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Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 28 April 2023 13:03
Published: Friday, 28 April 2023 13:03
Written by Jeff Krol
Hits: 28

And we’re off! 


The Spring 2023 session of the TSL officially began last weekend, as the Race for Social Co-Ed Immortality got off to a rousing start. It was a fantastic day, if you played at 10:00. After that, I received multiple reports of wind, rain, “sideways rain from the wind”, and it was a bit chilly as the day continued. On the plus side, we finished every single game. On the minus side, it wasn’t as telling a ‘Week 1’ as it should’ve been. 


But none of that matters, because in my over ten years of doing this, I’ve come to learn that Week 1 is NEVER a good representation of how the season goes. So how is one supposed to know what was a good example of what is to come and what was just a Week 1 mirage? 


Well, you get me to tell you. My extremely keen eye has been trained over the years to accurately recognize these sorts of things. 




-Goatsack and Scared Hitless both got shut out this weekend, but don’t expect that trend to continue. While they were lucky enough to play in the “good” weather hours (11:00 was mostly dry?) they didn’t play *that* bad. Some end zone interceptions for Goatsack did them in (which happens against Come From Behind) and Scared Hitless was shaking off the rust, missing some people, and went up against Sticky Bandits who had just won the indoor league and were much more ready to go. 


-The Tater Tots started the season off with a loss, but I’m attributing most of that to them only having one female to start the game and Derek Pew still needing to get used to his receivers. Trying to do all of that in terrible weather means an uninspiring loss that won’t matter as time goes on. 



-Grey Hair Don’t Care looked like they’re for real last weekend, going head to head with Eyes Downtown in a close loss before dismantling Frodo Swaggins. They’ve got some new jerseys and they’re in a “look good, feel good” state of mind. 


-Let's Get Reccked was reportedly dominant over the Jabronies last weekend, and it seems like adding Buchlis and Baker to the team really has them going in the right direction. 



-Wanderers showed they belonged this weekend, gutting out a tough win over Degeneration Sexxy after a close loss to Bullet Club. They’re 100% going to be in the mix for the D3 championship. 


-Southside is scary good in D6, and they should be considered the favorites to win the division from here on out. 

-Frodo Swaggins is going to be overmatched in D1.

The point of all this is simple: it doesn’t matter how good or how bad you looked in Week 1. We still have a LOT of football left for you to get better (or for everything to go really, really wrong). 

Now let’s get to the games: 




Last Week’s Games:


Sticky Bandits 37, Scared Hitless 0

Losing Streak 22, Tight Ends In Motion 8

Eyes Downtown 27, Grey Hair Don’t Care 20

Legends 45, Frodo Swaggins 14

Grey Hair Don’t Care 40, Frodo Swaggins 10

Sticky Bandits start off hot against Scared Hitless as they cruise to an easy victory to start the season off right. Losing Streak makes a statement that they’re in this as a serious D1 contender, playing strong against a TEIM squad that is still figuring things out in their little roster shake up they had. Eyes Downtown came out victorious against a VERY spry GHDC team who looked very good in defeat, and then even better in a dominant victory over Frodo Swaggins. Things didn’t go well for Frodo at all last weekend, as they also lost to the Legends, who were starting their backup QB and still managed to put up 45 points. 

This Week’s Games:


Legends vs Sticky Bandits (EVEN) - What a way to kick off the day for the TSL! The defending outdoor champs vs the indoor champions. Both of these teams have title aspirations and they both looked very, very good last week in blowout victories. I’m expecting a very close game where the first team that blinks on offense will lose the game. For whatever reason, I feel like that’s going to be Sticky. LEGENDS BY 3


Eyes Downtown vs Frodo Swaggins (+17) - 17 points is a pretty steep line, but I’m not the one that makes the lines. Eyes Downtown looked pretty sharp last week, even in the elements. Frodo looked like a team that needs a little more time to get it together. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and being a contending D1 team takes a little more time than one week. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 15


Losing Streak vs Scared Hitless (+10) - Losing Streak looked right at home last weekend, cruising to a victory over TEIM. Scared Hitless looked pretty much the opposite of that. As I mentioned before though, Scared Hitless shouldn’t be assumed to be a cake walk. They’ve proven time and again that they sometimes start slow but if you sleep on them, you’ll get beat. They’re deserving of your respect. In this battle though, as long as Losing Streak doesn’t come into this game thinking it’ll be easy, they won’t be upset. LOSING STREAK BY 7



Last Week’s Games:


No Punt Intended 32, Untouchaballs 31

No Punt Intended 27, Mavericks 26

Untouchaballs 21, Freeballers 15

Freeballers 34, Practice Squad 29

D2 last week: 4 games, 5 teams, all one score games. Ladies and Gentlemen, D2 is going to be absolutely awesome all year. Like you, when I saw that D2 was only going to have 5 teams this year, I was bummed. It made me long for the years where D2 was the most fun division in the league. Well, we might be back to that. If every game is going to be a close one like this, where anyone can win at any time? This is going to be FUN. There are no stragglers in this division, and every team should’ve walked away last week thinking they could win the title. No Punt Intended is 2-0 after two straight one point wins over Untouchaballs and the Mavericks, who were up 26-0 at one point. The Untouchaballs went 1-1 after a close loss to NPI but they rebounded to beat the Freeballers. The Freeballers then went on to go 1-1 themselves after beating Practice Squad in PS’ D2 Debut. All of these teams are going to be better. Everyone is going to be awesome. D2 is must see Social Co-Ed Football. 

This Week’s Games:


Untouchaballs vs Mavericks (+3) - One of the least surprising reports my field spies sent me was that Jeremy Burr was DEALING last Saturday. He was VERY close to being 2-0, and there’s a good chance he spent most of the last week lamenting that loss. The Mavericks might have gotten too cocky when they got out to a big lead and that cost them in the end, so hopefully they’ve already learned not to assume that they have a game in hand. This should be fun, but I’ll roll with Burr right now. UNTOUCHABALLS BY 3


No Punt Intended vs Freeballers (+3) - NPI went to 2-0 against arguably their toughest two competitors in D2, but like I said earlier, this can be anyone’s division. If the Freeballers are for real, this is the game for them to show everyone in the TSL they can win this division. Right now, it feels like they’re a step behind, but it’s a baby step. And that baby step is what ruins them this week. NO PUNT INTENDED BY 2.


Mavericks vs Freeballers (+1) - While I don’t think any game is a “must win”, as soon as I typed “Mavericks vs Freeballers” that’s the feeling I got. Considering that I’m currently saying both of these teams are going to lose their first games, I think both teams are going to come into this one with a little more desire to get into the win column. The Freeballers don’t want to be 1-3, and the Mavericks don’t want to be 0-3. That means we’ll get some fun football here. But I think the Mavericks will pull this out. MAVERICKS BY 2.



Last Week’s Games:


Bullet Club 42, Can’t Touch This 37

Bullet Club 38, Wanderers 34

Wanderers 31, Degeneration Sexxy 28

Let’s Get Reccked 28, Jabronies 7


Bullet Club picks up where they left off last season, getting out to a 2-0 record with last minute wins over Can’t Touch This and the Wanderers. The Wanderers would go on to win a close one in their next game against Degeneration Sexxy. Let's Get Reccked handled the Jabronies pretty easily. A lot of exciting games in D3 so far, and we haven’t even seen Vaspian and Itches and Ohs play yet either. I don’t think a favorite has truly shown themselves here just yet. 

This Week’s Games: 


Bullet Club vs Vaspian (+7) - Vaspian makes a jump up to D3 after getting Drew Colosimo back on the roster after a few seasons Drew-less in D4. Their first game is against the 2-0 Bullet Club, who looked good, but not great last week. Vaspian has been known for having some very good defense, and with Travis Henry’s Kids playing at the same time as BC this week, I’d wager that they’ll be missing Pete (bad thing) and Langley (good thing). This all adds up to a Vaspian “upset” of sorts. VASPIAN BY 6


Can’t Touch This vs Jabronies (EVEN) - Both teams lost last week, but one of these teams looked good doing it. Can’t Touch This had a battle with Bullet Club and they took the lead late before giving up a late TD to lose at the end. Multiple eyewitness reports said that CTT looked really good, like they’re about to take the next step in their development. The Jabronies have the knowledge on how to be successful in this league, and maybe last week was an aberration, but until they show me otherwise, I'll just go with the trends. CAN'T TOUCH THIS BY 6


Wanderers vs Let’s Get Reccked (+3) - The Wanderers had the impressive debut that everyone thought they would. They were very close to starting out 2-0, and were as good as advertised. Let’s Get Reccked turned a few heads with a dominating win over the Jabronies after jumping up two divisions. This should be a great back and forth between two smart teams. WANDERERS BY 1


Degeneration Sexxy vs Itches and Ohs (+8) - Itches and Ohs gets back on the field this week for the first time this season. The Ohs have had mixed results in D3 so far, and things aren’t going to get any easier after losing Laura for the season. I’m not sure how they attempted to replace that productivity. They get a Degeneration Sexxy team that looked good in defeat last week, as the Kellers continue to play smart football. They still have all-world WR Katie Keller, and a host of talent for Scotty Dro to fire the ball at. DEGENERATION SEXXY BY 10



Last Week’s Games:


Buffalo Vice 38, Baadies 33

Travis Henry’s Kids 39, Cobblestone 13


Not a ton of action in D4, as only half the division had games last week. Buffalo Vice started the season off right with a win over the Baadies, who looked good in defeat. Garrett was on the TSL Podcast this week (listen on Spotify!) taking blame for the loss, but everyone already knew it was going to be his fault. Travis Henry’s Kids had an easy time navigating the elements in a win over Cobblestone, who were a bit shorthanded anyway. Still, a good start for THK. 

This Week’s Games:


Travis Henry’s Kids vs Passing While Intoxicated (+3) - THK gets a tougher test this week as they take on the defending D5 champions in PWI, who moved up to D4 this season. PWI is largely the same exact team as they were before, so it may take them a minute to adjust to the step up in competition. THK adding Aaron from TOX will turn out to pay dividends as Langley can’t possibly throw to Pete on every play. Right? TRAVIS HENRY’S KIDS BY 7


Baadies vs Passing While Intoxicated (+6) - Baadie’s Angels look to get their first win of the season after nearly capturing it a week ago. While PWI has played together for a bit, they haven’t had to play a gender team of this caliber before, and they may not be able to keep pace. The PWI Ladies are solid but none of them can really hold up with the Angels, and I expect Garrett to exploit those mismatches. BAADIES BY 13


Buffalo Vice vs Cunning Stunts (EVEN) - It’s always a good game when these two teams meet, so this should be no different. Vice gets the pleasure of getting the gender teams out of the way early in the schedule, and they usually perform very well against them regardless. I think getting the Stunts in their first game of the season will be helpful, and Vice moves to 2-0. BUFFALO VICE BY 4


Puckett All-Stars vs Baadies (+6) - Puckett was very, very good last season. They’ve had 6 months to really think about how they should’ve been D4 champions, and I think they’re coming back with a vengeance to win it all this season. I expect them to be pretty fired up for this one. They’re talented all around, and they have some sneaky good females to help them keep pace. PUCKETT ALL-STARS BY 3


Cobblestone vs Creekers (+6) - The Creekers are a brand new team that I don't believe have played a down yet in an organized league. Darryl Carr QB Superstar alone has played 3,259,505 snaps. The Creekers get to play football royalty off the bat, and Darryl is going to eat their “learn defense on the fly” defense up. COBBLESTONE BY 20, DARRYL WILL LOOK AWESOME



Last Week’s Games: 


Come From Behind 32, Goatsack! 0

TMA 30, Gucci 26

ILF 20, Tater Tots 13

Not So Sticky 18, Long Balls 7

D5 gave us a lot to think about. Come From Behind welcomed Goatsack to the league in a 32-0 drubbing, but reports were positive that Goatsack should be fine. CFB, meanwhile, looks like a big D5 contender this time around. TMA showed that they’re going to be just fine without half of their team as they took a close game against Gucci, who also looked really good in their return to the TSL. ILF snuck out a victory over the Tots who were still learning how to gel with their new QB. And Not So Sticky got a win as the D6 champs from the Fall welcomed the Long Balls into the league the only way they know how. Fun football. 

This Week’s Games:


Goatsack vs Long Balls (+3) - Okay, so these teams may have only combined for 7 points total last week, but Goatsack gets tons of credit for really showing up where it counts: The Bar. These teams were playing some very good D5 title contenders right out of the gate, so the view is skewed on them slightly. This should be an excellent matchup, and in this case, give me the team that’s played together for forever. GOATSACK! BY 13


Not So Sticky vs Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (+7) - With Andrew Kicak throwing for ILF, their chances of winning dramatically decline. I say this, fully knowing that they’re 1-0 right now. But Not So Sticky knows Andrew pretty well, and they’re 100% going to exploit his lack of talents this week. NOT SO STICKY BY 12, KICAK THROWS TWO PICKS. 


Come From Behind vs Tater Tots (+7) - Come From Behind is looking like the early D5 favorites, and why shouldn’t they? They have a perfect mix of old and new talent, they represent well at the bar, and they’re in the mix EVERY YEAR. This shouldn’t be a surprise. The Tater Tots start a little slow every Spring, mainly because they’ve been missing in the Fall, and they always seem to be breaking in a new QB. But once they click, watch out. I think this is another week of “figuring it out”. COME FROM BEHIND BY 9



Last Week’s Games:


Southside 43, Back That Pass Up 12

Grass Eaters 38, Mighty Drunks 15

Southside 30, Two Tuddies 20

Sausage McMuffins 12, Balls Deep 6

Week 1 cemented Southside’s status as the team to beat in D6. They took Back That Pass Up to the woodshed, before beating the Two Tuddies by double digits as well. That’s one way to make a statement, and I see you. The Grass Eaters welcomed the Mighty Drunks to the league with a loss, and the Sausage McMuffins, who I’ve been told literally have shirts with Sausage McMuffins on them (and that’s fantastic), squeaked by Balls Deep. 

This Week’s Games: 


Sausage McMuffins vs Back That Pass Up (EVEN) - Both teams played hard last week, and both teams walked away with scoring 12 points a piece. That tells me we’re going to see a bit of a defensive battle this time around, or maybe it's offensive ineptitude? I think we’ll see a pretty fun back and forth game, but when all is said and done, give me the McMuffins because it’s more fun to say. SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS BY 5


Blitzkrieg vs Pit Harade (+10) - If there’s any team that will stand up to Southside, it's going to be Blitzkrieg. It’s the Spring session, and I was so politely reminded that Alex. Is. Back. BK’s biggest issue is always “who’s going to be the QB”, but not when Alex is there. He’s the leader of the offense, and the guy who knows the secret to Blitzkrieg’s success: Throw to Light Red Hoodie Guy. Pit Harade is going to have a hell of a time in their first game against these guys. I don’t know many names on this roster, but they at least have a QB in Nick Hawes, and a nice offensive line in Joe K and Dave Walter. That probably won’t be enough. BLITZKRIEG BY 16


Blitzkrieg vs Mighty Drunks (+10) - Blitzkrieg continues to ease into the season with another new team that’s still figuring things out. BK is essentially playing their preseason games now as they stroll to 2-0. BLITZKRIEG BY 10


Balls Deep vs Pit Harade (+3) - Balls Deep might have an advantage for not being what seems like a  mostly new team here. Plus, there are Spinelli’s players all over the place in this one. Balls Deep struggled to score last week, but that may have been more due to the weather than anything. BALLS DEEP BY 3




  • Are We Playing Football? That’s the best question yet again this week. I just checked the weather, and it looks like it’s going to rain in Buffalo all day today and tomorrow. I don’t know if the games are going to be canceled or not, and Jeff Krol has proceeded to email the captains yet again to be on standby for any alerts about the cancellation of games. I know they’ll try to get as many in as possible. 




  • How was the bar scene last week? It was awesome from what I’ve been told! Many teams across many divisions stuck around and drank outside and inside. The jukebox was rocking and everyone was having a good time. Many new teams were hanging out: Goatsack, Gucci, Wanderers, while the usuals were also there: Come From Behind, everyone who played on the DILFs but they’re on other teams now, etc. Just to name a few. If these rumored bar specials show up soon, it’s only going to get better. 




  • How is Breakfast Club looking? It’s looking great. The rosters I was shown are the most even across the board that we’ve had in a long time. There isn’t a stand out team that “should” dominate, and there isn’t a team that you look at and go “oh, they’re probably the worst one”. The girls did a great job drafting, and we may get the most competitive Breakfast Club ever. If you didn’t sign up this season, I’d STRONGLY encourage you to take a chance and do it in the fall. 




  • How can I get on the podcast? Where do I listen? If you want your weekly dose of the TSL podcast, you can listen to it either on the website, or on Spotify. However, I’ve been told that very soon you’ll be able to listen to the podcast on a bunch of different mediums, so there’s a good chance your preferred podcast listening method will be on there. If you want to be on to talk about your game, your team, or whatever just ask Jeff Krol, Joe K, Garrett, Travis, Topper if he’s there, or whoever and they’ll get you on. The more people the better. 




  • Did you sign a waiver? People who haven’t signed a waiver yet will not be allowed to play on Saturday, so quit monkeying around and get to it! 





  • Breakfast Club Predictions: 
  • Liddle Dubs 24, Steph Infection 20
  • The VaJennas 34, BDSM 25
  • The Ash Slinging Slashers 40, Komosexuals 33




  • There are a LOT of team names that have to do with Asses, Balls, etc. Let’s get a little more original here people. 




  • The Games of the Day: 
  • 10:00 - Legends vs Sticky Bandits
  • 11:00 - Goatsack vs Long Balls
  • 12:00 - Freeballers vs Mavericks
  • 1:00 - ILF vs Not So Sticky
  • 2:00 - BAADies vs Puckett All-Stars
  • 3:00 - Degeneration Sexxy vs Itches and Ohs




  • No, I don’t know if we’ll be able to get all of the games played if we get rained out. I know that the lack of an extra field really hinders that. So unless there are games at 8am (yuck) or 4pm (also yuck), or on random Thursday (might be cool?) we may just have some ties coming into play. 




  • The schedule for the first week of the playoffs has been released to your captains. There will NOT be any game switching or any shenanigans associated with that. You have nearly two months to figure out how to be there. 




  • Captains were also supplied with a handy dandy “what color do the other teams in my division wear?” sheet this week. One of the many improvements since Topper stopped doing as much. If you see you’re playing someone that’s wearing the same color, just have everyone bring a white (or black, or whatever) shirt with them that week. 




  • Speaking of Topper, will he actually show up at the fields this week or does he have some important business things to pretend to be at? The world wants to know! 




  • Congratulations to the entire league for being in B’s Brother’s presence last weekend. We can only hope to see him expertly scouting the women in the league for his future gender team once again this Saturday. 




  • Apparently there were a lot of cans, bottles, and trash scattered throughout the fields last weekend. If you can help it, pick up after yourself. Animals. 




  • I’ve just been informed that APPARENTLY if you have any issues with the Power Rankings committee, you’re now supposed to email me about it and I get to email Topper to send them your gripes? This should go well. If you have any issues with that, or if you want to get the correct publicity for your players, OR you have information on the games you played in, take a few minutes and email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.! Sadly, my old email (and my years of correspondence with all of you) will be going away soon. 


That's all for this week. Week 2 is upon you, and it looks like you’re going to get wet again. Have fun with that. 




Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 21 April 2023 16:28
Published: Friday, 21 April 2023 16:28
Written by Jeff Krol
Hits: 31

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, your wait is over. On Saturday, April 22nd in the Year of Our Lord 2023, after six long months, the reigning, defending, undisputed, best Social Co-Ed Football Experience of all time, the TSL, will return! Starting tomorrow, 52 teams across 7 competitive divisions will descend upon the Lenny Alba Fields behind The Angry Buffalo @ The Rose Garden as the Race For Social Co-Ed Football Immortality begins anew. 


For those of you that don’t know me, I’m The Godfather. For nearly 12 years I’ve provided the TSL with expert insights, nearly flawless game predictions, and perhaps spilled the tea about the behind the scenes stuff going on in the league. I used to play in the league many moons ago, but unfortunately life has taken me in a different direction: Des Moines, Iowa. I live in my log cabin with my family here, and in an effort to stay a part of the league, I’ve been writing this article. (Okay, and maybe I have a journalism degree I’m not using, so this sort of justifies it to me as well.) It used to be a lot easier to do this, as Lenny, Rameer, Topper, and a host of other super secret league informants used to send me TONS of information that made writing this article a breeze. 


Now, due to the tragic losses the TSL has been through the last few years, most of the information I get comes from you, the players of the league. It’s really simple. If you have someone on your team that’s just balling out, and deserves recognition? You email me and tell me about them. If there’s a secret B’s Brother love triangle forming between him and two other ladies of the league? You give me that info immediately. If you want to call out Bobby McConnell for being a weirdo before your big game against him? This is the place (Hey Jonny Football!). The point is, I love chatting with league members, whether they’re the captain of a juggernaut D1 squad, or the D6 guy who’s new to the league that got Mossed by one of our amazing females that we have here. Give me all the information, and you’ll get the publicity you seek. 


So about a week ago it was time to start warming up for this article. It’s always a highly sought after publication after all, I go to sign into my email and see who messaged me over the offseason (There’s usually a few of you that pop in to say hello). And the craziest thing happened. I couldn’t sign in to my mailbox. Figuring Topper had to reset my password over the winter or something, I reached out to him only to find that my old email has been shut down. For super important Topper legal reasons, apparently, we’re having to move websites and stuff. And that means I have to move my email address. I don’t like change, but here we are. So from here on out, if you’re going to email me, I’ll need you to reach out to me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.


I know, I don’t like it either, but as always, go yell at Topper. And if Topper isn’t there, go yell at Travis Cleavenger-Bernal, because most of the league already loves yelling at him anyway. Change is scary, but it’s not all bad. I’ve spent the last week talking to Topper and Jeff Krol a lot about everything and there’s still some cool things happening. Topper isn’t gone forever (as evidenced by the photos he was sending me of him at the recent Breakfast Club draft), so calm down. And yeah, Jeff is taking the lead on all things that Topper doesn’t want to do anymore like emailing captains, setting up the waiver system, etc, etc. I guess there’s a new website on the way, and maybe even a new logo and other fun surprises. If anything, things will be significantly more efficient around the TSL, and Topper will be free to start up his own winery, but in reality he’ll just get another dog or two and still have pool parties for league members. 


What else do we need to touch on? Ah yes, B’s Brother should be back in full force. I believe Cookie and Elmo both signed long term contract extensions as well. The Breakfast Club is back and the teams look about as even as they ever have! The league has seen some interesting roster shuffling, we actually have a full D1, and some WNY Social Co-Ed Football Legends have finally joined the TSL. The podcast will be back, so if you want to be on the show, let someone know! The TSL QB Power Rankings Committee will be back. There is talk that The Sentinel may not have renewed their contract this season, so if you’re in the mood to write a weekly article (or even just one) that we toss up on the website with your own thoughts on everything, let Jeff, Travis, Joe K, Garrett, Elmo, B’s Brother, 40 Year Plan Guy, Topper, Langley, or whoever else seems moderately important to you know, and we can make it happen. This league runs on its players, so your help will always be welcomed. 


That is a lot of nonsense. And we haven’t even gotten into what you’re really all here for: the football and my expert analysis. So, let’s get to it. 



Championship Odds: 


Legends (4-1)

Eyes Downtown (4-1)

Sticky Bandits (6-1)

Tight Ends In Motion (10-1)

Losing Streak (12-1)

Scared Hitless (20-1)

Frodo Swaggins (25-1)

Grey Hair Don’t Care (100-1)


Preseason Hype: Yes, you’re seeing this correctly. The toughest division in Social Co-Ed Football is back to heights we haven’t seen in years! After a few “weak” years with only 6 teams, D1 is back up to 8 teams, and for the most part we realistically have 5-6 teams that can definitely win this thing. We’ll start at the top with the Legends. Travis Cleavenger-Bernal has been Rameer Reincarnated with his ability to steal other teams’ best players the last few seasons as the Legends ran over a historically weak D1. But now, like any team in a championship window, he’s losing players as Chris Nelson has left, Boccio claims to be “not playing” (which is code for “Diana doesn’t want me to get hurt before the wedding”, which is ironic considering her current state), and I think I was just told that Heather is moving away from the area. Tough losses, so of course Travis went out and signed Melanie Linsmair and Shbend to cover the losses. The Legends aren’t as good as they’ve been in the past, and the competition around them is better. The point? D1 is wide open. Sensing the blood in the water, Bobby has more than likely spent all winter forcing his team to practice so they can be at their best once the season kicks off. Yes, he’s insane, but at the same time he knows what he’s doing. As long as he gets his teammates to drink the Kool-Aid, ED will always be dangerous. Bobby is blessed with talented females around him like Kayla Voss, Mackenzie Neary, and Emily Belfield. And then his males are as good as anyones with Delecki, Ben Stack, and Nick Angelo, just to name a few. Blase LaDuca is there for some reason too, I’ll assume he offered to pay the entire team fee or something. The Sticky Bandits won the winter league this offseason, and they’re looking to ride that momentum into a D1 championship. While they boast the same talented and fast males they always have (Dean, Brian, Adrian, Kevin Zack…how do you cover all that speed? You don’t.), the big news out of Sticky Nation is that they’re down Christine Krol and Laura Streeter this season as both are on the IR with “Pregnancy”. Nothing kills a D1 title run faster than conception, that’s for sure. But fear not, Sticky was just fine in indoor leaning on the perennially underrated and underestimated Nicole Sharick shouldering the load. They still have Missy Keem as well, and they added Brandy Clarke and a “starting the season on the IR but might be back?” Misty Himes as well. That’s how you supplement your roster, folks. Tight Ends In Motion is back for more fun, but they’re not your father’s TEIM. Word is that Bro Kleckler is no longer throwing, which is a shame, but there’s no way they make that call without a better replacement plan in place, right? RIGHT? TEIM still boasts super tall Derek and a couple of Daves, not to mention arguably the best females top to bottom on the roster. Katie, Cheryl, Lindsey, Margo, and Emma are just all studs, and whoever shows up should give TEIM an advantage. Losing Streak returns after a sabbatical back home. Apparently, winning by 86 every week loses its luster, and Jordan has returned to capture a D1 title. And he’s got some friends with him. You know the usual names: Ralph, Keyon, Chris Nelson. But Jordan got what eluded him last time: a stable of talented females. He got all world female Robin Makula out of “sort of” retirement, he plucked Crystal Carlson from her team, and he has Britney Matthews as well. That was what he was missing last time, and Losing Streak has a real chance to take the D1 crown. Scared Hitless stays in D1 after some arguably mixed results last season. Good for them. Even though they lost Mel to Legends, SH still trots out some excellent females (Jaimie Warren? Cat? Molly? Carly? Pfft, they’ll be just fine) and as long as Rawdog doesn’t screw anything up for them, the males are very, very good as well. As always, it comes down to QB play. Dylan Day proceeds to be the deciding factor in most games for Scared Hitless, and when he’s on, SH can beat anyone. But when he’s off, and people miss games, they look out of place. This team has arguably the biggest gap between their floor and ceiling of any D1 teams. They’re the true wild card of the division. Frodo Swaggins comes strutting into D1 after a relatively easy D2 title win last Fall. Garrett has been pretty damn good as he transitions from washed up WR to “extending my playing career” QB. This team is tall, with CJ and Blake Fisher, and they got Josh Schnieder to turn in his Sticky jersey to stay with Frodo. John Costa has been in the gym, so you know he’s ready. Garrett has pretty much overturned his females this season, going out and getting Katie Swanson from Spinelli’s (who have broken up for this season), and names I’ve never heard before like Sarah Coatsworth and Tori Leighbody. There’s zero way Garrett gets them to play if they can’t ball out though, right? There’s a lot of question marks here, and it FEELS like this might be a learning season, and we’ll see some real good football in the fall. Finally, Grey Hair Don’t Care might be a little out of their league this time around. Yes, Amber Hay is an All-Star. Yes, Nick Voss can change a game. Yes, George Lombardo is underrated. But there are a lot of names here that I don’t know, and whispers have started that Dave Eickhoff is starting to lose it a little. So unless Dylan is there to throw, which I doubt he is, This team is a step behind for sure. If Dave starts off rough, look for a QB Controversy to develop. 

Preseason Prediction: D1 is fun again. That’s the prediction. I don’t think we’ll see a tremendous gap between the top 2 teams and everyone else or something. When the smoke clears however, I think you’ll be seeing Losing Streak taking the title from the Legends in the final. They’ve patched up their biggest holes, they’ve learned a bit more, and as long as Jordan keeps his composure, they can do this. 

This Week’s Games:


Sticky Bandits vs Scared Hitless (+7) - Sticky is coming off a very good indoor session, and they’re the more complete team right now. A perfect team to start the season against when you’re working in new players. I’m sure that had nothing to do with Krol making the schedule. Nope. Scared Hitless will take this to really shake off the rust from the winter, but they’ll keep it close. STICKY BANDITS BY 4


Losing Streak vs Tight Ends In Motion (EVEN) - Pretty big matchup out of the gate, but that’s what we’re going to see weekly in D1. Overall, i think TEIM is a little better (ignore the prediction), but working in a new QB against a team that has played together for forever isn’t the best start. LOSING STREAK BY 9


Legends vs Frodo Swaggins (+14) - It’s a hell of a welcome to D1 for Frodo to take on the Legends out of the gate, but I can also imagine Garrett not wanting it any other way. If you really want to see what your team needs to work on this season, going up against the Gold Standard right away is a quick way to find your holes. And if Garrett does anything, it’s find holes. LEGENDS BY 10


Eyes Downtown vs Grey Hair Don’t Care (+17) - Both of these teams will wear grey, i just know it. Bobby, wear the red ones. ED was apparently a well oiled machine in the indoor league, and I was told GHDC struggled a bit. I hope to be wrong, but GHDC doesn’t feel like they’re on the same level here. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 22


Frodo Swaggins vs Grey Hair Don’t Care (+6) - Double header to start the season for both teams, that’s always fun. Neither team will be rested at all when you consider they’ll both get a top contender in the division the hour before. This game won’t be a complete test for either side. It’ll come down to the wire in this one. FRODO SWAGGINS BY 3



Championship Odds:


No Punt Intended (4-1)

Mavericks (5-1)

Untouchaballs (7-1)

Practice Squad (8-1)

Freeballers (20-1)


Preseason Hype: D2 is just, weird. We only got 5 teams into this division, largely as a result of it no longer being “D1 lite” as the D1 worthy teams moved up, and then we had some sad departures from the league this time around (RIP Dilfs). After the smoke has cleared, however, we get No Punt Intended looking like the front runners here. NPI was pretty damn good the last time we saw them, and adding TCB and getting the return of Casey Lawler means good luck to the other squads that try to keep up with her and Amber. That’s a LOT of speed. The Mavericks come in as a new team that allegedly has some pretty good talent on it. There are definitely some names on this roster (Manny Batcho, Ant Cordova) that I’ve heard before, so Jordan’s D2 team looks to have some firepower as well. I’m positive Jordan will email me more about the others on his roster so I have more to say later on. So it’ll be fine. The Untouchaballs are here, and they have Jeremy Burr throwing the ball to what seems to be the same team they’ve had. That isn’t meant to be a slight, the UTs have been very good for quite some time and they’ll 100% be in the mix for a title. Tell me if you’ve heard this before: Practice Squad won their division last season, and moved up. PS has made the long climb from D6, but they’re checking all of the boxes along the way. They won D3 last season from the 8 seed, furthering the proof that once B figures out the faster defenses, they can beat anyone. The team is largely the same (B, Kelly, Renee, and about 52 dudes named Kyle), only losing Jamie McCabe to Untouchaballs. PS has a very, very good chance to win yet another title, and at this point, I wouldn’t be surprised to see them in D1 in the fall. And finally, the Freeballers. They got a bit better this offseason, adding Adrian Cannon and a returning Brittany Clarke to the team, which can only help. They’re talented, for sure, but they still feel like they’re a bit behind the other teams. On the plus side, I didn’t put them at 100-1 this time. 


Preseason Prediction: At the end of the day, B’s Brother once again inspires Practice Squad to yet another championship, as they upset No Punt Intended in the finals. 


This Week’s Games:


No Punt Intended vs Untouchaballs (+3) - NPI looks to finish what they started last season as they loaded up for a title run. But the Untouchaballs have the better QB and arguably the best female on the field in Melanie. This is the potential Game of the Day right here. NO PUNT INTENDED BY 1, BURR FURIOUS ABOUT A REF CALL THAT “COST HIM THE WIN”.


No Punt Intended vs Mavericks (EVEN) - A team coming off a game against a brand new team looking to make a statement in their first game in the TSL. Always a good mix. I’ll take the team looking to make noise this time around. MAVERICKS BY 5


Untouchaballs vs Freeballers (+7) - With the Untouchaballs fired up about losing the first game by a point, they proceed to take it out on the Freeballers who just always feel disjointed and like they’re figuring it out until about midseason when they win two games they shouldn’t have and get people (it’s me, I’m people) thinking they can win it all. UNTOUCHABALLS BY 10


Practice Squad vs Freeballers (+3) - This should be a pretty good matchup for sure. Despite me selecting PS for the eventual D2 championship, they’ve started slow in recent seasons (of course me saying that will only fire them up and I’ll prove myself wrong now) as they adjust to another new division. FREEBALLERS BY 3



Championship Odds: 


Wanderers (3-1)

Bullet Club (5-1)

Jabronies (8-1)

Degeneration Sexy (11-1)

Can’t Touch This (15-1)

Itches and Ohs (22-1)

Let’s Get Reccked (30-1)

Vaspian (35-1)


Preseason Hype: It happened. After 27 years, and 3,258 championships in other leagues, the Wanderers have FINALLY, FINALLY, FINALLY accepted my long standing weekly invitation to join the TSL to see where they stand here. This team has been a well oiled machine for decades, and while they’re a bit older, and changed a few parts (I’m sure) they’re still a force to be reckoned with. They’ll have to take a second or two to adjust to the TSL game (not having 4 minutes to throw, for example) but once they do, look out. D3 might be a little too low for them, but it’s smart for them to figure out the game first and then move up. I can’t wait. Bullet Club comes back pretty much completely intact from last season’s 7-2 team. They’re just solid to great all around, and they still have the division’s best player in Pistol Pete. Losing Crystal will sting, but hopefully the new girls on the roster can be a bright spot and help overcome that loss. The Jabronies have always been a good team when they play. Despite Eric Klecker’s hatred of potted plants, he loves playing good football. This team has a few names I’ve seen before like Mike McKenrick and the underrated Lindsey West, and with Joe Miano throwing, they’ll be a tough out each week. Degeneration Sexy is this year’s version of “The Kellers”. They picked up a couple of the defunct Dilfs (still sad) like Kellie Mazur and Valerie Bernal, so they’ve only gotten better. Assuming they make the correct choice and have Scott Sr. throwing over Scotty Dro, they can easily contend for the title. Can't Touch This seems to be the same team, but that’s a good thing. They’re still relatively new to the league and continuity can only help them. Ryan throws the ball about as far as anyone in the league, and their skill guys and the ladies keep improving. They’re a chic pick for “Most Improved” team this year. Itches and Ohs will always keep you honest, but this is looking like a down year for Steve Moser and company. Yes, Rylee and Lauren are very good players, but losing Laura is like the Vikings losing Justin Jefferson. All of their guys are “fine” to “good” but nobody really stands out. Feels like a season where Steve yells a lot. Let’s Get Reccked is in D3 for some reason. Like, why? This team was 2-7 in D5 last season. I understand that they get Dave Baker this season, and he’s really good at age 57. And yes, Alex Buchlis is going to throw for them, which helps a lot. But I feel like D4 might’ve been the move to really figure stuff out. Maybe they’ll surprise but I’m not sure they have the overall talent to win this thing. And then Vaspian is in D3 as well. This team has always been up and down in D4, never really winning it despite some nice regular seasons. I’m assuming this is because of the readdition of Drew Colosimo, but there’s still going to be some growing pains moving up a division. 


Preseason Prediction: The Wanderers walk out of D3 with yet another championship to hang on their mantle, defeating Bullet Club in what should be a fantastic game. 


This Week’s Games:


Bullet Club vs Can’t Touch This (+7) -  These teams played each other pretty close last season, so what an excellent opening game for D3. This game will feature some pretty looking deep shots from Easton and Dougherty, and it may just come down to who blinks first. BULLET CLUB BY 8


Bullet Club vs Wanderers (EVEN) - Well, this is an even better way to start the season. The Wanderers’ first TSL matchup will be against Joe K and one of the TSL’s longest standing “franchises” in BC. Another “Game of the Day” candidate, it’ll be interesting to see how well these two teams fare against each other. The Wanderers make a late game play to seal the victory. WANDERERS BY 3


Wanderers vs Degeneration Sexy (+3) - Things don’t get easier for the Wanderers as they take on the Kellers. A Katie Keller - Mackenzie Klun battle might be very fun to watch, but if the Wanderers can get a turnover early, they may just walk away with another victory. WANDERERS BY 7


Jabronies vs Lets Get Reccked (+10) - I feel like all these guys know each other and are all related somehow. Anyway, its 3pm so Let’s Get Reccked may already be “Reccked” at this point. Assuming they aren’t, I just don’t think they have the horses to really run with Jabronies. JABRONIES BY 8




Championship Odds:


Baadie’s Angels (3-1)

Cunning Stunts (3-1)

Puckett All-Stars (6-1)

Buffalo Vice (8-1)

Travis Henry’s Kids (10-1)

Passing While Intoxicated (15-1)

Creekers (25-1)

Cobblestone (25-1)


Preseason Hype: The standings may just say “BAADies” but I’m calling them what they are. The Angels are BACK. Emily. Maggie. Robin. Val. Nicole. Heather. Sam. The greatest gender team of all time has returned, and they have some new blood with them as well (Talia, Misty, Mackenzie, Steph) as they combine with Garrett to run it back. This team is talented, and while we’ll miss Matty on the field with the girls, Garrett is one hell of a consolation prize. This is going to be FUN. Why is that you ask? Oh, because the Cunning Stunts are STILL HERE. The gender team battle has returned, and whenever they play, they BETTER be on Field 1 so everyone can watch. The Stunts return all of the girls that made them great last season, and they have QB God Joey Batts still slinging the ball for them. D4 is back to when it was at its best: the gender teams rule, and the co-ed teams get mad about it and play better to try to beat them. Puckett was absolutely awesome last season, and they’re already mad that they’re only the 3rd ranked team in the division they dominated a season ago. I don’t think I see any changes to the roster, which is a good thing. They didn’t need to fix what wasn’t broken. They’re the top competitor to the ladies for sure. Buffalo Vice comes rolling in for their 1,053rd season in the TSL. They’re always competitive, and yes, they’re still chasing a title. They’re getting a little older, but that’s okay. They’re still able to play the game at a high level, they’re just more prone to muscle pulls. And they arguably have the greatest girl not on a gender team in Caitlyn Mason, and Rachel Parker is no slouch either. I look forward to Dan emailing me about their epic win over the Stunts soon. THK was a joke last year. Simple as that. John Langley spent way too much time losing games and being miserable. Just kidding. They were at the bottom of the standings, but lost a few close games. And then? They started winning. They ended the season VERY hot, and correct me if I’m misremembering, but I think they just were missing most of their team for the playoff game they lost. The point is, there’s a lot to build on. They have John who could win D4 QB of the year, and they have Pete, who again, is tremendous. And, they added the sneakiest free agent signing of the offseason with getting Aaron Balcerzak from the TOX break up. Their Achilles heel will still be the lack of dominant females behind Mackenzie Klun, but Langley has shown he can overcome that. Topper wanted me to add that Langley is still terrible though. PWI is coming off an impressive D5 victory last season where they took control of a wide open division and ran with it. This team is bringing back the same people but doing the honorable “move up a division”, I don’t think they added anyone to the squad, and they didn’t really need to. This team gelled at the right time and they’re just going to continue to get better every week. The Creekers come into the TSL as a brand new team, as Missy Keem put together a new squad to start playing. Bravo, Missy! However, I don't know too much about them, but again, they can email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. to introduce themselves. And finally, Darryl Carr QB Superstar is in D4 with Cobblestone. Cobblestone played well in D5 and moved up. They honestly just always move around because Darryl just says “put us where you need us”. What an absolutely wonderful man he is. Darryl has a pretty good squad yet again, with AD, Leseaon Washington, and former 716 standout Donte Ridgeway leading the way. As long as they can catch Darryl’s magnificent pinpoint passes this season, they could win the whole thing. 


Preseason Prediction: Puckett All-Stars get it together to beat the Cunning Stunts in the semi-finals, ruining the BAADies-Stunts final we all want. But then Puckett loses to the Angels in the finals anyway. 


This Week’s Games:


Baadie’s Angels vs Buffalo Vice (+3) - Despite my excitement for the return of the Angels, its still been a second since they’ve played together and Garrett hasn’t really thrown for a gender team just yet. Because of that, and them playing at 10am to kick off the season, I think we’ll see a very close game. BAADIES BY 8


Travis Henry’s Kids vs Cobblestone (+6) - Travis Henry’s Kids looks to pick up where they left off last season, and they’re getting the right team to do it against. Cobblestone has talent, for sure, but they’ve struggled to be consistent, dropping the ball (literally) in the games that have mattered. It’ll be interesting to watch this one for sure. TRAVIS HENRY’S KIDS BY 3



Championship Odds:


TMA (5-1)

Tater Tots (6-1)

Not So Sticky (7-1)

Come From Behind (7-1)

Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (9-1)

Goatsack! (10-1)

GUCCI (10-1)

Long Balls (15-1)


Preseason Hype: Welcome to the Thunderdome. D5 looks to be the closest and most competitive division we have top to bottom. There’s no real clear cut “favorite” to win this thing. All that means is that we’re going to see some really good football. TMA comes into the season the same way they always do lately: Preseason favorites. But this isn’t your father’s TMA. The roster is noticeably missing anyone that was over 5’8 on the team. Nick Smith, Prim, Rob Rummings are all gone this season. Diana Bernal was injured in the offseason so she’s missing. On the plus side, TMA had 42 people on the roster to begin with, so they’ll be okay. They still have Ron Webber, Ryan Henry, a couple of Turners, and Val Testa, just to name a few. TMA should have no trouble scoring, but the signature defense they’ve had for years might be a problem this Spring. The Tater Tots show up, and now Derek Pew is launching his signature bombs for them. They also signed Rob Rummings from TMA, which means the Tots get taller, faster, AND a division rival gets worse. Big win for Drunk Meg’s Husband as he resumes his GM duties for the squad. Not So Sticky returns to D5 after waltzing to a D6 title last season. They were 0-9-1 in their last D5 run, so perhaps we need a D5.5 for them to really find their zone. They lost a few key players from the title team, but still should compete for the D5 title this year. Come From Behind is back and they’re largely the same group we’ve come to know and love for the last 40 years. No significant roster changes that I can see, just the same TSL Hall of Famers that will continue to score points and be a title contender every season, as long as everyone shows up. The Interdimensional Lightning Falcons have returned with largely the same squad as last season where they didn’t really live up to expectations. I’m not exactly sure who’s going to be throwing for this team (will it be Andrew?), but they still look to be a QB away from really competing. They have a lot of talent, they just struggle to capitalize on it overall. It hurts that Joe Miano left them to play for the Jabronies, but at least they moved down a division from D4 to recalibrate and get reset. Goatsack is another LONG time team that has been around seemingly forever. I can’t recall if they’ve played in the TSL before or not, because I’m pretty sure they’ve flirted with the idea before, but I don’t remember if it ever happened or not. Either way, QB Andy has brought the sack to D5 and they’re going to be fun to watch. The roster is full of names I’ve heard before in football circles, so teams should beware of what they can do. GUCCI has returned to the TSL and all is right with the world. QB Kelly Kane leads her squad back to the TSL for some fun times and great football. Yet another long time franchise in the Social Co-Ed Touch Football world, Gucci has been around for ages, and they can hold their own with anyone. The Long Balls are a new-ish team that has a lot of the old “Varsity Has Beens” from a year ago, along with Alex Lee of PWI fame. If I recall, a lot of these names are hockey players that are giving football a try. If everything clicks for them, don't be surprised to see them still playing on Championship Saturday. 


Preseason Prediction: Chaos. Glorious Chaos. But when it’s all said and done I think we’ll be seeing the Tater Tots taking home the title over Come From Behind. I can’t wait to see what happens in D5 this season. 


This Week’s Games:


Come From Behind vs Goatsack! (+7) - Two forever franchises battle it out to kick off the D5 season! This game will be close, but with Goatsack having to adjust to the different rules in the TSL that CFB mastered back in 1987, CFB will have the advantage. COME FROM BEHIND BY 10


TMA vs GUCCI (+7) - Gucci returns to get to play TMA right away. Normally that’d be a hard start, but with TMA not exactly very “TMA-y”, and learning how to play without some of their top players, anything can happen. The Captain Val Testa era gets off to a rough start. GUCCI BY 4


Tater Tots vs Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (+10) - The Tots routinely take the Fall off, but they never seem to miss a beat in the Spring when they return. They have a QB, they have their usual roster, and they’ll be just fine. Meanwhile I think ILF is still going to have to adjust to all of their own changes. TATER TOTS BY 9


Not So Sticky vs Long Balls (+7) - A typical case of Old team that’s played together a long time vs the new team that shows some promise but still needs to figure things out. NSS takes advantage. NOT SO STICKY BY 12




Championship Odds:


Blitzkrieg (5-1)

Southside (6-1)

Balls Deep (7-1)

Sausage McMuffins (9-1)

Two Tuddies (10-1)

Grass Eaters (11-1)

Back That Pass up (11-1)

Pit Harade (15-1)

Mighty Drunks (17-1)


Preseason Hype: Okay, maybe I lied. D6 might be the most interesting and close knit division. We have a weaker Blitzkrieg, a little different Southside, and then 7 other teams that are either completely new or a combination of old teams with new old parts. It’s really something. At first glance, I have no idea how any of these teams are going to do and it really seems like the oddsmakers didn’t either. Blitzkrieg is back and they have most of the usual gang back, sans Mackenzie Neary or Kevin Carr, who it could be argued are two of their top players. Southside looks to have a lot of new faces, but they still have Alyssa at the helm and Tyler Cienmy as well. They’re usually pretty good with finding good players, I assume that’ll continue. Balls Deep was better known as Punt Cakes last season, and they weren’t too bad, regardless of finishing last in the division. They added some Spinelli’s talent in Ryan Rusin and Payton himself so the roster is getting an upgrade for sure. Sausage McMuffins give me all of the Passless Chaps vibes, seeing MaKensey Pietz and Eric Pochylski on the roster. They also have absolute superstar Trish Esposito on the roster, which can only mean they’ll be dangerous at the bar as well. The Tuddies are back after a nice run last season where they really started to figure things out. The roster looks to be mostly the same, with a couple of different names that seem new. Another season of playing together will certainly have them in the hunt at season’s end. And they’re just awesome overall. The Grass Eaters are the remnants of the Superior Moser Squad from last season. Steve is throwing this time, and Rylee is back to being receiver, but they’re bringing in a few new players as well. Back That Pass Up has Alex Dutkiewicz of PWI teaming up with Jeff May to bring a whole new team to the league. Pit Harade seems to be the love child of Joe K and Dave Walter. They also have Spinelli’s QB Nick Hawes throwing for him which means if any of the other guys or girls on this team can play, or more accurately run go routes, they’ll score a bunch. I do not foresee Joe K or Dave doing those. Finally, the Mighty Drunks come into play, and they could be awesome or they could be terrible. Nobody knows! Jill Dibble is the only name I recognize on this list, so hopefully she found a bunch of talented friends. 


Preseason Prediction: My best prediction is that I have no idea what’s going to happen, but I’ll take Blitzkrieg to win over Balls Deep in the finals. 


This Week’s Games: 


Southside vs Back That Pass Up (+3) - The only reason Southside is favored is because they’ve played as a team before, I think. BTPU will go as far as Jeff May takes them. When he’s on, he’s more than capable of leading a team to a D6 title. When he’s off, Topper used to consider making a D8 just for Jeff. I think he’s going to come out swinging to prove he’s still got it. BACK THAT PASS UP BY 8


Grass Eaters vs Mighty Drunks (+3) - The over/under on how many times I type “Mighty Ducks” this season is at 4.5. Again, I have zero clue with what we have with the Drunks. But I do know that Steve is an excellent QB and regardless of who he has on his team, he’ll be able to carve up the defense of a new team that’s just figuring it out. GRASS EATERS BY 14


Two Tuddies vs Southside (EVEN) - With how the Tuddies closed the season six months ago, there’s a lot to be excited about. My hope is that they can keep it going after a long layoff, and i don’t know what it is, but i just feel like they will. TWO TUDDIES BY 2


Balls Deep vs Sausage McMuffins (EVEN) -  Oh, another pick’em. But again, this division remains a mystery. When you’re in these situations you have to really go with the best player on the field, and that, by far, is Ryan Rusin. BALLS DEEP BY 8




  1. How badly will it rain? I checked the Buffalo weather and it looks like the field will be less than ideal for an Opening Day. 60 degrees, wind, and rain. Your captains should’ve gotten an email stating what the league plans to do in the rain, but right now expect to play. If it gets too bad, the league may have to cancel some games. Pay attention to the Facebook and the Telegram chat in order to get the most up to date information. 
  2. Did you sign a waiver? Seriously. The TSL has made it pretty clear that if you don’t have a waiver signed before Saturday, you won’t play. Take 10 seconds of your time right now and go here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1NqaQgYi1a2Sr-vlV_Nab-G7gIJhM3fE0O_xWzK0s5P0/edit and sign your waiver. Not sure if you did it? Do it again.
  3. What teams have the best chance to surprise in each division? Always a fun question. Scared Hitless, Freeballers, Can’t Touch This, Travis Henry’s Kids, Goatsack!, and literally anyone in D6. 
  4. Which predictions do you feel most to least confident about? In order from most to least: Wanderers - BAADies - Tater Tots - Losing Streak - Practice Squad - Blitzkrieg. 
  5. Will B’s Brother be present at the fields? As far as I know, B’s Brother is indeed scheduled to appear. I don’t know if the rain will play a factor in his availability however. 




  • I truly think it's awesome that some of the best co-ed teams that haven’t really played in the TSL before are joining up. Teams like Gucci, Goatsack!, and of course the Wanderers coming in to play here rocks. It would’ve been awful if they never came over. (I know Gucci was here for a season, but just let me have it)


  • Same goes for having Losing Streak back in the TSL. It puts a top team right into the D1 race for the championship. 


  • So what are the best games to watch this week? 
  • 10:00  - No Punt Intended vs Untouchaballs
  • 11:00 - Bullet Club vs Wanderers
  • 12:00 - Losing Streak vs Tight Ends In Motion
  • 1:00 - Long Balls vs Not So Sticky
  • 2:00 - Southside vs Two Tuddies
  • 3:00 - Frodo Swaggins vs Grey Hair Don’t Care




  • Let’s pour one out for the franchises that didn’t make it back to us this season, in no particular order: Buffalo Vice Retro, Passed Our Prime, The Replacements, 716, Mountain Dew Me, Get Schwifty, Zack Attack(a D4 champion!), Spinelli’s Plumbing (which is nonsense because their players are on like 7 different teams), TOX, Today’s Feast, Woodpeckers, and Lenny’s Ladies. Some of them won’t be back, some of them will be back in a season. Either way, you’re missed. 


  • Except for Hogan. It’ll be a nice and easy season without that guy screaming and spitting. 


  • Hey guess what? If you want to play on two teams in the fall, you need to get your 4 games of reffing in! (or start a gender team, or bring in a brand new team) That’s an every season thing, not a “I did it that one time” thing. Don’t say “I didn’t know”. 


  • Shout out to a few of the TSLers that I’ve been hearing have either gotten engaged, gotten married, gotten pregnant, or already had a baby in the last half a year! It’s always awesome to see our league’s members doing awesome. 


  • Hey, what happened to "The Manager"?  Turns out writing massive weekly articles isn't for everyone.


  • Special Hellos to Dorene Major, Dave Walter, Molly McDermid, Leslie Cook, Jeff May, Taylor Pagano, Margo Pagano, Maggie LaMantia, Scott Keller Jr, Jen Stachura, Paul LoVullo, Brent McKenzie, Nick Buczek, and of course Tammy Buczek. The great ones deserve recognition, and I only named a few. 


  • There are whispers that the bar may actually be offering the league some bar specials. Not sure exactly what they are yet, but someone let me know when they see them!


And that’s it. The race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality has officially begun! Everyone be safe, have fun, don’t scream at the refs, and enjoy the greatest family gathering you could ever hope to be at. But again, make sure to tell me about it. 


Playoffs Predictions and Stuff

Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 14 October 2022 11:46
Published: Friday, 14 October 2022 11:46
Written by Patrick McGovern
Hits: 183


Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, on Saturday, October 15th in the Year of Our Lord 2022, the Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality will finally begin! The regular season of the TSL Fall 2022 session was just a preview for the games that really matter. 46 of the TSL’s 50 teams are still alive for the chance at Co-Ed Football Glory. It was a long, interesting road to get to this point, as we had a lot of surprises (The Untouchaballs went 3-6? Frodo Swaggins beat Tight Ends?) along the way.


But, the slate is wiped clean. While poor offenses and defenses will more than likely stay that way, it’s the teams that hover in the middle that really make Playoff Saturday one of the best days of the sports calendar year. It’s been compared to March Madness opening weekend many times, and for good reason. The only thing we actually know about the TSL Playoffs is that there will be exciting games, and unexpected upsets that will cause MANY “WE PROVED YOU WRONG!” emails in my inbox around 4pm Saturday once the alcohol starts flowing. I look forward to them every season.


And once you add into the fact that the Fall session tends to give the playoffs some extra “weather” induced fun, you begin to realize that nobody is safe this weekend, unless you had a bye week. According to the local Iowa weather stations, Buffalo is looking at a 60 degree day on Saturday (nice!), but with winds from 20-25 miles per hour (not nice!). It shouldn’t be raining though (nice!), but it appears it’s going to rain in the days leading up to Saturday (not nice, maybe). The point is, bring your cleats, shorts, winter gear, a raincoat, sunscreen, an umbrella and/or TSL approved sideline tent, and just be prepared for anything. It’s why you play the games.


Speaking of the games, while 46 teams are still alive, only 40 of these teams will be playing this weekend. We have a mostly “Terrific Twenty” games for you to enjoy, but before we really dig into the teams that are playing this week, let’s take a moment to remember those that we’ve lost much too soon.





TOX (1-8, 10th in D4) PF: 17.33 (10th), PA: 39.89 (10th), TSL Ranking: 48th, Future Projection: D5


I don’t love having to write about TOX every single season in this space, but the team themselves are a little hamstrung. They SHOULD be playing in D5, but then it would create conflicts with a decent chunk of their team and they just end up stuck. They have a collection of some of the best people in the TSL: Dave Walter, Leslie Cook, and perennial “How does Topper overthrow that guy?” award winner Aaron Balcerzak are just a few of the great players on this roster. Unfortunately, they just couldn’t put it all together. I hope this team comes back in some shape or form, and we get them to a spot where they can start winning some games. Imagine the party at the bar after a TOX championship. Stomach pumps for everyone! We’ll get there someday, it’s just not today.



Cobblestone (2-7 in D4) PF: 25.67 (8th), PA: 34.67 (7th), TSL Ranking: 46th, Future Projection: D4


To make matters even worse for the playoffs, Darryl Carr, QB Superstar is also on the outside looking in. After a season in which Cobblestone had some really good luck with players showing up and performing, this season was the opposite, as roster struggles really did Darryl in. When the team is all at the field, they’re a force to be reckoned with, but the inconsistency really showed, and despite winning last week to put the pressure on other teams to win to get in, they didn’t get the help they needed. We’ll see Darryl in the Spring, and he’ll be better than ever. I know it.



And that wraps it up for the In Memoriam section. Yes, only two teams were lost in the Race to the Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality, which is the benefit of having more evenly divided divisions. But enough about who we’ve lost, let’s talk about who’s here. Remember, in the coming predictions, the “Points For” and “Points Against” rankings are from their division, not the whole league, while the “TSL Ranking’, which is formulated by Topper’s Super Secret Standings program is the overall ranking in the league.



Enough talk, let’s get to it.





Odds To Win The Championship:


Tight Ends In Motion (3-1)

Legends (3-1)

Eyes Downtown (5-1)

Sticky Bandits (6-1)

Scared Hitless (20-1)

Grey Hair Don’t Care (20-1)

Passed Our Prime (50-1)


Teams On Bye: #1 Legends (8-1)


The Story: The Legends and Tight Ends In Motion stand out as the cream of the crop in the division, more than likely on a collision course for the D1 title. Eyes Downtown and Sticky aren’t too far behind, and both are capable of pulling off the upset if one of the top seeds get caught looking ahead to the championship game. While it was nice to get to 7 teams in D1 this season, we were basically at 4 again as the new editions of Scared Hitless, Grey Hair Don’t Care, and Passed Our Prime really took their lumps and growing pains this year.



#2 Tight Ends In Motion (7-2) vs #7 Scared Hitless (2-6-1)


Points For: TEIM 38.11 (1st), SH 30.78 (5th)

Points Against: TEIM 20.56 (1st), SH 37.78 (6th)

TSL Ranking: TEIM 7th, SH 43rd

Past Games: TEIM 44 - SH 14

Line: Tight Ends In Motion (-20)



Tight Ends In Motion started out 7-0 and they were the toast of the town, but they absolutely crumbled down the stretch. Losing to the Legends is one thing, but getting beaten by Frodo in a D1/D2 Crossover game is another. Perhaps they just can’t beat Sean? Despite the last two weeks, TEIM still boasts the best overall offense and defense in D1, that’s gotta mean something. QB Bro has been very good all year, consistently in the “Top QB” conversation. When you have weapons like Derek Bongiovanni, Kyle Conniff, and Katie Salisbury, that makes things a lot easier too. It wasn’t the dream scenario Scared Hitless drew up. Jonny Football can’t be happy with a 2-6-1 record, but this team still trots out stud girls in Melanie Linsmair, Jaimie Warren, Carly DeWeese (perennially underrated as she’s stuck in the shadows of the other two), and you even get a Cat Peters sighting now and again. Dylan Day has the weapons, it’s just on him to figure out how. He’s done so in D3 and D2, so D1 is next. It’s just not this year. This is why you avoid adding Mike Rawdin to your team. TIGHT ENDS IN MOTION BY 17


#3 Sticky Bandits (5-3-1) vs #6 Grey Hair Don’t Care (2-5-2)


Points For: SB 34.22 (4th), GHDC 28.89 (6th)

Points Against: SB 27.89 (3rd), GHDC 37.44 (5th)

TSL Ranking: SB 15th, GHDC 41st

Past Games: SB 48 - GHDC 32, SB 31 - GHDC 31

Line: Sticky Bandits (-8)


The Sticky Bandits proceed to make the title game last year, and everyone just forgets about them. Perhaps, for this season anyway, rightfully so. A slow start led them to a weird 5-3-1 record, but when you consider the losses were to the other top teams in the division, you realize maybe they’re a lot closer than you realize. QB Mike Thomas has proven by now that he’s one of the top QBs in the league, and with weapons like Adrian Cannon and the ageless Kevin Zack, the Sticky offense can make things happen. Let’s not forget they trot out Laura Streeter as well, and they have “much better than you think they are” girls in Christine Krol and Nicole Sharick. Grey Hair made the jump up to D1 and while 2-5-2 looks bad, it really means they were two plays away from being 4-5 which would’ve been huge (and we’ll ignore that they were two plays away from 2-7 completely). Dave Eickhoff has got his offense down, and they’ve made some adjustments as the season went on. When you have a team that can trot out Nick and Kayla Voss, George Lombardo, and “probably should be in the conversation for best female in the league, why aren’t you paying attention Rankings Committee?” Amber Hay, you’re going to be pretty good. This was a great season to build on, and they’re going to give Sticky a game for sure. STICKY BANDITS BY 3


#4 Eyes Downtown (5-4) vs #5 Passed Our Prime (3-6)


Points For: ED 36.67 (3rd), POP 25.75 (7th)

Points Against: ED 24.67 (2nd), POP 38.38 (7th)

TSL Ranking: ED 17th, POP 40th

Past Games: ED 52 - POP 17

Line: Eyes Downtown (-14)


Eyes Downtown had themselves a year this time around, reminding everyone in the league that they’re not dead yet. Bobby McConnell (when he’s not skipping games to play flag football) continues to be a top QB after all these years, and the play of Eric Delecki and Ben Stack among the others have been why you see ED competing again. Rachel Grampp and Emily Belfield are great talents as well, but the return of Margo (no last name needed, you just know) can always swing a game, whether she’s scoring touchdowns or stabbing someone. POP is somehow 3-6 and somehow a 5th seed when they trot out the worst offense and defense in the division. I have no idea how Hogan does it. Brandy Clarke, Amy Taylor, and Elena Schratz form a pretty damn good core of females nobody in the league is talking about. And when Ralph Finney, Keyon Elias, AD, and Bryan Munro are all actually at the fields at once? This team is pretty damn good. The problem of course, is getting them all there. They have all the talent in the world at wide receiver. We just need to get them a quarterback. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 10





Odds To Win The Championship:


Frodo Swaggins (3-1)

No Punt Intended (4-1)

The Untouchaballs (6-1)

DILFs (10-1)

Freeballers (12-1)

Buffalo Vice Retro (40-1)

The Replacements (Infinity-1)


Teams On Bye:  #1 Frodo Swaggins (8-1)


The Story:  D2 becomes “D1 lite” as most of the top teams should be up a division. Frodo Swaggins had a banner year, ending with an upset over TEIM in the crossover gamel. No Punt Intended is right behind them though, as they look to battle Frodo with a full squad for once. The Untouchaballs had a rough season with forfeits and close losses, but they’re a lot better than people are remembering. Same for the DILFs, who haven’t even had Dubey for most of the year. The Freeballers have an outside shot at making some noise. Buffalo Vice Retro can sneak up on you if you take them lightly. The Replacements can not.



#2 No Punt Intended (7-2) vs #7 The Replacements (0-9)


Points For: NPI 37.13 (1st), TR 10.75 (7th)

Points Against: NPI 29.00 (3rd), TR 48.00 (7th)

TSL Ranking: NPI 10th, TR 50th

Past Games: NPI 44 - TR 22

Line: No Punt Intended (-30)



Minus 30 is probably not enough, and if NPI didn’t have just about everyone on the team who had another game, they’d be able to hit it. No Punt Intended burst onto the scene at the last second, and they’re not the NPI you remember from D4. QB Kyle has a lot more wrinkles than he once did, but with that age comes wisdom, and he’s been excellent at QB. Of course, having Amber and Jaimie as your top females could even make Topper look good. But that’s where Kyle has some new entries in the league that have taken off. Shbend Betsa has been a hell of a find, and 8 foot 4 inch monster (so i’ve been told) Carlton Coatsworth is a force to be reckoned with, and even if he isn’t, he’s just bigger than you so it doesn’t matter. NPI is kicking ass with some new TSL names, which makes it even better. The Replacements registered as a football team for some reason. NO PUNT INTENDED BY 50


I’m kidding, sort of. The Replacements are led by Shawn Adamski who did the right thing and started up a new team. Sadly, he just chose the wrong division to start in. They’re not the first team to start way too high and get killed. Hell, they’re not even the first “The Replacements” in the league. I can’t really give too many props for this season, but I hope they come back in a much ‘safer’ division so they can have some fun. (D5, guys, start there) NO PUNT INTENDED BY 20.



#3 Freeballers (4-5) vs #6 Buffalo Vice Retro (3-6)


Points For: FB 31.50 (5th), BVR 19.11 (6th)

Points Against: FB 30.25 (4th), BVR 31.22 (5th)

TSL Ranking: FB 24th, BVR 35th

Past Games: BVR 20 - FB 13

Line: Freeballers (-6)



Let’s start with the obvious: D2 is a mess. The Freeballers are the 3rd seed at 4-5. Basically, anyone from the 3-6 seeds can beat each other on any given Saturday. Look no further than two weeks ago when BVR beat the Freeballers 20 - 13. That was a big win for BVR to get them “on track” but it also made the Freeballers know not to take them for granted. The Freeballers have had great seasons from Dylan Jaloza, Jared Inthavong, and league sweetheart/viper Talia Calabro. The talent is there to compete, but I don’t think, even with Dave Baker to help settle things down and give his 1,585,295 games worth of wisdom, that they’re on the level for a title. BVR trots out Seth at QB to go along with Caitlyn Mason and Rachel Parker, but after that, there isn’t a stand out male player that can win them a game single handedly. But, that’s the point. The males are deep (phrasing) across the board, and that makes it hard for teams to know who’s going to beat them. The Freeballers usually play better with a chip on their shoulder, so I’ll tell them they suck now, and because of that: FREEBALLERS BY 10. You’re welcome.


#4 DILFs (4-5) vs #5 The Untouchaballs (3-6)


Points For: DILFs 35.11 (3rd), UT 34.71 (4th)

Points Against: DILFs 35.33 (6th), UT 27.00 (2nd)

TSL Ranking: DILFs 29th, UT 32nd

Past Games: DILFs 48 - UT 46

Line: EVEN


If this game isn’t the best game on the schedule this weekend, it has to be in everyone’s Top 3. These two teams played a crazy game earlier in the season that saw the DILFs win on a Hail Mary with no time left. These two teams have talent all over the place, and you can’t let the records fool you. DILFs have future TSL Hall of Famer Brandt Dubey at QB, unless he doesn’t show up. Then they have Travis Cleavanger-Bernal running around back there instead. They have 742 years of experience with Eric Stegmeier and Rogo out there. They have the 3Ks of Katie, Kelly, and Kellie making plays all over the field. They’re the definition of a “veteran” team who knows how to beat you. The Untouchaballs, have Jeremy F’N Burr. He doesn’t do it alone though. Everyone knows about Mel Linsmair, but they forget about Joelle and Meg. Matt Helm has gotten some pub in the past, but people don’t know about Ryan Dombrowski. Add in Jamie McCabe and Handsome Greg and you’ve got yourselves a stud team. This game is going to rock, mild upset alert. THE UNTOUCHABALLS BY 7




Odds To Win The Championship


Mountain Dew Me (5-1)

Bullet Club (5-1)

716 (7.16-1)

Scott Senior’s Starting (8-1)

Can’t Touch This (10-1)

Get Schwifty (12-1)

Itches and Ohs (14-1)

Practice Squad (17-1)


Teams On Bye: No Bye Weeks are awarded in D3


The Story: The TSL’s most wide open division, as you wouldn’t be surprised if any of these teams walked away with the championship. Mountain Dew Me and Bullet Club come in as “co-favorites” based on their equal record and the fact that they played a game that came down to the wire. 716 is a step behind, as they’ve lost close games to both MDM and BC, but they always have seemed to be missing key personnel. SSS can compete with any of the above teams, but they’re in the middle of the usual slow finish after a hot start. The backend of the division is very “wild west-y” as all four teams have beaten up on each other but also can steal a win from the “top” half. Anyone can win this division.



#1 Mountain Dew Me (7-2) vs #8 Practice Squad (2-6-1)


Points For: MDM 29.11 (4th), PS 28.89 (5th)

Points Against: MDM 24.33 (3rd), PS 33.56 (7th)

TSL Ranking: MDM 6th, PS 42nd

Past Games: PS 28 - MDM 18, MDM 33 - PS 32

Line: MDM (-6)



A rivalry renewed yet again. Practice Squad has had their worst season in a long time, most of that is simply due to not knowing how to play against D3 teams, and learning about it. But that isn’t the case with MDM. These longtime rivals meet up yet again in a playoff game that will only further things for them. Practice Squad’s biggest loss since B became the full time QB was a D5 Overtime Championship loss to MDM. He’s thought about that for a few seasons now, and it drives him every time these teams meet. You don’t think getting a chance to be an 8 seed upsetting a 1 seed isn’t going to have him hyper focused? PS still has tons of talent with Renee Lantz and Kelly Liddle alongside Jamie McCabe, Ashtin Fiegel, three different Kyles, and Kenny Lantz too. This team can do some damage, and they have the speed to keep up with the speedy MDM players. The 3,402 McGregors combine with a couple of Mertzes to put together a solid, smart, and very, very fast squad that are tough to beat. But Practice Squad has done it before. It’s upset time. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 1.


#2 Bullet Club (7-2) vs #7 Get Schwifty (3-6)


Points For: BC 31.38 (3rd), GS 23.38 (8th)

Points Against: BC 23.13 (1st), GS 23.63 (2nd)

TSL Ranking: BC 9th, GS 37th

Past Games: BC 30 - GS 21, BC 21 - GS 0 (forfeit)

Line: Bullet Club (-7)


Bullet Club moved down to D3 and had a team revival of sorts, leading D3 for most of the year and only finishing 2nd based off a 1 point loss to Mountain Dew Me during the year. QB Jeff Easton looks like he did many years ago, and his weapons have been arguably better than ever. Non-Award Winning Tommy Hughes provides a spark to this offense, as did long time Frodo player Nick Buczek. John Langley looks good as a wide receiver, Anthony Deak didn’t get hurt somehow, and the answer to the “Would Pete Wallbrandt be any good outside of D6?” question is a resounding yes. They boast above average girls across the board, and they’re going to be a tough out for anyone in these playoffs. Get Schwifty has been a bit all over the place this season, as Blase LaDuca got some of his family members together to start a new franchise. QB Larry has a super strong arm, and they have some height on the team too. Long time TSL veteran Dorene Major leads a solid group of females into battle here. These two teams are the top ranked defenses in the league, but at the end of the day BC should outscore Schwifty. BULLET CLUB BY 6


#3 716 (5-4) vs #6 Itches and Ohs (3-5-1)


Points For: 716 32.00 (2nd), Ohs 24.00 (7th)

Points Against: 716 28.89 (4th), Ohs 29.89 (5th)

TSL Rankings: 716 18th, Ohs 31st

Past Games: 716 35 - Ohs 9, 716 42 - Ohs 19

Line: 716 (-10)


Sometimes teams just have the other’s number, and that’s what we’ve got here. 716 has blown Itches out of the water twice now, mostly on the arm strength of Derek Pew. But when he’s got Nick Voss and Donte Ridgeway making some plays for him, it's easy to look good. Add in Eric Pochylski and James Celotto, and you have yourself a very good squad. 716 lacks a bit of talent on the female end of things though, and this has proven to be their downfall time and time again. It’s not that they’re bad at all, don’t get me wrong, they’re just usually at a disadvantage from the team across from them. Case in point, the deadly trio of Laura Streeter, Rylee Moser, and Lauren Moser on Itches and Ohs. It just hasn’t been the best of times for Itches this season, but it's impossible to fully count them out. They’re still one of the smartest teams on the field, it's just been an execution problem. I think a lack of overall team speed does them in, since 716 has the ability to turn this game into a track meet. 716 by 12


#4 Scott Seniors Starting (4-5) vs #5 Can’t Touch This (4-5)


Points For: SSS 35.33 (1st), CTT 28.00 (6th)

Points Against: SSS 33.33 (6th), CTT 34.44 (8th)

TSL Ranking: SSS 25th, CTT 27th

Past Games: SSS 42 - CTT 35, CTT 46 - SSS 44

Line: SSS (-6)



These two teams met last weekend, and Can’t Touch This turned in their best performance of the year, taking the victory by 2 points, and avenging a Week 1 loss to SSS. SSS hasn’t looked good for the second part of the year, despite trotting out 5 Kellers (6 if we count Stegs now) on the roster. Scotty Dro has been hit and miss all season as well, which only adds to the issues. Damien Keller gets a special shout out for his play this season, all reports suggest he has a bright TSL future ahead of him. By now, you know what the deal is with CTT. Ryan Dougherty has the strong arm, they have solid girls who can win them the game (as proven last season), and the supporting cast of gentlemen (led by Anthony Battaglia and Cool Beard Guy) aren’t slouches either. CTT feels ready to make some noise yet again, and SSS feels a bit off. CAN'T TOUCH THIS BY 3





Odds to Win The Championship:


Cunning Stunts (3-1)

Puckett All-Stars (4-1)

Zack Attack (6-1)

Buffalo Vice (9-1)

Spinelli’s Plumbing (10-1)

Travis Henry’s Kids (12-1)

Vaspian (15-1)

Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (20-1)


Teams On Bye: None


The Story: The Stunts ran roughshod over the division all season, but so did Puckett. Zack Attack found some much needed offense this season, as did Buffalo Vice. Spinelli’s can still score, but they struggle to stop anyone. Vaspian has just been “okay” all season, but their defense is still top notch. ILF hasn’t been really good since Joe Miano got hurt. And Travis Henry’s Kids upset the Stunts to make the playoffs, which has to bode well for them.


#1 Cunning Stunts (8-1) vs #8 Travis Henry’s Kids (3-6)


Points For: CS 50.13 (1st), THK 28.44 (6th)

Points Against: CS 37.00 (9th), THK 32.44 (6th)

TSL Ranking: CS 1st, THK 38th

Past Games: THK 56 - CS 40

Line: CS (-8)


THK isn’t a normal 8 seed for the ladies this week. They were two one point losses away from a 5-4 record that would’ve put them into 3rd place instead (they would’ve had the tie breaker with Zack Attack). John Langley played a psuedo-playoff game last week, and he delivered. Is this a changing of fortunes? Perhaps. John also throws to Pete Wallbrandt and Anthony Deak, which really helps things too. Alex Corbelli allegedly, isn’t anything to shake a stick at either. Where things get tough for THK is on the female side of the ball, as Katie Garey and whichever other girls show up are decent, but to ask them to match up against the Stunts just isn’t fair. Joey Batts has his ladies team demolishing D4, and a promotion to D3 whether they like it or not is coming their way. You know the names here: Taylor Pagano, Kelly Liddle, Renee Lantz, Jill Battaglia, Jen Mertz, Brandy Clarke, etc. They’ve done this forever, and the Stunts are a who’s who for women in the league. The other thing they’ve done forever? Finish first and blow it in the playoffs. THK will give them a game, but the loss last week has them more focused than ever. CUNNING STUNTS BY 8


#2 Puckett All-Stars (8-1) vs #7 Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (4-5)


Points For: PAS 42.89 (2nd), ILF 26.67 (7th)

Points Against: PAS 29.56 (3rd), ILF 31.67 (5th)

TSL Ranking: PAS 3rd, ILF 30th

Past Games: PAS 50 - ILF 35

Line: Puckett All-Stars (-9)


Puckett All-Stars are F’n Amazing. They are the best team in the TSL that nobody is talking about. After a close, Week 1 loss to the Stunts, Puckett has had their sights set on revenge against the Stunts, and right now they’d theoretically get it in the title game. How perfect. These aren’t quite your same old All-Stars I hear. Vince Taverna, the stud QB from Quinn, has taken over, and as a result Puckett has been beyond good. In fact *checks roster*Mike Gelz, Lauren Gelz, Joe Schwab. . . this is basically All We Do Is Quinn. Okay, it isn’t that serious, and a lot of the players on PAS have been there for a millenia (Hey Ashley!). Elisha Reimers has been good at football for years and the league still hasn’t taken notice. And I’m sure there are even some more additions that are killing it for them. Meanwhile, ILF is cooked, maybe. A QB injury derails a season like nothing else. Andrew Kicak does his best to keep it together, and even in the face of adversity you’re getting quality play out Jason Neth, Brett Feind, Alex Baker, and Karl Smith. Christina Nelson is a very good player, and you’re seeing some growth out of Becca Dominesey as well. This is a bad team by any stretch, it’s just not their year. PUCKETT ALL-STARS BY 13


#3 Zack Attack (6-3) vs #6 Vaspian (4-5)


Points For: ZA 33.67 (5th), Vaspian 21.00 (9th)

Points Against: ZA 22.33 (1st), Vaspian 25.13 (2nd)

TSL Ranking: ZA 12th, Vaspian 26th

Past Games: ZA 51 - Vaspian 22

Line: Zack Attack (-10)


D4’s top two defenses meet each other in this first round matchup. Zack Attack has spent years having a great defense but scoring points was always a challenge. Not anymore. Zack Attack added Sam and Anthony “Sam’s Husband” Lattuca to the mix, alongside Glenn Bird, ZA has looked really good. Zack Elphick has made strides as a QB, and his brother Jay continues to be a fantastic player. Add in a bunch of solid, but terrible dart playing females in Jenna and Kayla and you have yourself a team that could make some noise in the playoffs. Vaspian hasn’t had a great season on offense. Defense is still the name of the game here, but with too many missed games at QB, the offense hasn’t really settled in. Add into the fact that they’ve replaced essentially every girl from the “normal” Vaspian team and it's going to take some time to gel.


#4 Buffalo Vice (4-4-1) vs #5 Spinelli’s Plumbing (4-4-1)


Points For: Vice 35.89 (4th), SP 39.33 (3rd)

Points Against: Vice 31.11 (4th), SP 36.22 (8th)

TSL Ranking: Vice 20th, SP 21st

Past Games: Vice 54 - SP 54 (Tie)

Line: EVEN


In Week 1 of the season, these two teams played to a 54-54 tie. Since then, both teams have gone 4-4 and quite frankly not much separates these two teams. Vice scores slightly less, but they allow slightly less. Dan Gonzalez’s team has benefitted from Andy Clark playing Prodigal son and coming home. Adding that arm allows Frank Pizza to do his thing at WR when he can, and we all should know about Caitlyn Mason by now. Amy Denning has been good for a long time as well. This team can play. Spinelli’s got really, really hot the last few seasons, and they’re continuing that streak. But they have to learn how to stop someone and get away from the “Best defense is a good offense” mentality. Nick Hawes is probably the TSL’s yardage leader for the last three years, as he gets to throw to Ryan Rusin, Zack Estes, and yes, even Payton Spinelli. Katie Swanson is a name we’ve known for a decade, but don’t forget about what Kaely Kwitek, Chelsea Lepore, and Audrey Enzian can do out there. These ladies are all criminally underrated despite being a part of one of the TSL’s best offenses for a while. This one should be a shootout. Again. BUFFALO VICE BY 1




Odds To Win The Championship:


TMA (2-1)

Come From Behind (4-1)

Passing While Intoxicated (7-1)

Woodpeckers (10-1)

Today’s Feast (15-1)

Let’s Get Reccked (20-1)


Teams On Bye: #1 TMA, #2 Come From Behind


The Story: TMA dominated the entire regular season before a surprising hiccup at the end of the year to go 7-2. Come From Behind played incredibly well, only losing to TMA and PWI. PWI kind of looked lost for the first part of the season, but they’re locked in now, beating TMA and CFB in recent weeks, and giving D5 a legitimate third contender. The Woodpeckers also rebounded from a weak start to go to 4-4-1 on the season, and they’re right in the same spot they were last year before they won the title. Today’s Feast has a lot to be proud about in terms of improvement from years past. Let’s Get Reccked was a brand new squad that needed some to gel (and heal!) together.


#3 Passing While Intoxicated (4-4-1) vs #6 Let’s Get Reccked (2-7)


Points For: PWI 25.89 (3rd), LGR 19.67 (6th)

Points Against: PWI 24.89 (2nd), LGR 29.00 (5th)

TSL Ranking: PWI 22nd, LGR 47th
Past Games: PWI 30 - LGR 19

Line: Passing While Intoxicated (-8)


Passing While Intoxicated has their team on the same page and two straight wins over the teams on bye to show for it. I’m not sure who the QB is for PWI, as I thought it was Colorado Mike, but I believe we’re back to Alex Lee behind center. PWI trots out Ryan Dombrowski, A pair of Szumigalas, and Alex Dutkiewicz to go along with a handful of females who can beat you in different ways. Let’s Get Reccked was Ricky Recckio’s brainchild, and he’s got some pretty cool people on the roster. Jon Dean has been a winner on and off the field, and their QB’s name is Denver Macintosh, which might be the coolest name in the league. He also wears Bills Zubaz I’m told, so just hand him the MVP. Talia Calabro, Kayla Deth, Doreen Major, Becca Dominesey, and Carly Reeb round out a fantastic group of TSL ladies, so it's amazing that LGR didn’t win more. At the very least, they silly stringed Ricky on the field. PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED BY 11


#4 Woodpeckers (4-4-1) vs #5 Today’s Feast (3-6)


Points For: WP 22.22 (5th), TF 24.44 (4th)

Points Against: WP 27.33 (4th), TF 30.89 (6th)

TSL Ranking: WP 23rd, TF 39th

Past Games: TF 51 - WP 22, WP 45 - TF 8

Line: Woodpeckers (-2)


The Woodpeckers started off rough, as they struggled through some roster issues and getting their team to the fields. But once they started showing up? Whew boy it’s been a different team. Joe B’s team has been very competitive and he’s starting to look like the QB that captured D6 last year. Mark B is right there playing some of his best football as well. Ryan Hawkins, Jake Lewis, and William Su have more than made up for the missing Wrestler Dan Farinacci, who has apparently determined he’s too good for the TSL this season. You may not know the names Melissa Houghton, Rachel Szafarczyk, and Nina Komoninski, but you’re about to. These ladies have been fantastic all season, and they’re a big reason the Peckers upset TMA this year. Today’s Feast spent most of their careers being feasted upon. The move to D5 was smart, as they’re starting to figure out their offense a bit more, but right now, that defense is straight up yuck. Chuck Jackson has put together a decent team that will only get better, and they have a person named Simba on the team. Yes, like the Lion King. Look out Denver, we have a new coolest name already. Anyway, I don't know much else about this team, but they can email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. to tell me who’s rocking for this team. But, until then, WOODPECKERS BY 8




Odds To Win The Championship


Not So Sticky (3-1)

Blitzkrieg (3-1)

Superior Moser Squad (7-1)

Lenny’s Ladies (12-1)

Two Tuddies (15-1)

Punt Cakes (18-1)


Teams On Bye: #1 Not So Sticky, #2 Blitzkrieg


The Story: Not So Sticky moved down to D6 and they’ve pretty much dominated the division, winning it pretty easily. They’re more than likely going back up to D5 in the spring, win or lose. Blitzkrieg, same thing. These two teams were far and above the top two and it wasn’t even close. The rest of the teams just beat up on each other. Superior Moser Squad used a female QB the entire season, which was pretty cool, though there’s a nice debate about which one was the better QB (hint: it's Lauren). Lenny’s Ladies had their usual up and down season. Punt Cakes sometimes look like world beaters, and other times they look clueless. And the Tud Buds won two games last weekend to go to 3-6 which is pretty awesome, as they slowly, but consistently, improve.


#3 Superior Moser Squad (5-4) vs #6 Punt Cakes (2-7)


Points For: SMS 30.00 (4th), PC 31.13 (3rd)

Points Against: SMS 28.11 (3rd), PC 31.63 (5th)

TSL Ranking: SMS 19th, PC 45th

Past Games: SMS 33 - PC 25, SMS 60 - PC 22

Line: Superior Moser Squad (-7)


Superior Moser Squad tried something new and unique this season and it had some mixed results. A rotating female QB led to some really exciting games, but also a couple of blowout losses. Now, SMS is obviously led by Rylee Moser, with help from Lauren Moser as well. Steve Moser showed he could be a pretty good WR too if he wanted. The return of Jeremy Streit is going to prove game changing for these guys as well. Punt Cakes hasn’t had the best of years. We’ll ignore some roster trickery, but Baby Gronk put together a pretty fast team, but one that still needs to learn the ins and outs of the game. This is another team that I’d love for someone to email me about so I can learn who the rocker players are, because honestly? I don’t know. And neither does anyone else. Yet. But for now, 60-22 seems excessive, but it seems the direction we’re heading with this one. SUPERIOR MOSER SQUAD BY 13


#4 Two Tuddies (3-6) vs #5 Lenny’s Ladies (3-6)


Points For: TT 23.33 (5th), LL 18.11 (6th)

Points Against: TT 28.78 (4th), LL 35.44 (6th)

TSL Ranking: TT 33rd, LL 34th

Past Games: LL 20 - TT 12, TT 27 - LL 8

Line: TT (-1)


The Two Tuddies finally saw some of the fruits of their labor come to life as they went 2-0 last week. It’s one thing to beat the Ladies here, but it's an entire other thing to beat Blitzkrieg too. It seems that the Tud Buds are finally starting to learn how to play this game, and it’s coming at the right time. Ryan Miller has put together a good group of people, and Tim Arnold, Chris Wollcot, Kory Reid, and Christian Ferger can play and adapt. They’re still figuring out the girl end of things, but getting Sarah Palazza as a #1 is a good start. The rest of the ladies are still, like the team, figuring it out, but consistently improving. As for the Ladies, it was another season of roster turnover as has become custom for them. But once again, they lucked out. Besides Lenny’s Ladies OG Katie Swanson, Maddie Norton is an absolute gem, they get the First Lady of the TSL in Val Bernal, newcomers Hannah Rausch and Coleen Kaminski have been very good for first timers, and Kelsey Harrigan has been quite a find as well. As always, the talent is there, the key for the girls is learning how to play defensive positions they may not be used to. They’re going to be a tough out if everything clicks right. LENNY’S LADIES BY 2



 1. What top seed is most likely to lose early? Well, I picked Mountain Dew Me to lose to Practice Squad early, but I’d still pick them only because they play in the league’s closest division.

 2. Who are your top Dark Horses, overall and in each division? My biggest “Dark Horse” is the Untouchaballs because I think they can play with the teams above them. Other than them, the lower seeded teams to watch out for: D1: Grey Hair Don’t Care, D3: Can’t Touch This, D4: Buffalo Vice, D5: Passing While Intoxicated, D6: Superior Moser Squad

 3. Okay, Predict the champions. Fine. D1: Tight Ends In Motion, D2: No Punt Intended, D3: 716, D4: Puckett All-Stars, D5: TMA, D6: Blitzkrieg

 4. Not a lot of chalk there, how come? I think some of the teams are #1 seeds, so that’s chalk-ish to me. I went with Tight Ends based on how good they’ve been, and I can’t say that two losses by a combined 7 points means it’s all over. NPI can very easily lose to Frodo, but Garrett at QB in a big game has proven worrisome in the past. 716 has the pieces to put it all together in D3. Puckett is looking for revenge in D4, and the Stunts always blow it. The game, for the record. TMA has been too good to not win (D4 regardless in the spring?) D5. And I went with Blitzkrieg just because I love believing in them, and it's their time.

 5. If you could only watch one game on Saturday, which one would it be? That’s a hard question. There are some really good matchups here. I almost went with Buffalo Vice vs Spinelli’s Plumbing, but the answer really is DILFs vs The Untouchaballs. That’s going to be awesome.



 1. It's the playoffs. I know that tensions are going to run high during the Race for Social Co-Ed Immortality, so it's your usual reminder to KEEP YOUR COOL. Don’t freak out on the refs, on your own teammates, on that squirrel running by, or the other team. Keep it together or you WILL be tossed. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

 2. Breakfast Club Predictions:

  1. Amber Alert 42, Jennacide 27
  2. Steph Infection 38, BDSM 35

 3. The best games of the hour:

    1. 10:00 - Sticky Bandits vs Grey Hair Don’t Care
    2. 11:00 - Dilfs vs The Untouchaballs
    3. 12:00 - Mountain Dew Me vs Practice Squad
    4. 1:00 - Buffalo Vice vs Spinelli’s Plumbing
    5. 2:00 - Woodpeckers vs Today’s Feast

 4. Three teams that have the best chance for an upset that I didn’t pick earlier: Vaspian, Get Schwifty, Buffalo Vice Retro

 5. Three teams that are saddled with “Playoff John Langley” at QB this weekend: Travis Henry’s Kids, Bullet Club, Lenny’s Ladies. Talk about mortgaging the future. (My guess: John goes 2-1)

 6. Most shocking upset that probably won’t happen, but it wouldn’t seem THAT implausible: Scared Hitless ending Tight Ends In Motion’s D1 hopes.

 7. Pick your best bets over 10-1 odds: Grey Hair Don’t Care, Freeballers, Practice Squad, Travis Henry’s Kids, Woodpeckers, Punt Cakes. (I can’t actually bet Replacements at Infinity-1 because how does that work?)

 8. Remember to talk to Emily Schilling about your participation in the Halloween Bowl! Its 11:00am on October 29th. There will be specials and everything!

 9. Write down December 9th as the day of the banquet! More details will be coming shortly, I promise you.

 10. I think if everyone asks Topper really nicely tonight and bombards him with messages, we might actually get him to come to the fields. But it only works if EVERYONE takes a second to message him. So get to it. It’ll be worth it.


That’s it! The Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality is on! Good luck!



Championship Saturday Thought, Predictions, Questions & Stuff

Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 21 October 2022 12:24
Published: Friday, 21 October 2022 12:24
Written by Patrick McGovern
Hits: 175


Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, on Saturday, October 21st in the Year of Our Lord 2022, the Race for Social Co-Ed Immortality will be completed for the Fall 2022 session. 7 champions across 7 divisions will be crowned, and if the games are anything like they were last weekend, those titles will be EARNED. 26 of the 50 TSL teams this season remain alive, after a wild Playoff Saturday that saw MANY of the higher seeds in each division fall, including the only two #1 seeds (Mountain Dew Me and Cunning Stunts) that had a game this week. Don’t tell me those bye weeks aren’t important.


As has been the case in recent seasons, I’ve bothered the TSL QB Power Rankings Committee to give me a second set of opinions on these tremendous matchups we have coming for us this Saturday.


GF: Hey there Committee! It's time to make you earn your paychecks yet again. Another ridiculous Playoff Week of upsets and the unexpected happening is in the books, giving us another "anything can happen" Championship Week this Saturday as the Race for Social Co-Ed Immortality nears the finish line. What really stood out to you guys?


TSLQBPRC: Well you've said it already, it's the upsets, right?  Listen, we knew there would be a couple, but Tight Ends in Motion, Mountain Dew Me, Cunning Stunts ALL losing?  Impossible.  Even if we suspected one or two these might be in the making (and yes, we did an EXCELLENT job of predicting these if you look at our Overrated/Underrated analysis last week) we will never in a million years pretend we thought ALL of these would happen on the same day.  Has there EVER been this much chaos in one week?


GF: I feel like there's always chaos, but the exception of last year really helped us forget how crazy things can be on Playoff Saturday. If you remember, last season the higher seeded teams went a nearly unprecedented 16-4, which may actually have been the record for "most top seeds win". The season before? They were 11-9. That time away from the craziness might've had people forget. While I'm sure that the "lovely" weather played a factor in some of these upsets, you have to remember that both teams had to play in the same conditions. Now we roll into Championship Saturday with the following top seeded teams in each division: #1 Legends in D1, #1 Frodo Swaggins in D2, #2 Bullet Club in D3, #2 Puckett All-Stars in D4, #1 TMA in D5, and #1 Not So Sticky in D6. We'll get into predictions in a minute, but if you had to rank these seeds from "Least Likely to Most Likely to be Upset", where would you have them?


TSLQBPRC: Least likely to be upset is... wow, is it Legends?  We don't even think they're that dominant a team (they've beaten their three possible opponents this week by only 8, 8 and 12 this season) but every other division seems even closer somehow.  TMA is the next least likely, where only Come From Behind and even Passing While Intoxicated have a real shot.  Then Puckett (Zack Attack must have a chance right?), then Not So Sticky (will ANY other teams be drinking mid-game this weekend?).  Then the most likely to be upset are probably Bullet Club only because they play in the tightest division (though Mountain Dew Me getting knocked out helps) and finally Frodo Swaggins.  Frodo was incredible this session, but they have a perfect foil in No Punt Intended that no one would be "shocked" if they lost against, so they're the most likely to be upset.  Maybe.  Possibly.  Who knows.  Agree, disagree?


GF: Once the Legends didn't have to deal with Tight Ends In Motion anymore, they ended up with the "easiest" path to winning. After that we're seeing things a little differently. I think Puckett All-Stars have been SO GOOD that they're next in line there in D4. After that, I'd say Frodo Swaggins, which is shocking, given NPI's talent, but Frodo just feels like a pretty damn good D1 team at this point and NPI doesn't. I'll say TMA here next, despite their incredible history of blowing championships they should've won. After that, it's Not So Sticky, who has tremendous competition in Blitzkrieg and the "Yeah, we sacrificed a couple of Baby Goats to get really good at football, really fast" Two Tuddies nipping at their heels. Finally, Bullet Club has to be the "most likely to be upset" leader just because D3 has been a warzone all season, and nothing is guaranteed.


Of all the matchups in the "second round", which are you looking most forward to and why?


TSLQBPRC: We've got a few we'll have our eyes on.  D4 has some of the best matchups of the day so if people are smart they won't leave early!  Dominant Puckett All-Stars vs suddenly resurgent Travis Henry's Kids sounds like a great matchup, but Zack Attack vs Spinelli's Plumbing might be even better with Zack Attack playing the part of the 2022 Buffalo Bills (great on BOTH sides of the ball) and Spinelli's playing the part of the 2022 Kansas City Chiefs (okay their defense is non-existent but it may not matter with how much they'll score).  Sticky Bandits vs Eyes Downtown had an incredible playoff game last year with Sticky Nation winning on the last play of the game.  We doubt that rematch will be boring.  And finally with no disrespect intended to Scott Senior's Starting or Itches and Ohs, we think whoever wins the Bullet Club vs Practice Squad game is going to take the D3 title, so THAT'S one we'll go out of our way to see.  Did we miss any big ones?


GF: You missed my favorite first round matchup between the DILFs and No Punt Intended, but other than that you guys did great as always. Let's get into the real fun of it, and the only reason people are reading this article as it is: The Predictions.





Last Week’s Games:


#7 Scared Hitless 37, #2 Tight Ends In Motion 25

#3 Sticky Bandits 37, #6 Grey Hair Don’t Care 16

#4 Eyes Downtown 42, #5 Passed Our Prime 6


We got our first massive upset out of the way early as Scared Hitless put Tight Ends In Motion to rest early in the playoffs. Sticky and Eyes Downtown took care of business rather easily.


#1 Legends (8-1) vs #7 Scared Hitless (2-6-1)

Points For: Legends 38.00 (2nd), SH 30.78 (5th)

Points Against: Legends 29.56 (4th), SH 37.78 (6th)

TSL Ranking: Legends 5th, SH 43rd

Past Games: Legends 50 - SH 42

Line: Legends (-9)



GF: This isn't exactly the matchup everyone had penciled in here. Scared Hitless proceeded to put TEIM out of their misery, sending them home early. While it was a banner day for Dylan Day and company, the only thing they earned was a "Final Boss" battle against the Legends. The Legends have done excellently in defense of their title, with only a hiccup here or there this season. What's interesting is that Scared Hitless played them VERY tough, losing 50-42 early in the season. If the Legends get caught looking past Scared Hitless for the D1 final, they'll be watching it from the sidelines. Sadly, I think they'll be paying attention during this one and won't get surprised. LEGENDS BY 14


TSLQBPRC: Predictions are more fun when we disagree, and it's a decent bet we will soon... but not on D1.  Can Scared Hitless beat Legends?  Sure, of course, but that line of 14 points is exactly where we would put it.  They'll need a few big plays to steal this one, but we don't see it happening. LEGENDS BY 14


#3 Sticky Bandits (5-3-1) vs #4 Eyes Downtown (5-4)

Points For: SB 34.22 (4th), ED 36.67 (3rd)

Points Against: SB 27.89 (3rd), ED 24.67 (2nd)

TSL Ranking: SB 15th, ED 17th

Past Games: ED 44 - SB 15, SB 36 - ED 24

Line: Eyes Downtown (-3)


GF: Pretty awesome matchup here between two teams that tend to have great games most of the time. With that said, Eyes Downtown blew out Sticky 44-15, but Sticky came back to win by 12 in the second game. I think both of those games are anomalies, and this one is going to come down to a one score game. Eyes Downtown isn't nearly as feared as they once were, since they've been adding pieces season after season instead of getting the continuity they once had in their heyday. On the other hand, Sticky has been nothing but consistent, growing together with just about everyone they started with, adding pieces here and there only when absolutely needed. What you get here is a "family" playing together and for each other, and that's why Sticky is always a tough out. STICKY BANDITS BY 2


TSLQBPRC: Sticky Bandits vs Eyes Downtown is a coin flip to us.  The Sticky Bandits have better chemistry and continuity... Eyes Downtown have a cyborg quarterback sent back in time to score points (and probably kill John Connor).  These teams have nearly always come down to the last drive against each other and we don't expect this to be any different.  We'll take STICKY BANDITS BY 3 to set up the championship rematch.



D1 Final Prediction:  


GF: A D1 Final rematch! The Legends snuck by Sticky in the regular season this year, they snuck by them in the D1 final in the spring, and they're going to sneak by them again this Saturday, but it's going to be closer than ever. LEGENDS BY 1.


TSLQBPRC: Of course Legends murdered the short-handed Bandits in the Finals last spring but every other game these teams have played has come down to the last play.  We expect this one will too... with Boccio making the game sealing play, and Joey somehow stealing all the credit. LEGENDS BY 6





Last Week’s Games:


#2 No Punt Intended 21, #7 The Replacements 0 (FF)

#6 Buffalo Vice Retro 20, #3 Freeballers 17

#4 Dilfs 43, #5 The Untouchaballs 37


The Replacements end their brutal season the only plausible way: forfeiting a playoff game, which is super weak. Speaking of weak, the Freeballers surprise nobody by laying an egg in the playoffs, losing once again to BVR this season. And lastly, the Dilfs won another great game with The Untouchaballs, as they continue to do DILFs things.


#1 Frodo Swaggins (8-1) vs #6 Buffalo Vice Retro (3-6)

Points For: Frodo 36.11 (2nd), BVR 19.11 (6th)

Points Against: Frodo 22.36 (1st), BVR 31.22 (5th)

TSL Ranking: Frodo 2nd, BVR 3th

Past Games: Frodo 29 - BVR 0

Line: Frodo Swaggins (-13)


GF: BVR gets all the credit in the world for coming out and putting together their best game of the season last week in their upset over the Freeballers. But even then, they only won by 3 points. Frodo Swaggins is a much different animal here. The weakest link for Frodo is Garrett, and he’s been excellent this season, so there isn’t a thing that shows me “upset” here. FRODO SWAGGINS BY 17


TSLQBPRC: Buffalo Vice Retro was a nice story beating Freeballers.  But that was a 3-6 team beating a 4-5 team.  Frodo Swaggins is 8-1 and one of their wins came against D1. FRODO SWAGGINS BY 22


#2 No Punt Intended (7-2) vs #4 DILFs (4-5)

Points For: NPI 37.13 (1st), DILFs 35.11 (3rd)

Points Against: NPI 29.00 (3rd), DILFs 35.33 (6th)

TSL Ranking: NPI 10th, DILFs 29th

Past Games: NPI 36 - DILFs 21

Line: NPI (-8)


GF: NPI has looked every bit as unstoppable as Frodo this season, and while I love upsets, and I REALLY, REALLY want to pick the DILFs here, I just love the entire NPI roster and what it can do. As long as Kyle doesn’t mess anything up by being horrible, NPI should take this one. NO PUNT INTENDED BY 3


TSLQBPRC: How did these teams do against each other the first time?  Looks like NPI won by 15 points about a month ago.  We actually think it'll be even worse this time, with DILFS lacking their best weapon in Travis.  NO PUNT INTENDED BY 20.


D2 Final Prediction:


GF: An absolute slobberknocker of a final between the division’s top two teams. They’ve been on a warpath to this moment since the season started in August, and we’re going to see some fireworks. Both teams have very good players, but, to quote B’s Brother “at the end of the day” Frodo just has more firepower and I’m too chicken to pick NPI here. FRODO SWAGGINS BY 6


TSLQBRC: This is the main event of the day, two heavyweights who somehow played each other twice this season but never at anything resembling full strength.  We'd be fools to pick against "undefeated against D2 teams" Kyle Conniff... but we're going to anyway because we believe in Big Game Beesing.  Can we ban Sean Weisensal from D2 forever if Frodo wins?  FRODO SWAGGINS BY 2




Last Week’s Games:


#8 Practice Squad 30, #1 Mountain Dew Me 14

#2 Bullet Club 29, #7 Get Schwifty 15

#6 Itches and Ohs 43, #3 716 35

#4 Scott Senior’s Starting 42, #5 Can’t Touch This 31


Practice Squad continues one of the TSL’s better rivalries, as the pull a pretty big upset over the #1 seeded MDM. Bullet Club handled things to survive Get Schwifty. Itches and Ohs finally looked like the team we know them to be and outdueled 716 for a mild upset, and SSS woke up for the playoffs to take the win over CTT.



#2 Bullet Club (7-2) vs #8 Practice Squad (2-6-1)

Points For: BC 31.38 (3rd), PS 28.89 (5th)

Points Against: BC 23.13 (1st), PS 33.56 (7th)

TSL Ranking: BC 9th, PS 42nd

Past Games: BC 35 - PS 17

Line: Bullet Club (-6)


GF: Practice Squad comes into their big rivalry game and just shuts down Mountain Dew Me last week. All reports back to me say that B was electric, and there’s always something about a MDM game that gets him as hyped as possible. Bullet Club has been good all season, and they bring their top ranked defense into this one, which has forced many turnovers this year. You see teams have a huge letdown all of the time after a huge, emotional win, and last week that’s what PS had. BULLET CLUB BY 8


TSLQBPRC: A couple weeks ago we would have taken Bullet Club without a second thought.  They're the better team this session, with a better record, better offense, better defense, better everything.  But...  Man, B looked like a different guy on Saturday.  Practice Squad just seemed like they were on a MISSION and they didn't carry themselves like underdogs.  If we're looking for an upset (and we are, because we love them) why not here in the TSL's toughest division?  PRACTICE SQUAD BY 4


#4 Scott Senior’s Starting (4-5) vs #6 Itches and Ohs (3-5-1)

Points For: SSS 35.33 (1st), Ohs 24.00 (7th)

Points Against: SSS 33.33 (6th), Ohs 29.89 (5th)

TSL Ranking: SSS 25th, Ohs 31st

Past Games: Ohs 39 - SSS 36

Line: EVEN


GF: The metrics suggest that SSS should be favored, but the Itches offense we saw last week is a lot more accurate than the one that averaged only 24 points a game this season. It was an “off” year for Itches for sure, and they’re better than their record suggests (which they proved last week in beating up on 716). While SSS is a great team with miles of experience, I don’t feel like they have much momentum going into this game, and it just “feels” like an Itches win, so that’s where I’m going with it. ITCHES AND OHS BY 7


TSLQBPRC: Wouldn't it be great if Scott Senior actually started and SSS won the whole damn playoffs?  Instead it's... we're not sure, Newman again?  He's a great QB and they're going to score a lot of points, but Itches always brings an intensity for playoffs that we don't always see in the regular season.  Say what you will about Steve Moser but no one has ever accused him of giving a lazy effort.  We think we'll see another minor upset here as Itches advance.  ITCHES AND OHS BY 2


D3 Finals Predictions:


GF: Bullet Club vs Itches and Ohs. These two teams only met once during the season in a 13-9 Bullet Club win that wasn’t very fun to watch for anyone on the sidelines. Both teams were missing pieces that week, so the game we’ll see here will be completely different. This entire game hinges on whether or not the BC defense can keep the Ohs offense out of the end zone. I think they can. BULLET CLUB BY 9


TSLQBPRC: Practice Squad vs Itches and Ohs. Godfather, we can't IMAGINE we will have the same D3 finals predictions (Note: we do these predictions separately and send them to each other afterwards), because honestly any of these four teams could meet in the Finals.  What a great division.  If it DOES come to Practice Squad vs Itches (an #8 seed and a #6 seed...) remember that they've played each other twice this season with Itches going 1-0-1 in those games.  And yet... B ups the intensity every round.  We could see him falling in the Quarterfinals, maybe even the Semis, but losing in the Finals?  This is the guy that almost beat "world-beater Mountain Dew Me" a few sessions ago.  We won't bet against Practice Squad in the finals. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 6




Last Week’s Games:


#8 Travis Henry’s Kids 56, #1 Cunning Stunts 25

#2 Puckett All-Stars 42, #7 Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 6

#3 Zack Attack 56, #6 Vaspian 18

#5 Spinelli’s Plumbing 48, #4 Buffalo Vice 43


Points. Points everywhere. Travis Henry’s Kids become the newest team to kick the Stunts out of the playoffs after they terrorized everyone in the regular season, while showing that maybe they were better than an 8 seed. Puckett just demolished ILF up and down the field, and Zack Attack did the same with Vaspian. Spinelli’s squeaked by Buffalo Vice in a fantastic game that saw both offenses light things up.


#2 Puckett All-Stars (8-1) vs #8 Travis Henry’s Kids (3-6)

Points For: PAS 42.89 (2nd), THK 28.44 (6th)

Points Against: PAS 29.56 (3rd), THK 32.44 (6th)

TSL Ranking: PAS 3rd, THK 38th

Past Games: PAS 48 - THK 19

Line: Puckett All-Stars (-12)


GF: THK took down the Stunts last week, and get arguably a harder task this weekend, getting a Puckett All-Stars team that has now won 9 straight games. Their only loss was to the Stunts in Week 1, a team that THK has now beaten in two consecutive weeks. It’s been a fun couple of weeks for THK, but PAS is on another level right now. PUCKETT ALL-STARS BY 8


TSLQBPRC: Puckett would have been the favorites here even if THK had their "top guy" Pete Walbrandt.  But they don't.  So... Puckett by a lot? PUCKETT BY A LOT (LET’S SAY 19)


#3 Zack Attack (6-3) vs #5 Spinelli’s Plumbing (4-4-1)

Points For: ZA 33.67 (5th), SP 39.33 (3rd)

Points Against: ZA 22.33 (1st), SP 36.22 (8th)

TSL Ranking: ZA 12th, SP 21st

Past Games: ZA 36 - SP 14

Line: Zack Attack (-8)


GF: Both of these teams can put up some offense normally, but let’s face it, Spinelli’s has struggled against the division’s top defenses. If they can’t score at will, they still can’t stop anyone (as shown by their 8th ranked defense). While we’d love to watch a shootout, Zack Attack’s defense is going to stop Spinelli’s a bunch more times than they stop ZA’s offense, and I expect to see a game similar to the 36-14 battle they had this season. ZACK ATTACK BY 16


TSLQBPRC: This has potential to be the game of the day.  We like Zack Attack because they can do a little of everything, but Spinelli's has the firepower to surprise everyone.  We just don't think they will.  ZACK ATTACK BY 9


D4 Finals Predictions:


GF: This is a world class game we have right here. Both Puckett and Zack Attack can score, and yeah, they can stop you too. These two teams are even all over the place, as evidenced by a 32-31 Puckett win in their only meeting this season, but it just felt like Puckett has been on a mission the entire season, and that chip on their shoulder will give them the edge to replicate that early season result. This feels like a “last play of the game for the championship” type of battle. PUCKETT ALL-STARS BY 1


TSLQBPRC: The two best teams in D4 (sorry Stunts!) will slug it out for the championship in the last game of the day.  Both are worthy of winning and moving up to D3.  But it's harder to be the favorite with the burden of expectations, and easier to be the "no one believed in us" underdog, so we'll say ZACK ATTACK BY 3




Last Week’s Games:


#3 Passing While Intoxicated 23, #6 Let’s Get Reccked 15

#5 Today’s Feast 14, #4 Woodpeckers 13


Passing While Intoxicated handled Let’s Get Reccked, but much more noteworthy is the big win by Today’s Feast, getting by the Woodpeckers in a mild upset.


#1 TMA (7-2) vs #5 Today’s Feast (3-6)

Points For: TMA 34.89 (1st), TF 24.44 (4th)

Points Against: TMA 25.00 (3rd), TF 30.89 (6th)

TSL Ranking: TMA 8th, TF 39th

Past Games: TMA 27 - TF 14, TMA 48 - TF 40

Line: TMA (-13)


GF: TMA seems to have gotten their losing out of the way early this season, and last year’s surprise loss to a weaker PWI has them not taking anyone lightly. They’ve mostly dominated Today’s Feast on the field, including a large comeback win a couple of weeks ago. When TMA is on, nobody can touch them. Today’s Feast had a great win, and like I’ve said 400 times this year, they’re improving every time they touch the field. This one just ain’t it for them. TMA BY 17


TSLQBPRC: TMA won both of their matchups this season, first by 13 and then by 8.  Feast should put up a fight, but that's all they'll do. TMA BY 11


#2 Come From Behind (6-3) vs #3 Passing While Intoxicated (4-4-1)

Points For: CFB 31.33 (2nd), PWI 25.89 (3rd)

Points Against: CFB 21.33 (1st), PWI 24.89 (2nd)

TSL Ranking: CFB 14th, PWI 22nd)

Past Games: CFB 46 - PWI 20, PWI 30 - CFB 16

Line: CFB (-4)


GF: This is a story of two teams going in different directions. CFB hasn’t been winning much recently, while PWI have been playing great. I won’t take a thing away from PWI, they’ve started to gel together and they’re becoming one of the TSL’s up and coming teams. We learned last year that they tend to peak in the playoffs. The problem for them is that they came out and punched TMA and CFB in the mouth right before playoffs, which took away their element of surprise. CFB is arguably the best team overall (according to the metrics) in the division, but they haven’t played well since the weather turned. Good thing for them it’s going to be 70 degrees this weekend, and that should let the old joints that are on that roster get moving properly again. COME FROM BEHIND BY 6


Come From Behind haven't had a quality win in like a month, and Passing While Intoxicated have had nothing BUT quality wins.  Oh, Come From Behind is still a much better team on paper, but we don't decide winners on paper. PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED BY 3


D5 Final Prediction:


GF: The top two teams in D5 meet again, as we get the third match between TMA and Come From Behind. TMA won the first meeting by a single point, but then won again a week later by 21. I expect we’ll see a game a lot more like the first meeting. Unless Paul dials up some magic from 1979, we’ll see TMA take home the gold. TMA BY 2


TSLQBPRC: Passing While Intoxicated you scrappy little underdogs, we expect you to still be fighting come the D5 Finals.  And you won't give a bad effort either.  But TMA are better than you, and although they won't play to their full potential, it'll still be enough. TMA BY 5




Last Week’s Games:


#6 Punt Cakes 24, #3 Superior Moser Squad 17

#4 Two Tuddies 53, #5 Lenny’s Ladies 10


The Punt Cakes pull off the D6 version of the “big upset” and the Two Tuddies remain incredibly hot.


#1 Not So Sticky (8-1) vs #6 Punt Cakes (2-7)

Points For: NSS 37.22 (1st), PC 31.13 (3rd)

Points Against: NSS 24.78 (2nd), PC 31.63 (5th)

TSL Ranking: NSS 4th, PC 45th

Past Games: NSS 40 - PC 39, NSS 27 - PC 26

Line: NSS (-6)


GF: On paper, this game should be a no-nonsense blowout. An 8-1 team taking on a 2-7 team that hasn’t been all that great? If you look at “Past Games”, Punt Cakes has taken NSS to the limit twice, losing two games by one point. They’re a much better team than you think they are, and in their minds they HAVE to know they can beat NSS, especially if NSS is at the bar for hours beforehand. PUNT CAKES BY 1


TSLQBPRC: People keep saying Not So Sticky will be "too drunk" to take this game seriously.  And that's true.  But Not So Sticky always does well in the playoffs despite their intoxication (remember when they almost beat freakin' Spinelli's??).  We expect a close game.  They've played each other twice before this season, with NSS winning by 1 the first time and... winning by 1 the second time.  Why change it now? NOT SO STICKY BY 1


#2 Blitzkrieg (6-3) vs #4 Two Tuddies (3-6)

Points For: BK 34.00 (2nd), TT 23.33 (5th)

Points Against: BK 24.00 (1st), TT 28.78 (4th)

TSL Ranking: BK 13th, TT 33rd

Past Games: BK 30 - TT 14, TT 31 - BK 23

Line: Blitzkrieg (-11)


GF: The Two Tuddies have been on the best run in their short history, and I’m happy to see them doing well. BUT, sorry to be the bearer of bad news, they didn’t magically wake up drinking “Mike’s Secret Stuff” from Space Jam and become world beaters. In reality, while they’re 3-0 in the last two weeks, they won two games on a very blustery/cold day, and then last week they got to feast on “Playoff Langley” in the wind and rain. They’re shaping up to be a very good bad weather team, but on a 70 degree day with no wind (like Saturday!) they’ve yet to prove themselves. Blitzkrieg has been waiting to win D6 for what feels like forever now. Add into the fact that they will NOT look past the Tud Buds after the upset two weeks ago, and I don’t see them losing to them again. BLITZKRIEG BY 13


TSLQBPRC: Two Tuddies has captured the hearts of the TSL and everyone who has talked to this team seems to be rooting for them.  Blitzkrieg are the better team though, right?  Do the Tuddies have an answer for Mackenzie Neary? BLITZKRIEG BY 10


D6 Finals Predictions:


GF: Blitzkrieg vs Punt Cakes, just as everyone predicted. These two teams never faced off this season (Punt Cakes forfeited the only matchup) so there’s not a ton to go on, except for the fact that I’ve supported Blitzkrieg for forever now. History is here, waiting for them. Finally. This is their moment, their shot to finally do what they’ve always wanted. What I’ve always wanted for them. No stupid Punt Cakes (sorry guys, its a thing here) will stand in their way. BLITZKRIEG BY 100 (or really like 12)


TSLQBPRC: In a division where anyone really can win any game, somehow, we've picked the two favorites.  That's boring.  But it's probably also accurate.  These teams have battled it out twice to the very end.  Why not make it three great games for the season?  Not So Sticky's drinking catches up to them and they fall to Blitzkrieg... then order more shots.  BLITZKRIEG BY 5




  1. Who is the most important player in each division’s title race?



  1. The most important player in D1 is Joey Batts. If he has a good game, Legends wins, it's that simple. Their only path to failure is him throwing picks. 
  2. D2 is Kyle Conniff, as the QB and best defender for Frodo's only real contender. They're not winning the title without a big day from Kyle. 
  3. Jeff Easton might be the most important player in D3 as the QB for the highest seeded team remaining. He's been great this season, but how will he respond if Bullet Club gets punched in the mouth and falls behind 14-0 early? 
  4. We've taken three QBs so far (what do you want from us, we write a weekly article about QBs) but we'll go with Misty Himes and Sam Lattuca in D4 (yeah we're cheating and taking two). Zack Attack has the edge on best girls and that HAS to be the difference if they want to win a championship on Saturday. 
  5. For D5 how about Buddy Lee? The top two teams are so stacked that they can win with an off day from just about anyone.  For PWI to keep their momentum going, they need a big game from Buddy.
  6. Chris Wolcott from Two Tuddies for D6. He's so athletic he gives them a chance to win every game.  If he ever has an off day (he hasn't yet) his team is in trouble

GF: The most important player for each division race? Hmm. In D1, it's Dylan Day. If he can continue to dial up some excellent play, with the weapons he has, there’s always a chance that if he doesn’t turn the ball over, we can see another huge upset. In D2, all eyes are on Garrett Beesing. That man is locked in, but he’s historically crumbled (mostly) in the playoffs, and with all of the pressure will he crack? In D3, It’s none other than B on Practice Squad. He put the team on his shoulders to beat the rivals in MDM last week, but he’s got an even tougher task this week. In D4, it's the entire Zack Attack Defense. If they can continue to shut down everyone, including juggernaut Puckett, they’re going to be partying all night long. In D5 it's Ryan Henry on TMA. He has the weapons, and as long as he plays it cool and just plays his game, TMA will be walking into D4 in the spring. In D6, it's Light Red Hoodie Guy. Besides being a TSL staple for quite some time, he took over some (partial?) duties at QB and Blitzkrieg hasn’t really missed a step. If LRHG plays well, D6 is theirs.


  1. Who's winning Breakfast Club?


TSLQBPRC: Garrett fucking Beesing, that's who's winning Breakfast Club.  And here's a spoiler for next Spring too, he's winning it again.  Three time back-to-back champ, you heard it here first.  No one knows how to seamlessly integrate a mix of experienced and inexperienced players like Garrett does.  All fun, no stress, he's the guy you want to be your Breakfast Club captain.  So we'll take Team Jennacide for the championship.


GF: Steph Infection. Steph has once again built a team that has made it to the finals, and when people didn’t think her team would win it last session, they prevailed. Newman has played lights out for this squad, as he continues to prove that it's a joke he isn’t a starting QB for someone in this league. That will change come spring.



  1. Most Underrated teams in the TSL that could shock everyone?


TSLQBPRC: If girls are the "difference maker" in this League (and we all know they are) why isn't Scared Hitless getting more credit going into Championship weekend?  They beat Tight Ends in Motion already, would it be THAT shocking if they beat Legends and then won the Finals?  We won't take anyone in D3 because frankly NONE of those teams would be shocking to win, so our last pick will be Punt Cakes.  Not ONE of you is talking about Punt Cakes (other than maybe on the Punt Cakes team chat) but they've been solid all season and they play well against the best teams.  It wouldn't surprise us at all if they went all the way.


GF: This feels so weird to say that they’re being underrated, but the DILFs are being completely overlooked here. Everyone's so focused on Frodo vs No Punt Intended that it probably means one of those teams won’t even make the D2 finals, as is TSL tradition. The DILFs have a ton of talent, and as long as Dubey is throwing that rock, they can beat anyone, or at least surprise everyone.


  1. What is the storyline no one is talking about but should be?


TSLQBPRC: Puckett All-Stars are the favorites to win D4, which would tie Public Enemy for most championships in league history with five. Granted, it would be more impressive if they moved up after winning divisions (this would be their record third title in the same division) but it's still noteworthy.


GF: The greatest storyline we aren’t talking about much is that Sean Weisensal can potentially win a D1/D2 double championship for the second straight year in a row, and I don't think we’ll ever see anything quite like that again for a while. If he pulls it off.


  1. Who do you MOST and LEAST want to see win championships?


TSLQBPRC: MOST - either Travis Henry’s Kids (if for no reason other than to make Langley look ridiculous for wanting to be in D5) or Two Tuddies after going winless last season in their debut. LEAST - Scott Senior’s Starting purely for their failure to deliver on promises of Scott Senior.


GF: MOST - I think It's pretty clear I want Blitzkrieg to win the most at this point. They deserve it. WE deserve it. LEAST - Eyes Downtown. I had to pick someone, so I'll pick the team that has a bunch of players more worried about a lame flag league than the TSL.




1) Don't want the season to end this week?  It doesn't have to!  Contact a League official or find Emily Schilling at the fields on Saturday and ask about Halloween Bowl on October 29th


2) Breakfast Club Prediction: Steph Infection 37, Jennacide 26.


3) Winter session is coming, and people are already forming their teams.  Don't get left out!  Winters in Buffalo can be a lonely time without all your TSL friends.  Reach out to a League official if you have any questions, and the League will be emailing captains in the next week or two with more details on registration.


4) Even if your team has been eliminated in the Race for Social Co-Ed Immortality, you should still come out to watch some great football and have a few drinks with the league! It’ll be a perfect day for it!


5) While your whole team is gathered together on Saturday basking in victory (or wallowing in defeat, I don't care) why not remind them of the 2022 Awards Banquet?  It should be Friday December 9th at the Hotel Lafayette.  Details will be sent soon, but tell your teammates to save the date now.


6) Is the reigning TSL Executive of the Year going to finally make an appearance this Saturday for more than an hour or so?? If he does, it is your sworn duty as a player in this League to make sure he doesn't pay for a single drink all day.


7) Shout out to Garrett (again, it seems) for taking over the mantle of Head of Officiating this season. It’s not a fun job at times, and there were definitely some bumps along the way this season, but he always kept a positive attitude and listened to criticism. He took the job very seriously and did well.


8) Other shout outs go out to Travis for dealing with the sublist requests every week and then arguing with teams about why they can’t stack their squad with subs. Jeff Krol gets a huge shout out for doing a lot of the “Topper Work” this season. Joe K and Emily Schilling did a really nice job on the podcast this year as well. (Which, if you want to be on it this week, find one of the above people and request an appearance!)


9) 70 degrees and sunny is the perfect weather to end a touch football season in Western New York.  We'd hate to be some other Leagues that started late and will likely finish in the snow...


10) …and don’t forget your sunscreen for Championship Saturday. And don’t be jerks to the refs.



That’s it, we’re here. The next stop is the finish line as the Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality comes to an end for the Fall 2022 season. Which teams will get to call themselves the undisputed best Co-ed football teams in WNY? Let’s find out.




Category: The Godfather's Picks
Created: Friday, 07 October 2022 14:07
Published: Friday, 07 October 2022 14:07
Written by Jeff Krol
Hits: 173


            Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, the Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality is almost here. What do you mean we’ve been playing for 7 weeks already? That’s just the preseason. Everyone knows the TSL “regular season” is just an excuse to practice for the end of season tournament known as the playoffs (except for those of you in D4, who will sadly have 2 teams miss out on the Playoff Excitement) and test out your livers at the bar.


            The Regular Season isn’t exactly “pointless”, as it fosters rivalries, fun times, and really gives teams a chance to figure things out. And of course, while only D4 has teams in danger of not being a part of the Race for Social Co-Ed Football Immortality, the other divisions (besides YOU D3) have bye weeks to play for.


            “But all wise and knowing Godfather, why would a team want a bye week? Don’t they want to play football and not get rusty?!?!”


            Only if they’re idiots. If there’s one thing that can be promised for the playoffs, it's that crazy things will happen. Top seeds will lose to bottom seeds. Favorites for the championship will be sent home early. Even the “Slam Dunks” out there. One of the biggest reasons everyone loves this league is because everyone (except for you, Freeballers) has a legit chance to make some magic happen and win the championship. Getting the bye week ensures that you’ll be on the field during Championship Saturday, and that’s the only way to guarantee that. Or, well, being in D2 and finishing 2nd to play The Replacements. That might be a guarantee too.


            So before we get into what’s at stake this week for each divisional race, let’s remind the TSL Universe about the answer to the most asked question in the final week of ANY TSL regular season: What are the tiebreakers?


The first tiebreaker, of course, is “Points”, which are awarded as 3 points for a win, and 1 for a Tie. But most of you know that already. The next tiebreaker is Head to Head. Most teams have played each other at least once, so if you beat the team you’re tied with, you finish above them. Makes sense. But what if you played twice and split the series? Well, we move on to Head to Head Score Differential. What that means is combined score in all of your games against the team you’re tied with, apparently among common opponents? I don’t fully understand Topper’s weird formulas either. If you’re magically tied after this, it goes to overall Point Differential, and then just Points For. If you’re tied after all of that, your captains will be locked in a cage against Cookie Monster, Elmo, and B’s Brother, and whoever escapes first will win. Basically, beat the team you’re playing and don’t leave it up to something Topper invented.


There are a few things at stake in just about every single division, so the games this week matter to a degree. Let’s get into it.





Last Week’s Games:


Legends 36, Tight Ends In Motion 30

Sticky Bandits 36, Eyes Downtown 24

Grey Hair Don’t Care 33, Scared Hitless 33 (TIE)

Passed Our Prime 21, The Replacements 0 (Forfeit)


The Legends immediately get their win back and I was told there were fireworks afterwards. We’ve got ourselves a D1 rivalry! We haven’t had teams yelling at each other since the glory days of Public Enemy and Eyes Downtown, and what do these two “disagreements” full of smack talk have in common? Boccio and Heather. Not a surprise. Sticky Bandits finally beat someone ahead of them in the standings, as they begin to peak at the right time. Grey Hair Don’t Care and Scared Hitless battle hard against each other in a tie, and Hogan is saved the embarrassment from losing to The Replacements as they had to forfeit.



What’s At Stake: The fate of the TSL Universe. But not really. Tight Ends In Motion can secure the bye week with a win this week in a D1/D2 Crossover Game with Frodo Swaggins. If the Legends win, and TEIM loses, they get the bye. As for the others, Sticky can win both of their games and finish 3rd overall over Eyes Downtown, and the bottom half of the division can get all jumbled up as well.



This Week’s Games:


Legends vs Eyes Downtown (+6) - This game means a lot for the Legends, as both Sean and Joey were in my email inbox this week crying over their rankings for some reason. As a result, I think they’re in “prove it” mode, and they’ll want to finish out strong. Eyes Downtown doesn’t have much to play for, they’re in 3rd or 4th either way. LEGENDS BY 12


Sticky Bandits vs Passed Our Prime (+20) - What a season for POP. It just feels like they were never able to fully replace Kyle/Sean and as a result they’ve suffered for it. A date with TEIM/Legends in the first round seems to be their fate. Sticky, however, is on the upswing. It hasn’t been a top season for them, but they’ve still proceeded to show up each week. They should blow POP out. STICKY BANDITS BY 17


Sticky Bandits vs Grey Hair Don’t Care (+10) - Grey Hair attempts to have that late season magic once more, but it's proving harder in D1. 2-5-1 isn’t a season to remember and chances are they’ll be running for the bus (literally, i believe) in this one. Sticky needs this game to probably secure 3rd place, so they’ll be all business. STICKY BANDITS BY 14


Scared Hitless vs Passed Our Prime (+6) - Scared Hitless seems to have stagnated a little bit this season, perhaps they’re just trying to get to the playoffs and then kick it up a notch. I was surprised to see them tie Grey Hair, and it feels like they’re ripe for the picking against a hungrier POP squad. PASSED OUR PRIME BY 2




Tight Ends In Motion vs Frodo Swaggins (+7) - I hope both teams are at full strength, because it’ll be nice to see if the rumors of “Frodo is a D1 team” are true. In reality, other than seeing how well they’d fare in D1, Frodo has nothing to play for. They’ve clinched the number one seed in D2 (even with a loss) thanks to beating NPI worse than NPI beat them. TEIM is playing for the bye in D1, so they “need” this game a bit more. TIGHT ENDS IN MOTION BY 12





Last Week’s Games:


Frodo Swaggins 51, No Punt Intended 12

Buffalo Vice Retro 37, The Untouchaballs 36

Freeballers 34, DILFs 32


Frodo beats up on a weak NPI team to claim the D2 bye for the playoffs, Buffalo Vice Retro upsets The Untouchaballs as whispers about replacing Seth for the future start to get louder, and the Freeballers probably got the DILFs drunk at the bar before the game, beating them by 2 to take sole possession of 3rd place.


What’s At Stake:  Honestly, not too much. Frodo Swaggins has already clinched 1st and the bye, and No Punt Intended has already clinched 2nd place and The Replacements (7 seed, also a basic bye). That leaves the 3-6, 4-5 matchups to be decided, and that’s where things get fun. If the Freeballers win, they finish 3rd, with the Dilfs/BVR winner in 4th. If the Dilfs win, and The Untouchaballs beat The Replacements, UT finishes ahead of BVR based on the head to head differential. If Freeballers lose, and BVR wins, BVR finishes 3rd based on a 20-13 victory over Freeballers. If Freeballers lose and Dilfs win, Freeballers win that tiebreaker. The point is, a lot of shaking up can happen here between the 3-6 teams in the division.



This Week’s Games:


No Punt Intended vs Freeballers (+7) - This game probably means next to nothing for NPI, as they’re more focused on keeping everyone healthy for the playoffs. It means a lot to the Freeballers who are desperate to be considered legit contenders for the throne in D2, but are still seen as a step or two below the Frodo/NPIs of the world. Even with that, I expect NPI to barely show up and Freeballers take home a big win. FREEBALLERS BY 8


DILFs vs Buffalo Vice Retro (+7) - As described above, a pretty big game for each team, although I’m sure they care who they play in the playoffs. Props to BVR for finally seeming to figure things out. They’re winning and looking a lot more like a contender than they had in the first few weeks of the season. The DILFs are right on schedule with their 4-5 or 3-6 record, and then Dubey will show up in the playoffs and they’ll end up playing in the finals somehow. BVR keeps the good times rolling. BUFFALO VICE RETRO BY 3


The Untouchaballs vs The Replacements (+25) - Not exactly the season that UT dreamed when they joined D2, but then again I guess I could say the same for The Replacements too. Not much to say here, Burr and Company get it together before the playoffs. THE UNTOUCHABALLS BY 19





Last Week’s Games:


Scott Seniors Starting 34, Bullet Club 25

Bullet Club 39, Can’t Touch This 26

Practice Squad 37, 716 28

Get Schwifty 46, Can’t Touch This 8

716 27, Get Schwifty 16

Mountain Dew Me 42, Itches and Ohs 25



D3 continues to be pretty tight everywhere in the standings, Bullet Club drops a game to Scott Seniors Starting before going 1-1 after beating Can’t Touch This, who would lose to Get Schwifty, who would then lose to 716, who had just lost to Practice Squad. Somewhere in there, Mountain Dew Me smacked around Itches and Ohs too.



What’s At Stake: Seeding galore! It’s an 8 team division here, so everyone is going to make the playoffs. But who’s playing who? Bullet Club is leading the division at 6-2, and even with a victory over Get Schwifty, they can’t clinch 1st overall. The “controversial” loss to Mountain Dew Me means that if MDM wins both of their games this week, They’ll finish 1st overall in D3. 716 is currently in 2nd place at 5-3, but they play MDM. If 716 wins this game, Bullet Club loses theirs, and MDM goes on to beat Can't Touch This, all of them will be 6-3. Some fancy tiebreaker math says that in this scenario, the Head To Head games would have 716 at 2-1, Bullet Club at 1-1, and MDM at 1-2, in which case, MDM gets eliminated and it goes to BC vs 716, which BC beat them, and we’d finish Bullet Club 1st, 716 2nd, MDM 3rd. I think. This is when Topper’s magic machine just does its work and everything I just said is probably wrong. It just gets worse from there. Practice Squad and Itches and Ohs play for who finishes 8th. The winner can move up higher with a Get Schwifty loss, and if CTT loses both of their games they could move up as high as 5th. CTT could win both and jump from 6th to 4th. This entire division is a complete mess seedings wise.



This Week’s Games:


716 vs Mountain Dew Me (+3) - Game of the day potential. 716 already beat MDM once before, and a win here gives them 2nd place for sure. MDM has been on a pretty good streak this season after a slow start, and they have 1st place in their sights. I’m voting for max chaos in the standings. 716 BY 1


Mountain Dew Me vs Can’t Touch This (+10) - CTT could get TONS of momentum with two massive wins over MDM (and SSS after this). People have talked for the longest time about how handsome/talented Ryan Dougherty is, and it was this time last season that CTT shocked the world and rolled to the D4 title game. With Anthony “The Better” Battaglia there as well now, maybe its time for an upset. CAN'T TOUCH THIS BY 7


Scott Seniors Starting vs Can’t Touch This (+8) - SSS gets a downgrade at QB this week as Scotty Dro takes over for Dylan Jaloza who subbed last weekend. CTT might shock the world an hour earlier, but not twice. SCOTT SENIORS STARTING BY 8


Bullet Club vs Get Schwifty (+9) - Bullet Club took the victory in Week 1 of the season when these two teams met. Since then, Schwifty has been up and down, but they’ve been better as of late as the team starts to meld together. BC has lost 2 of their last 3, but they’ve been in both of the losses. BC will know before the game starts if it means anything (MDM going 2-0 means BC will be 2nd no matter what) which will affect the outcome. BULLET CLUB BY 8


Practice Squad vs Itches and Ohs (EVEN) - These two teams already tied once, so they’re evenly matched. Don’t look now though, but Practice Squad might be starting to get it together at the right time. Meanwhile, Itches and Ohs feels like they’re just off this whole season. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 10




Last Week’s Games:


Vaspian 27, Spinelli’s Plumbing 18

Buffalo Vice 50, TOX 8

Buffalo Vice 47, Travis Henry’s Kids 20

Puckett All-Stars 48, Travis Henry’s Kids 19

Zack Attack 39, Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 8

Zack Attack 48, Cobblestone 12

Cunning Stunts 53, Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 36


Vaspian shuts Spinelli’s down and announces they’re a force in D4. Buffalo Vice goes off against teams that they were in the “race” for missing the playoffs in, and they clinch a playoff spot. Puckett continues to dominate. Zack Attack showed last week was a hiccup, and they just continue to dump points on the league, going 2-0. THK and ILF both go 0-2 in games they should probably be trying harder to win in. The Stunts also walk to 8-0 with a relatively easy win.


What’s At Stake: Not much at the top. The Stunts will make a run at being 9-0, and Puckett is right behind them at 7-1. There will be some movement for the 3-7 seeds, but the REAL fun is right there at the bottom of the standings. Right now, NOBODY is officially eliminated from the playoffs (probably). Our wild tiebreakers can come into play for who makes and misses the playoffs between THK (2-6), Cobblestone (1-7), and TOX (1-7). Here are the scenarios:


            -If THK wins against the Cunning Stunts, THK clinches the 8 seed, TOX and Cobblestone are eliminated.


            -If THK loses and :

  1. Cobblestone wins against Vaspian, TOX wins against Zack Attack - All teams are tied with a 2-7 record, which goes to Head to Head between them all. All 3 teams are 1-1 against each other. This means its up to Topper’s Magic Machine after that, and I still don’t know what will happen. I *think* TOX MAKES PLAYOFFS, THK and Cobblestone Eliminated, but in reality this could be completely wrong. In the interest of TOX having something to play for, I’m going to say this is what happens.
  2. Cobblestone wins, TOX loses - COBBLESTONE MAKES PLAYOFFS, THK (as a result of a 27-7 loss to Cobblestone) and TOX Eliminated
  3. Cobblestone loses, TOX wins - THK MAKES PLAYOFFS, Cobblestone and TOX (as a result of 41-19 loss to THK) Eliminated


Wild things are at stake here.


This Week’s Games:


Puckett All-Stars vs Spinelli’s Plumbing (+7) - Puckett has been fantastic since becoming “All We Do Is Qwinn Lite”, and it's awesome. They’ve been incredibly fun to hear about all season and this is no different. Spinelli’s got a bit humbled last weekend, and I expect a bounce back. Take the over in this one. SPINELLI’S PLUMBING BY 8


Buffalo Vice vs Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (+8)  - Buffalo Vice is really starting to figure it out, and at the same time ILF is struggling. They’re without their QB for the rest of the season and they just look discombobulated. It's not the year of the ILF. BUFFALO VICE BY 12


Vaspian vs Cobblestone (+6) - Cobblestone isn’t dead, but there’s not much to suggest that they’re up for this challenge. It’s been an off year for Darryl, and unfortunately I think it ends with him and his crew missing the playoffs. VASPIAN BY 9


Cunning Stunts vs Travis Henry’s Kids (+17) - The entire world knows what the girls can do. They’re more than likely going to score on every possession, so THK needs to follow suit. They’ll need to get gender TDs along the way, but with the playoffs on the line, nobody would blame John Langley for just throwing bombs to Pistol Pete on every single play. The girls are very good, but there isn’t one of them that will be able to match up with him. Of course, does this essentially count as a playoff game? If so, +17 might not be enough points to give with Playoff Langley hanging around. CUNNING STUNTS BY 12


Zack Attack vs TOX (+13) - TOX comes into this game with a playoff spot potentially on the line. As stated above, TOX needs a Cobblestone win to stay alive in the playoff race and they’ll know ahead of time if they get it or not. Hopefully they get the weak version of Zack Attack at 3:00 and sneak one out. Probably not though. ZACK ATTACK BY 18





Last Week’s Games:


Come From Behind 26, Woodpeckers 14

Passing While Intoxicated 24, TMA 14

Woodpeckers 45, Today’s Feast 8

Let’s Get Reccked 35, Today’s Feast 22


Come From Behind continues to roll against any team that isn’t TMA. Speaking of TMA, they’ve now lost two in a row and seem to be primed to blow it in the playoffs yet again. The Woodpeckers hung tough with CFB and then blew out Today’s Feast, who went 0-2 this week as they also lost to LGR.


What’s At Stake: TMA and CFB have the two bye weeks locked up. If they both win, TMA takes the #1 seed based off their 2 wins over CFB this year. There can be some movement in the 3-6 matchups. If LGR beats the Woodpeckers, they can jump Today’s Feast if TF loses to TMA. PWI can finish 3rd with a win over CFB, but a loss and a WP win gives the Peckers 3rd.


This Week’s Games:


Come From Behind vs Passing While Intoxicated (+10) - PWI seems to get the better of TMA, but not so much for CFB. Come From Behind gets ready for the playoffs. COME FROM BEHIND BY 18


Woodpeckers vs Let’s Get Reccked (+7) - Woodpeckers have been pretty good as of late, now that their team shows up. They really got in the zone they were in just before they surprised everyone with a D6 title. They’ll be a hard out in the playoffs. WOODPECKERS BY 10


TMA vs Today’s Feast (+12) - If there’s a team in the TSL that needs a “get right” game, it’s TMA. They’ve been losing games they should be winning, and they know it. They’re too talented to mess up another “should be” title at this point, right? Today’s Feast has been as good as they ever were, but they’re just not quite on TMA’s level currently. TMA BY 8





Last Week’s Games:


Blitzkrieg 42, Superior Moser Squad 9

Not So Sticky 27, Punt Cakes 26


BK and NSS continue to dominate the division, as BK takes a nice win over SMS and NSS sneaks by Punt Cakes.



What’s At Stake: NSS already has the #1 seed wrapped up, as they have the tiebreaker over Blitzkrieg by 1 point (again, I think anyway, can’t stress this enough). Right now, SMS and Lenny’s Ladies have the 3 and 4 seeds. SMS is guaranteed to be either of those seeds, but Lenny’s Ladies could lose to NSS and the Tuddies this weekend to end up in a potential three way tie (if the Cakes and the Tuddies win their other games as well). There are quite a few options here as well.



This Week’s Games:


Superior Moser Squad vs Punt Cakes (+2) - SMS is looking to end the season on a high note after a few hiccups,  while Punt Cakes is getting to the finish line looking pretty strong. They just took on NSS and almost beat them. They’re peaking at the right moment. PUNT CAKES BY 8


Lenny’s Ladies vs Two Tuddies (+8) - Lenny’s Ladies look awesome some weeks, and other weeks they just can’t quite get into the end zone. They shouldn’t have that issue against the Tuddies, who are still working on how defense works, and I’m not sure the Tud Buds have the females to keep up with the gender TDs. LENNY’S LADIES BY 6


Not So Sticky vs Lenny’s Ladies (+13) - The last time these two teams met, NSS blew out the Ladies with Jeff Krol at QB. Now they’re going to get their “usual” QB behind center, (but not their best, Christine)which means things might be even more of a blowout here. NOT SO STICKY BY 20


Blitzkrieg vs Two Tuddies (+10) - Blitzkrieg looks every bit the part of a Spring D5 team whether they win or not. The Tuddies are just not on their level right now. BLITZKRIEG BY 17




  1. What’s the most interesting race we have this weekend? Considering that not a single team in D4 is officially eliminated yet, it HAS to be that race. A Cobblestone win at 1:00 puts INCREDIBLE pressure on John Langley, and THK will have to beat the Stunts to get into the playoffs. On top of that, TOX will also be playing at the same time as THK, and they’ll be going for a playoff spot too. A Cobblestone loss at 1:00 is the worst thing, as THK will have clinched and there won’t be any drama at 3:00.\
  2. What happened between Legends and Tight Ends In Motion? That’s easy. Alphas are going to alpha. Lots of smack talk was flying around by both teams in a close game. With all due respect to the rest of D1 (or, at least, Eyes Downtown and Sticky Bandits), we NEED a Legends vs TEIM rubber match for the D1 title. That’s just great watching.
  3. What’s going on in Breakfast Club? The first round of the playoffs start this week. To nobody’s surprise, Amber Alert finished 6-0 and got a bye. Steph Infection went 5-1 and took the other. The Special Kay’s got first overall pick Jeremy Streit back and have since gone 2-0 to jump into BC contention. The Messy Jessie’s still haven’t had a game with a full team, unfortunately. Perhaps the first playoff game is the perfect time to do so?
  4. We have an excellent week of TSL football with lots of games having meaning. What ruins it? First off, it’s Fall Fest weekend and like every year, people will be leaving the fields right away to get down to Ellicottville so they can stand at bars that are overcrowded and 6 people deep. Some won’t even show up to the games because they have a bus or a house down there. That’s going to skew some rosters for sure. The other issue is that Buffalo is looking like it’s going to be QUITE windy this Saturday, with winds getting up to 20 mph in 50 degree weather. It’s not going to be great. But that usually gives us some fun games and interesting results.
  5. How do I sign up for Halloween Bowl? For anyone that’s officially heard, Jeff Krol announced on the podcast that the TSL will be having a fun, costume bowl like we used to do for “The 4 o’clock game”. This will include drinking on the fields and playing in costumes. If you want to sign up, you can tell Jeff, Joe K, Emily Schilling, or anyone else and they should be taking down names. The hope is to get 36 people (24 guys, 12 women at least) to dress up and play some costume football for a day. It’s ALWAYS a good time. It’s happening on 10/29, the time is TBD but will more than likely be around 11 or 12. The bar is also giving “Spooky Specials” to costumed participants. Buy a costume, put on an old one, and get out there!





  1. I can’t believe football is already in its last week. The season goes by so incredibly fast every single time. Hopefully you’re all cherishing these last few weeks.
  2. The Banquet is here! Officially, the World’s Greatest Party, our “Wedding without the Wedding” is coming back after THREE years without it. Our last banquet was in December of 2019, before Covid ruined the last two. It’ll be at the Hotel Lafayette, and while the cost of the ticket is yet to be determined, it's the party of the century. There will be TONS of drinking and dancing and celebrating. There will be an open bar, dinner, lots and lots of dancing with your favorite TSL celebrities, and more! Prepare yourselves and keep that date open!
  3. Speaking of other things, the TSL Winter Indoor League is making its return as well. And before you ask, NO they won’t be restricting rosters and anyone can play with anyone. There WILL be an “OPEN” division and a “REC” division so that D4-D6 teams can join without having to go against the D1 teams that will be filing into the OPEN division. The league will run from January to March again. More details coming soon.
  4. Breakfast Club predictions, playoff edition:
    1. BDSM 44, Messy Jessie’s 30
    2. Special Kay’s 32, Jennacide 20
  5. Best Games Of the Day:
    1. 10:00 - Mountain Dew Me vs 716
    2. 11:00 - DILFS vs Buffalo Vice Retro
    3. 12:00 - Scott Senior’s Starting vs Can’t Touch This
    4. 1:00 - Cobblestone vs Vaspian
    5. 2:00 - Tight Ends in Motion vs Frodo Swaggins
    6. 3:00 - Practice Squad vs Itches And Ohs
  6. 3 teams that really need a win: Itches and Ohs, TMA, Cobblestone
  7. 3 teams that are really good right now: Mountain Dew Me, Cunning Stunts, Not So Sticky
  8. It’s still really sad to hear that Scott Senior hasn’t started a single game of football with the team that’s named after him starting football games.
  9. Next week is the full on playoff write up, arguably my favorite one to write each year. If you have information about your team that I can use for it, please email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. asap.
  10. Last but not least, I know many people feel slighted by their rankings in the “Top WRs” so perhaps we should have a skills competition for you to prove the committee wrong? Put your money where your mouth is.



The road to Social Co-Ed Football Glory is right in front of you all. Go out there and take it.




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