
 
#7 Brandt Dubey - DILFS
Last Week:  Lost to Frodo Swaggins 49-32
DILFS really got both ends of the D2 spectrum quickly this session, facing the "are they going to be okay?" Replacements in Week 1 and then the "I think they'd be okay in D1" Frodo Swaggins the next week.  The result was the 1-1 record we would have predicted.  17 points isn't a huge loss, and Dubey and company might be just a couple adjustments away from taking the rematch next time they play Frodo.
 
#8 Jeremy Burr - Untouchaballs
Last Week:  Beat Buffalo Vice Retro 37-19
Untouchaballs surprised exactly no one by starting strong in their new division with a win over Buffalo Vice Retro.  They were the heavy favorites when they beat Frodo Swaggins in the D3 Finals a couple months ago... will the roles be reversed if they meet in the D2 Finals this session? We're getting ahead of ourselves of course, but Burr's mobility and chemistry with his receivers is strong enough that we're already viewing these guys as top contenders in their new division.
 
#9 Dylan Day - Scared Hitless
Last Week:  Lost to Sticky Bandits 29-22
Scared Hitless may be 0-2 but they've only lost their first two games in D1 by a combined 17 points.  They were a score away from potentially beating last season's second best D1 team this week, and they lost by only ten (or "one score" when you have Melanie and Jamie) to Grey Hair the week before.  They're competitive, and they were the only team to actually defeat a D1 squad in a Crossover game last session... Dylan is just waiting on his first "true" D1 win.
 
#10 Dave Eickhoff - Grey Hair - Don't Care
Last Week:  Lost to Sticky Bandits 48-32, lost to Passed Our Prime 36-32
Grey Hair - Don't Care was missing a few of their top players this past week and it showed, as they dropped two to fall to 1-3 on the young season.  Eickhoff was probably hoping to be at least 2-2 right now but at least they've got the "win a D1 game" monkey off their back already.  Now they just need an upset over one of the "top" teams to really announce their arrival.
 
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This was a short article, huh?  Look, you know how we operate at the TSL Power Rankings.   We thrive on graphs and analytics and it's just too early in the season to give you any of those.  They would be pointless and misleading... although it would be fun to show Travis Henry's Kids averaging only 19 PPG.  
 
This article will get longer and more colorful as the season goes on, so stay tuned and we promise we'll cover more QBs and more charts than ever.
 
Here's a reminder of our schedule for what we plan to rank this season OTHER than just our usual QB Rankings.  If you have feedback ahead of these articles and you want to weigh in, you can always email us at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..  If you email us AFTER the fact to complain about how much you hated them, we'll just tell you that you should have let us know sooner!
 
  • September 15: Best Female Players in the League
  • September 22: Best at Bar (Individuals, Not Teams)
  • September 29: Best Male Players (Non-QB) in the League
  • October 6: Division All-Star Teams Announced
 
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That's it for this week!  As always, if you have any thoughts on why you hate this article (your team’s QB should be ranked higher?  you want a Worst QBs in the League ranking so you can read about Topper's Breakfast Club performances?  you threw a TD as a backup QB in the closing seconds of a blowout loss and somehow you think we should be talking about that?) please send an email to This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..    Seriously, we can do this BETTER if you TELL us about your team!
 
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