Week One

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Category: The Sentinel

Created: Tuesday, 27 August 2024 16:20

Published: Tuesday, 27 August 2024 16:20

Written by Patrick McGovern

Hits: 57

Week One

Brilliant

1. Straw Hats leader Mike Ferguson caught an incredible touchdown, unfortunately he sustained an injury later in the game.
2. Girls Rule the World!! Magen Campbell and Jessie Kieta play defense in the Powerpuff Girls double header, each grab an interception, swat balls away from male and female receivers, which help to seal the games against Come From Behind and Spinelli’s Plumbing. 
3. Sticky Laces QB, Kyle Messina leads the  S’laces to two wins in D6! His cool demeanor kept the laces ahead of both Dogg Pound and Balls Deep. We smell a championship coming. 
4. Kyle Connif Shakes hangover, settles in to deliver sparkling passes to the Blossom, Bubbles, Buttercup and the crew, as Powerpuff girls sweep double header.  
5. Derek Pew arrives in a suit, forced to throw short passes due to the constricting, Armani sleeves. Leads Vaspian to a Win. Distributes business cards that say “Come to Derek Pew for all your real estate needs.” After the game to all fans. 
6. Frodo Swaggins girls led a come from behind victory against Can’t Touch This. Tori Leighbody pukes, rallies, and sprints; while Katie “Kilimanjaro” Swanson scores toe-tapping, deep ball touchdown as the crowd erupts.
7. The Malones show up and rout D2 incumbent Scared Hitless, Race Colon immediately exclaims D2 is too easy, and wants to take on D1.
8. Veteran-laden Buffalo Vice starts the Fall Season strong, as shifty ankle-breaker Caitlyn Mason leaves Bullet Club defenders in the dust for multiple touchdowns. 
9. Multiple teams started the season with friendly bucket bets before games. Let’s keep this tradition going!
10.  Sausage McMuffins receiver had a brilliant touchdown catch. On a deep ball, the ball was ripped out, spun in the air, and the receiver still came up with possession for a touchdown. 

Blunders

1. Jeremy Burr missing from the fields, sulking his wounds from the Spring Playoff Loss. Rumors state he spent the offseason trying to join any team that won a championship. 
2. Bobby McConnell gets picked off three times against Wet Bandits. Chris Nelson makes two acrobatic picks and Sean Weisenhal snags the ED ball out of the air with one hand. 
3. Reminder that there are no same day subs! You can’t steal a player from another team who happens to be hanging out on the sidelines. Teams are given 15 spots for rosters, and final rosters aren’t due for a few weeks. Fill up your roster, make sure you have enough players! 
4. Passing While Intoxicated and Cobblestone  both showed up short-handed this week giving their opponents easy wins for the first week. 
5. Mike Thomas misses out on rounds of shots to celebrate his own birthday.
6. TSL can’t break the Week One fight streak… fights ensue in multiple games.
7. Ref Treatment- Touching a ref is a guaranteed way to get yourself thrown out of a game and suspended. Don’t do it. Also make sure BEFORE THE GAME, you have 30 dollars available in cash for refs. Refs are not required to accept your Venmo, be prepared to pay cash. 
8. Jabronies star Eric Klecker drops deep balls in his double header. Joe Miano looks perplexed and asks “You know you have to catch the ball with your hands right?”
9. Topper is plagued with yet another shoulder injury, sentenced to the sidelines while his team struggles slinging the rock. Via interview, Topper said “I won’t even risk playing defense unless it's to shut down the Recckio Twerp.” 
10. Blase learns that he must tag a Quarterback three times in order to get one the credit for a sack.

Points of Emphasis

While we like to bring recaps and fun to the league for everybody’s viewing pleasure, it feels like the Godfather and Jeff Krol are tasked with driving some key points home seemingly every week, so we feel like we need to chime in:

1. You still have time to add to your roster (within reason, and not to stack your roster after registering in a certain division). We say this because we have already had to deal with forfeits, and rag tag squads. Forfeits are no fun for everybody, particularly for the team that does show up ready to play, and for the players on the forfeiting team that came ready. If you are concerned with fielding a roster, hit the sub list. There are ALWAYS players willing to chip in to help out, and it is better to request and end up not needing, rather than ending up with a not fun time for all involved. If you have concerns about not having enough players, ask around to add on to your current roster, or become familiar with the sub list!
2. We hit this point in the blunders already, and Jeff Krol and the GodFather relentlessly make this point, but it bears repeating: BE NICE TO THE REFS! Just about every single ref does not mind some griping and complaining; that just comes with the territory. We all do it, we all get frustrated, and that is okay. However, know there is a line not to cross, say your piece, and move on. If you want the ref to look for something, talk to them. If you have any issues with how officiating is going, come to Garrett, Jeff, or any other person you think can help, and discuss your concerns. Yes, the refs are being paid, so we want games to be called as best as possible, and for refs to pay attention to the game, but that does not entitle beratement. I think most are good about it, but it bears repeating. 
3. I think we all have seen some injuries come from some games throughout the last few years, and obviously we know that is a risk of playing. With that said, while competing and winning is important, we all have to go back to work on Mondays, and the goal is to compete, but be safe as well. Be mindful while out there of your surroundings, and try to avoid plays that can lead to injury. Winning is fun and important, but safety is more important. Maybe it leads to giving up a catch, or a score, but avoiding collisions is far more important!

WEEK 8 REVIEW

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Category: The Sentinel

Created: Tuesday, 18 June 2024 13:15

Published: Tuesday, 18 June 2024 13:15

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 563

The regular season is now over, and boy did a lot happen in the final week of the season! We hope everybody enjoyed the transition we here at the Sentinel made last week, diving deeper into individual observations as opposed to trying to delve into game recaps. This week, we have our usual Brilliant and Blunders, and finish it off with some observations made as we watched all the action on Saturday. There was a lot to get into, so without further ado, here we go!

Brilliant

1. Chris Nelson and ShBend use their afterburners to catchDaballs. We apologize for the pun…
2. Multiple TSLers apply sunscreen! Dogs, Children, Families, and Fun is had by all!
3. Tater Tots monopolizes the Dunk Tank, current front runners to Spring Season Best at Bar.
4. Kevin of Vaspian leads his team to two near victories, True TSL Sportsmanship was on display.
5. Farr vs Farr in ED vs Scared Hitless. Brothers duke it out and have some crazy athletic plays on each other.
6. Carly Reeb scores a leaping touchdown, sideline roars with applause.
7. Scott McGregor demonstrates athleticism while deflecting passes, going stride for stride with various opponents, and scoring on a Go Route. 
8. Frank Laudico goes 1-1 on the day, but wins over our hearts by bringing multiple buckets up to the bar, and volunteering his body for the dunk tank. 
9. Unknown Male Receiver from Pit Harade completes the tip, tip, touchdown against Blitzkrieg. A Valiant Effort to bring the ball in. 
10. Can’t Touch This wins two games on the day, against a D1 and D2 team. Eric Delecki sparks offense for Can’t Touch This.

Blunders

1. TSLer’s scream and use profanity at the Bartenders. Let’s remember that we are guests at the bar, the bartenders do not control prices and are simply there to work and that they are part of the TSL family. 
2. Krol unveils new sadistic punishment. Derek Pew spins and is punished with a Belly Shot off of Scott Klussman. 
3. Rick Recckio tries to use his good looks and charm to get past Patrick “Topper” McGovern on a deep post. Topper swats it away and says “Not TODAY!!”
4. Blase lays on ground, mid-game, to catch some extra Vitamin D in D1/D2 Crossover Game.
5. Travis abandons Scared Hitless for Eyes Uptown, looked to have mid-game regret.
6. Brandy Clarke was her usual awesome self on the fields... but her blunder was agreeing to spin the Wheel of Prizes/Punishments.  Guess who's now responsible for getting B's Brother to and from the TSL Banquet this year?
7. Practice Squad and Wanderers make refs Buddy Lee and Langley question their ability to keep a proper count, only to be proven wrong in the end TWICE in the same game. Players gently chide them the rest of the game. 
8. Roaring 20’s get lead against PWI, falter as the vet Buddy Lee gets his team in check, and Roaring 20’s falls apart. 
9. Cobblestone loses against Cunning Stunts, when in a shocking plot twist, they were NOT the team playing short-handed for once!
10. Jeneva Conventions show up without their fearless leader for playoffs, go on to get blown out without proper leadership. Team would not listen to Jamie McCabe when he said where the ball was going every time. 

Week 8 Observations

1. Is the gap between D1 and D2 that big? Doesn’t seem like it! We got another dose of D2 upsets with Mavericks taking down the Sticky Bandits (not to be confused with the Wet Bandits, those guys never lose!) Jordan Lawson is a man on a mission this session, proving once and for all he knows how to build a team to compete. Having D1 talent in D2 doesn’t hurt! 
2. Can’t Touch This took down a depleted Frodo team, which begs the question; Does Garrett’s team hate him? They seem to NEVER show up in full. You gotta feel bad for him. That was the story of that game. CTT showed up in full, and they bit off Frodo’s finger and dropped them into the fire. 
3. In Breakfast Club, Rick Burton intercepted an extra point attempt, while returning the ball out of the endzone, he tried to lateral to his teammate and that was intercepted by Alex Dutkieicz, on the original offense. All of that excitement for one point.   
4. Is anybody stopping the Cunning Stunts in D4? They went out there Saturday and won TWO games short-handed. That begs the question, however, if they can get over their past mistakes of blowing it out in the regular season, just to give it away come playoffs. Something seems different this year though. Their games aren’t close, and Joey is defending on another level. Doesn’t hurt to have Mel Linsmair back at safety too!
5. Dave Baker shows that Father Time and Father’s Day weekend will not stop his football career. Baker completed a toe tap touchdown in his D1/D2 Crossover game.
6. D6 looks to be Pit Harade, and everybody else heading into playoffs. They went out there against Blitzkrieg, arguably their biggest competition, and delivered with precision. Dave Walter has been AWESOME at QB. With Bullet Club being competitive in every game with a good roster, and the success of Pit Harade, Joe K has been running around the field and bar telling everybody he is THE best GM in the TSL.
7. We have the best four teams in the breakfast club heading into the semi-finals. Mistymeanors won a tight one against D’s Nutz, who will go down as the best winless breakfast club team in the history of this league. They had their shot at the end to win it, but fell just short, which is seemingly how every game went for them. 
8. Chris Wolcott could not outjump the ladies of THK for a sixth down, Hail Mary. He was seen tugging on his shirt asking to play skins. The other receivers of Two Tuddies were playing well  despite a loss. 
9. David “Bro” Klecker makes his return as a Quarterback for the Jabronies. While QB Joe Miano is away becoming the next Dave Grohl, the Nirvana Version, Bro makes his comeback. Unfortunately, fate, luck, and athleticism were not on Bro’s side as he couldn’t connect with big brother Eric repeatedly throughout the game.
10. TMA requested the services of Colorado Mike to be their Quarterback for their last game of the season. While Mike didn’t bring in a victory, he did bring a welcome boost of praise and joy to the team. Mike connected with Val Testa in the end zone and celebrated her success!!

PLAYOFFS REVIEW

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Category: The Sentinel

Created: Monday, 24 June 2024 13:37

Published: Monday, 24 June 2024 13:37

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 546

Happy playoffs TSLer’s, and welcome back to another lovely edition of the Sentinel! We truly hope that everybody is enjoying the new and improved version of the Sentinel, as we take pride in providing the most comprehensive breakdowns WNY touch football can provide! Sadly for you all, this will be our last write-up of the season. With that being the case, we wanted to bring the largest Sentinel you have seen in YEARS! In addition to our brilliant and blunders segment, we broke down some players in each division that caught our eyes this session. We emphasize again this is NOT a ranking of players, as the Power Rankings crew threatened to take us to court over copyright infringement if we ranked players. They take that stuff personally, and we wouldn’t want to step on their toes (or lose in court, they hired some pretty top-notch attorneys). 

With that said, we thank you fellow TSLers for tuning in all season long. We hope we have brought some hard-hitting coverage, and we will be back and better than ever in the fall. Good luck to all the teams still alive for their respective championships, and enjoy the final Sentinel of the season!

Brilliant

1. Caitlin Mason hauls in a deep tuddy over Katie Keller, KK shakes head in disappointment.
2. Nick Stutzman hits Wide Open Receiver on a Streak, uses the Tiger Woods celebration.
3. Mark Brown (Buffalo Vice Tall Guy) snags a stellar pick in the red zone against Keller Whales.
4. Kayla Voss Toe Taps for a Touchdown against Not So Sticky on the back line. Completes the drive with the extra point on the front line. 
5. Pit Harade’s Pony Tail Man has stellar game with a deep touchdown and an interception pitched to a girl. His excitement made us excited!
6. Brian Stevens seals Sticky trip to D1 Championship with interception. 
7. Sean Weisensal mosses Katie Swanson in the back right corner.
8. James Hearn shows he still has it, secures a touchdown in the middle of three defenders. 
9. Playoff B shows up!! Takes down Wanderers and Creekers in D3/D4 playoffs. Puts next weeks team on notice. 
10. Craig Mikida of Vaspian shows unprecedented endurance with running a record 25 streak routes, managed to smile the entire game. 

Blunders

1. Jeremy Burr fakes a cramp after being torched on play.

2. Kelly Kane throws horrendous pick to the other team, forced to play hours of flip cup afterwards. 

3. Joe K refuses to play odds with Frank Laduico, called out for being a spoiled sport.  

4. Alex “Buddy” Lee stays sober all day, focusing on winning playoff games. 

5. Tom Mullen drops 3 potential interceptions, drives teammates crazy. 

6. Puckett All-Stars fumbles 20-plus point lead, loses to Untouchaballs. Changes name to Panther All Stars.

7. Balls Deep receivers catch two touchdowns, unfortunately land on the line every single time.  [TSL Rule Clarification- The One Foot In Policy, means that only One Foot needs to be in, not touching any line or cone, to be considered a catch. However, the other foot or any part of the body cannot  be touching the line or grass that is out of bounds.]

8. Mike Thomas loses his footing, stumbles, and falls against Amber Hay in the Not So Sticky/PPG rematch.  

9. TMA pulls a no-show, forfeits game gifting THK easiest path to semi-finals. TSL infuriated as Langley didn’t have to earn it. 

10. Come From Behind Comes into game as heavy favorites, receivers let down gunslinger Paul LoVullo in shocking blowout loss to Stir The Sauce. 

Distinguished Players of the League

Division One

Chris Nelson (Eyes Uptown)

Chris Nelson has risen to Stardom. Has anyone else had an award named after them??? [Editor's Note: Yes]  If so, no one else has had an award for being too good at this game. Then when they move up to the highest possible division, they also are too good at this game. He is uncoverable, he is reliable, he is kind, he is an absolute specimen, and he wins games. 

ShBend Betsa (Eyes Uptown)

While other players on Eyes Uptown may garner more attention, we’ve kept our eyes on ShBend. We don’t think there is a player in this division who is faster, gets open more, and makes more critical plays than ShBend. Deep Routes? ShBend will burn by his man. Need a pick? He’s claimed quite a few this season. Need someone who plays with his kids and is a total athlete? This is your guy.

Maddie Norton (Eyes Uptown)

Maddie Norton has been sneaky good this year. While she also has been playing down in Division 5 with the PowderPuff Girls, she’s earned most of her cred up in D1. She doesn’t seem weighed down at all by the copious amount of jewelry and bedazzled necklaces on regular weeks, or the pounds of facepaint and cape she wears during “costume day.”. Joey and her have developed a powerful chemistry that involves crossing routes, a quick juke, and more often than not a touchdown. 

Drew Colosimo (Sticky Bandits)

Drew may have been reshackled to Patrick McGovern once a week this season, but when his chains are freed he runs and jumps as if he is weightless. Drew has often been seen pulling in a deep ball that seems to be out of reach, yet somehow brings it in, again and again. He’s the Sticky Bandit cheat code. 

Christine Krol (Sticky Bandits)

Christine Krol is a fierce athlete who has staged a remarkable comeback from motherhood. She’s an inspiration to mothers everywhere. Christine has connected with Mike Thomas a multitude of times on deep routes and red zone plays. Christine fosters a competitive spirit and family among her teammates.

Cody Stumpf (Eyes Downtown)

Cody Stumpf is the dynamic leader of Eyes Downtown, known for his strategic vision and playmaking skills on the field. His ability to read the game and make split-second decisions has earned him a reputation as a pivotal figure in Eyes Downtown’s success. Cody's leadership extends beyond his impressive performance; he inspires teammates with his passion for the game and his relentless drive to win. As the heartbeat of Eyes Downtown, Cody Stumpf combines talent with a fierce competitive spirit.

Amber Hay (Eyes Downtown)

Amber Hay epitomizes dedication on the field, playing through numerous injuries while showcasing exceptional route-running skills and unwavering sure-handedness, even with a dislocated finger. Her resilience and commitment to her team shines through as she continues to excel despite physical setbacks. Amber's ability to maintain precision in her routes and secure catches underscores her invaluable contribution to her team. Amber also captains the PowderPuff Girls down in Division 5. 

Andrew "Al" Alessi (Frodo Swaggins)

Al is a crucial asset to Frodo Swaggins, renowned for his speed and sure-handed skills on the field. His ability to swiftly maneuver through defenses and secure catches under pressure makes him a reliable playmaker in critical moments. Al's presence not only boosts team morale, but also significantly enhances their offensive capabilities. His combination of agility and reliable performance makes him indispensable, but he hasn’t quite figured out how to calm his QB’s temper.

Katie Swanson (Frodo Swaggins)

Katie Swanson is a remarkable athlete whose prowess lies not only in her ability to get open and catch the ball, but she has exceptional throwing abilities that make her a unique talent in D1. Known for her silent intensity on the field, Katie commands attention from defenses. Katie Swanson is more than just a skilled athlete; she embodies grace under pressure and the steadfast commitment required to succeed at the highest levels of competition.

Honorable Mentions- Sean Weisensal (Eyes Uptown), Josh Schnieder (Frodo Swaggins), Ben Stack (Eyes Downtown), Tori Leighbody (Frodo Swaggins)

Division Two

Kyle Abernathy (Mavericks)

This man is underrated and we are shocked that he has not been pulled up to D1. For those of you that don’t know, he is fast, he has great hands, he has muscles, and he rocks those blue shorts! Kyle is an under-utilized part of the Maverick Offense, we’ve never seen him drop a ball. He also never demands the ball or yells out when he is wide open. Kyle of Mavericks, a great teammate, a good weapon, and good guy!

Misty Himes (Mavericks)

Misty Himes is the electrifying deep threat for the Mavericks, known for her petite frame, blazing speed, and knack for running routes. Despite her size, Misty's ability to stretch defenses and create big plays has made her Jordan's favorite target on the field. Misty also brings to the league, her dutiful fiance Andrew, who is often seen with a smile and camera. Her agility and speed make her a constant matchup problem for opposing defenses, earning her the title of the Mavericks' Jewel. 

Matt Helm (Untouchaballs)

Matt Helm is more than just a player on the Untouchaballs; he is their cornerstone, their unwavering pillar of strength. Every game, without fail, the strategy was straightforward: throw the ball in Matt's direction and trust in his ability to catch it. His hands seemed magnetized to the composite plastic ball… (actually maybe he is using glue??) It looks effortless as he plucks passes out of the air as they seem to float for hours. Matt's calm demeanor under pressure is always helpful to his team.

Nina Komosinski (Untouchaballs)

Nina is a valuable addition to the Untouchaballs, bringing a friendly demeanor and strong skills in man-to-man defense to the team. Despite being new to the team, she seamlessly integrates into the fold, quickly earning the trust and respect of her teammates. Nina's ability to adapt and contribute effectively in a higher division demonstrates her potential to thrive in more competitive settings.

Jaime Warren (Scared Hitless)

Jaime Warren, age 32, stands out as the tall, blonde trainer on Scared Hitless. Jaime has been mastering both short crosses and those deep, “oh shoot, we are scrambling now”routes. Her height gives her an edge in aerial battles, while her agility and awareness make her a formidable threat in open space.

Jessie K (Freeballers)

Jessie Kieta embodies intensity on the field, known for her incredible rushing skills that strike fear into opponents. Her teammates hold her in high regard, believing she could outrun anyone in the competitive divisions in a dash. Jessie's relentless drive and determination make her a formidable force, 

Andy Heftka (Freeballers)

Andy Heftka stands tall as a key player for the Freeballers, known for his proficiency in executing curl and out routes with precision. His reliable hands and strategic route running make him a vital asset to the team's offense, consistently contributing crucial plays that keep the momentum going. Andy's presence on the field adds depth and reliability to the Freeballers' game plan

Rich Anderson (Can’t Touch This)

Rich has wanted some love, and we are going to give it to him. An incredibly underrated player, Rich is what we will call the “glue guy” of CTT. Sneaky athleticism, heck of a beard, and all over the field, Rich has been a rock for Ryan, and he gets him the ball at will. He isn’t just a one way player, though. He plays tough on both sides. 

Robbie Milewski (Can’t Touch This)

Robbie Milewski is the definition of rock solid. Maybe not the best athlete out there, and maybe not the most gifted, but he is as solid as they come. Whether it is on defense or offense, he is always in the right spot and makes the play required. He has been there from the beginning for Can’t Touch This, and it is time he gets his shine.

Honorable Mentions- George Lombardo (Mavericks), Big Bearded Guy (Scared Hitless), Matt Kieta (Freeballers), Allie Chavanne (Can’t Touch This)

Division Three

Rhace Colon (The Malones)

Rhace Colon, known for his quickness and vocal presence as a touchdown-scoring machine. Sporting a visor that reflects his focused demeanor, Rhace consistently delivers decisive victories for his team, often by significant margins. His ability to break through defenses with lightning speed and celebrate each touchdown with gusto has made him a standout player in every game. Rhace's winning mentality and explosive performance make him a formidable force that opponents find challenging to contain, solidifying his reputation as a game-changer on the field.

Sal Augugliaro (The Wanderers)

Sal, known for his tattoos and loud personality, is one of THE best players in D3, and he shows it on a weekly basis. Defensively, throw at his side at your own risk, because he will break on the ball quickly and take it the other way. On offense, he is Frank Laudico’s most trusted weapon, probably because they have played together for over a decade. No, that is just part of it; Sal is just so freaking good! He is also such a loveable personality, and seemingly everybody’s friend. We love that!

Mackenzie Klun Corbelli (The Wanderers)

Do not mistake Mackenzie's kindness for weakness, because she will school you out on that field! Mackenzie is another Wanderer who has been freely Wandering the fields for a long time, and she has the unconditional trust of Frank, and for good reason. One of the tallest girls in the league, Mackenzie also has some of the best hands. She was an easy one to shout out, as she is as consistent as anybody in this league!

Joe Striegel (Jabronies)

Joe, the quiet stalwart from the Jabronies, embodies a contrasting presence to the flamboyance of Kleckers on the field. While often overshadowed, Striegel's skill and precision make him a formidable player in his own right. His steady demeanor and focused gameplay complement Kleckers' more dynamic style, proving that quiet strength and consistency are equally valuable traits in the game. In every match, Striegel's quiet resolve and skill speak volumes about his contribution to the Jabronies’ success.

Jordan McGregor (Keller Whales)

Jordan McGregor is a standout on the field, known for his lightning speed and striking bleach blonde hair. His athleticism is unmatched, often bailing out his team with phenomenal defensive plays. McGregor's ability to cover ground swiftly and his impeccable defensive skills make him a formidable force in any game, consistently proving himself as a crucial asset on the field.

Team Santonocito (Let's Get Reccked)

Corey and Molly Santonocito bring a fresh dynamic to "Let's Get Reccked," injecting both experience and unique skills into the team. Molly, with her speed and veteran presence, offers stability amidst a roster that sees frequent turnover. Her ability to navigate the field with agility and make decisive plays adds a strategic edge to the team's game plan. Buchlis has been wise to utilize her as a weapon. Not to be outdone, Corey contributes not only with his athleticism, but also with his charm and dexterity. Renowned for his gentle hands and keen understanding of pass coverage, Corey enhances the team's defensive capabilities while bringing a charismatic presence to their lineup. Together, the Santonocitos bolster "Let's Get Reccked" with a blend of skill, reliability, and personality, making them valuable additions.

Caitlin Mason (Buffalo Vice)

Caitlin Mason, the swift and nimble slot receiver, thrives on her exceptional chemistry with quarterback Andy. Despite her small stature, Mason adeptly handles the challenging throws and intricate routes. Her ability to secure catches, whether short or long, showcases her versatility and reliability on the field. Mason's adaptability makes her a crucial asset in the team's offensive strategy, consistently delivering key plays.

Dan Gonzalez (Buffalo Vice)

Dan Gonzalez is one of the nicest guys you can ever meet, too nice if you ask us, but he is super underrated too. Dan is the captain for Buffalo Vice, who have acclimated well to D3, and Dan is the brains behind the operation, putting his team in the right position, and playing his consistent game where he just gets open at will. 

Renee Lantz (Practice Squad)

Renee Lantz shines brightly on the Practice Squad, widely recognized as one of the top female players in her division. She is also renowned for her contributions on Cunning Stunts in Division 4. On offense, her ability to make phenomenal plays sets her apart, making her a go-to target for any Quarterback. With a knack for reading the game and impeccable skills, Renee consistently delivers game-changing performances.

Honorable Mentions- Ashley Bower (Bullet Club), Jaime McCabe (Practice Squad), April Meier (Jabronies), Aaron Balcerzak (Toppers All Stars & Todd)

Division Four 

Taylor Pagano (Cunning Stunts)

What else is there to say about Taylor? She has been a strong figure for the Cunning Stunts for years, while also dominating in D1. Taylor has always taken the safety spot for the Stunts, and thrives at it, always in position to make a play, and not giving an inch to the male receivers. Offensively, you are hard pressed to find a girl with better hands. If you put the ball near her, like Joey always does, she is catching it 10/10 times.

Maggie LaMantia (Cunning Stunts)

Maggie Lamantia stands out as the premier rusher in the league, holding the record for the most sacks in a single day. She is one of the many Division One girls on this team, and she she showcases what D1 girls are capable of. Beyond her rushing ability, Maggie is equally formidable on offense, making her a versatile threat that opponents must always account for. Her ability to dominate on both sides of the ball solidifies her reputation as one of the most impactful players in the division.

Rebecca Dominesey (Interdimensional Lightning Falcons)

Rebecca Dominesey is a vital core member of ILF, known for her unwavering positivity and steadfast support for her teammates. Her infectious enthusiasm and encouragement uplift those around her. Becca was recently honored as the winner of the Lenny Alba Person of the Year award. She consistently delivers standout performances on defense in coverage and as a rusher. 

Katelyn Koester (Interdimensional Lightning Falcons)

Katelyn Koester brings a fresh energy to ILF, transitioning seamlessly from hockey with a perpetually bright smile. Despite being new to the sport, Katelyn is quickly learning the game and making a notable impact by putting up points for her team. Her enthusiasm and positivity are contagious, uplifting her teammates and contributing to a positive team dynamic. Katelyn's ability to adapt and excel have made her a promising addition to ILF as she continues to grow and thrive on the field.

Mike “Colorado” Shimburski (Passing While Intoxicated)

Colorado Mike plays a pivotal role in PWI's success with his knack for finding open zones and his reliable hands. His jovial attitude not only lifts his team spirits, but also fosters a positive environment crucial for team cohesion. His skills and positive demeanor make him an essential asset to PWI's achievements. This is the man you want to have a drink with at the end of your game. 

Megan Mallon (Tater Tots)

Megan Mallon is a speedster on offense, causing defenders considerable trouble with her movements and routes. Her quarterback has adeptly utilized her skills, finding creative ways to maximize her impact on the field. Beyond her athletic prowess, Megan is known for her pleasant demeanor, bringing positivity to every game she plays. She was a hit on “Lenny and Rameer Day!” She understands what this league is about, competition, fun, and socialization. 

Megan Marcus (Tater Tots)

Megan Marcus is a cornerstone of the league, a regular in the breakfast club, a bar socialite, and an integral part of the Tater Tots. We’ve all met Megan, we all know Megan, and we all love Megan. However, most of us know her by her Nickname “Drunk Meg” and she will buy you a mimosa. 

Tawan Crosby (Reset Warriors)

Tawan Crosby known for his imposing height and quiet determination. Standing tall amidst the chaos of the game, he emerges as a consistent red zone threat. Despite navigating through a carousel of new quarterbacks, his ability to adapt and excel remains undeniable. Crosby's height gives him a distinct advantage, allowing him to tower over defenders and secure crucial catches in critical moments. During the game Tawan maintains a quiet demeanor, preferring to let his actions on the field. 

Kevin Hurley (Vaspian)

Kevin stands as the undisputed leader of Vaspian, the go-to player when a crucial play is needed. His athleticism and exceptional sportsmanship make him a standout on the team. Kevin's notable physical attribute, his massive legs, not only contribute to his impressive speed but also symbolize his strength and determination on the field. 

Honorable Mentions: Addison Szumigala (PWI-IR), Dylan Jaloza (Tater Tots), Craig Mikida (Vaspian)

Division Five

Mark B (Gucci)

Mark is the lockdown defender of Gucci, using his length and speed to track down top receivers of opposing teams. Mark has shown his ability to clamp down, and get the stops needed for Gucci to keep its stifling defense at the top of the division. Want to know why they are? Look at Mark!

Molly McDermid (Come From Behind)

Molly, perhaps the SWEETEST person in the TSL, has been a mainstay for Come From Behind, and everybody’s favorite! Molly has consistently strong hands, and a great understanding of the game and how it needs to be played to win. It is no surprise Come From Behind has been a constant threat in the division with her and the crew around. 

Karl Smith (Not So Sticky)

Karl Smith is one of the many, many seasoned veterans in the lineup. Despite the years, mileage, wear and ample tear, Karl continues to maintain his gifts and agility through a disciplined regimen that includes ample rest and strategic breaks during drives. His experience and commitment to his body make him a reliable asset on the field, when he is in attendance. 

Pete Walbrandt (Travis Henry’s Kids)

Pete Walbrandt is a D1 talent masquerading in D5 thanks to his loyalty to his friend and QB, John Langley. Pete has shown time and time again how unguardable he is, and seems to get a pick on defense every game. It is a surprise a D1 team has not tried to pluck him from THK, but we don’t think he would go anyway. He loves playing with his team, and dominates while doing so. THK puts up points at will with him, and struggled without him. That is the definition of MVP.  

Britney Matthews (PowderPuff Girls)

Britney Matthews is a focused and determined team player. She often will play safety on defense, which is one of the hardest spots to be on a gender team. Yet, she has exceptional positioning and defensive prowess, even when facing off against male opponents. Her dedication to the game and strategic acumen allow her to anticipate plays effectively, contributing significantly to her team success.

Dan "The Wrestler" Farinacci (Stir the Sauce)

Dan is a super cool guy, and freakishly large. It is not just his size that makes him so good, he catches everything, and has good lateral quickness to make plays on the ball on defense. It feels like if Dan can keep the team together, they will only continue to improve, and he is a great building block for that team. 

Dorene Major (TMA)

What team hasn’t Dorene played for? We kid, but that is how popular and willing to step up she is, and she has solid hands and knows how to play in this league, as one of the vets in the TSL. A true definition of a team player, Dorene is always encouraging her teammates, sacrificing for the better of TMA, and making plays in the process. She embodies what the TSL is all about!

Brent Mackenzie (TMA)

Brent, the loveable fun personality of TMA, and a fan favorite! Brent has been playing in this league for such a long time, everybody rallies around him and wants to see his team succeed. Brent is a consistent player, gets open, and he is NOT going to drop the ball if it hits his hands. He is sneaky, and when you underestimate him, do it at your own peril, because he WILL get open. 

Chris Wolcott (Two Tuddies)

Chris, the undisputed best player for the Tud Buds, is a great athlete that gets open at will. I am not sure what disappoints Chris more; the final record for the Tuddies, or the fact he has to wear the jersey instead of playing skins. Jokes aside, he is a rock solid player that teams have to focus on when playing the Tuddies, and he really showed how unselfish he was when he made the choice to stick with them instead of playing with the top team, Gucci. There is a lot that can and should be said for that, so kudos Chris!

Honorable Mentions: Kory Reid (Two Tuddies), Alex Corbelli (THK), Harlan Lovullo (Come From Behind), Thomas Fields (Gucci), Laura (Gucci), Val Testa (TMA)

Division Six

Mike Malicki (Pit Harade)

Mike Malicki stands out as a relatively unknown player in our league, yet he has played with the best of them. A former D1 player for Public Enemy. He’s got the body of a tight end, Tall, Great Hands, and finds holes.  He excels in finding the back of the end zone, showcasing his ability to score. Give him the ball anytime you are in the endzone! It’s foolproof. Despite not always being in the spotlight, Malicki's contributions on the field speak volumes about his skill.

Joe Kurczewski (Pit Harade) 

Joe K is an influential socialite in the league who is well known for networking and fostering a sense of community. If you want to become known, buy this guy a drink. If you want to learn some TSL history, talk to this guy. If you want to make friends, he will introduce you to people. Beyond all the social aspects that he promotes, he is also a player and manager of Bullet Club and Pit Harade. Joe has learned his knack on the field and he does it well. He can find any hole and slip into it. 

Trish Esposito (Sausage McMuffins)

Trish Esposito, well known for her short stature and big personality, was a former co-host of the TSL podcast. Trish has been playing the game for quite some time and has always brought positivity to whatever team she's been on. She’s got a lot of energy whether it's 9 am for a breakfast club game or 3 pm at the end of the TSL day.

Melissa Skipworth (Balls Deep)

Melissa Skipworth has shown significant improvement over the last two seasons as a player, demonstrating herself as a team-oriented individual who is eager to learn and easy to coach. Her positive influence extends beyond her performance, as she actively works to improve her team on and off the field.

Alex Dutkiewicz (Back that Pass Up)

Alex Dutkiewicz is a pivotal figure in the football scene, known for his expertise and contributions, particularly for the team "Back that Pass Up." You’ve also seen him around as a referee or bringing Buddy into the spotlight. Alex's dedication and knowledge make him an essential go-to person behind the scenes. His presence and support in the game are valued by many who have experienced his kindness and professionalism firsthand.

Molly (Just Joshing)

Molly is a standout gem in Division 6, demonstrating skills that could easily transition to higher divisions without missing a beat. Her exceptional hands, speed, and pressure as a rusher make her an all star on any team. It's only a matter of time before Molly catches the eye of a higher-tier team or gets recruited for a gender team. 

Honorable Mentions- Kanye Shearer (Mighty Drunks), Jack (Blitzkrieg), Boogie (Balls Deep). 

WEEK 7 REVIEW

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Category: The Sentinel

Created: Tuesday, 11 June 2024 12:34

Published: Tuesday, 11 June 2024 12:34

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 590

Welcome back to the Sentinel! Week 7 has come and gone, and we are turning the corner to the final week of the regular season, where standings and matchups matter even more! We here at the Sentinel have decided that just like the league has evolved and changed leadership, we also want to make a transition here, and change the way we cover games. 

In years past, this has been dedicated to watching as many games as we possibly can, take mental notes, and write them up. That proved to be a challenge, and we felt as though we were not appropriately getting people their due, getting a hold of all the action, and making this a fun experience for all! We only have two eyes to see things, and instead, we will be doing something a little different each week to recap the past weeks games, while providing some insight on our observations of players, plays, and games. We will kick this thing off with what we saw in the brilliant, and the blunders and cap it off with our observations of each QB in each division. Please take note this is NOT a rankings; we have a whole committee dedicated to ranking them. We do not rank here, we just give you insight so you know who you’re playing against, what we see of them, and to bring new names to the forefront for everybody to introduce themselves, and hopefully create some new friendships. Each week, we will dive into a different topic that is centered around our observations. We hope you enjoy! 

Brilliant 

Jeremy “The Blue Baron” Burr picks Robert McConnell off 3 times in the first upset of the D1/D2 crossovers 

Tardy Travis finds Jaime Warren on multiple wide open, deep routes, leads to the second upset in the D1/D2 crossovers 

New Kid Alex of Freeballers mosses Kicak on the last play of the game. 

Sugar, Spice, And Scoring!! CosPlay PowerPuff girls dominate TMA and Two Tuddies only giving up one touchdown. Professor Kyle lets Mayor Cody take over as Quarterback

Money Mike fakes out the defender with a fake pitch and giggles for an extra 7 yards. 

Chad Manning moves down the field throwing the same route to the same girl 3 plays in a row. 

Brett Fiend snatches 3 picks and Katelyn Koester displays athleticism with 3 touchdowns. 

Kelly Kane shows how easy playing football is, goes from QB (scoring) to defender (gets an interception) back to QB to score again. 

Sportsmanship at all time high, common league offenders accept penalty flags without complaint.

Joey Batts spoils third D1/D2 upset by intercepting Jordan Lawson in the red zone and taking it to the one. Next play, he promptly scores.  

Blunders 

Mike Thomas has first career D1 interception, kneels the ball at the 1 yard line, immediately throws an interception. 

Chris Wolcott forced to QB after trying to use illegal QB, wins anyway… 

Every Quarterback tries to launch a deep ball, wind pushes the ball out of bounds or into defenses hands. 

Frodo Swaggins rushers invokes Garbacz’s annoyance, the first time a Ref takes over rush count in TSL history

Disgraced Joey Batt’s loses Field Three’s scorecard.

Kyle Messina slings it to multiple back line receivers, not enough to come up victorious.  

Pete Walbrandt skips THK double header, leads to double beat down by veteran teams.

TSLers prioritize East aurora Music Fest over Lenny and Rameer day; will be haunted by their decisions. 

Steph Infection builds two score lead, Garrett Beesing tries to do Garrett things, and gives the game away with late interception while getting greedy. Lucky for him, they held on to win.

Dylan Jaloza builds lead against Keller Whales before he has to fly to NYC, Bullet club turns it into a tie in the end. 

Quarterback Observations

Division One

Bobby McConnell (Eyes Downtown)

The Mechanical QB of D1, he is a routine QB, methodical, and makes use of all of his weapons. He is also the QB of both the most recent championships (Winter and Fall). Bobby will slice and dice opposing defenses by quickly finding matchups he loves and trusts his receivers to make plays. In the Red Zone, Bobby is lethal and asserts his dominance like no other. 

Joey Batts (Eyes Uptown)

The Heel QB of D1, chances are you’ve been watching (like us) Joey Batts’ game all season long, perhaps even longer. There is a reason for that, he’s a great Quarterback, He wins championships, and he lets you know that he wins. Joey’s voice carries 3 fields over, and most of the time it's in celebration of something phenomenal he has done. The point is he's done it all, and you should see it all. 

Mike Thomas (Sticky Bandits)

The Logical QB of D1, Mike Thomas might not have the ring for D1 yet, but he definitely has the league’s heart. Sticky is known for being methodical, making standard and expected plays again and again, but while watching Mike Thomas’ games, at least once a game there is some Sticky magic that results in some scores. No one and no defense has yet to rattle Mike Thomas as he maintains his composure of being the most level headed QB in the league.  

Garrett Beesing (Frodo Swaggins

The Passionate QB of D1,  Garrett often lets his emotions get the best of him, but that doesn’t mean he self-implodes every game. It means he feels his highs, very high, and his lows with a “punted ball and scream.” Garrett’s offense is prone to a few QB lateral and run plays and utilizing Al and Sal on some deeper routes. Garrett may have been known for having the best hands in the league for many years, but he has shown that he also has a great arm and leadership ability.

Division Two 

Jordan Lawson (Mavericks)

The Passionate QB of D2,  Jordan is often lauded for his strategic gameplay, with a wristband consisting of over 25 plays, but he leads with passion. He can be heard yelling in excitement when big plays are made, but rarely yelling when there is a mistake. His team feeds off of that, but often times when things don’t go well, you can see it on his face. Jordan is great at facilitating the ball to every one of his receivers, rarely leading to gripes about targets from the crew. It is not a topper Saturday without the bellow of Jordan’s voice yelling “Let’s go!”

Ryan Doughtry (Can’t Touch This)

The Strong-Armed QB of D2, Most will say he’s the tall and handsome QB of D2, and that is true, but what everybody knows is Ryan has an absolute CANNON.  Ryan is the one of two Quarterbacks in this division who haven’t fallen from D1’s Grace. Ryan is even-keeled, doesn’t get mad, doesn’t get too hyped, but when they need a full field throw, you can watch him back himself up into the endzone, and deliver an absolute laser into the far end zone. Oh, and to go with that arm, he has a great offensive mind for calling plays.

Dave Eickhoff (Freeballers)

The Wily Vet QB of D2, Dave has been around the block a time of two, and boy does he know how to get players open. Dave doesn’t have the arm like he used to, and he probably will tell you that, but he is strategic. You won’t hear Dave talk too much, but he will deliver wins and consistency that other QB’s just don’t have. 

Jeremy Burr (Untouchaballs)

The Roaring QB of D2, Burr is good, and boy will he let you know it. You get your chance to beat Burr, you better be ready for him to come back, beat you the next time, and let everybody know about it. We love that though, right? Every division needs their antagonist, and Burr plays it so well. He is also a really good QB. Burr has found a collection of great talent, and he gets the best out of them with his leadership and arm. There is a reason his team won the D2 Title in the Fall of 2023, and it's this man who hates sleeves.

Dylan Day (Scared Hitless)

The Lefty QB of D2, and he is the original. Ducking and diving behind the line of scrimmage, sacking Dylan is a task rushers hate. Dylan isn’t always on time with his throws, but he has the elusiveness and candor to make the rusher miss, then find one of his talented receivers open downfield. It helps having some of the best girl athletes in the league too! Feels like every Scared Hitless game is a tight one, and Dylan is a huge reason they are in every game.

Theo Russell (Puckett All Stars)

The Newbie of D2, Theo took over for TJ Ferguson who was the QB of Puckett when they resided in D4. Theo has been regarded as a QB who looks like he’s learning the ropes, but at any moment he might pop. Theo throws a pretty ball that demonstrates he’s an athlete and might have some experience in throwing. Racking up his first win against a short-handed Scared Hitless, we don’t think this win thing will be cut any time soon, even when he faces a full field. 

Division 3

Andy Strug (The Malones)

The New Kid on the block, but maybe not such a new kid? The Malones pile up points, and Andy rarely calls plays for his team, but it just works. Blaring music, free-styling, and throwing up a ton of points is what Andy does, and it just goes without a hitch. The rest of D3 is left wondering, how on earth do they keep doing this? D2 is in his future, whether he likes it or not. 

Frank Laudico (The Wanderers)

The Character QB of D3, Frank is an interesting character, and he wants it that way. Frank and his gaggle of Wanderers have been doing this since some of the young teams of the TSL were in diapers, so they have a system, and it works. When he’s not pissing Sal off, Frank is running his offense to precision and finding his receivers with ease. His girls catch everything, and so do his guys. Is this the session when the Wanderers finish the job? 

Joe Miano (Jabronies)

The quiet QB of D3, but don’t mistake that for lack of confidence. Joe has a strong arm, delivers a beautiful deep ball, and uses that to his advantage a lot. The Jabronies have been playing together so long, they just work smoothly. Andrew Kicak and the ILF crew were spurned by Joe when he returned to the Jabronies, but it has worked out for the better, and he has them right in position for a title. 

Brandon Ford (Practice Squad)

The Loud Mouth QB of D3, and that is not meant in any disrespect! B is awesome, and universally loved by the league, and he is the fearless leader Practice Squad needed. He has led this crew to multiple championships as complete underdogs, but that is how B likes it; Being counted out. Quiet is not in B’s nature, but we love it, and can’t get enough of it. 

Damien Keller (Keller Whales)

The Young Gun QB of D3, Damien took over the QB spot for the Keller Whales, and has shown he could pick this game up quickly. It was just a couple of sessions ago Damien started throwing, and each session he has improved immensely. It really helps to have your entire family as vets of the league, kind of like Charlie Woods having the best golfer of all time as his swing coach. Still some learning curves, but they will be right there in every game as long as Damien is there. 

Alex Buchlis (Let’s Get Reckked)

The Most Sacked QB of D3, Alex is a vet who has done this many times, and while he gets sacked a lot, he also makes plays. The highest-arching passer of the division, he is hyper-intelligent and just knows how this game needs to be played. He also loves to challenge calls he disagrees with, which has led to internal discussions of a replay system. 

Dylan Jaloza (Bullet Club)

The Nice Guy QB of D3, does anybody have a bad thing to say about Dylan? We certainly haven’t. Dylan is the newest leader of Bullet Club, who has had its turns with QB’s over the last few years, but Dylan has them in every game. Dylan has a free-flowing style of play, tries to get everyone involved, but when push comes to shove, he knows he has George Lombardo down there somewhere. Underrated aspect of Dylan’s game: his defense! Not every QB can play both ways like that!

Andy Clark (Buffalo Vice)

The Lefty QB of D3, Andy made the jump up after Buffalo Vice secured their D4 championship in the fall, and he has proven he belongs. Andy loves to dial up routes for his shifty players to get them in space to make plays, and he does a good job of it. We can also categorize him as having quite the arm as well, as he perhaps has the strongest arm in D3. A good combination given the collection of talent he has. 

Brent Dubey (Topper’s All-Stars and Todd)

This section was supposed to be about Patrick McGovern, AKA Topper, but the masses will have to settle for Dubey, as Toppers’ body has broken down once again. Dubey is a vet of the league, so a good replacement (perhaps makes them better?) and has them in every game. With a strong arm and command of the offense, Dubey is just figuring out that chemistry with his targets, and week by week it gets better. 

Division Four

Mitch Bennett (Creekers)

The Most Athletic QB in the division,  Strongest Arm, Tightest Spiral. Mitch not only can chuck the deep ball, which we have seen him do a lot. He can hit his receivers in stride and pick apart defenses. Had a few Blunders in the Cobblestone Game, showing that majestic hair might be his Kryptonite. 

Joey Batts (Cunning Stunts)

The Smartest QB in the division,  Joey maintains his dominance in D4 by having the best girls in the league make routine plays routinely. He gets defenders to jump and wears down rushers by evading then finding open players. Every so often He will launch a ball deep, showing that he can beat you short or long. 

Brandon Ford (Tater Tots)

The QB with the most Games Reffed, Awards, and Touch in the Division. Brandon Ford can join any team and instantly make them a contender. Tater Tots in the past wasn’t much of a threat, but now the girls have mastered B’s favorite route (The Out and Up), the guys are playing with more intensity, and they are winning games, because of One Man, Brandon Ford. 

Buddy Lee (Passing While Intoxicated)

The Most Elusive QB in the division, Rush a guy, rush a girl, rush a sober person, rush an intoxicated person, no one is catching Buddy. Buddy has a knack for duping the rush and then with weird throwing motion putting the ball in his receivers hands. He is currently playing with the best version of PWI. 

Ethan Herbold (Interdimensional Lightning Falcons)

The Stud of the Division,  Ethan is the youngest Quarterback in the Division, sometimes he acts like it by scrambling, and other times he doesn’t, by throwing the ball quickly in of the pocket. He’s got a strong arm like some of his competition and is still learning to throw with some finesse. 

Mike Wolcott (Reset Warriors)

A series of subs have taken over for Michael Wolcott after his injury. Nick Stutzman has subbed the most, and although he is more known for his work on Two Tuddies, where they aren’t thriving very well, but put him in D4, with some tall targets, stellar fast girls, and Nick Stutzman might become the Nick Foles of Reset Warriors (The Eagles version, not the Bears or Jaguars version… we hope). Keep throwing to your girls, whoever is QBing for this team!! They are better than most others in the division. 

Derek Pew (Vaspian)

The Gunslinger of D4,  Derek Pew may have torn his ACL, but this QB won’t let an injury stop him from throwing to the people in orange the ball 30 yards down the field. Derek loves the streaks, posts, and anything deep. We believe once Derek breaks a few more fingers and bruises a few more bodies, he will change his tactics to some gentler throws and routes.

Darryl Carr (CobbleStone)

Daryl is the Legend of D4, Attendance and Chemistry have been plaguing his team as of late. He doesn’t throw the tightest spiral anymore, but he absolutely can throw a receiver open. We are glad Daryl is still in the league, willing to be put in any division. He has a fighter's grit and a personality that is welcoming. 

Carson Wright (Roaring 20’s)

The Quarterback that was placed in too high of a division. Carson is learning the game. He is trending in the right direction, scoring roughly two to three touchdowns a game. Like all new QB’s he struggles against Man Coverage, but once he learns some plays and how to get his girls the ball, he will do just fine… in D5

Division Five

Paul LoVullo (Come From Behind)

The Sage of D5, Paul’s team may not be in first place, but he still has the best arm talent in the division. Paul’s throw maintains a tight spiral, incredible accuracy, and we think he could compete with nearly anyone on any stage. He is currently boasting the most points scored in D5 and is a regular at the bar after a game. We hope all of our QB’s follow Paul’s example as they continue in the league.

John Langley (Travis Henry’s Kids)

The Irregular QB of D5, by this we mean John Langley has moments where he can compete with the best of them, he also has moments where he self-implodes and comes crashing to earth like SpaceX’s Rocket. We also mean that John Langley is irregular since he has already competed with THK in D6, D5, and D4; and proven that he is good and that his team is good. John loves to throw to a deep streak or back line out to his favorite boy Peter. To quote John from the Podcast, his biggest problem “Lord knows I need some girls…” Prayers to you John!

Kyle Conniff (PowderPuff Girls)

The Acrobat QB of D5, and this refers to his ability to scramble, maneuver, and play every other position. Kyle started his career as a gender QB last season on Father Baker, he did so well that he was promoted to the Starting QB this year. Kyle has been great at distributing the ball to all of his top tier female receivers, each week it seems that one of them has some brilliant play that could make a highlight reel. Kyle was a good pick for this squad. 

Kelly Kane (Gucci)

The Trailblazer QB of D5, Kelly is the league’s only female quarterback. Some weeks they only score twice, other weeks they drop 50 points on their opponents. The important thing is that Kelly’s team wins and as we know winning is a QB’s stat. Kelly is smart with the ball, rarely makes mistakes, and knows who trust with the football. 

Raghavan Nagarajan (Not So Sticky) 

The Professor of D5, Raghavan might be the smartest quarterback in the division, maybe all the bottom 3 divisions, but that intellect doesn’t always translate into points. Raghavan doesn’t scramble much which requires his play calling to be heavily reliant on quick routes and finding good matchups. Raghavan’s squad is much more focused on fun, drinking, and making use of the bar than the average team.

Buscaglia Sr. (Stir the Sauce) 

The Gentleman of D5, Former QB of Woodpeckers, as part of that team stems from that old Woodpeckers team awhile back. With age comes experience, and with experience comes wisdom. The best wisdom? Throw the ball to your giant receiver! He might not have the strongest arm in the division, but that football finds the red zone often.

Ryan Henry (TMA)

The Learner of D5, Ryan took over for our beloved Jeff May, who now finds himself in the boxing ring on Saturdays. Ryan has the unfortunate experience of being in D5 without the experience or time played in D6. Sometimes quarterbacks like this excel by sticking around a session or two, dropping down, or watching other teams. Get that paper and clipboard ready!

Nick Stutzman (Two Tuddies)

The Outlier of D5, Nick hasn’t had the same success in D5 yet that he had last season in D6. He maintains Chris Wolcott as a receiver, but chemistry issues plague him with the rest of the team. The jump from D6 to D5 has been tough on the Tuddies QB, who’s been having a much harder time dealing with defenses this season. 

Division Six

Dave Walter (Pit Harade) 

The most lovable QB in D6, Dave Walter took head of Pit Harade, which is Joe K’s lovable bunch of minions who decided to play football, and show Joe how it is done. Dave is not the conventional QB, but he just gets the job done. He knows this game, has played it a while, and has guided Pit Harade from learning the game, to dominating in D6. That speaks volumes!

Alex Staszczyk (Blitzkrieg)

The veteran QB of D6, Alex and Blitzkrieg have been around the block not a few times, but seemingly a million times in D6 still in search of a title. Alex does play like a veteran, calling plays, having code names for a change of play at the line, and that lingo. The problem has always been consistency. Some games higher than Bob Marley at his concerts, or lower than the Oceangate sub. Yes, there are more highs than lows, but if he and the team can gather that consistency, they will get over the hump. 

Buddy Lee (Back that Pass Up)

The Evasive QB of D6, Buddy Lee, whether he has pounded a high noon or not, is by far the most mobile QB in D6. Just ask anybody trying to rush him. Back that Pass Up has gone from a brand new team figuring it out, to a real threat to take the title. It might be a little unfair to have Buddy down in D6, but he has helped a lot of new players learn the game and keep them playing and having fun, so for that, we applaud Buddy (and Alex).

Alex Hill (Sausage McMuffins)

The “oh no, my normal QB never shows up so screw it, I’ll throw” QB of D6, Alex was kind of thrown into the fire when the normal QB just decided to just not show up, and the results have been solid. Alex might not have the strongest arm, but he keeps the ball out of harm's way, which is what you need to do obviously. He has a knack for finding his girls and piling up touchdowns with them, which as we know, is a recipe for success at any level.  

Phil Maiarana (Mighty Drunks)

The Joy of D6, every time we’ve watched Phil play he seems to be enjoying himself and his teammates. Sometimes it seems like Phil and the drunks have it figured out, other times it seems like he’s learning the game still. He’s able to find open receivers and score in the endzone. We would like to seem him be a bit more mighty in the coming weeks. 

Chad Manning (Balls Deep)

The Future of D6, Chad is a tall, wide-eyed Quarterback who currently sits in the middle of the pack. Balls Deep is a newer team, though the name has been used hundreds of times in this league. Chad needs to find some set plays to move the field faster and with more efficiency. 

Gavin Medole (Just Joshing)

The Student of D6, there has been a week by week improvement for the QB of Just Joshing. While everyone wants to win, we also want to see improvement. That’s what this guy does, little by little each game they get better, fewer mistakes, and more points. 

Kyle Messina (Sticky Laces)

The Socialite of D6, Kyle has been in the football circles for years, but has brought his arm talent to TSL. Kyle has the experience and appreciation for the game to be successful, but as all QB’s know the transition from other leagues to the big time can be a challenge. We’ve seen him do some great things and will watch his career with great interest. 

Dominic C(Dogg Pound)

The Figuring it out QB of D6, Insert Name was thrust into action as QB after an injury to Dog Pound’s usual QB. While it took a little bit of time, Insert Name started using some strategy to his play calling, rallied the troops and got their first TSL win last week. Do we smell an underdogg story??

That’s it for this week! See you all Saturday!