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Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 20 October 2023 15:13
Published: Friday, 20 October 2023 15:13
Written by Jeff Krol
Hits: 357


Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, we’ve made it to the final stage of our magical journey through time and space. The final battles of the Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality have arrived. Championship Saturday is here. On Saturday, October 21st, in the Year of Our Lord 2023, 24 teams across the TSL’s 6 divisions will compete for those 6 championships (with our 7th, Breakfast Club, already being decided) with everything they have. Blood, sweat, swearing, tears, hugs, laughter…every emotion will be on display this weekend. And chances are they’re going to be battling in the same slightly chilly, slightly windy, and a little bit rainy conditions to do it in. 


But who are the teams that survived Playoff Saturday? And yes, I mean survived. We were treated to some VERY interesting games. Teams won with 5 players! The rain caused a lot of slips and slides along the way that affected all of our games. Teams won in overtime. Teams won with time running out. Some teams just stomped other teams. But they weren’t the teams you expected. That’s right, Playoff Saturday lived up to its craziness yet again as TEN out of the 21 lower seeded teams pulled off upsets last week. We had two #1 seeds lose, two #2 seeds lose, two #3 seeds lose, and four #4 seeds were sent home packing as well. It potentially could’ve been even more if the D1 seeds had a game! 


The best part of any TSL season is the unpredictability of Playoff Saturday, and we got our money’s worth last weekend. Now, we turn our attention to Championship Saturday, where things tend to be slightly less crazy. Part of an 8-seed winning over a #1 seed is because they can capitalize on the “surprise” factor. #1 seeds tend to overlook the 0-9 or 1-8 teams that got beat up on all season, and before they know it, they’re losing and trying too hard to make a comeback that only leads to more mistakes and frustration.  But on Championship Saturday, they lose the surprise factor they had a week ago. An upset is much harder to pull off. But, as always, they still happen. A lot. 


The finish line for the Race for Social Co-Ed Immortality is within sight. Teams will be clawing at each other to be the first one over the line. But who will it be? Luckily for you, I’m here to tell you. 



Last Week’s Games:


#5 Frodo Swaggins 35, #4 Sticky Bandits 25


Frodo Swaggins have played 11 games total this season. 4 of those games have come against Sticky. 3 of those games have resulted in wins for Frodo. Frodo only has 3 wins on the season. Their reward? The 3 time defending champion Legends. 

This Week’s Games:


#1 Legends (7-2) vs #5 Frodo Swaggins (2-8)


Points For: Legends 39.00 (2nd), Frodo 31.10 (5th)

Points Against: Legends 32.67 (3rd), Frodo 49.00 (5th)

TSL Rank: Legends 2nd, Frodo 45th

Past Games: 52-40 Legends, 61-24 Legends

Line: Legends (-10)

The ride for Frodo has been pretty fun the last few weeks, but they’re about to run into a dose of reality. The Legends have felt like they were toying with the league all season as though they were bored: trotting out different QBs, players missing games, fun plays, etc. And they’re still 7-2 and the TSL’s 2nd ranked team. (The #1 ranked team? Cunning Stunts, also QB’d by Joey Batts). Now they’re going to take a game seriously? Yikes. LEGENDS BY 14

#2 Eyes Downtown (7-2) vs #3 Losing Streak (4-5)


Points For: ED 41.89 (1st), LS 36.00 (3rd)

Points Against: ED 30.78 (1st), LS 32.11 (2nd)

TSL Rank: ED 3rd, LS 30th

Past Games: 34-24 ED, 47-33 ED

Line: Eyes Downtown (-7)

Eyes Downtown had a very good season in which they went 7-2, and all of their new pieces of the championship puzzle (Derek, Katie, Amber, Kyle…what a job in free agency) really figured out their places on the team quickly. It resulted in Eyes Downtown arguably being the best team in D1, at least by the stats, but a failure to beat the Legends more often put them into a dangerous matchup against Losing Streak. Don’t let the 4-5 record fool you, Losing Streak has just as much talent as the teams above them. Any team that trots out Chris, Ralph, Keyon, Stoner Dave, etc are going to be good. Don’t forget that having Robin, Crystal, and Brit isn’t exactly a bad thing. The talent is there, putting it all together (and having everyone show up at once) has been the slight challenge this season. This one should be an exciting game. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 3

The Prediction: Legends vs Eyes Downtown. It may be chalk, but these two have been on a D1 collision course since before the season began. The storylines are immaculate. Legends getting Andy to play with them to make their roster even better leads to Tight Ends folding, which leads to Eyes Downtown getting much stronger overall. If Legends lose, they have themselves to blame. It’s so very hard to choose here. Both of these teams come across like they’re family. They hang out outside of football. They do it right. With respect to the Stunts, they’re the best two teams in the TSL. I hate giving the Legends bulletin board material, but screw it. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 1



Last Week’s Games:


#1 Freeballers 47, #8 Practice Squad 22

#7 Scared Hitless 24, #2 Can’t Touch This 13

#3 The Untouchaballs 24, #6 THREAD 6

#5 Cle-Avengers Assemble 27, #4 Mavericks 22

The Freeballers took care of business and got a little bit of revenge against Practice Squad from last season’s playoff upset. Scared Hitless reminded the TSL that they’re much better than they’ve shown all season, upsetting Can’t Touch This, which I accurately predicted last week. I tried to tell you. The Untouchaballs were fantastic in their dismantling of THREAD, setting up a match with Cle-Ass as Travis and Co beat the Mavericks in a close game. 

This Week’s Games:

#1 Freeballers (7-2) vs #7 Scared Hitless (2-7)


Points For: FB 41.22 (1st), SH 27.33 (7th)

Points Against: FB 26.78 (1st), SH 34.22 (4th)

TSL Rank: FB 5th, SH 40th

Past Games: 42-32 FB, 38-19 FB

Line: Freeballers (-10)

As great as the Scared Hitless story was from last week, they’re still a flawed team that’s missing a piece. They got a perfect matchup in CTT, and they took advantage of it. Now they’re getting the Freeballers, a team that’s rounding into form for a run in D1 next spring, after having the top offense and defense in D2 this season. Can Scared Hitless pull off another upset? Yes. Will they? FREEBALLERS BY 7

#3 The Untouchaballs (6-3) vs #5 Cle-Avengers Assemble (4-5)


Points For: UT 37.67 (3rd), Cle-Ass 32.33 (5th)

Points Against: UT 27.78 (2nd), Cle-Ass 34.33 (5th)

TSL Rank: UT 16th, Cle-Ass 27th

Past Games: 39-27 UT, 20-8 Cle-Ass

Line: The Untouchaballs (-3) 

This feels like a little bit of a rivalry game here. Untouchaballs have been looking to reclaim the D2 title after losing it to Travis’ team last season. As always, this is a different team than last season, but it’s close enough that Burr doesn’t care and will use this matchup to fuel him. This should have the most smack talking of the day, and it should be incredibly exciting. This game is what playoff football is about. THE UNTOUCHABALLS BY 6

The Prediction: Freeballers vs The Untouchaballs. Well, this is fun. We get the top two teams in D2 (according to the various charts from the QB ranking articles) going head to head. These two teams just played a couple of weeks ago, with the Untouchaballs winning 37-14. That shouldn’t go unnoticed. As good as the Freeballers have been this season, the Untouchaballs have been this good in D2 for many seasons now, AND they have something to prove after last year? THE UNTOUCHABALLS BY 8



Last Week’s Games: 


#1 The Family 21, #8 716 0 (Forfeit)

#2 The Malones 36, #7 Let’s Get Reccked 20

#3 Keller Whales 35, #6 Vaspian 9

#4 Wanderers 48, #5 Bullet Club 15


D3 proceeded to give us the most shocking results of Playoff Saturday as the division where anyone could win really turned into the “haves” and the “have nots”, as not only did every top seed win, they did so quite easily. The Family got a bye week after 716 forfeit because they’d have only 5 players. The Malones out raced LGR, the Keller Whales locked down Vaspian, and the Wanderers looked like it was 2015 all over again. 

This Week’s Games:

#1 The Family (7-2) vs #4 Wanderers (5-4)


Points For: Family 45.88 (1st), Wanderers 40.44 (3rd)

Points Against: Family 31.88 (3rd), Wanderers 36.00 (7th)

TSL Rank: Family 4th, Wanderers 24th

Past Games: 40-38 Family

Line: The Family (-8)

The Family became juggernauts in D3, and haven’t really had trouble with many teams since Week 1. One team that they struggled with? The Wanderers, who only had lost to The Fam by 2 points. TSL Playoff football is a different animal, as we all know. I’ve struggled with this game for a few reasons. One, the Wanderers already showed they can keep up with The Family. Two, The Family is a FAST team, and the more I think about it, the more I realized that the amazing weather all season really helped them. That isn’t to say they aren’t talented regardless, but giving them perfect conditions all season made everything work even better. Three, it’s going to rain. The field is going to be muddy. It’s the great equalizer. Anyone who’s ever played Social Co-Ed Touch Football knows that it’s a different game. And that’s a game The Family (at least most of the roster) isn’t used to. But the Wanderers thrive in that. They’ve played in it for the last 100 years. I can NOT believe I’m saying this, but give me the team with the experience. THE WANDERERS BY 2

#2 The Malones (6-3) vs #3 Keller Whales (6-3)


Points For: Malones 44.22 (2nd), KW 36.33 (4th)

Points Against: Malones 33.22 (4th), KW 34.22 (5th)

TSL Rank: Malones 10th, KW 15th

Past Games: 44-34 KW, 53-30 Malones

Line: The Malones (-6)

Aren’t 2-3 seed matchups fun? The Malones have burst onto the scene, nearly winning D3, putting up tons of points, and now they’re on the TSL podcast too? (Rhace was on last week, it was a good listen, go check it out if you want to know who this team actually is.) They’re doing it all, and now they get a Keller Whales team with a boatload of experience who are having one of their best seasons in a while. Damien Keller has looked good most of the time, with some growing pains at QB sprinkled in. All-world Katie Keller, the captain of the “should be in a higher division because she’s too good” team, is a matchup nightmare for anyone. But I don’t think it’s going to matter here. Call it a hunch. THE MALONES BY 10

The Prediction: The Malones vs Wanderers. I don’t think I had this D3 final on my bingo board at the beginning of the season. It’s a fantastic tale of a brand new team in The Malones (to football, not just the TSL) against one of the most legendary social co-ed touch football teams in history in the Wanderers. The Wanderers missed out on a championship last season, losing against Can’t Touch This, so there’s some “let’s get it this time” in their favor. And the Wanderers already beat The Malones 43-33, but that was a different time. The Malones have figured out the TSL game a bit more than they had in Week 1. I don’t expect a blowout either way. THE MALONES BY 1



Last Week’s Games:


#1 Cunning Stunts 61, #8 TMA 36

#2 ILF 20, #7 Father Baker 0

#3 Buffalo Vice 50, #6 Travis Henry’s Kids 14

#5 Puckett All-Stars 46, #4 PWI 32

Not exactly unsurprising here. The Stunts went out and scored 60, as they tend to do, against an overmatched TMA team (Jeff Krol owes you a written apology). ILF was masterful on defense, shutting out Father Baker, as the girls might’ve been better with anyone else at QB. Buffalo Vice scored 50, which isn’t surprising. What’s surprising is that THK couldn’t keep up. Finally, Puckett showed up and showed out in the playoffs, as they always end up doing, taking out PWI.

This Week’s Games:

#1 Cunning Stunts (9-0) vs #5 Puckett All-Stars (5-4)


Points For: CS 51.00 (1st), PAS 35.11 (3rd)

Points Against: CS 32.11 (4th), PAS 30.67 (2nd)

TSL Rank: CS 1st, PAS 21st

Past Games: 44-40 CS

Line: Cunning Stunts (-8)

Stop me if you’ve heard this before. The Cunning Stunts are on a tear, winning 10 straight games now, and looking to recapture a championship that has eluded them for a little bit. They get a Puckett All-Stars team that kind of coasted through the season, but has already upset one team in the playoffs. A tale as old as time: the Stunts look hot and they get the greatest “underdogs” in TSL history, which usually results in a major upset that we talk about for years. The Stunts only beat Puckett by 4. Puckett has females that can keep up with the Stunts’ ladies. One of these times the Stunts have to win here, right? Right. CUNNING STUNTS BY 6

#2 Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (6-3) vs #3 Buffalo Vice (5-4)


Points For: ILF 28.78 (7th), Vice 38.11 (2nd)

Points Against: ILF 23.44 (1st), Vice 34.11 (6th)

TSL Rank: ILF 18th, Vice 19th

Past Games: 37-8 Vice

Line: EVEN

It’s one hell of a matchup here in D4, as two evenly matched teams come out to do battle in ILF and Buffalo Vice. This game will come down to one thing: how well ILF’s vaunted defense does against the high scoring offense of Buffalo Vice. Last time these two met, it didn’t go too well, as Vice put up 37 in an easy win. While ILF certainly learned from that game, the issues I see arising are if ILF can make the right adjustments on BOTH sides of the ball. Even if they have Vice score 10 points less and they score 10 more on their side, that’s still a 27-18 loss. It feels like this is the perfect matchup for Vice, as long as they don’t beat themselves. BUFFALO VICE BY 10

The Prediction: Cunning Stunts vs Buffalo Vice. A bit of a rivalry over the last few seasons, this one is a great matchup to end the Fall season on. (For those not paying attention, the D4 final is the last game of the day at 3:00). Expect a high scoring affair, but at the end of the day the story has been about the Stunts all year. They don’t feel as vulnerable as they have in the past. This season has felt like they’ve been on a mission, and there’s only one way I see this game going. Mission Complete. CUNNING STUNTS BY 12



Last Week’s Games: 


#8 Not So Sticky 43, #1 Spinelli’s Plumbing 34

#7 Cobblestone 26, #2 Come From Behind 18 (OT)

#6 Goatsack! 27, #3 GUCCI 26

#4 Creekers 38, #5 BAADies 0

Chaos reigns supreme in D5 as the Top 3 seeds all fall. Not So Sticky does it again, waiting until the playoffs to really bring it, pulling the upset win. Cobblestone not only beat Come From Behind in OT, they did it with only 5 players, which is remarkable. Goatsack! got a huge win over GUCCI to advance, and the Creekers answered any questions about if they could handle a gender team with an easy shutout victory to move on. 

This Week’s Games:


#4 Creekers (6-3) vs #8 Not So Sticky (0-9)


Points For: Creekers 31.22 (6th), NSS 20.11 (8th)

Points Against: Creekers 25.44 (2nd), NSS 38.22 (7th)

TSL Rank: Creekers 14th, NSS 48th

Past Games: 28-8 Creekers

Line: Creekers (-10)

The Creekers find themselves entering Championship Saturday exactly how they expected: As the top seed in the playoffs remaining. They just didn’t think they’d be doing it as the 4th seed. The Creekers came in and handled business last week, and now they have a much easier path to a title than they imagined they would at this time a week ago. With that said, Not So Sticky has a habit of playing great football when it counts. NSS is a smart team, loaded with players that have played in (and owned) football leagues for years. The Creekers are still relatively newer, so they have to stay on their toes if they want to advance. Not So Sticky will give them a battle, but the Creekers move on. CREEKERS BY 3

#6 Goatsack! (3-5-1) vs #7 Cobblestone (3-6)


Points For: GS 29.44 (7th), Cobblestone 32.44 (5th)

Points Against: GS 35.22 (6th), Cobblestone 34.11 (5th)

TSL Rank: GS 34th, Cobblestone 38th

Past Games: 29-28 GS

Line: EVEN

Goatsack pulled a fantastic one point upset over GUCCI that most people didn’t see coming last week. Now they get a Cobblestone team they pulled out a one point victory over during the regular season in the next round of the playoffs that pulled out a shocking victory of their own. A 5-man OT victory over CFB is about as shocking as things could get. I’m happy for both of these teams, even though I don’t think I’d have ever bet that one of them will be in the championship game. There’s just something about this Cobblestone team lately, that they’ve really turned things around in the second half of the season. Andy is a great QB for Goatsack!, but I’m going to believe in one of the greatest of all time. COBBLESTONE BY 6

The Prediction: Creekers vs Cobblestone. I’m sure everyone expected this matchup in the finals. What a storyline this game is. Creekers, coming off a season where they went winless, find themselves in the championship game against Darryl Carr QB Superstar and the rest of Cobblestone. Cobblestone, despite playing for a decade, has NEVER won a championship. We’re so close to a Cobblestone championship, and despite all the good the Creekers have done this season, they’re going up against a team of destiny. FINALLY. GET THE CORONAS ON ICE! COBBLESTONE BY 8



Last Week’s Games:


#8 Back That Pass Up 31, #1 Balls Deep 20

#2 Blitzkrieg 41, #7 Just Get Open 23

#6 Mighty Drunks 28, #3 Pit Harade 27

#5 Two Tuddies 33, #4 Sausage McMuffins 18


Back That Pass Up not only pulled off the upset over Balls Deep, they did it with 5 players. Vegas would’ve paid that out at +1000000. I guess that’s why people weren’t talking about Balls Deep all that much. Huge win for BTPU. Blitzkrieg took care of business against JGO. Mighty Drunks capped a big comeback win over Pit Harade at the end of the game and Two Tuddies figured out what was wrong with their offense finally, getting a win over the McMuffins.

This Week’s Games:

#2 Blitzkrieg (6-3) vs #8 Back That Pass Up (1-8)


Points For: BK 31.44 (3rd), BTPU 17.22 (8th)

Points Against: BK 29.67 (5th), BTPU 34.56 (8th)

TSL Rank: BK 8th, BTPU 47th

Past Games: 37-0 BK

Line: Blitzkrieg (-10)

Blitzkrieg won their first round matchup expecting to have to prepare for an incredibly tough path to a championship. Instead, as the smoke cleared, they found themselves as the only top seed remaining in D6, realizing the path to a title got a little bit easier. After quite a few heartbreaks over the years, this team is in the driver’s seat for their first ever championship. They shouldn’t take any opponent for granted. BTPU was led by James “Hitman” Hearn and QB Buddy Lee to the upset of the century. I don’t think they expected it either when they walked to the fields with only 5 players, but fate smiled upon them last week. It’s a fantastic story, but in reality they’re facing a Blitzkrieg team that just shut them out recently in a 37-0 win, and even if BTPU gets a few players back this week they didn’t have then, I can’t imagine it’ll matter. BLITZKRIEG BY 14


#5 Two Tuddies (4-5) vs #6 Mighty Drunks (4-5)


Points For: TT 24.11 (7th), MD 32.89 (2nd)

Points Against: TT 27.11 (4th), MD 31.78 (6th)

TSL Rank: TT 28th, MD 31st

Past Games: 27-14 TT

Line: EVEN

Last week, the Two Tuddies got their groove back on both sides of the ball and cruised to an easier than expected win over the McMuffins. The Mighty Drunks found a way to win with a late TD to beat Pit Harade. These teams have been quite similar all season, in that neither has been very consistent. At times, both teams were considered best in the division, and at other times everyone else was wondering what was wrong with them. None of that matters now. Both teams possess game changing players (Chris for TT, Cam for MD), and talented QBs as well. This one will come down to who blinks first. MIGHTY DRUNKS BY 7

The Prediction: Blitzkrieg vs Mighty Drunks. Both teams possess athletic players on both sides of the ball, both have good females, and both can score points. The Drunks beat BK 54-15 earlier in the season, which only tells me that BK was missing Light Red Hoodie Guy and that game shouldn’t count. The metrics say these two teams are evenly matched, with BK about 0.67 “better” than the Drunks. But this is Fall Blitzkrieg. This title is theirs for the taking. It’s time. BLITZKRIEG BY 6




  • Which division interests you the most? With the teams remaining, it has to be D3. All of those teams can be evenly matched, and there’s a fun blend of completely new team (Malones), new team that has old TSL vets on it (The Family), team that’s been around for a bit (Keller Whales), and team that’s been around even longer with mostly the same roster (Wanderers). D3 is the only division where I will not be surprised to hear that any of the remaining teams win the title. (Okay, maybe D4 has that going for them too.)




  • Which prediction are you most confident in? None of them. If I had to “rank” them in terms of most confidence to least: Cunning Stunts, Untouchaballs, Blitzkrieg, Cobblestone, Eyes Downtown, The Malones. 




  • If you had to pick alternate winners for each division, who are they? Legends, Freeballers, The Family, ILF, Creekers, Two Tuddies. 




  • What are the best “Storyline” title games possible? Legends vs Eyes Downtown is just it in D1. D2 would be Scared Hitless upsetting the Untouchaballs in the “Melanie Bowl”. D3 is The Family vs The Malones, the new guys to D3 coming in and marching to a title game that should set scoring records. D4 is Stunts vs ILF I guess, just to put the best defense against the best offense (and the Stunts only won 27-26 when they played). D5 is Cobblestone vs Not So Sticky, just to get the 7-8 matchup, with Jeff Krol standing in Darryl’s way. And D6 is Back That Pass Up vs Two Tuddies, the preseason best vs worst where BTPU has already beaten the Tuddies this season for their only win. 



  • Does the rain really play that much of a factor? In a word, yes. The ball is harder to catch and throw which means the ball can slip out of a QB or a WR’s hands. The ground is going to get muddy, especially as the day goes on, which will slow down the speedsters and EVERYONE will be slipping on offense and defense. Don’t be surprised if a game winning TD happens because the defense fell going for a tag. Wear Cleats, and go buy a cleat cleaner if you don’t already have one. And bring towels for the ball. 




  • Congratulations to Steph’s Misty-rious Infection for winning the Breakfast Club championship 35-17 over Becca. Steph’s 3rd title in 4 seasons. 




  • Games of the Day: 
  • All of them. It's Championship Saturday! 




  • I know you’re reading this because you want every last drop of TSL goodness in your system, even if you don’t have a game tomorrow. But who cares if you’re playing? Grab a raincoat, an umbrella, wear a garbage bag, and get yourself to the fields. Lots of teams show up to watch the finals, and then celebrate a great season at the bar with everyone before we have 6 months off….




  • ….except for the indoor season, where details are coming very soon. 




  • FRIDAY, DECEMBER 8TH IS THE TSL BANQUET. I want to make sure you know! The TSL’s biggest party of the year is at the Hotel Lafayette, and it’s a wedding without the wedding. TSLers dress up in suits and dresses, there’s awards, there’s an open bar, there’s dancing, there’s an open bar, and it's a GREAT way to say goodbye to the season. Tell everyone you know about it! 




  • With that in mind, Jeff is looking for you to vote on who you think should be nominated for the TSL awards! We give awards for Best Male, Best Female, and Best QB in each division, Most Underrated, Most Beloved, Best Defender, Best Referee, Biggest Villain, Best at the Bar (which team always rocks the bar), Team of the Year, Executive of the Year, and the Leonard Alba Person of the Year award. DON’T WORRY IF YOU DON’T ANSWER ALL OF THEM. Even if you just do your own division and that’s it, that’s okay. If you don’t know names, just describe them and what team they’re on. “The girl with the hair on the purple team” is okay, Jeff will just have some work to do. Here’s the link, you can only vote once: 






  • As always, treat other players and referees with respect. I was told of a few instances where refs gave penalties to players being jerks mid-game, as they’re instructed to do so. They’re going to call it, so just keep it together! 




  • Darryl Carr QB Superstar finally winning a championship with Cobblestone would be one of the best TSL stories ever. It makes me want to fly in to see it. I used to love playing against him. 




  • I already am doubting my predictions so here’s the actual ones: Legends, Freeballers, Wanderers, Puckett, Cobblestone, Blitzkrieg. That’s what I’d bet on. 




  • I was informed to remind everyone that tomorrow is Kelly Kane’s big Halloween party, October 27th is the TSL Costume Party at the Rose Garden, and people are trying to get the Costume Bowl on October 28th at 11:00am going, so if you’re interested you can sign up at the bar this weekend, you can respond on Facebook, on telegram, and wherever else you can. Tell Becca, Kory from Two Tuddies, Garrett, Joe K, and whoever else may be involved. 


With that, the Race For Social Co-Ed Immortality is coming to an end, and it’s going to be a spectacular ride. Good luck to the 24 teams remaining. 




Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 13 October 2023 15:09
Published: Friday, 13 October 2023 15:09
Written by Jeff Krol
Hits: 372

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, we’re here! The moment you’ve all been waiting for has arrived as the Race for Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality is set to begin. On Saturday, October 14th, in the Year of Our Lord 2023 44 of the TSL’s 49 teams will be preparing to do battle at the Lenny Alba Fields behind the Rose Garden to decide the 7 championships that are on the line. Again, Breakfast Club counts, just ask Topper. The only teams that won’t be playing either have a bye into Championship Saturday (the Top 3 teams in D1) or they’ve already been eliminated from playoff contention (the two Breakfast Club teams that lost last week). 


But for the rest of you, Playoff Saturday is the most important thing on your plate this weekend. For 8 grueling weeks, the TSL teams have played 9 regular season games in some of the best Fall Session weather that we’ve ever had. It made the Spring Sessions jealous. Naturally, that all comes crashing down. As the stakes get higher, the elements get harder. As of right now, my Weather Channel app says that Playoff Saturday is going to be a bit of a wet one, as there is rain in the forecast, it’ll be about 52 degrees, and the wind will be about 13 mph, coming from the East. If anyone has ever played in the wind on the fields, the open space tends to make a slight breeze feel like a hurricane. Prepare accordingly. Dress accordingly. Bring a change of clothes. 


Do whatever is necessary for you to be ready for your shot at Immortality. You only get two chances a year to prove that you’re one of the best Social Co-Ed Football teams in history. (Three, if you count the TSL Indoor League. The minor league championships don’t really count.) Everything you’ve done since late August brought you here, to this moment. Every single team other than the Cunning Stunts has at least 2 losses. And the Stunts aren’t perfect either, as Playoff Saturday has been their biggest opponent for the last few seasons. No teams should feel safe, as we’ve consistently seen that Playoff Saturday brings us a handful (or more) of upsets. #1 seeds constantly go home early. Just ask GUCCI about last season. 


The TSL regular season is just the warm up rounds for the next two weeks. You use those 8 weeks to work on your offense, your defense, your time management, and whatever else needs to be corrected for THIS MOMENT. THIS WEEK. Do not think you’re just going to coast into Championship Saturday. It never ends well for teams that do. 


After this week, only 24 teams will remain. Are you going to be one of them? 

(Disclaimer: As usual, the lines are given to me by the TSL Official Odds Committee in Las Vegas, The “TSL Rank” is based off a league wide overall ranking using very specific qualifications that Topper came up with on a wine bender 15 years ago and can’t remember. And of course we still just go with it. The PF/PA rankings are within the division, not the league. The “Last 3” is a team’s record in the final third of their season, to show who’s coming in “hot” and who’s coming in “not”.)



The Contenders: 


Legends (2-1)

Eyes Downtown (3-1)


The Pretenders:

Losing Streak (8-1)

Sticky Bandits (15-1)

Frodo Swaggins (20-1)

The Story: The Legends and Eyes Downtown both improved from the TEIM fire sale, and have distanced themselves slightly from the pack. Losing Streak is still a VERY good team that can’t be slept on. Sticky Bandits go from 8-0 to 3-6 in the blink of an eye, but to say they’re not capable of winning it all would be foolish. Frodo Swaggins is starting to show signs of life in the division, and they continue to get better. The Top 3 seeds all have byes into Championship Saturday, only giving us the 4-5 “play in” game this week. 

#4 Sticky Bandits (3-6) vs #5 Frodo Swaggins (2-8)


Points For: SB 32.22 (4th), Frodo 31.10 (5th)

Points Against: SB 33.67 (4th), Frodo 49.00 (5th)

TSL Rank: SB 37th, Frodo 45th

Last 3: SB 1-2, Frodo 1-2

Past Games:  37-28 SB, 39-30 Frodo, 38-36 Frodo

Line: Sticky Bandits (-3)

D1’s only game this week has some potential. The Sticky Bandits are mired in a rough season that they didn’t quite expect back in August. 3-6 was never on anyone’s mind in Sticky Nation, but here we are. And to make things worse, Sticky gets to play Frodo Swaggins, who may only have two wins on the season, but they’re both against Sticky. Frodo has been playing much better this season, and they’re looking like they’re starting to really “get it” in D1. They’re a talented team, but there’s a lot of newer players to the league that are still learning the TSL game in Social Co-Ed Football’s toughest division. It’s a trial by fire that they’re slowly getting the hang of. As much as I want to call the upset here, I can’t quite bring myself to do it. Sticky pulls this out in a close one. STICKY BANDITS BY 3.



The Contenders: 


Freeballers (3-1)

The Untouchaballs (3-1)

Mavericks (5-1)

The “Don’t Be Surprised When We Win This Thing”ers:


Can’t Touch This (7-1)

Cle-Avengers Assemble (7-1)

THREAD (7-1)


The Pretenders:


Scared Hitless (25-1)

Practice Squad (25-1)

The Story: Freeballers just figured it out and they’re on fire right now, rocketing up the standings the last few weeks. The Untouchaballs are ALWAYS contenders. The Mavericks can score in bunches, but will always worry about that defense. Can’t Touch This was the talk of the league at 6-0, but they’ve seemed to be a paper tiger ever since. Cle-Ass had a strong end to the season, as last year’s champs (sort of) can’t be counted out. THREAD has knocked off the rust and they’re looking like a hell of a veteran team you don’t want to play. Scared Hitless and Practice Squad just didn’t get the results they were hoping for this season, but as always, these two teams have a history of being Giant Killers in the playoffs, so do NOT sleep on them. 

#1 Freeballers (7-2) vs #8 Practice Squad (2-7)


Points For: FB 41.22 (1st), PS 19.89 (8th)

Points Against: FB 26.78 (1st), PS 37.78 (8th)

TSL Rank: FB 5th, PS 44th

Last 3: FB 3-0, PS 1-2

Past Games:  36-7 FB

Line: Freeballers (-14)


The Freeballers have had a rocket strapped to their backs for a few weeks now, and they’ve looked like D2’s most complete team overall. They’re first in offense and in defense. It took Scott and company a couple of seasons to really figure out what they were doing in D2, but they finally have the right personnel in place (which apparently means Hogan at QB, who knew?) and there’s just something about them this season that I really like. Practice Squad continues to hang in there in D2, and as they’ve won 2 more games this year than last year, they’re continuing to improve. What this team has done in the last few years is nothing short of impressive: Win D6, Lose D5 in OT, Win D4, Win D3 as an 8 seed, move to D2 and compete. Not very many teams have made that climb, which is why I’ll always point it out so our newer readers put some respect on the name. Can B and Team Lantz get this done? If they were playing ANY other D2 team, I’d say yes. But this Freeballers team is special. FREEBALLERS BY 16

#2 Can’t Touch This (6-3) vs #7 Scared Hitless (2-7)


Points For: CTT 33.33 (4th), SH 27.33 (7th) 

Points Against: CTT 32.89 (3rd), SH 34.22 (4th)

TSL Rank: CTT 13th, SH 40th

Last 3: CTT 0-3, SH 0-3

Past Games:  36-23 CTT, 25-22 CTT

Line: Can’t Touch This (-7)

Can’t Touch This won D3 last spring, came into D2, and won their first 6 games to be the talk of the entire TSL. QB Ryan Dougherty could do no wrong, as he’s expertly used his talented group of guys and girls to jump out to that 6-0 start. Since then? Things haven’t gone CTT’s way. They’ve lost their last 3 games, getting blown out by Freeballers and dropping two to THREAD. Which team are we getting? Scared Hitless moved to D2 after a few tough D1 seasons. They started off great, going 2-0 in Week 1, only to start a 7 game losing streak that had some close losses, but also some blowouts too. The offense continues to struggle as SH has yet to find ways to replace the talent that’s left them over the last few seasons, although the defense is still pretty good. If Scared Hitless can slow down the CTT offense, they have a real shot at this upset. I have a feeling we’ll see SH use some of the tricks they’ve picked up in D1 and resume their role as a giant killer here. SCARED HITLESS BY 2

#3 The Untouchaballs (6-3) vs #6 THREAD (4-5)


Points For: UT 37.67 (3rd), THREAD 32.11 (6th) 

Points Against: UT 27.78 (2nd), THREAD 34.78 (6th)

TSL Rank: UT 16th, THREAD 33rd

Last 3: UT 2-1, THREAD 2-1

Past Games:  47-41 THREAD

Line: The Untouchaballs (-3)

We seem to have ourselves a bit of a big game right here. The Untouchaballs didn’t have their best season ever, but something tells me they’re more focused on what they do in the playoffs than how they get there. The talent is still everywhere on this team, as Jeremy Burr still has Mel, Matt, and Ryan to throw to. And lots of times, that’s all he needs. They’re talented on both sides of the ball, and when they’re on, look out. THREAD was really only a couple of plays away from being the top seed in this division (or at least #2) as they’ve lost one point games to PS AND SH. They’ve beaten Freeballers, UT, and CTT (the top 3 seeds) and are 4-0 against them. The talent is there, with Dalfonso, Turner, Smith, and other top names from 2017. They’re very capable of pulling the upset, but I think UT has another gear they didn’t hit yet this season. THE UNTOUCHABALLS BY 2

#4 Mavericks (5-4) vs #5 Cle-Avengers Assemble (4-5)


Points For: Mavs 40.00 (2nd), Cle-Ass 32.33 (5th)

Points Against: Mavs 35.22 (7th), Cle-Ass 34.33 (5th)

TSL Rank: Mavs 23rd, Cle-Ass 27th

Last 3: Mavs 2-1, Cle-Ass 2-1

Past Games:  30-21 Mavs

Line: Mavericks (-6) 

These two teams are very similar in that they’re right in the middle of the standings and both believe they could’ve been higher if not for some roster issues on some weeks and if they had made one more play here or there. The Mavericks are an offensive machine with Jordan Lawson running the show. He consistently uses his top notch females and tall guys to move the ball all over the field. The Mavericks’ Achilles heel since joining the TSL, however, has been their defense, which is near the bottom of the division. Cle-Ass are the sort of defending champions only because Travis had to revamp the roster a bit. But he did it quite well, adding female superstars like Maggie and Casey. They got off to a slow start, mostly because they didn’t play much early in the season, but they’ve been on a roll since. They’re 2-1 in their last three, but that loss was a 1 point loss to the Freeballers. Cle-Ass has shown they can hang with anyone. There’s going to be points scored in this one, and it’s going to be close. CLE-AVENGERS ASSEMBLE BY 2



The Contenders: 


The Family (2-1)

The Malones (3-1)

Wanderers (6-1)

Keller Whales (8-1)


The “I Can See It”s:


Bullet Club (12-1)

Let’s Get Reccked (12-1)




Vaspian (20-1)


The Pretenders: 


716 (30-1)

The Story: The Family and The Malones inserted themselves into the TSL’s most competitive division as of late, started slow, and then started to walk all over the division. Keller Whales have been nothing but consistent with Damien Keller at QB. The Wanderers had a rough stretch before getting their groove back. Bullet Club started hot, lost a lot of close games, and finally won last week. LGR is the most talented 2-7 team in history, never having the whole team at one game. Vaspian was making strides before it all came crashing down for them. And 716 never quite fit in with D3. 

#1 The Family (7-2) vs #8 716 (2-7)


Points For: FAM 45.88 (1st), 716 28.56 (7th)

Points Against: FAM 31.88 (3rd), 716 43.22 (8th)

TSL Rank: FAM 4th, 716 43rd

Last 3: FAM 3-0, 716 0-3

Past Games:  53-38 FAM

Line: The Family (-24)

The Family was a new team to the TSL, but it was loaded with talent. They started off 1-2, but rattled off a 6 game winning streak (that they’re still on) where they just can’t stop scoring. In fact, I think they just scored RIGHT NOW somehow. They’re almost unfair. Terrell Bolden is a D1 QB hiding in D3, throwing to one of TSL best ever in Asian Pete (it’s okay he signs his emails to me that way). But then you get Leseaon Washington of Peachy Platoon fame, and budding star Brit Perry? This team is STACKED. 716 was supposed to have B at QB, but apparently Derek Pew took over and despite having some really talented players (Donte Ridgeway, James Celotto, etc) they just can’t get it together. They’ve lost their last 3 while allowing 173 points in those games, and I don’t believe that’s a defense you can just fix in one week. Getting the juggernaut that is The Family just isn’t fair. THE FAMILY BY 28

#2 The Malones (6-3) vs #7 Let’s Get Reccked (2-7)


Points For: Malones 44.22 (2nd), LGR 29.00 (6th)

Points Against: Malones 33.22 (4th), LGR 30.63 (2nd)

TSL Rank: Malones 10th, LGR 39th

Last 3: Malones 3-0, LGR 0-3

Past Games:  47-31 Malones

Line: The Malones (-10)

The Malones would be the absolute talk of the TSL if they weren’t in the same division as The Family, who are SLIGHTLY better. They’ve basically had the same season. The Malones started out 0-3 and then proceeded to go on a 6 game winning streak, where they averaged 47.5 points per game. They’ve done it with two QBs, although Rhace Colon has been really good, running around with his feet and his mouth, giving you old school “Matty Ice” vibes. (It’s a compliment, trust me). They’re highly confident and the biggest thing my informants have told me all season is that their girls are phenomenal. They get an LGR team that’s somehow 2-7 even with the 2nd best D in the league. A team that trots out Dave Baker, Kyle Conniff, and Ricky Recckio every week with Alex Buchlis throwing should be getting more than 2 wins. Of course, getting them there has been an issue. If they all show up, we could be seeing an upset here. But I have to see it to believe it. THE MALONES BY 8

#3 Keller Whales (6-3) vs #6 Vaspian (4-5)


Points For: KW 36.33 (4th), Vaspian 21.00 (8th)

Points Against: KW 34.22 (5th), Vaspian 34.44 (6th)

TSL Rank: KW 15th, Vaspian 29th

Last 3: KW 2-1, Vaspian 0-3

Past Games:  45-30 KW

Line: Keller Whales (-10)

The Keller Whales are just a very consistent team. They win more than they lose, They don’t usually put up huge amounts of points, nor do they allow huge amounts of points either. They’re right in the middle of the standings, offensive rank, and defensive rank too. Damien Keller took the reins at QB and while he has had some growing pains this season, he’s been mostly good. He has his mother and aunt (Nicole and Katie) as a pair of sure handed safety blankets, and he makes good use of Dad, Grandpa (on the sidelines with decades of knowledge) and “Uncle Eric” among others. It's a lovely family affair over here. Vaspian at one point was 4-1 and in first place in D3. Those days seem so long ago for Brian Orzo as attendance issues and drops have done him no favors on this current 4 game losing streak where they’ve been outscored 170-42. Vaspian’s usual shutdown defense hasn’t shown up much this season, and with the offense sputtering, it doesn’t make for a fun time. KELLER WHALES BY 13

#4 Wanderers (5-4) vs #5 Bullet Club (4-5)


Points For: Wanderers 40.44 (3rd), BC 30.00 (5th)

Points Against: Wanderers 36.00 (7th), BC 30.44 (1st)

TSL Rank: Wanderers 24th, BC 26th

Last 3: Wanderers 3-0, BC 1-2

Past Games: 43-34 Wanderers

Line: Wanderers (-4)

Now this is fun. The Wanderers and Bullet Club have had some exciting games the last two seasons, and now they get to do it in the playoffs. These two teams took similar paths to this point. Both started off hot, then lost a bunch of games in a row, and then started winning at the season’s end. These teams match up quite well. Frank Laudico plays QB like no other, and his unique style combined with Sal’s talent really causes some mismatches for the defense. Wanderers always know what to do no matter which 6 of them are on the field, and it's always fun to watch them work. Bullet Club had a few different QBs throw for them this season, but it's John Langley’s job now. He’s using George and Nick very well, and all of the ladies on the team - Steph, Ashley, Jess, Kelsey, and newcomer Lexi all have made great plays throughout the season. The BC defense has been great all year and if Deak is going to return for the playoffs, there’s a lot to like here. This may be the Game of the Day. WANDERERS BY 1



The Contenders:


Cunning Stunts (4-1)

Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (5-1)

Puckett All-Stars (7-1)

Buffalo Vice (7-1)

Passing While Intoxicated (10-1)

Travis Henry’s Kids (12-1)


The Pretenders:


Father Baker (20-1)

TMA (40-1)

The Story: The Stunts were out for blood, crushing everyone they played against for the most part. Meanwhile the 2nd through 6th seeded teams all played each other very closely and they’re all evenly matched. Father Baker struggled with some growing pains in their first season, and TMA had a rough go of it this year. 

#1 Cunning Stunts (9-0) vs #8 TMA (0-9)


Points For: CS 51.00 (1st), TMA 25.67 (8th)

Points Against: CS 32.11 (4th), TMA 45.67 (8th)

TSL Rank: CS 1st, TMA 49th

Last 3: CS 3-0, TMA 0-3

Past Games:  45-22 Stunts, 70-44 Stunts

Line: Cunning Stunts (-22)

An absolute David vs Goliath matchup as the TSL’s highest ranked team gets to play its lowest ranked team. The Stunts have averaged over 50 points a game this season and they’ve never looked better. Joey and his girls have been humming along, and have looked simply unstoppable. The Stunts roster is a who’s who of female talent in the TSL, and they’re just a nightmare for anyone to play against. TMA may have been hastily moved up a division with the addition of Michael Boccio-Bernal, and as a result things couldn’t have gone worse. This isn’t the TMA of old, as many of their top players have moved on. They still have talent, and they still have some of the best people in the TSL on their roster, but unfortunately this season didn’t go their way. CUNNING STUNTS BY 18

#2 Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (6-3) vs #7 Father Baker (2-7)


Points For: ILF 28.78 (7th), FB 34.00 (4th)

Points Against: ILF 23.44 (1st), FB 43.00 (7th)

TSL Rank: ILF 18th, FB 42nd

Last 3: ILF 3-0, FB 1-2

Past Games:  36-18 ILF

Line: Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (-9)

ILF ended up getting into 2nd place in the division by ending the season on a 4 game winning streak. Andrew Kicak’s squad can kinda score some points, but they mostly do their damage on defense, where they were tops in the division by over seven points. They get a good matchup in Father Baker, as the TSL’s newest gender team is still working on defense and getting Dave Baker to even show up for them. Amber Hay, Maddie Norton, Robin Makula, Jessie Kieta, and others form a ridiculously talented roster. They can’t be slept on, but the inconsistency on both sides of the ball (overall defense, whoever the QB is) tells me they’re still a season away. INTERDIMENSIONAL LIGHTNING FALCONS BY 12


#3 Buffalo Vice (5-4) vs #6 Travis Henry’s Kids (4-5)


Points For: Vice 38.11 (2nd), THK 29.78 (6th)

Points Against: Vice 34.11 (6th), THK 32.33 (5th)

TSL Rank: Vice 19th, THK 32nd

Last 3: Vice 1-2, THK 0-3

Past Games:  31-29 THK, 49-41 Vice

Line: Buffalo Vice (-3)

We get ourselves a rubber match here! Vice and THK split the season series in two very close games that could’ve gone either way. The book on Vice has been the same for years: Andy Clark is going to throw bombs to a Gonzalez or Frank Pizza and then he’s going to hit Caitlyn Mason underneath and she’s going to shred people’s ligaments with her jukes. Add in a very talented rest of the roster who have been here before, and you’ve got yourself a tough team to play against. THK took a step forward this season but not exactly as big of a step as they wanted. Langley has been good, and Pistol Pete is always excellent. The knock on THK was always their girls, but after a free agent addition to fix that didn’t work out, the THK females have all stepped up and improved, turning a perceived weakness into a bit of a strength. For whatever reason, THK always turns it up a notch or two in the playoffs. TRAVIS HENRY’S KIDS BY 3

#4 Passing While Intoxicated (5-4) vs #5 Puckett All-Stars (5-4)


Points For: PWI 29.78 (5th), PAS 35.11 (3rd)

Points Against: PWI 30.89 (3rd), PAS 30.67 (2nd)

TSL Rank: PWI 20th, PAS 21st

Last 3: PWI 2-1, PAS 2-1

Past Games:  43-30 PWI

Line: EVEN

PWI and Puckett are two extremely closely matched teams. They’re right next to each other in the TSL rankings, they both have similar defensive rankings, and while PAS has a better offense, PWI also beat them earlier in the season. We’re looking at one of the best games of the day here. Colorado Mike has put together a great team yet again, and their record would probably be even better if not for the consistent absence of QB Buddy Lee. Everyone on this roster is talented, nobody is a weak link. On the other hand, nobody really stands out as a star either. PAS is built the same way. After a couple of seasons putting up video game numbers, Puckett has regressed back into who they’ve been for what feels like the 10 seasons before that. TJ Ferguson has been spotted throwing again, they still have some VERY talented women, I swear once a week someone emails me that “Mike Gelz caught another long one”. The only thing left for Puckett to do as “their old selves” is win D4 as a 5 seed. PUCKETT ALL-STARS BY 7



The Contenders:


Spinelli’s Plumbing (3-1)

Come From Behind (4-1)

GUCCI (4-1)

Creekers (6-1)


The Pretenders:


BAADies (10-1)

Cobblestone (12-1)

Goatsack! (20-1)

Not So Sticky (50-1)

The Story: Spinelli’s didn’t need to drop a division as they’ve proceeded to dunk on everyone like they never left. CFB and GUCCI are once again at the top of the division and looking to avoid a horrible Playoff Saturday, again. The Creekers have some life in them for sure. The rest of the division probably doesn’t have a chance, but it’ll be fun to watch them try. 

#1 Spinelli’s Plumbing (7-2) vs #8 Not So Sticky (0-9)


Points For: SP 41.33 (1st), NSS 20.11 (8th)

Points Against: SP 31.56 (4th), NSS 38.22 (7th)

TSL Rank: SP 6th, NSS 48th

Last 3: SP 3-0, NSS 0-3

Past Games:  26-20 SP

Line: Spinelli’s Plumbing (-20)

Okay Spinelli’s, there was no reason for you to go to D5 you jerks. Tell me if you heard this before: Spinelli’s Plumbing, on the arm strength of Nick Hawes, is a top title contender after averaging over 40 points a game, 5 more than the 2nd place team in the division. Whatever issues they thought they may have after a season off is long gone. They’re terrific, ending the season on a 5 game winning streak and coming in hot. Not So Sticky, Not So Much. While they relish being “giant killers” in D5, this isn’t the year for them. They just feel off, and even their usual fantastic defense isn’t there this season. While they held Spinelli’s to 26 points (one of only two times they were held to under 36 points all year - Creekers held them to 23), that was in Spinelli’s first game of the season in Week 3. They shook the cobwebs out since. SPINELLI’S PLUMBING BY 14

#2 Come From Behind (6-3) vs #7 Cobblestone (3-6)


Points For: CFB 36.11 (2nd), Cobblestone 32.44 (5th)

Points Against: CFB 27.00 (3rd), Cobblestone 34.11 (5th)

TSL Rank: CFB 9th, Cobblestone 38th

Last 3: CFB 2-1, Cobblestone 2-1

Past Games:  20-12 CFB, 46-30 Cobblestone

Line: Come From Behind (-6)

A QB matchup for the ages comes to Playoff Saturday as Paul LoVullo takes on Darryl Carr QB Superstar in a hair vs hair match! Okay, fine, they’re not doing a hair vs hair match but that would be fantastic. Anyway, Come From Behind had another typical CFB season this year. Great offense, very good defense, compete for the regular season title, and maybe lose a game or two they probably shouldn’t have. Paul continues to throw a football harder than people half his age, and all of the younger people make plays for them. Cobblestone really got it together in the second half of the season, and they’ve lost a couple 1 score games. They’re not a typical 7 seed, but CFB already knows that having lost to them not too long ago. This matchup has everything, and should be considered a must watch. COBBLESTONE BY 4

#3 GUCCI (6-3) vs #6 Goatsack! (3-5-1)


Points For: GUCCI 33.11 (4th), Goatsack 29.44 (7th)

Points Against: GUCCI 24.56 (1st), Goatsack 35.22 (6th)

TSL Rank: GUCCI 11th, Goatsack! 34th

Last 3: GUCCI 3-0, Goatsack! 0-3

Past Games:  46-32 GUCCI

Line: GUCCI (-10)

GUCCI returns to the scene of the crime on Playoff Saturday where they were upset as the #1 seed in D5 in the spring. Kelly Kane and Co. have cruised through the season, picking up where they left off. I’m sure they’re much more aware of an upset and won’t look past Goatsack! this year, which is bad news for Goatsack!. Goatsack! had an up and down season that I’m not certain they’re too happy with. 3 wins and a tie are nice, but they were only against NSS (twice), Cobblestone, and they tied the BAADies. Goatsack! is more than likely going to struggle to score against the top ranked GUCCI defense. GUCCI BY 13


#4 Creekers (6-3) vs #5 BAADies (4-4-1)


Points For: Creekers 31.22 (6th), BAADies 34.78 (3rd)

Points Against: Creekers 25.44 (2nd), BAADies 42.44 (8th)

TSL Rank: Creekers 14th, BAADies 25th

Last 3: Creekers 1-2, BAADies 1-2

Past Games:  32-26 BAADies

Line: Creekers (-3)

The Creekers come into this 4-5 matchup a little disappointed. They spent a long time atop the D5 standings before sputtering to the finish line. While their defense is top notch, the Creekers play a BAADies team that’s already beaten them. In fact, the Creekers biggest issue this season has been gender teams (GUCCI counts here because of Kelly), and they haven’t quite figured out how to beat them. With a BAADies team that has a lot of talent that can overcome Garrett at QB, this ends up being the worst possible first round matchup for Mullet Guy and the Creekers. Great band name though. BAADIES BY 7



The Contenders:


Balls Deep (4-1)

Blitzkrieg (4-1)

Pit Harade (4-1)

Sausage McMuffins (4-1)


The Pretenders:


Two Tuddies (8-1)

Mighty Drunks (12-1)

Just Get Open (20-1)


Back That Pass Up: 


Back That Pass Up (100-1)

The Story: Balls Deep goes 7-2 and the league apparently didn’t notice. They’re somehow underrated as a #1 seed. Blitzkrieg, Pit Harade, and the McMuffins all had very good seasons, and any of them wouldn’t surprise as a champion. The Two Tuddies are one of the biggest shockers of the season. A 4-5 record after being considered for D5 isn’t exactly what anyone expected. The Mighty Drunks are incredibly inconsistent. One week they look like world beaters, the next like they’re a brand new team. Just Get Open showed some promise for one week. Back That Pass Up is much more spry than in past seasons, but they’re still a few steps behind to even be considered a long shot for a title. 

#1 Balls Deep (7-2) vs #8 Back That Pass Up (1-8)


Points For: BD 31.11 (4th), BTPU 17.22 (8th)

Points Against: BD 24.11 (2nd), BTPU 34.56 (8th)

TSL Rank: BD 7th, BTPU 47th

Last 3: BD 3-0, BTPU 0-3

Past Games:  36-31 BD

Line: Balls Deep (-10)

Balls Deep comes into the playoffs riding a 4 game win streak that saw them rocket up the standings to claim 1st place. While their offense has been “just okay”, it's their defense that’s really been the story. They’re a bunch of unknowns (seriously, nobody has emailed me about them, that’s on them at this point) other than Baby Gronk, but whatever they’re doing is working. Back That Pass Up finally got their first win, and while they’ve been competitive in some games this year, there’s still a bit of growing pains going on there. Ironically one of those games they were competitive in was against Balls Deep, so maybe the idea of an upset isn’t so farfetched. But I can’t go with it. BALLS DEEP BY 8

#2 Blitzkrieg (6-3) vs #7 Just Get Open (2-7)


Points For: BK 31.44 (3rd), JGO 28.89 (5th)

Points Against: BK 29.67 (5th), JGO 32.89 (7th)

TSL Rank: BK 8th, JGO 41st

Last 3: BK 2-1, JGO 0-3

Past Games:  44-40 BK

Line: Blitzkrieg (-4)

Fall Blitzkrieg finished 2nd in the standings, but their metrics suggest that they’re a little bit more in the middle of the pack. That seems ridiculous, as any team that trots out league darling Light Red Hoodie Guy (and Light Red Hoodie Imposter Guy) should be favored to win the division every year. With that said, they get a Just Get Open team that never quite found their footing this season, other than a magical Week 2 of the season where they went 2-0. They’ve since lost 5 straight games, and they’ve had a few attendance issues that’s made getting on the same page a bit difficult. I think there’s upset alert potential here, but it’s not enough for me to pick it. BLITZKRIEG BY 3

#3 Pit Harade (6-3) vs #6 Mighty Drunks (4-5)


Points For: PH 34.33 (1st), MD 32.89 (2nd)

Points Against: PH 26.67 (3rd), MD 31.78 (6th)

TSL Rank: PH 12th, MD 31st

Last 3: PH 3-0, MD 1-2

Past Games:  52-6 MD

Line: Pit Harade (-8)

In Week 1 of the TSL season back in August, the Mighty Drunks decimated Pit Harade 52-6. Since that week, these two teams have gone in completely different directions. Pit Harade cycled through QBs before finally landing on having Rayanna becoming the starter. She’s averaged 36 points a game since taking over, routinely finding Tall Guy and Fast Guy for chunks of yards. “Fast Guy” is Sam Pezzino who shores up the PH defense as well. Gordon Kus was a welcome addition to the team, and everyone else on the PH roster improved as the season went on. The Drunks, meanwhile, went 2-5 in their last 7 games, and have been incredibly inconsistent. Jill and Kenny’s team have struggled to keep the good times rolling, partially due to attendance issues and partially due to bad play and/or drops. They’re a fast team that, when they’re on, they’re hard to beat, especially when Cam Danner is playing. This should be a close one. PIT HARADE BY 3

#4 Sausage McMuffins (6-3) vs #5 Two Tuddies (4-5)

Points For: SMM 27.89 (6th), TT 24.11 (7th)

Points Against: SMM 21.11 (1st), TT 27.11 (4th)

TSL Rank: SMM 17th, TT 28th

Last 3: SMM 3-0, TT 1-2

Past Games:  20-16 SMM

Line: Sausage McMuffins (-7)

Last year, these two were the favorites to meet in the championship game. Now they’re meeting in a 4-5 matchup after a season of ups and downs. The McMuffins are still a very good team that’s hard to score against. They have the best division in the league by far, as Alex has some really good players in Eric Pochylski and MaKensey Pietz. The problem is on offense, as they struggle to score, despite some very good play from QB Ricky. If they get into a points race, they’ll be in trouble. The Two Tuddies struggled on the season, as the D6 faves could never get it together. They come into the playoffs 1-2, and the one win was a 5 point win over Back That Pass Up, a team that beat them earlier this season. Nick Stutzman is finding his players, but they’re dropping the ball a bit too much. While the Tuddies should have hope they can turn it around, it feels more and more unlikely that it’ll happen. SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS BY 6




  • Do we HAVE to play in the rain? Yes. Unless it becomes too out of hand or there’s lightning, you’ll be playing. 




  • Who are you predicting to win each championship? Right now, It’s hard to go against the Legends, who have seemingly been toying with the rest of D1 all year and are ready to bump it up a notch. In D2, the Freeballers just feel like the only team without any big issues right now. D3 has felt like The Family’s to lose for a while. D4? How does one go against the Cunning Stunts after that season? D5 I feel like Come From Behind can keep up with Spinelli’s, and they have a better defense. Finally in D6 Pit Harade has looked pretty good and with Ray throwing, they can pull this off, GUCCI style. 




  • That’s a lot of chalk. Pick some others that AREN’T so easy. Fine. Eyes Downtown, I believed in you early in the season and I’ll stick with you. The Untouchaballs have been so good for so long. Look out for the Wanderers in D3, they’re on fire right now. In D4? ILF and that defense has me thinking they can do it. I didn’t pick the top seeds in D5/D6 so I’m not doing it again. 




  • What are your best long shots in each division? Sticky Bandits. They’re too good to be only 3-6. If everything clicks in the playoffs, look out. THREAD should be much better than the record they have, and they know how to win in the playoffs. Let’s Get Reccked is a STACKED team with winners. Puckett All-Stars are the 5th seed but they’ve done this time and time again. It sounds crazy, but Cobblestone is playing VERY well and could finally get Darryl that first title. Last but not least, Just Get Open could’ve been playing possum this entire season. If the whole team is there, don’t be surprised if they pull this off. 




  • Which #1 seed is mostly likely to lose (rank them in order of most to least likely), and how many survive Playoff Saturday overall? Oh my. After some thought, this was much harder than I thought. I think it goes Freeballers (Practice Squad is always good in the playoffs), Balls Deep (BTPU only lost by 5 to them), The Family (716 can maybe score?), Spinelli’s Plumbing (NSS might dig into their defensive bag of tricks), Cunning Stunts (Two upsets in a row for TMA?) and Legends (They don’t play). Personally, while I see a lot of 2-3-4 seeds getting upset, I feel like all #1 seeds make it to Championship Saturday next weekend. 





  • Breakfast Club Championship: BDD 45, Steph’s Misty-rious Infection 37. Becca beats Steph, again. 




  • Games of the Day: 
  • 9:00 - Breakfast Club Championship
  • 10:00 - Sticky Bandits vs Frodo Swaggins
  • 11:00 - Wanderers vs Bullet Club
  • 12:00 - Buffalo Vice vs Travis Henry’s Kids
  • 1:00 - Creekers vs BAADies
  • 2:00 - Untouchaballs vs THREAD




  • As always, don’t be a jerk to the refs who are probably going to be getting rained on all day. Reffing is hard to begin with, it's even harder in the rain. 








  • Jeff Krol has informed me that there is a TSL Halloween Costume party at the Rose Garden on Friday, October 27th. Costumes are required. This isn’t the same as the Halloween Bowl, which I’m not sure is happening this year, at least I haven’t been told anyway. 




  • Three teams with the best chance for an upset that I didn’t name earlier: Frodo Swaggins, Scared Hitless, Mighty Drunks




  • The bar has informed me that they’ve loved the league this year and there hasn’t been any trouble. Way to be great, TSL. 




  • Best team with 10-1 odds or more to win the championship: Passing While Intoxicated. 




  • I know it’ll probably be miserable outside, but please remember to park properly, don’t block anyone in, and pick up all of your garbage. Don’t just leave it on the fields in the rain. 




  • One last time: this is everything you and your team has worked for all season. You’ve played and prepared for this moment. Don’t squander it, don’t let your team down. Give it your all. But as always, have fun. 




Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 29 September 2023 17:30
Published: Friday, 29 September 2023 17:30
Written by Jeff Krol
Hits: 396


Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, the Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality is only two weeks away from its elimination rounds. There isn’t much time left for teams to correct what ails them, if it’s fixable at all. With the Rameer Green Memorial Social Co-Ed Football Elimination Race (shortened to “the playoffs”, to make it easier since RGMSCER is really hard to say), to soon be played on the hallowed grounds of the Lenny Alba Fields at the Rose Garden, teams are naturally starting to turn an eye towards the standings as they figure out who their first round opponents are as they attempt to achieve immortality. 


But, I caution them from doing so. In the league’s entire history, the TSL has proven again and again that this is a “What have you done for me lately?” type of place. I’ve said it before, how teams are playing back in August has nothing to do with how they’ll be once September ends. I like that a good chunk of you just sang “Wake Me Up When September Ends” in your head, and if you didn’t then, you just did now. 


Anyway, the entire point is this: the teams that have themselves trending in the right direction RIGHT NOW are the ones that, statistically, end up doing much, much better in the playoffs. Yes, there will always be that team that has looked awful all season pulling an upset or two (we call this the “Practice Squad”) in the playoffs, and a Top Team that looked dominant lose in the first round regardless. It’s the nature of the beast. But, again, the teams that peak at the right time (even if they finish as 3 seed, or a 6 seed, etc) tend to have the most success. So who are they right now? And who’s in trouble as we head into October? 


Naturally, I’ve already done the work for you. If your team isn’t listed, you’re pretty much just in the middle, and can go either way right now. 



Last Week’s Games:


Frodo Swaggins 39, Sticky Bandits 30

Eyes Downtown 43, Sticky Bandits 35

Losing Streak 36, Legends 24

Frodo gets that dynamite first win over Sticky, who would drop to 0-2 on the day with a loss to Eyes Downtown later on. Losing Streak makes their return and they beat the Legends, giving LS a lot of confidence they can win the whole thing. 

Trending Up: 


Frodo Swaggins - It’s hard not to point out that they won their first game last week and they’re coming together as a team. They have 3 more games in the next two weeks to really lock down what they’re doing on the field and be a problem for the top teams in the division. 


Eyes Downtown - It’s hard to argue against them. 6-2, playing well, and everyone seems to be having a great time. 


Losing Streak - They beat the Legends and they look really good in pink and black, giving me strong Bret “Hitman” Hart vibes. 

Trending Down:


Sticky Bandits - They score pretty well, but it’s becoming apparent that they’ve forgotten how to stop anyone. Jeff Krol has once again ignored getting the team on the same page, instead focusing on things like “being a father”, “not fixing the Bills Bus”, and “running the entire league”. It’s no wonder the “Kicak to Eyes Downtown in the Spring” rumors keep getting louder. 


Legends - They’ve lost the last two games, and while I’m sure they’ll be fine, the losses start to make them internally wonder if they really are better off with a QB who’s over 5’3 tall. 

This Week’s Games:


Losing Streak vs Sticky Bandits (+8) - As disjointed as the Sticky Nation looks right now, the reality is that they’re only a game behind LS for the 3rd seed in the division. This game has huge playoff implications, as a Sticky win can draw these two even at 3-4 and put Losing Streak in the 4-5 seed matchup against Frodo. Losing Streak has bigger fish to fry. LOSING STREAK BY 7


Legends vs Sticky Bandits (+10) - Things don’t get easier for Sticky as they get to jump right into a matchup with the Legends. These teams usually have pretty good games against each other, and I expect this one to come down to the wire. LEGENDS BY 3


Losing Streak vs Frodo Swaggins (+8) - Frodo got a little mojo going last week, but Losing Streak is here to erase those good feelings right off the bat. LS is the “forgotten” team in D1 right now, and I’m blowing their under the radar status for them. Sorry Jordan. The talent is undeniable here, and the more they put together good showings, the more I like them to keep Trending up. LOSING STREAK BY 12


Legends vs Frodo Swaggins (+10) - The Frodo vibes are getting better, but the Legends roster is just better. Sure, anything can happen, but it won’t here. LEGENDS BY 10



Last Week’s Games:


Cle-Avengers Assemble 47, Practice Squad 26

THREAD 34, Can’t Touch This 33

Mavericks 30, Cle-Avengers Assemble 21

Practice Squad 40, Mavericks 33

Freeballers 42, Scared Hitless 32


Cle-Ass nearly doubles up the score on Practice Squad, before falling to the Mavericks. PS would go on then to beat the Mavericks, so everyone was 1-1 together. The Freeballers picked up yet another victory over Scared Hitless. And THREAD gets another win, beating Can’t Touch This and they’re starting to heat up, but not enough to make the list. 


Trending Up: 


Freeballers - I think it goes without saying right now, they’re one of the hottest teams in the TSL. They’re on a 5 game winning streak, and SH’s 32 points against them last week was the first time someone scored more than 23 on them during this run. Look out. 


Practice Squad - I don’t care that they’re last in the division, they’re finally getting there. They’re 2-1 in their last 3 games, they have cool jerseys, and they have great people. They won’t catch anyone by surprise this year in the playoffs. 

Trending Down:


Scared Hitless - They knew this was coming. After starting hot out of the gate at 2-0, SH has lost 5 straight, and has looked disorganized. 


Can’t Touch This - The Cinderella story is nearly over, as CTT has dropped their last 2 games. They’re still first in the division, but now that the rest of D2 has film on them, they have to be a little worried about how the playoffs are going to go. 

This Week’s Games:


THREAD vs Cle-Avengers Assemble (+3) - THREAD continues to be on the rise, and they should probably have a better record than they do. Cle-Ass is still a team with excellent parts, but putting it together has been a slight issue. This isn’t the same team that won D2 last year, even if they’re wearing the tie-dye. THREAD BY 3


The Untouchaballs vs Practice Squad (+6) - I’m sorry PS, this one is on me. I didn’t talk about how good Jeremy Burr and the rest of the Untouchaballs are because they aren’t trending up. Why? Because they were already good. They’re not “up”, they’re just “what they always are”. Either way, they’re going to take it as motivation and I expect an email at 2:02pm telling me “Untouchaballs 37 - Practice Squad 14, who’s trending up NOW?”. THE UNTOUCHABALLS BY 23

Mavericks vs Practice Squad (EVEN) - These two teams played a pretty even game last week, and no matter who the loser was they were going to tell themselves “we should’ve won that game”. Mavericks get their win back. MAVERICKS BY 7


Freeballers vs The Untouchaballs (EVEN) - Well, maybe THIS is where I get an email at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. because UT is getting BOTH “Trending UP” teams this week. This is a clash of the titans, and with Can’t Touch This looking like they can now be touched, we’re looking at a meeting of the best two teams in the division. Arguably the best game of the day, and it’s at 3:00, so if you’re sticking around after your game, this is the one to go watch. FREEBALLERS BY 1



Last Week’s Games:


Keller Whales 39, Bullet Club 38

716 27, Vaspian 12

The Family 40, Wanderers 38


A light day of games for D3 that saw the Keller Whales beat Bullet Club for the second straight week. 716 got a nice win over Vaspian to put them on track, and The Family continues to pick off the best teams in D3, sneaking by the Wanderers. 

Trending Up:


The Family - Duh. Since a Week 1 loss to Bullet Club, They’ve gone 5-1, only losing a 4 point game to Vaspian. They’ve averaged about 400 points a game, Terrell Bolden is flying up the QB Rankings charts, and everyone that plays them who’s been in the league longer than 3 years immediately questions how Pete (Asian, not Pistol) can play in the division, even if he’s old now. Give them the title. 

Trending Down:


Bullet Club - After starting 3-0, BC has gone 0-4, and is struggling to pull it out in close games. 


Wanderers - After starting 2-0, the Wanderers have gone 0-4, and are struggling to pull it out in close games (and a few blowouts). 

This Week’s Games:


Keller Whales vs The Malones (EVEN) - The Malones are playing pretty well, and they were a contender for “trending up”, but they’re not quite there, yet. A win here against the Keller Whales (another almost “Trending up” team themselves) should cement them as a team to be taken seriously. This should be a fun matchup. THE MALONES BY 3


Keller Whales vs Vaspian (EVEN) - Another D3 “even” matchup, which isn’t surprising, given the state of D3. The Keller clan has been looking sharp with Damien at QB, and Vaspian has been as well, even with their usual roster issues. Brian is still making it work though, and Vaspian is looking good. But not good enough this time. KELLER WHALES BY 7


Bullet Club vs Wanderers (EVEN) - It’s hard to believe one of these two teams will be on a five game losing streak, but here we are. Well, I guess they could tie. The Wanderers can pin their rough go on Sal being injured, as any team takes a hit losing their best weapon. BC can pin their rough go on the return of John Langley at QB. These two teams always put up great matchups, and I can’t imagine they won’t here. WANDERERS BY 1


The Family vs Let’s Get Reccked (+7) - LGR isn’t quite putting it together this season. That’s not to say they’re bad, it just means that they haven’t done it, yet. Last time these teams met, it was a 62-28 blowout, and I’m not sure LGR has closed that gap enough to take this one. THE FAMILY BY 14


Wanderers vs 716 (+3) - 716 is trying to prove they belong in D3, and it's starting to work. They’ve been better as of late, and they get a Wanderers team that isn’t in sync how you expect. 716 has already beaten the Wanderers, so they know they’re capable of doing it again. I have a feeling the Wanderers get their win back though. WANDERERS BY 7



Last Week’s Games:


Father Baker 36, Buffalo Vice 32

Travis Henry’s Kids 24, TMA 18

Buffalo Vice 49, Travis Henry’s Kids 41

Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 35, Passing While Intoxicated 0

Father Baker gets another victory, this time beating Buffalo Vice, which is a big win for the ladies. THK would beat TMA, before matching up against Vice and losing. And then ILF just decimated PWI, asserting their dominance. Big win for them. 

Trending Up:


Father Baker - The league’s newest gender team is finally figuring things out as they’ve gone 2-1 in their last three games and they’re heating up at the right time. 


Buffalo Vice/Travis Henry’s Kids - They’re both playing very well this season, and they just split the season series. Both teams will be trouble in the playoffs at this rate. 

Trending Down: 


Cunning Stunts - I know what you’re thinking. How on Earth is a 6-0 team that’s brutalizing their opponents trending DOWN? Because, they’ve been 6-0 since September 9th. They haven’t played a game in weeks. That’s no fun for anyone who’s a big fan of gender teams. Get it together. 

This Week’s Games:


Passing While Intoxicated vs TMA (+8) - PWI got smacked around last week, and they were missing players, including QB Buddy Lee. TMA lost a close one to THK, and they’re showing signs of turning the corner, but they’ve yet to have a game where both the defense and the offense clicks, it’s seemingly one or the other each week. PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED BY 7


Buffalo Vice vs Puckett All-Stars (+6) - Vice has been putting up big numbers, and doing Buffalo Vice things all season. PAS isn’t what they’ve been in the recent past, we’ve covered that, but they’re still piecing together a really nice season. They’re 2-3, but they’re lurking, which is what their MO usually is. Upset(ish) of the day. PUCKETT ALL-STARS BY 6


Travis Henry’s Kids vs ILF (EVEN) - Both teams are quite similar, and even with THK having Pistol Pete, ILF can counter with Andrew, which should prove to be an interesting matchup. Of course, Pete has approximately a foot of extra height, so it may not even matter. TRAVIS HENRY’S KIDS BY 2


Cunning Stunts vs Travis Henry’s Kids (+7) - THK upset the Stunts last year, so they know what it takes to beat the ladies on the field. I think both teams will be amped, but my worry for this one is if the Stunts will have any slight rust after 3 weeks of not playing together. Luckily, wanting revenge tends to help with that. CUNNING STUNTS BY 8


Cunning Stunts vs Father Baker (+8) - Last time we saw the Stunts, however, it was in the Gender Bowl as these two teams played to a 53-44 Stunts win that was a lot of fun for those in attendance. With this game at 2:00, I expect another highly watched contest. Father Baker has improved since the last game, but they’re not QUITE there yet. Or are they? CUNNING STUNTS BY 2



Last Week’s Games:


Come From Behind 52, Goatsack! 7

Cobblestone 46, Come From Behind 30

BAADies 32, Creekers 26

GUCCI 46, Not So Sticky 6

GUCCI 44, BAADies 26

Come From Behind gets into the win column in a BIG way over Goatsack! before they get beaten down by Cobblestone. The BAADies get a big win over the Creekers before getting got by GUCCI, who also took down Not So Sticky as they finished their season 6-3 and in the #1 seed (for now) in the division. 

Trending Up:


GUCCI - 3-0 in their last few games to cruise to 6-3, and they’re looking good for the playoffs. 


Cobblestone - You heard it right. 2-1 in their last 3, including a win where they only had 4 people. It’s amazing that after 70 years of football, Darryl can still continue to surprise us. 

Trending Down:


Creekers - Yes, they’re 5-2. But let’s break something down quickly. They’re 5-0 against regular teams but 0-2 against gender teams. Okay, GUCCI isn’t a “gender team” but with Kelly Kane there to chuck TDs, they’re like an honorary one in terms of scoring. The Creekers won’t be able to win D5 without figuring out how to beat a team that always gets 8 point TDs. 

This Week’s Games:


Spinelli’s Plumbing vs Goatsack! (+10) - Spinelli’s has still only played 5 games, but they score points like no other team in the division. I don’t think Goatsack can keep up here. SPINELLI’S PLUMBING BY 17


Come From Behind vs Not So Sticky (EVEN) - I know, EVEN? Realistically, CFB is going to have an easy time with NSS because this isn’t a playoff game. Hopefully, they’ll avoid them when it counts. COME FROM BEHIND BY 12


Creekers vs Goatsack! (+8) - These two teams already met one this season and it was a one score game. Goatsack can run with the Creekers, who are still new, and prone to “new team” mistakes that GS can take advantage of. But, they keep getting better each week. CREEKERS BY 6



Last Week’s Games: 


Pit Harade 38, Back That Pass Up 15

Blitzkrieg 41, Two Tuddies 21

Pit Harade 52, Sausage McMuffins 7

Sausage McMuffins 37, Mighty Drunks 27

Two Tuddies 42, Back That Pass Up 37


Pit Harade got another win over BTPU before shocking the D6 world with a big win over the Sausage McMuffins to go 2-0 on the week. The McMuffins would get a win over the Mighty Drunks to go to 1-1, but Back That Pass Up wouldn’t be as lucky, also losing to the Tud Buds to end up 0-2. The Tuddies would be 1-1 on the day as well, as they lost to Fall Blitzkrieg earlier in the day. 

Trending Up:


Pit Harade - After a bad start to the season, PH is 4-1, scoring the most points in the division, and they’re shutting teams down on defense as well, with the lone exception being Fall Blitzkrieg who’s beaten them twice. 


Balls Deep - BD is also 4-1 in their last 5 games, and they’re on top of the division right now, only losing to PH during this stretch. They’re not getting talked about the way they should be right now. 

Trending Down:


Sausage McMuffins - Uh Oh, is a repeat of the spring on the way? The McMuffins are 1-2 over their last 3 games, and haven’t looked like the team they were in the beginning of the season. I expect them to get it together (the win over the Drunks helps), so I’m not too worried. Hopefully they aren’t either. 


Just Get Open - JGO started the season 0-2, had some excuses for it, showed up and went 2-0, and then haven’t won since. They’re 2-5, and other than the magical Week 2, haven’t shown much else. 

This Week’s Games:


Fall Blitzkrieg vs Just Get Open (+10) - A rare 9:00 game! If Just Get Open is going to show they’re a force in D6, time is running out. Getting a rather large upset win over FBK would be the place to do it, but right now FBK is operating at a pretty nice level and JGO feels out of sorts. FALL BLITZKRIEG BY 8


Balls Deep vs Fall Blitzkrieg (EVEN) - The battle for the #1 overall seed in the division runs through this game specifically. BD has beaten FBK once already this season, but I expect FBK to come back and get a little revenge this time around. FALL BLITZKRIEG BY 7


Balls Deep vs Mighty Drunks (+7) - Balls Deep finishes their season a week early, and they get a battle with the Mighty Drunks to end it. The Drunks have been all over the place all season, and it’s hard to get a read on them. Because of that, and because I don’t think BD goes 0-2 on the day, I’ll give the Balls the edge. BALLS DEEP BY 8


Sausage McMuffins vs Back That Pass Up (+10) - BTPU may not be winning, but they’re playing much more competitively than they have in the past. That means they’re improving, which is a good thing. The McMuffins, however, have to be looking at this one as a “get right” game. SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS BY 8


Mighty Drunks vs Back That Pass Up (+7) - I have no idea what we’re going to get from these teams this week. The Drunks tend to win on athleticism, and this is the perfect spot for that. MIGHTY DRUNKS BY 10


Pit Harade vs Two Tuddies (EVEN) - While Pit Harade has been playing really well, the Tuddies have been a bit all over the place. I’m not exactly sure what’s “wrong” with the Tuddies, but one has to assume they can snap out of this funk eventually. I’ll take the hot team right now, but not by much. PIT HARADE BY 2


Sausage McMuffins vs Two Tuddies (EVEN) - Heck of a matchup between two teams that have shown they can be very, very good, and also confusingly bad at times. Inconsistency is never a good thing, but I think we’re going to get a really good matchup here. TWO TUDDIES BY 2




  • Are the Legends actually in trouble with Joey at QB? They’ve won the last three titles, let’s calm it down a bit with this. But also, yes. 




  • Is running a football league bad for you? It would seem so. Jeff Krol's teams are a combined 2-11 this year, he’s tired all of the time, and he leaves the fields by 1pm every week. Conversely, since giving up control of the TSL, Topper has a Ferrari, is beating the women away from him with a stick, is on the cusp of the most anticipated comeback in TSL history, and rumor has it his hair has returned. You be the judge. 




  •  What “Trending Down” teams do you expect to ‘turn it around’? I’m not counting the Stunts in this, because of course they’ll be fine. I think the real answer is Scared Hitless. They’ve been losing games, but they’re still playing well. They’re a battle tested bunch, and they’re a play or two away from having a couple more wins. 




  • Can you crown any division champions yet? I can’t imagine The Family losing in D3. They’re just too complete in every facet of the game: Offense, Defense, Males, Females, QB. And some of them are still learning the game! Every other division feels up in the air a little bit still. 




  • What are the bar specials this week? I believe that there is an Oktoberfest sampling from 2-4 this week, and there may be beer steins involved? Sounds like a pretty good time. 





  • Breakfast Club Predictions: 
  • BDD 47, Blachuranus 30
  • The Dirty Dozen 45, Steph Infection 42




  • Games of the Day:
  • 9:00 - Blitzkrieg vs Just Get Open
  • 10:00 - Buffalo Vice vs Puckett All-Stars
  • 11:00 - Legends vs Sticky Bandits
  • 12:00 - ILF vs THK
  • 1:00 - Pit Harade vs Two Tuddies
  • 2:00 - Cunning Stunts vs Father Baker
  • 3:00 - Freeballers vs The Untouchaballs




  • Global Warming continues to be the MVP of the season, as my Weather Channel app tells me it’ll be 76 degrees and sunny in Buffalo on Saturday. 




  • The TSL podcast was a good listen with Bobby McConnell this week, I didn’t see if there was a new episode of The Roost this week or not yet. The TSL media has been really good all over this season. 




  • THE TSL BANQUET IS FRIDAY, DECEMBER 8TH. I’ll repeat this every week so people can’t say “oh man I didn’t know”. 




  • Awesome work by the couple on Back That Pass Up that adopted one of the dogs from Dog Day a few weeks ago! 




  • This season, across the board, feels like one of the most wide open seasons in recent history, and it’s made for some excellent football. The Playoffs are going to be nuts. 




  • One thing that’s been in my email inbox lately has been TSLers talking about how great the new staff has been at the Rose Garden to us. It’s good to hear after many seasons of hearing complaints. 




  • I was informed that a group of TSLers are considering getting a big group from the league to go to Miami for the Bills vs Dolphins game in January. I was told the Freeballers were heading this idea, so if you’re interested, reach out to one of them. 




  • I’ll repeat: be cool to the refs. Things have indeed been better, but now that we’re closer to the games having higher stakes, I want to reiterate that you’ll only hurt your team by being a jerk and getting kicked out. 


Good luck in Week 7. 




Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 06 October 2023 14:12
Published: Friday, 06 October 2023 14:12
Written by Jeff Krol
Hits: 389

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL universe, the Race for Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality is reaching the end of its preseason and we’re approaching the single elimination tournaments that will award the survivors with absolute glory. So here we are in Week 8, the final week of the regular season. For some teams, this is a bye week, having already played all 9 of their games (9 teams). For others, they have a double header because some early bye weeks only have them with 7 games played (11 teams). 


It all adds up to a wild Week 8 that’s going to determine some seeding scenarios in every single division. Only two of our six divisions have 1st overall seeds set in stone  - D4 (The Stunts are 8-0, with a 3 game lead on their closest competitors) and D6 (Balls Deep finished 7-2, every other team in the division has at least 3 losses). 


Does seeding actually matter? Yes and no. Yes because it’s nice to say you’re the division champions after 9 grueling games. It’s harder to win a division than you might think it is. A lot has to go right every single game for that to happen. Also, for some divisions, there’s a pretty clear line between the “haves” and the “have nots” at some point, and finishing first usually means you’re going to catch a team that’s still having a terrible year with terrible luck, which is much better than playing a team that might have a 5-4 record, but a few plays during the season could’ve made them 7-2. 


And of course, no, seeding doesn’t matter, because the TSL playoffs are historically bananas, upsets happen all of the time, and nothing ever makes sense. 


But to a lot of people, seeding is everything. They want to be as high as possible to play the “worst” team they possibly can. And because some of these divisions are INCREDIBLY close, Week 8 is going to be a blast for the league to watch. 


As for tiebreakers, it’s pretty simple. If two teams are tied, we go with the head to head. If they played twice and split? It goes to point differential. We know that much. But if 3 teams are tied? 4 teams? We have no idea. Please remember that I’ve described this system in the past as “Topper punches the numbers into the magical standings machine and it spits out the seeds and matchups based on a lot of stuff I don’t understand.”. Today, it’s the same thing, except Jeff Krol is punching the numbers in. So if you’re tied with multiple teams, you’ll see on Sunday where you ended up. Don’t ask, nobody will know. 


So let’s take a sort of in depth look at where teams stand and what’s on the line for this Saturday for each division: 



Last Week’s Games: 


Sticky Bandits 33, Losing Streak 14

Legends 52, Sticky Bandits 26

Losing Streak 52, Frodo Swaggins 18

Legends 61, Frodo Swaggins 24

Sticky Bandits get a nice win over Losing Streak to kick off the day, before getting doubled up on by the Legends. LS would go on to dominate Frodo, Legends would go on to dominate Frodo. Sorry Frodo. 

What’s On The Line: 


Legends - They’re 6-2, they clinch 1st with a win. 


Eyes Downtown - They’re 6-2, they can’t go lower than 2nd, they clinch 1st with a win, and a Legends loss. 


Losing Streak - A win gets them a 3rd place finish. 


Sticky Bandits - A win and a Losing Streak loss gets them 3rd place, pushing LS into the 4-5 game. 


Frodo Swaggins - They’re finishing 5th. 

This Week’s Games:


Sticky Bandits vs Frodo Swaggins (+10) - A very important game for Sticky, as I’m sure they’d like to avoid the extra playoff game. Frodo is playing for pride at this point, but getting a 2nd win and repeat playoff game against a team they just beat the week before could rally them to a win here. It doesn’t. STICKY BANDITS BY 12


Eyes Downtown vs Frodo Swaggins (+14) - Frodo gets a weird “10th” game but they get it against Eyes Downtown, which isn’t exactly a picnic. Bobby’s team knows that a win here places the pressure on the Legends, so they’ll be going all out to take this one. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 17


Legends vs Losing Streak (+10) - The Legends will know by start time if this game means anything for them. Of course, they might just want to make Losing Streak potentially play in the 4-5 game anyway, which might be all they need to get them motivated. LEGENDS BY 7



Last Week’s Games:


Cle-Avengers Assemble 37, THREAD 28

The Untouchaballs 39, Practice Squad 0

Mavericks 58, Practice Squad 26

The Untouchaballs 37, Freeballers 14


Cle-Ass started off the D2 slate with a hard fought win over THREAD. The Untouchballs shut out Practice Squad before dominating the Freeballers to go to 2-0 on the day. The Mavericks scored a bunch of points on PS en route to a victory as well. 

What’s On The Line:


Can’t Touch This, The Untouchaballs, Freeballers - These three teams have a shot at 1st overall in the division. If CTT wins, they get it over a tie with UT, but lose it in a tie with Freeballers. If they lose, UT wins, and Freeballers lose a game, UT gets it. If CTT loses, UT loses, Freeballers win both? Freeballers take first. And they could all end up tied at 7-2 or 6-3, and then it comes down to the craziness of the Topper Machine. I think. 


Mavericks - Sitting at 4-4, a win should keep them in 4th. A loss and two wins by Cle-Ass, or a win by THREAD, or two wins by Scared Hitless and they’re getting pulled down into…


Cle-Avengers Assemble, THREAD, Scared Hitless - All of these teams can tie and shuffle positions and with Cle-Ass winning over UT and FB, THREAD beating CTT, and SH beating Mavericks and FB they’d all be 4-5, and into the Topper Machine they’d go. I’d love to see how a 4 way tie between them all shakes out. 


Practice Squad - I believe that at 2-7, PS is locked into 8th place. 

This Week’s Games:


Mavericks vs Scared Hitless (+10) - I don’t think Jordan and company want to mess around this game. They just want to play their game, get a win, and prepare for the playoffs against a team that isn’t one of the “Big 3” for the first week. MAVERICKS BY 14


The Untouchaballs vs Cle-Avengers Assemble (+7) - Jeremy Burr and Co have a chance at the #1 seed, and they still have a bad taste in their mouths from losing to Travis’ old team in D2 last season. They’ll be out to send a message. THE UNTOUCHABALLS BY 13


Can’t Touch This vs THREAD (+3) - THREAD just pulled out a 1 point win against CTT the last time these two played. THREAD has been the hotter team as of late, and CTT isn’t the same team that was running through D2 earlier this year. THREAD BY 2


Freeballers vs Scared Hitless (+10) - Freeballers may have just looked “not great” against the Untouchaballs, but that doesn’t mean they’re not one of the Top D2 teams right now. I expect them, with a shot at first place on the line, to bring their best this week. FREEBALLERS BY 15


Freeballers vs Cle-Avengers Assemble (+8) - This could be a slug fest between two talented teams, but by this point only one should have something to play for. FREEBALLERS BY 10



Last Week’s Games: 


The Malones 53, Keller Whales 30

Keller Whales 45, Vaspian 30

Wanderers 43, Bullet Club 34

The Family 21, Let’s Get Reccked 0 (forfeit)

Wanderers 70, 716 8

The Malones put up a ton of points yet again, this time against the Keller Whales. The Kellers would shake it off and get a nice win over Vaspian to go to 1-1 on the day. The Wanderers broke their losing streak against Bullet Club, extending BC’s losing streak to 5 games before putting up an impressive 70 points against a very overmatched 716 team. LGR realized the only way to hold The Family to under 50 points is to forfeit, and they did just that. 

What’s On The Line:


The Family - Win and they’re 1st. Easy. If they lose…


Chaos. Keller Whales, The Malones, Vaspian - KW can tie The Family with a win then. While KW won’t win the tiebreaker of the two of them, Vaspian can make it a three way dance with a win over The Malones. If the Malones win, however, they can make it a three way tie with a win over 716. Then it’s up to the Topper Machine. 


Wanderers - If they win, they’re looking at the 3rd/4th seed. If they lose….


More Chaos. Let’s Get Reccked, 716, Bullet Club - Wanderers drop to 4-5 with the loss to LGR, which means we can have a different three way tie with Wanderers, 716 (if they win both games) and the winner of LGR/Bullet Club. (The loser of LGR/BC ends up in 8th in this scenario). 

This Week’s Games:


The Family vs Vaspian (+6) - I didn’t give Vaspian a chance to beat The Family earlier in the season and I was wrong. Since then, The Family has formed into a complete juggernaut and the hottest team in the TSL. While a Family loss leads to more chaos, it's hard to bet against them. THE FAMILY BY 10


Bullet Club vs Let’s Get Reccked (EVEN) - The teams have played in some form a bunch of times and it tends to be close. A loss here, as I said before, gives the potential for either team to play The Family, which nobody wants to do right now. I expect this to be down to the wire, Bullet Club loses another close one. LETS GET RECCKED BY 2


Wanderers vs Let’s Get Reccked (EVEN) - LGR won this game 57-14 when the Wanderers were in that rough stretch. If anyone was paying attention last week, they’re back, and I’m sure they’ll be looking for revenge from the earlier loss. WANDERERS BY 3


The Malones vs 716 (+14) - The Malones continue to be the best team nobody is talking about in the TSL. They’re fast, they score, they have extremely talented females, they have a little bit of swagger too. Also, they drink at the bar so that’s a plus. They have a decent shot at the top seed, and that should be all they need to keep it rolling. THE MALONES BY 18


Keller Whales vs 716 (+10) - 716 has some talent, but they’re just slightly behind the rest of the division, and its caused them some tough losses this season. Keller Whales continue to just be consistent year in and year out, no matter which Keller throws for them. They’ll continue to roll. KELLER WHALES BY 10


The Malones vs Vaspian (+7) - This game could have big meaning for seeding, so both teams are going to bring their best. Right now, I think The Malones “best” is better. THE MALONES BY 12



Last Week’s Games:


Passing While Intoxicated 50, TMA 16

Puckett All-Stars 32, Buffalo Vice 24

Puckett All-Stars 30, TMA 7

Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 31, Travis Henry’s Kids 20

Cunning Stunts 51, Travis Henry’s Kids 32

Cunning Stunts 56, Father Baker 36


PWI gets back in the win column with a win over TMA, who would go on to lose to Puckett as well. Puckett would also win against Buffalo Vice to be 2-0 on the day. ILF handled THK, who would go on to lose to the Stunts afterwards. The Stunts moved to 8-0 with a win over Father Baker in another gender bowl. 

What’s On The Line: 


Cunning Stunts - 8-0 right now, clinched 1st overall. 


Seeds 2-6 are nuts. Buffalo Vice, ILF, PWI, Puckett, and THK - Vice is already 5-4 and they’re done this season. Here’s the most fun scenario: If THK beats PWI, PWI beats ILF, ILF beats Puckett, and Puckett beats Father Baker (All completely plausible) we’d have FIVE teams tied at 5-4 for the 2nd seed. Chaos please. There’s a lot of different outcomes that could happen here, and it’s a fool’s errand to try to go through them all for you, so let’s just hope for this result. 


Father Baker - Clinched the 7 seed. 


TMA - Clinched the 8 seed. 

This Week’s Games: 


Passing While Intoxicated vs Travis Henry’s Kids (+6) - This is a big game for THK, obviously, and PWI has been very good when Buddy Lee shows up to QB. Whether he will or not remains the question. TRAVIS HENRY’S KIDS BY 3


PWI vs ILF (EVEN) - Yeah, yeah, ILF dominated PWI a few weeks ago, I know. But PWI wasn’t exactly at full strength. ILF has been better than their record shows to be honest, and usually those teams win. But I really want the 5 way tie, so, PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED BY 8


Cunning Stunts vs TMA (+20) - Don’t watch. It won’t be pretty. CUNNING STUNTS BY 17


ILF vs Puckett All-Stars (EVEN) - Puckett definitely has been good as of late, but ILF will be reeling from letting one slip away earlier, so INTERDIMENSIONAL LIGHTNING FALCONS BY 1


Puckett All-Stars vs Father Baker (+8) - Puckett takes a page out of ILF’s book from the game before and they get it together for game two. PUCKETT ALL-STARS BY 12



Last Week’s Games:


Spinelli’s Plumbing 36, Goatsack! 24

Come From Behind 28, Not So Sticky 17

Creekers 38, Goatsack! 20

Spinelli’s Plumbing 40, Cobblestone 34


Spinelli’s Plumbing beat Goatsack before going 2-0 on the day in a win over Cobblestone as well. Goatsack took the loss and made it 0-2 dropping one to the Creekers. Come From Behind beat Not So Sticky, who are lulling them into a false sense of security for the playoffs. 

What’s On The Line: 


Come From Behind, GUCCI - Both of these teams are done with the season at 6-3, but their seeding isn’t guaranteed yet. 


Creekers - With a win, Creekers win the division. With a loss, if Spinelli’s wins again, Creekers are 4th. 


Spinelli’s Plumbing - However, if Spinelli’s beats the Creekers but chokes against the BAADies, we’ll have CFB, GUCCI, Creekers, and Spinelli’s all at 6-3 and who the hell knows what will come of that mess. For Spinelli’s, if they win both, they’re 7-2 and they get Not So Sticky in the first round. This season, that’s a good thing, unless you’re CFB. 


BAADies - The tie with Goatsack! means that can only, at best, move up to 4, and they’d be locked into a rematch with Spinelli’s, who would have to go 0-2 for BAADies to move up. They can’t move down. 


Goatsack! - Goatsack! had that tie I mentioned which means at 3-5-1 they’re locked into the 6th seed. 


Cobblestone - playing very well as of late, but can’t get out of the 7th seed. 


Not So Sticky - They’ve been locked into the 8th seed since August. Kidding, but they can’t get out of the basement even with a win over Cobblestone this week. 

This Week’s Games:


Cobblestone vs Not So Sticky (+7) - NSS is in the midst of their worst season that they’ve had in a while. That doesn’t mean they don’t have talent, but they’re maybe having too many (or not enough?) Huggie Bombs this year. Cobblestone has found something that works the last couple of weeks, and I think they’ll keep it rolling. COBBLESTONE BY 12


Creekers vs Spinelli’s Plumbing (EVEN) - The Creekers held Spinelli’s to 23 points a couple of weeks ago, so they’re able to stop this offense. This game is HUGE for D5, as the winner will be the #1 seed (if Spinelli’s wins against the BAADies anyway). I can’t imagine Creekers hold Spinelli’s offense back twice in one season, it’s just very hard to do. SPINELLI’S PLUMBING BY 6


Spinelli’s Plumbing vs BAADies (+7) - The BAADies beat Spinelli’s by 5 back in Week 3 this season, in a 57-52 shootout. I expect another shootout, but this time it’s going to go the other way. SPINELLI’S PLUMBING BY 5



Last Week’s Games:


Balls Deep 29, Blitzkrieg 20

Balls Deep 41, Mighty Drunks 35

Sausage McMuffins 29, Back That Pass Up 8

Mighty Drunks 25, Back That Pass Up 21

Pit Harade 36, Two Tuddies 15

Sausage McMuffins 20, Two Tuddies 15


Balls Deep ended their season strong, going 2-0 on the day to move to 7-2 with wins over Fall Blitzkrieg and the Mighty Drunks. The Drunks would go to 1-1 on the day as they squeaked by Back That Pass Up. BTPU would fall to 0-2 on the day when they lost to the McMuffins, who would move to 1-1 themselves with a win over the Two Tuddies. The Tuddies were 0-2 on the day, as they also lost to Pit Harade earlier on. 

What’s On The Line:


Balls Deep - Clinched 1st overall with a 7-2 record. 


Sausage McMuffins, Blitzkrieg, Pit Harade - These teams could end up in a three way tie for 2nd with 6-3 records. The McMuffins are already 6-3, Blitzkrieg plays the 1-7 Back That Pass Up, and Pit Harade plays the 2-6 Just Get Open. That kind of shows a 3 way tie seems probable, which means it won’t happen. The McMuffins lose the tiebreaker with both BK and PH. If all three teams tie, I think it goes BK - PH - McMuffins, but again, the Topper Machine, anything can happen then. 


Two Tuddies - locked into the 5th seed


Mighty Drunks - locked into the 6th seed


Just Get Open - locked into the 7th seed


Back That Pass Up - locked into the 8th seed, will play Balls Deep in Round 1. 

This Week’s Games:


Pit Harade vs Just Get Open (+7) - Just Get Open is 2-6 and they had one really good week. After that they’ve been looking for players and seemingly scrambling along. Pit Harade is 5-1 in their last 6 games, and they’ve been scoring in bunches. That’s only helped along by putting Rayanna back behind center last week, and she was apparently slinging it, beating the Tud Buds by 21. Give me the team that’s been much hotter. PIT HARADE BY 10


Blitzkrieg vs Back That Pass Up (+12) - BTPU has been playing very well on defense, and they’re starting to get it together on offense. It hasn’t translated to wins yet, but they’re much closer to one than they ever have been. Fall Blitzkrieg is cruising along, even though their record is only 5-3. It probably should be better than that. With 2nd in the division right there for the taking, they’ll be very focused. BLITZKRIEG BY 17




  • Breakfast Club Playoffs already? What happened this season? Breakfast Club looked to be pretty evenly matched for the most part. Becca/Ashley’s team ended up 5-1, playing slightly better defense/offense than the other 3 teams. Steph/Misty and MacKenzie’s teams went 3-3, although both teams played each other (and BDD) pretty close. Jenna’s team went 1-5, but they were two plays away from two more wins. All in all, a mostly even BC. 




  • After going over the divisions now that the season is just about over, which teams should move up/move down a division for the Spring 2024 season? This is a good question, and it's one that’s hard to answer because we don’t know what teams will be coming back, what new teams we’ll have, who these teams may add. Let’s assume that every team is coming back with the same rosters, and no new teams are being added. In D1, if Frodo wanted to drop down I’d understand, but I’d like them to continue to improve in D1 myself. In D2, The Untouchaballs SHOULD move to D1, but because some players already have D1 teams, they never will and that’s a shame. I also think Practice Squad could go back to D3, but they’re another team that’s just starting to win and figure it out. In D3, The Family is going up no matter what, they’re too good, and when you average 45 points a game, yeah. 716 hasn’t looked quite right this whole season, and perhaps D4 is more suited for them. In a perfect world, the Stunts win D4 and come to D3. The Angels did it, now it’s their turn. They win ALL THE TIME in the regular season, and some are thinking they purposely lose in the playoffs to not have to move up. I THINK they only lose Katie Keller going to D3, which is a big loss, but I feel they can sweet talk someone talented to take her spot. It’ll be fun seeing them join that division. Unless Joey is scared. We know the girls aren’t. And then TMA, yeah, the powers that be were just wrong about how much of a difference Boccio makes. This season should be proof that you’re D5 even with him, unless all of your really tall guys come back. In D5, nobody stands out as a “must move up”, except for Spinelli’s, mainly because they just played in D4, and taking the season off last Spring didn’t hurt them as much as they thought. Some may think Not So Sticky should move down, but don’t forget they just ran roughshod over D6 not too long ago. I heard someone say on the podcast that they’re basically a “D5.5” team, so it’s tough. As for D6, I don’t think anyone is a “must move up no matter what”. I wouldn’t be surprised if the champs stayed down. 




  • Shouldn’t there be more incentive to win your own division? What kind of reasonable perks could there be with that? I always get this question and I’m never sure what we really could do for this that won’t give a team a huge advantage. Perhaps something like you get to pick your field for the first playoff game could be in play. Usually the schedule has an entire division play at once, so if you prefer field 2, you can have that field? I don’t really know what else could be done. Maybe a bar tab that can only be used on Playoff Saturday? If you have ideas, email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. and I’ll pass your ideas along. 




  • I keep seeing that I shouldn’t miss “The TSL Banquet” on Friday, December 8th. But, what is it? The TSL Banquet is a wedding without the wedding. Everyone dresses up, we have an open bar, we give out awards, we have cool DJs, and we drink and dance the night away. It’s the best party of the year, lots of TSLers get hotel rooms and end up staying out much later the next day. It’s a ton of fun, and you should be there. 




  • Awards? How do I win an award? Well, you’ll have to be nominated for one! We give out awards for a LOT of different things for each division. How do you get nominated? Usually, the captains are given a google form to fill out for nominees, but since a lot of captains can’t be bothered, word is that Jeff Krol is opening it up to the public to vote on nominees, and he should be sending that out soon. 





  • Breakfast Club Playoff Predictions: 
  • BDD 51, Blachuranus 30
  • Steph’s Mistyrious Infection 42, The Dirty Dozen 33




  • I think after too many people pointed out how great the weather has been all season for the TSL, Mother Nature caught on. My Weather Channel App is telling me that there may be a little bit of rain on Saturday and the temperature is dropping into the 50s. Football weather, right? 




  • Games of the Day: 
  • 9:00 - Breakfast Club Playoffs! 
  • 10:00 - Cle-Avengers Assemble vs The Untouchaballs
  • 11:00 - Can’t Touch This vs THREAD
  • 12:00 - ILF vs PWI
  • 1:00 - Creekers vs Spinelli’s Plumbing
  • 2:00 - Let’s Get Reccked vs Wanderers
  • 3:00 - Legends vs Losing Streak




  • Yes, the TSL Winter Session is coming. More details will be coming soon enough. 




  • I heard on both podcasts the idea of the refs keeping track of the players that score TDs, and I think that’s a fun idea. However, it could lead to people worried way too much about stats. Pros and cons. 




  • I wonder if the TSL Hall of Fame will ever happen or if it’s just a myth? 




  • Three teams being criminally ignored this season: Balls Deep, The Malones, and Puckett All-Stars. 




  • As if the weather maybe affecting the games isn’t enough, I just remembered that Fall Fest is this weekend in WNY. Historically that means a lot of people will be missing games, or leaving ASAP so they can see Topper and stand packed in like sardines at Balloons to get one drink every 4 hours. Ah, the memories. I should’ve come to town for this. 




  • I do enjoy that heading into the last weekend of the season, we only have TWO of the 21 Playoff Saturday matchups set: Cunning Stunts vs TMA and Balls Deep vs Back That Pass Up. 




  • With playoffs coming, and the games starting to mean a little bit more, I’ll say again that you need to keep your cool with the refs, the opponents, and even your own teammates. Don’t do anything stupid that can hurt your team’s dreams of Social Co-Ed Football Immortality that everyone has been working towards all season. 




Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 22 September 2023 13:56
Published: Friday, 22 September 2023 13:56
Written by Jeff Krol
Hits: 396

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, only THREE (3) weeks of regular season TSL football remain until the Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality begins its elimination rounds. (That’s the playoffs, for anyone that’s confused.) At this point in the season, now that teams have played at least half of their schedules, we’ve come to the point where we pretty much know what teams are this season. And for the four teams that have only played 4 games so far this season, we kind of know what they are anyway - Sticky Bandits have been the same for years, Back That Pass Up needs a bunch of work, Cle-Avengers Assemble have too much talent to not figure it out, and Travis Henry’s Kids….well, okay, we know what three of the four are for sure. 


The point is, teams have rounded into form this season, and we shouldn’t have any perceived “GOOD” and “NOT GOOD” teams magically switch their designations over the next three weeks. Right? Wrong. This is the TSL where everything is made up and the regular season doesn’t matter. Today’s “NOT GOOD” team is tomorrow’s 7 seed upset over a “sure thing”, Today’s “GOOD” team can start 6-0 before going 6-3 and losing in the first round of the playoffs (as the collective butt holes of Can’t Touch This and the Cunning Stunts pucker up, nervous this could be them). 


Hell, the arguably top “GOOD” team, the Legends, haven’t even started their three time defending champion, Joey Batts, at QB once this season. They can get even better. Sorry D1. So yeah, maybe you’re sitting on a “NOT GOOD” team right now - perhaps you’re Not That Sticky, or you’re a 716er, or you’ve lost your Swaggins, or your Squad needs some Practice, or your signing of Boccio is going about as well as when the Bills signed Terrell Owens - but that doesn’t mean all is lost. You still have time to get it together, it’s just going to take some work. 


Remember once again, Today’s “NOT GOOD” teams are October’s biggest storylines. 




  • Eyes Downtown finally beat the Legends!
  • The Freeballers are finally beating the hell out of opponents instead of each other.
  • Untouchaballs are still awesome, D2 playoffs looking to rock.
  • Vaspian is on top of D3 and it isn’t a Topper Typo. I think. 
  • The Family is absolutely slaughtering D3, looking to jump to D1 asap. 
  • Travis Henry’s Kids might be good finally? 
  • Passing While Intoxicated continues to rally after weak start
  • Father Baker wins! 
  • Creekers still awesome, claim they didn’t even play last season
  • 6 of 8 teams over .500 in D5, bloodbath on the way
  • Balls Deep beats the McMuffins, claims the Croissan’wich is the superior breakfast food
  • Two Tuddies figured out football again





  • Sticky Bandits find themselves in the middle of everything in D1, only 2-2
  • Jordan Lawson teams combined 4-6, but people enjoy playing for him so it's fine
  • Practice Squad wins in D2, finally! 
  • The Malones continue to win, but might be jerks, more info needed
  • Puckett continues to compete, but are no longer the supercharged team of the past
  • Blitzkrieg goes 1-1 without half their team, still treading water in D6





  • Frodo Swaggins hasn’t played in weeks, league fears they folded
  • BAADies hasn’t played in weeks, league fears they folded
  • Can’t Touch This gets humbled, finally loses
  • Bullet Club, Let’s Get Reccked, Wanderers proceed to go 0-5 last week
  • ILF goes 0-2, gets slapped around by D4 contenders, Becca to blame
  • Not So Sticky loses to Cobblestone who allegedly only played with 4 people
  • Again, NSS lost to a team with 4 people
  • Just Get Open bad again, meaning they’ll win the next 2 by large margins


And with that, let’s get into this week’s games. 



Last Week’s Games:


Legends 31, Sticky Bandits 30

Eyes Downtown 27, Legends 13


A boring day of D1 action. Andy Smigiera (the guy who killed TEIM and started the free agent frenzy this offseason) gets to throw for Legends this week and could only muster a 1 point win over Sticky and a loss to Eyes Downtown, putting him firmly in 5th place on the Legends QB Rankings. The Top 5, in order, are: Sean, Joey, Maddie, Travis, Andy for those curious. 

This Week’s Games:


Sticky Bandits vs Frodo Swaggins (+8) - Sticky is 2-2 but it’s not like they’re playing bad at all. A bit of the forgotten D1 team, they’re getting a Frodo squad that hasn’t played in a minute. Good timing. STICKY BANDITS BY 13


Eyes Downtown vs Sticky Bandits (+6) - I know Sticky is feeling disrespected a bit, but it’s become a bit of a “prove it first” thing here. The 2 wins are against Frodo and Losing Streak. They need a win over Legends or ED to be taken seriously. They’ll still be looking for it. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 7


Legends vs Losing Streak (+8) - Losing Streak feels like they haven’t played in forever, but it's only been two weeks. I know Jordan has been watching game tape of the first five games like a hawk, and now it's time to start implementing the necessary adjustments. I don’t know who will be the QB for the Legends, but they’re really just out to have fun all regular season and then do their thing in the playoffs. I can’t imagine they lose two in a row though. LEGENDS BY 6



Last Week’s Games:


Practice Squad 30, THREAD 29

The Untouchaballs 33, Scared Hitless 28

Freeballers 52, Cle-Avengers Assemble 23

Can’t Touch This 25, Scared Hitless 22

Freeballers 58, Can’t Touch This 18


PRACTICE SQUAD WINS! That’s all that needs to really be said here. They worked hard, and they got a victory, finally. The Untouchaballs are the usual, winning games. Scared Hitless went 0-2, but they really showed up in both of their games against UT and CTT. Speaking of Can’t Touch This, they’ve been touched. Freeballers embarrassed them by 40 points and for the first time all season, they looked like a D3 team that just moved up. The Freeballers also beat the defending D2 champs (even if they’re a mostly different roster) by 30 to stake that claim at a D2 title contender. 

This Week’s Games:


Practice Squad vs Cle-Avengers Assemble (EVEN) - Two teams on semi-even footing here. They’re a combined 2-7, and both aren’t exactly having the seasons they envisioned. PS has to be energized - they got a win and from what I’m hearing they have really cool new jerseys. Those are things to be happy about. Cle-Ass is on the struggle bus a bit, but they also haven’t played a ton, which is all Travis’ fault. Look for the Avengers to assemble. Cle-Avengers Assemble by 1


Can’t Touch This vs THREAD (+7) - CTT got smacked around last week, but it was bound to happen. They were outperforming their metrics and they couldn’t have possibly been THAT good, right? THREAD, meanwhile, is underperforming. The loss to PS last week on the last play of the game stung, but it may have been the wake up call they needed. They’ve had two one point losses already this season and could EASILY be 4-2 and the talk of the town. After all of the publicity CTT has gotten all year, and too many mentions of “rust” on THREAD, they show up and remind everyone just who they are. THREAD BY 8


Mavericks vs Cle-Avengers Assemble (+4) - The Mavericks got a bye week at the right time, as they were the victims of the Freeballers “coming out” party. A week off to rest and reset is probably just what the doctor ordered. This team has too many talented (and tall) people, and they’re communicating on defense much better than before. Look for things to have been cleaned up here. MAVERICKS BY 3


Mavericks vs Practice Squad (+10) - Same thing here. Mavs are just too talented for PS. MAVERICKS BY 8


Freeballers vs Scared Hitless (+10) - There is currently no stopping the Freeballers it seems. I don’t know how this happened. The Freeballers have been so up and down and down some more over the years that I don’t know what to think anymore. Every single time in the past that they’ve gotten me to believe in them, they go out and lay a giant egg. They’re the ex-boyfriend who SWEARS they’ve changed and then before you know it they’re texting “Domino’s” at 3am for some reason. It doesn’t matter. I’m ready to be hurt again. FREEBALLERS BY 18



Last Week’s Games:


Keller Whales 30, Bullet Club 19

Vaspian 39, Bullet Club 29

The Malones 47, Let’s Get Reccked 31

Vaspian 40, Wanderers 33

The Family 62, Let’s Get Reccked 28

The Malones 27, 716 23


The Keller Whales continue to be a very solid team that plays smart football, and they got the better of Bullet Club last week. BC proceeded to follow that up with a loss to Vaspian, making them 0-2 on the day with Langley at QB. (This fulfills my contractual agreement with Topper to poke at Langley at least once an article.) More importantly, VASPIAN I SEE YOU. Vaspian dropped 79 points in games against BC and Wanderers and they sit atop the D3 standings. That’s exciting. The Family put up massive points yet again, dropping 62 on LGR who would also lose to The Malones earlier in the day. The Malones went 2 for 2 on the day, winning against 716 as well. 

This Week’s Games:


Keller Whales vs Bullet Club (+7) - A rematch from last week is on the docket in D3, after a decent game last week by both teams. We’ll see if Bullet Club learned anything from last week’s loss. Probably not. KELLER WHALES BY 2


Vaspian vs 716 (+7) - Vaspian is on top of the world and the second hottest team in D3 (Sorry, Vaspian, The Family is just on fire). They get a 716 team that is stuck at the bottom of the D3 standings, as they struggle to make the one or two more plays they need on either side of the ball to get another win or two. They’ll compete again, but right now it's just Vaspian’s world. VASPIAN BY 3


The Family vs Wanderers (+10) - Imagine my surprise when I opened the TSL betting lines email (I don’t make the lines, I’ve told you that for years) and I see the Wanderers a double digit underdog. That’s crazy to think, but right now they’re going through the toughest stretch they’ve ever had as a 40 year old franchise, and they’re getting a RED HOT Family that’s chock full of weapons. The Family continues to run through D3. THE FAMILY BY 13




Last Week’s Games:


Travis Henry’s Kids 31, Buffalo Vice 29

Father Baker 58, TMA 28

Passing While Intoxicated 64, Father Baker 44

Buffalo Vice 37, ILF 8

Travis Henry’s Kids 42, ILF 24

Passing While Intoxicated 43, Puckett All-Stars 30


THK finally plays some games this season, and they walk away with two impressive wins over Buffalo Vice and ILF. Vice would later go on to also beat ILF, making them 0-2 on the day. Father Baker gets their first win, and it comes at the expense of TMA. The newest gender team in the TSL would NOT get win #2 as PWI would put up a lot of points (64) to beat them, before dropping another 43 on PAS. 

This Week’s Games:


Buffalo Vice vs Father Baker (+13) - This matchup just isn’t great for Father Baker. The ladies are still struggling with defense and now they’re getting Buffalo Vice who can score like the dickens. Andy loves throwing deep. We say it every game, because it holds true. And in this matchup? He might do it literally every play. BUFFALO VICE BY 20


Travis Henry’s Kids vs TMA (+12) - THK has been rolling, and TMA has been, well, not. They’re not playing THAT bad, but I’m sure it feels like they’re letting each other down. That’s not the case as they’ve been in most of their games and it’s just gotten away from them at the end. For this game, they should just have Boccio man Pistol Pete, and force Langley to have to use someone else. I’m not sure it’ll work, but hey, it’s worth a shot. TRAVIS HENRY’S KIDS BY 3


Travis Henry’s Kids vs Buffalo Vice (EVEN) - A rematch of last week’s barnburner is something everyone should want to see. Vice is looking for revenge after last week’s two point loss, and I’m sure they’ve learned a thing or two from a week ago. THK is going to continue to stick to the plan that worked from last week, and we’ll have another good game on our hands. Vice gets the win back. BUFFALO VICE BY 2

Passing While Intoxicated vs Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (+7) - I want to make it known that every single week I hate writing D4. The team names are too damn long (shout out to TMA) and I’m strongly considering shortening everyone’s name every time. PWI, ILF, THK, PAS, you’re all on notice. Anyway, PWI has found their groove. The offense is humming along, scoring 48.7 points in the last three weeks. ILF, to their credit, has arguably the best defense in the league, and should slow them down. The problem? They can’t score. 27 points per game isn’t the greatest, and in this game, they’re going to need at least 30. PWI BY 8



Last Week’s Games:


Creekers 28, Spinelli’s Plumbing 23

Cobblestone 56, Not So Sticky 40

GUCCI 37, Cobblestone 20

Spinelli’s Plumbing 58, Come From Behind 57


The Creekers continue to impress, slowing down the Spinelli’s offense and taking another big win. Spinelli’s would respond by beating CFB in a crazy high scoring game, with 115 points between the two teams in a 1 point win. Cobblestone apparently played with 4 people, and beat NSS anyway, but would go on to lose to GUCCI after that. 

This Week’s Games:


Come From Behind vs Goatsack! (+8) - CFB continues to keep churning out good seasons. Even at 4-2, the two losses were the 1 point loss to Spinelli’s and an 8 point loss to Creekers. They could easily be 6-0 if two plays went differently. They have a full roster mixed with youth and, um, experience. They’ll continue to compete as long as Paul’s arm stays attached. Goatsack is enjoying a nice second season in the TSL, but they still struggle against the top teams in the division. A win here would be huge for them. Would be. COME FROM BEHIND BY 10


Come From Behind vs Cobblestone (+10) - CFB beat Cobblestone by 8 earlier in the year and I can’t fathom a way they lose this one. Cobblestone has struggled with their roster for two decades, so it isn’t surprising that A: they only had four people last week and B: they won a game anyway. The talent is there, Darryl is a magician, but they always struggle with CFB. COME FROM BEHIND BY 9


Creekers vs BAADies (+8) - The BAADies just started to get into a nice flow before they took off the last two weeks and ruined whatever mojo they had going. Their reward is getting to play the red hot Creekers, who have relied on a suffocating defense to run D5. It’ll be interesting to see how the Creekers deal with the talented ladies of the BAADies. My prediction? Creekers win on a late INT because Garrett is washed up. CREEKERS BY 4


GUCCI vs Not So Sticky (+14) - NSS has too many great football minds to really be this bad/unlucky. I was listening to the TSL podcast yesterday, and Mike Thomas said it best for them (I’m paraphrasing here): essentially, NSS is a tweener team. Too good for D6, and not good enough for D5. Unfortunately, we don’t have a D5.5, so they get stuck in limbo, but this is also the team that upsets CFB in the playoffs, so maybe they’re just playing possum. GUCCI isn’t in that boat. They’re a damn good D5 team, and after some rocky weeks, they’re back on track. GUCCI BY 13


GUCCI vs BAADies (+8) - A rematch from Week 1 that GUCCI won 44-16. The BAADies have indeed improved since then, but GUCCI is still quite good, BAADies haven’t played much lately, and GUCCI takes away the BAADies’ gender team advantage by also getting 8 points a TD. GUCCI BY 14



Last Week’s Games:


Balls Deep 33, Sausage McMuffins 16

Two Tuddies 22, Just Get Open 8

Mighty Drunks 54, Blitzkrieg 15

Blitzkrieg 49, Pit Harade 36


I give up on trying to figure out who is good and who isn’t in D6. Anyone can win. Balls Deep knocks off the McMuffins to retake control over 1st place in the division. Two Tuddies continue to be back on track, putting up another victory over Just Get Open, who continues to be a “yo-yo” team, going up and down every other week. The Mighty Drunks followed up being terrible for a few games by being awesome again in a win over Fall Blitzkrieg, and then FB went out and beat Pit Harade right after. 

This Week’s Games:


Balls Deep vs Just Get Open (+6) - Based on how the seasons have gone for these two teams, Balls Deep gets to 1st overall and blows it, and then Just Get Open looks terrible and then stomps someone. Here we go again. I’ll just play the trends. JUST GET OPEN BY 10


Pit Harade vs Back That Pass Up (+10) - PH has found their groove on offense with Gordon throwing for them, constantly using Tall Guy and Fast Guy to abuse matchups. PH still has some defensive issues to worry about, but BTPU has issues all over the place that they still need to overcome. PIT HARADE BY 13


Two Tuddies vs Fall Blitzkrieg (+6) - FBK was allegedly missing a lot of players last week, including the most important player in Light Red Hoodie Guy. If they’re going to be taken seriously as D6 contenders, this is a big game for them. The Tud Buds have shaken off the rough start to remind everyone in D6 just who they are and why they were considered for D5 in the offseason. They’re starting to play at their very high level again, which could be bad for everyone else. TWO TUDDIES BY 12


Sausage McMuffins vs Pit Harade (+10) - The McMuffins suffered their first loss of the season against Balls Deep, but word is they were short handed for that contest anyway. They’ll be looking to get back on track against a not too bad Pit Harade team, who are starting to come along, but they’re not quite on the McMuffins’ level yet. SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS BY 16


Sausage McMuffins vs Mighty Drunks (EVEN) - I don’t know which version of the Drunks we’ll be getting this week. The one that has the dynamite offense or the one that struggles everywhere. The McMuffins are nothing if not consistent. SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS BY 7


Two Tuddies vs Back That Pass Up (+17) - Based on how both teams are playing, and that the Tuddies want revenge for being the only team to ever lose to BTPU, this game might be a bloodbath that children shouldn’t watch. TWO TUDDIES BY 20




  • Are the Freeballers actually for real? I don’t know. I want to say yes. Hogan gives them the right kind of psychopath that fits in with them and they have immediate chemistry. I want to say yes, as scary as that is. 




  • Are the Legends just playing with the rest of the league at this point? I don’t think so. I know they’re having fun and rotating QBs, but I believe that’s out of necessity more than anything. The whispers that they wanted to replace Joey at QB have been there for a while, even if team management denies them. Perhaps they’re just looking for the best contingency plan in case Joey gets hurt? 




  • Which division has become the most interesting? D2 is fun at the top, but I’m going to say it’s D5. I’m just as surprised as you are. After a few seasons of only having 2-3 “contenders”, D5 has 6 teams over .500 and the 6th place team, Spinelli’s Plumbing, just beat the 2nd place CFB 58-57. All Top 6 teams have over 200 points scored on the season except for the 1st place Creekers who have 191, but they have a significantly better defense than the others. Add in that Cobblestone and Not So Sticky are still more than capable of pulling off playoff upsets, and I have NO idea what’ll happen in this one. 




  • So then, which division is the most boring? Every division has its own intrigue, and I won’t say any of them are “boring”, but D1 is just kind of blah. It got a bit interesting with more teams last season, but right now it just feels like we’re on the crash course of Eyes Downtown vs Legends in the final, after Losing Streak and Sticky give them good games in Round 1. 




  • How has Breakfast Club been? It’s kind of going according to plan. The games are close, but BC has been mostly chalk based off the draft. Becca/Ashley’s team is very good, Steph/Misty and Mackenzie’s teams have been good but not perfect, and Jenna’s team leaves a bit to be desired. What’s more interesting is how the thought of only four teams with larger rosters would alleviate the issues that arise with teams needing 9am subs more often than not. However it seems like EVERYONE keeps showing up. BC is better with at least 6 teams, so hopefully in the Spring we get back to where we should be. 





  • Has anything been more clutch this season than the weather? I know global warming is considered a bad thing, but it’s been nothing but good for the league. My Weather Channel app says you’re looking at 72 degrees, but cloudy this week. It’s late September. Be grateful. 




  • The bar “special” this week is that Woodcock Bros is going to be at the bar from 2-4pm with two kegs to give out samples. Joe K put out the challenge on the podcast to all of the TSL: Get those kegs empty. Good luck to you. 




  • Three teams that need a win: Losing Streak, TMA, THREAD




  • Games of the Day: 
  • 10:00 - Come From Behind vs Goatsack!
  • 11:00 - Bullet Club vs Keller Whales
  • 12:00 - Buffalo Vice vs Travis Henry’s Kids
  • 1:00 - ILF vs PWI
  • 2:00 - Mighty Drunks vs Sausage McMuffins
  • 3:00 - The Family vs Wanderers
  • Breakfast Club Predictions:
  • BDD 37, The Dirty Dozen 28
  • Steph’s Mistyrious Infection 42, Blach-ur-anus 22




  • I’m interested to see how both Frodo and the BAADies do after taking two weeks off. I guess I’m just interested to see how Garrett throws now that he’s had his darkness retreat or whatever he was on. If he’s rusty just as he was starting to improve, it’s going to be a long three weeks for them. 




  • Will the real Balls Deep please stand up? No team has played up or down to their competition more than they have this season. 




  • Again, Friday December 8th is the TSL Banquet. Save the date. 




  • After hearing Mike Thomas on the TSL podcast this week, it’s still amazing that he’s never won nicest person in the league. That should change asap. 




  • Word is Topper made an appearance at the fields this week, proving he’s not dead, AND he’s talking about his return to playing. Players are lining up to get onto his next team. The only issue, of course, is that it’s all guys and the girls are staying far, far away. Typical. 



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