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Category: TSL QB Power Rankings
Created: Thursday, 13 October 2022 16:39
Published: Thursday, 13 October 2022 16:39
Written by Jeff Krol
Hits: 165


Welcome back to the FINAL TSL Quarterback Power Rankings of the season!  
Yes, unlike our way more productive colleagues the Godfather and the Sentinel, we don't write articles during the playoffs.  We like to sit back and just watch the show, the fireworks, the bloodbath, whatever you want to call it, without having to analyze anything.  So with this being our last article of the year, we've saved a lot for you.  We have our final Top 25 Quarterbacks of the year (no, Topper didn't make the final cut), some updated charts and graphs that you've seen before (if not this session, then other sessions), and then our usual playoff division analysis where we look at each playoff race in detail to pick out any trends in the data we can find.  
This will be our longest article of the year, so buckle up!  (Or just quit reading right now if you're too intimidated, that's fine too.)
#1 Joey Batts - Legends / Cunning Stunts
Last Week:  Beat Eyes Downtown 33-20 (Legends), lost to Travis Henry's Kids 56-40 (Stunts)
For the second season in a row, Joey vaults into the #1 spot on the last day of the season.  Disgusting.  Believe us, we don't like it any more than you do.  Ironically it comes after the Stunts finally lost their first game of the season too.  But tough to argue with the total resumé here: #1 seed in D1, #1 seed in D4, 16-2 combined record, and the highest scoring team in the League by a TON at 50.1 PPG (only one other team broke the 40 point barrier).  More on that 50.1 PPG later...
#2 David "Bro" Kleckler - Tight Ends in Motion
Last Week:  Lost to Frodo Swaggins 21-20
The top spot was Bro's for the taking, and all Tight Ends had to do was beat a D2 team in a crossover game.  Of course, this isn't just any D2 team we're talking about, as "D1.5" Frodo crushed Bro's chances at finishing the year in the top spot in our rankings AND getting a first round bye for the playoffs.  We are huge believers in Frodo Swaggins, but we can't claim to have seen this coming.  Didn't TEIM lose a D2 Crossover game last season also?  
#3 Bobby McConnell - Eyes Downtown
Last Week:  Did Not Play
We didn't see Bobby at the fields this week as Eyes Downtown lost to Legends without him.  We thought this guy never missed a game??
#4 Mike Thomas - Sticky Bandits
Last Week:  Beat Passed Our Prime 44-6, tied Grey Hair - Don't Care 31-31
The Sticky Bandits did JUST enough to pass Eyes Downtown in the standings to take the #3 seed in the D1 bracket by crushing Passed Our Prime and then tying a severely shorthanded Grey Hair team.  Mike finished last season just two points shy of the TSL scoring title, and although Sticky Nation dropped to 15th in scoring this session, they always seem to save a big win or two for playoffs.
#5 Garrett Beesing - Frodo Swaggins
Last Week:  Beat Tight Ends in Motion 21-20
It's not impossible to beat a team in a division higher than you in a crossover game, but it's not supposed to happen against the TOP TEAM IN THE LEAGUE!  Tight Ends might have been missing a player or two, but so was Frodo... in fact their top girl wasn't available, because she was playing against them with Tight Ends in Motion.  Major, major credit to Garrett and his teammates for going up against the best in the League and coming out on top.  Sorry we didn't move you up in the Power Rankings!
#6 Kyle Conniff - No Punt Intended
Last Week:  Beat Freeballers 34-28
No Punt Intended's only two losses this season were a D1 crossover in their very first game as a team, and the week that Kyle wasn't in town.  Upsets happen in the playoffs, and we usually love that unpredictable element.  Having said that, every single person on our Committee is rooting to see Frodo vs No Punt Intended III in the Finals.  There can only be one champion!
#7 Jeremy "Hogan" Olson - Passed Our Prime
Last Week:  Beat Scared Hitless 33-15, lost to Sticky Bandits 44-6
Passed Our Prime are no cowards.  They won D2 and moved up, knowing that it would cost them their two best players.  Then they scraped together just enough of a short-handed team this past week to beat Scared Hitless and move out of last place in the D1 standings.  Yes, they also got killed by the Sticky Bandits, but again, short-handed!  Hogan makes this team dangerous for playoffs.
#8 Dylan Day - Scared Hitless
Last Week:  Lost to Passed Our Prime 33-15
Scared Hitless finished with a negative point differential against every team in their division this session.  They lost to Legends, Tight Ends and Sticky Bandits, went 0-1-1 against Grey Hair, and 1-1 against Passed Our Prime.  Are they overrated because they haven't been better than a single opponent?  Or underrated because most of those games were so close?  It's really tough to say.  More on that in the division analysis below!
#9 Dave Eickhoff - Grey Hair - Don't Care
Last Week:  Tied Sticky Bandits 31-31
They say tying a game is like kissing your sister.  If that's true, then Grey Hair Don't Care has gone full Targaryen over the last couple of weeks on a 0-0-2 streak against Scared Hitless and Sticky Bandits.  No one can accuse these guys of not playing competitive games!  Mercifully the playoffs are up next, and they'll have to finally win or lose a game... against the team they JUST tied last week.
#10 Jeremy Burr - Untouchaballs
Last Week:  Beat the Replacements 39-0
The Untouchaballs are 2-0 against The Replacements outscoring them 77-12.  They have also forfeited two games this session, which means they've only played five "real" games this season.  It's tough to evaluate how well they'll do in playoffs with such a uniquely small sample size.  Could they beat DILFS?  Sure, they almost did last time the two teams played.  But we can't see them getting past No Punt Intended or Frodo.
#11 Vince Taverna - Puckett All-Stars
Last Week:  Beat Spinelli's Plumbing 46-30
Puckett All-Stars were the ONLY standard co-ed team (ie not the Cunning Stunts) to break 40 points per game this session as they finished at 42.9 PPG.  That's pretty impressive!  The next closest team ironically was Spinelli's Plumbing who WOULD have cracked 40 PPG if not for the Puckett All-Stars defense limiting them to 30 this past week.  
#12 Travis Cleavenger - DILFS
Last Week:  Beat Buffalo Vice Retro 42-29
We're just assuming Dubey has retired at this point because it seems like the DILFS are all Travis lately.  And why shouldn't they be?  Frodo and No Punt Intended are (rightfully) getting all the credit in D2 because they have better records and MUCH better point differentials, but if we look at offense only, it's NPI 37.1 PPG, Frodo 36.1 PPG, and DILFS 35.1 PPG.  Not a lot of difference between these teams... except that the DILFS defense has allowed about a hundred more points.
#13 Dylan Jaloza - Freeballers
Last Week:  Lost to No Punt Intended 34-28
Freeballers are the definition of "average" in D2 right now in the middle of the standings and all our charts (more on that below).  But they've lost to Frodo by 11, and NPI by only 6 this past week.  You think these guys don't believe they can beat either of those super teams?  
#14 Nick Hawes - Spinelli's Plumbing
Last Week:  Lost to Puckett All-Stars 46-30
Spinelli's finished with the third best offense in the TSL, one session after finishing with the seventh best offense in the TSL.  Consistent!  Too bad they're 38th in defense.  Kind of feels like that may come back to bite them in the playoffs, right?
#15 Scott Drosendahl - Scott Seniors Starting
Last Week:  Lost to Can't Touch This 46-44
Did Scott Seniors Starting implode exactly like we predicted they would?  Well, they're a narrow Bullet Club loss away from a five-game losing streak to end the season, so yes, we'll say we got that one right.  But Scotty is STILL the highest scoring QB in his division at 35.3 PPG, so let's not blame him?
#16 Jeff Easton - Bullet Club
Last Week:  Did Not Play (forfeit win)
After a Get Schwifty forfeit to end their regular season, Bullet Club finished with seven wins, which... look, we didn't go back and check the stats because it's exhausting, but we'd guess that's as many wins as they've had in maybe the last four seasons combined.  It's been a rough stretch for this once powerful team.  Good to see not only are they back in contention again, but they're doing it with Jeff Easton, franchise leader in every passing category (yes, probably picks too).
#17 Cody McGregor - Mountain Dew Me
Last Week:  Beat 716 34-26, beat Can't Touch This 28-21
Mountain Dew Me was barely on our radar a couple weeks ago, but now we can't remember why.  They lost to 716 by a single point a few weeks ago.  Had they converted one more 2-point attempt, they'd be on an eight-game winning streak right now.  Sorry for not noticing you, Cody!  We got there eventually...
#18 Ryan Dougherty - Can't Touch This
Last Week:  Lost to Mountain Dew Me 28-21, beat Scott Seniors Starting 46-44
Last season Can't Touch This "figured out" the co-ed touch football game partway through the season and went on a tear through D4.  This session they're still doing "fine" in D3, if you consider a 4-5 record and the 29th best offense in the TSL fine, but no one is more gifted than Ryan Dougherty, so we can't help but feel like they should be a little bit better.
#19 Brandon "B" Ford - Practice Squad
Last Week:  Lost to Itches and Ohs 41-31
Practice Squad was THE team to beat in D4, and now they've officially finished in last place in the D3 standings this session.  That probably proves that there's a BIT of a talent gap between divisions, right?  Keep that in mind next time you're complaining about how your team's QB isn't ranked higher than the guys with losing records in divisions above him!  But we digress.  B, you're a wonderful QB and you'll figure this out.  But you're not winning D3 this session.
#20 John Langley - Travis Henry's Kids
Last Week:  Beat Cunning Stunts 56-40
This was the signature win that Travis Henry's Kids have been waiting for all session.  With their season on the line and facing elimination, John Langley played the game of his life and beat the undefeated Cunning Stunts.  Oh, the Stunts will still be favorites against THK in the playoffs this week and rightfully so, but John is ready to flip the script on his "playoff choker" narrative and surprise some people.
#21 Zack Elphick - Zack Attack
Last Week:  Beat TOX 30-12
Since their humbling 31-0 loss to Buffalo Vice, Zack Attack have gone 3-0 and won by a combined 117-32.  They have absolutely murdered ILF, Cobblestone and TOX.  They won't be THE favorite in the D4 playoffs this session, but they're not far behind.
#22 Seth Molisani - Buffalo Vice Retro
Last Week:  Lost to DILFS 42-29
Buffalo Vice Retro lost again for sixth time this season, but the offense didn't look half bad against DILFS.  Sure, DILFS have one of the worst defenses in the division, but that's still a veteran team that Seth played well against.  We're under no illusions that they won't get smoked by the Freeballers this week, but you never know!
#23 Ryan Henry - TMA
Last Week:  Beat Today's Feast 48-40
Can you imagine if TMA had lost a third game in a row?? Fortunately, you don't have to, as they beat Today's Feast by a single score and finished the season 7-2 with the #1 seed and a first-round bye.  Yes, TMA is still the team to beat in D5, but a few weeks ago they were untouchable, and now they're simply very good.  Let's see what version of them shows up on October 22nd.
#24 Steve Moser - Itches and Ohs
Last Week:  Beat Practice Squad 41-31
After a week out of our Top 25 Steve Moser is officially back, having defeating Practice Squad after tying them earlier in the season.  Itches narrowly beat out Get Schwifty to avoid having the lowest scoring offense in D3 this session.  A very un-Moser like session.  Maybe they've been holding back for the playoffs?
#25 Derek Pew - 716
Last Week:  Lost Mountain Dew Me 34-26
716 is third in their division in the standings, but it's worth pointing out that they're actually outscoring both of the "better" teams ahead of them (Bullet Club and Mountain Dew Me).  They're loaded with talent and very capable of beating anyone over the next couple of weeks.  We almost wrote "capable of upsetting anyone", but then we decided it wouldn't feel like much of an "upset" if 716 won.
Division by Division Review
For our final stats review of the season, we're going to show you the following:
  • The breakdown of best offenses, defenses and net point differentials per division.  As always, stats below have removed forfeit games from the math, so what you see on the charts may not match the website (intentionally).  We tried to color each team's data by their official jersey colors, but half this league apparently uses black so it's not perfect.
  • A graph of average point differentials per game for each division with a similar "Favorites, Contenders, Pretenders" logic we've used in previous seasons (if you're winning games by an average of 7+ PPG, you're a Favorite in green; if you're losing by an average of 7+ PPG, you're a Pretender in red; all other teams are yellow in the middle; these are not OUR judgments on who falls into each category, it's strictly based on the math of your team's point differentials).  For what it's worth, in the last four seasons that we've been showing these graphs, we've had 15 eventual division champions classified as "Favorites", 9 as "Contenders", and exactly zero as "Pretenders" (although Woodpeckers last session was pretty close!)
  • A quick twitter sized recap of the division heading into playoffs, and then identifying which teams are "overrated" and "underrated" in each group.  Note that these last two categories are based purely on what we see in the scores and stats, NOT our own personal feelings of players on each team (we might personally think TMA is overrated, but if the underlying numbers say their team is underrated, that's where we'll include them below) so TRY not to be offended thinking the "website is being mean".  We're just reading numbers off a website, man.  Relax.
And away we go!
Division 1

The Headline:  Two great teams are expected to meet in the Finals, two others are hoping to crash the party, while the other three are all longshots.
Underrated:  It would be easy to say Tight Ends in Motion are the most underrated team in the division since they have by far the best point differential in the entire LEAGUE despite being a #2 seed in their own division.  But they also lost to a D2 team last week and Legends the week before that, so as far as momentum goes, they are ice cold at the moment.  
Instead, we'll take Scared Hitless as the most underrated team in D1.  Were they a great squad this session?  They were not.  But they weren't "last place in their division" bad either.  Four of their six losses were by one score, and they were at far less than full strength in another.  To have a shot in any division you have to be able to hang with the best teams, and Scared Hitless lost to Legends by 8, Sticky Bandits by 7, and Eyes Downtown by 10.  They were only truly outclassed in one horrific defeat against Tight Ends in Motion (who of course they play in the first round this weekend).  Assuming they're at full strength, as most teams tend to be for playoffs, who knows?
Overrated:  Last season three of the four teams in D1 had equally potent offenses but Legends separated itself from the pack with its dominating defense.  This session the returning champs are only fourth in their division defensively and third in the division in total point differential, despite having the best record.  Yes, there's something to be said for winning close games, but their one loss was a BIG one when they lost by 31 to Tight Ends in Motion.  Are they "overrated"?  Only if you consider them a heavy favorite (which they're not).
No, for our most overrated team in D1 we'll take Eyes Downtown.  They have the second-best point differential in their division (sixth in the League) and they're the #4 seed in the D1 bracket which would actually imply they're UNDER rated... but they've also padded their stats by murdering teams in games that were already over.  The combined score of their three games against Buffalo Vice Retro, Passed Our Prime without its starting QB, and a bad game by the Sticky Bandits was 150-32.  Take those games away and their point differential on the season drops from +108 to -10.  They should win their first-round matchup, but are they going to beat two of the other teams above them in the standings back-to-back?  We wouldn't bet on it.
Division 2

The Headline: Two great super-teams are expected to battle for the D2 Championship, with four others hoping for major upsets along the way.  The Replacements are also here.
Underrated:  You already know they're great, but can we just remind people for the 10,000th time in this article that No Punt Intended is STILL undefeated against their own division with their starting QB present?  We'll copy and paste this from the QB Rankings above: "No Punt Intended's only two losses this season were a D1 crossover in their very first game as a team, and the week that Kyle wasn't in town".  Take away those two games (and of course a forfeit win over Untouchaballs which isn't included in the numbers above anyway) and their point differential per game rises from +8.13 PDPG to a whopping +18.8 PDPG... which would be the best in the entire TSL.  You know they're great and you're STILL underrating them.
Overrated:  Freeballers are third in the D2 standings which sounds like they should have a decent chance to compete for a championship... until you remember that their stats are padded by a 61-0 annihilation of The Replacements and a forfeit win over Untouchaballs.  They have two actual wins on the season not counting those games, both of which came against the DILFS, and a -7.2 PDPG if we toss out the Replacements massacre (which would drop them into "pretender" status on the chart above).  They'll probably beat Buffalo Vice Retro this weekend in our opinion... but that'll be the last game they win this session.
We Don't Know What The Hell They Are:  We didn't include them in either Overrated or Underrated above, but let's take a second to talk about the Untouchaballs, who had one of the weirdest seasons in recent memory.  Are they overrated?  Underrated?  We still have no idea!  They took two forfeit losses this season, another loss to Buffalo Vice Retro when Travis subbed at QB, another loss in a D1 Crossover game to TEIM, and they were the only team to play The Replacements twice.  Those last two games don't count (we don't mean to kick them when they're down, but the Replacements are not currently a competitive team in D2) so that means Untouchaballs only played three competitive games this session against teams they might meet again in the playoffs.  They've beaten a full-strength Buffalo Vice Retro by 18, lost to Frodo Swaggins by 2, and lost to DILFS by 2.  What are we supposed to make of that??  The Untouchaballs could make the Finals and it wouldn't shock us.  They could get wiped out in the first round and it wouldn't shock us.  Your guess is as good as ours.
Division 3

The Headline:  The TSL's most wide-open division by far.  No dominant teams and no trash teams means anything can (and probably will) happen.
Underrated:  How are we going to pick overrated and underrated teams in D3?? The best team in this division is winning by +8.3 PDPG.  The worst team is losing by -6.4 PDPG, only 14.7 PDPG worse than the best team.  Here's how that compares to other divisions, graphing the difference between the best and worst teams in each instance:
We modeled D2 with and without The Replacements because they're really throwing the comparison off in that division.  So, what's the point of this graph?  Essentially the taller the bar, the wider the gap between the best and worst teams in the division. And D3 is the shortest bar, which means it's the tightest division top to bottom.  With so many relatively even teams it's going to be splitting hairs to declare one "overrated" or "underrated", but we'll take a shot at this anyway...
The most underrated team in D3 is Practice Squad.  Why?  Because they're a #8 seed going up against a #1 seed this weekend that they've already played well against twice this season.  Practice Squad started the season with a 28-18 win against Mountain Dew Me, and then lost the very next week to the same opponent by a score of 33-32.  You think they're going to feel intimidated going up against a team they could easily be 2-0 against?  And what happens if they play well again and knock off the top team in their division?  The confidence boost could carry them to a second consecutive Finals game.  Look, we're not saying it's likely (Mountain Dew Me has improved tremendously since those first couple weeks) but we wouldn't give ANY division's lowest seeded playoff team better odds to win their division than Practice Squad.
Overrated:  Again, same story as above (if there aren't a lot of truly underrated teams, you won't see a lot of truly overrated teams) but we'll take Scott Senior's Starting as the most overrated team here based solely on their recent trend.  As we said in the QB Rankings above, they're a narrow Bullet Club loss away from a five-game losing streak to end the season, and they've surrendered an average of 37.8 PPG defensively over that stretch.  That's not the type of momentum you want right now going into the playoffs.  
Division 4