WEEK 4 THOUGHTS, PREDICTIONS, AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 18 September 2026 15:12

Published: Friday, 18 September 2026 15:12

Written by Topper

Hits: 355

It’s crazy to think that after a ridiculously long summer where we painstakingly waited for the start of the Fall season, we’re already staring Week 4 dead in the face. After this week, we end up on the downslope of the season, as October and the start of the Race For Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality will be able to be seen in the distance. This league moves way too fast, which tracks because time flies when you’re having fun or whatever, right? Well, most of us are having fun anyway. The Malones are definitely not having fun this season. Let’s Get Reccked is absolutely not having fun this season. Cobblestone may or may not be having fun this season but it’s always hard to tell because I’m never really sure who’s been here “this season” compared to “just this week”. I’d Rather Be Golfing isn’t having fun this time around and would probably rather be golfing. Blitzed and Confused has been playing true to their namesake, but perhaps they’re kind of having fun? It’s hard to tell. 

Other teams are definitely having super amounts of fun, like the Sticky Bandits, for instance. 3-0, perched on top of D1 for now. Bullet Club is having fun in the “New D2”. Grey Hair is continuing the fun in D3. Not So Sticky and the Thots are having a ball. Victorious Secret are the only team that’s super having fun but lost a game (They’re 3-1). The Raw Milkers are having super amounts of fun. 

Breakfast Club is fun. 

Everyone else is having different levels of fun but fun nonetheless. This is a fun league after all. 

You know what else is fun? Predictions. 

D1

The battle of the unbeatens went to Sticky, who edged Eyes Downtown 28-25 to grab sole possession of the D1 throne for now, but they had to do it against a Bobby-less ED.  Can't Touch This finally got in the win column, and doesn't that feel overdue? I told you 0-2 was a lie.. The Malones, meanwhile, drop to 0-3 and the alarm bells are officially deafening. And the Freeballers came crashing back to Earth in the worst way - Going 0-2 in the doubleheader with losses to the Legends AND Frodo, going from 66-point darlings to a very humbling Saturday. It’s very clearly Buddy Lee’s fault for not showing up. And like we figured, the Legends are rounding into form, so good luck everyone else. .

EYES DOWNTOWN VS THE MALONES (+10) - The Malones are definitely in trouble and it’s hard to imagine that they’ll dig themselves out of it having to play the defending champions. Sometimes teams just have lost seasons, and this might just be their turn. Malones vs Everybody has become Malones vs Themselves. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 17

LEGENDS VS EYES DOWNTOWN (+1) - An absolute world class barnburner could be in store here. The Legends definitely didn’t forget about the 33-16 Week 1 loss, and they very rarely lose to the same team more than once in a season. They learn from their mistakes. LEGENDS BY 2

D2

Bullet Club is looking like the best team in this division after a  2-0 week, with wins over The System and DXYZ, and they're now a perfect 4-0 on the season. BQI keeps pace by handling LGR pretty easily. 

BQI VS THE SYSTEM (+6) - The System may need to work out some kinks sooner rather than later as the preseason favorites are starting to fall behind the other contenders in the division. Kicak usually has them playing a bit better than this. Meanwhile Bridget continues to find her form and settle in as BQI seems locked in. BQI BY 3

THE SYSTEM VS LET'S GET RECCKED (+7) - For as discombobulated as The System feels like they are, LGR just is. It hasn’t been a banner year for this squad and that may just come down to getting the new players more acclimated with Seth. But for now, they’re the wounded zebra by a pack of Lions, and The System are licking their chops. THE SYSTEM BY 12

D3

Darryl Carr QB Superstar did everything he could in the 64 - 42 track meet between Cunning Stunts and Cobblestone, but fell short as the Stunts went 2-0 on the day and suddenly look like a real problem. Grey Hair kept right on rolling, hanging 44 on Practice Squad to stay perfect and atop the division, still not caring, still winning. 

GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS BUFFALO VICE (+14) - GHDC continues running through the division and have the good people of Buffalo Vice in their way next. I’ll be honest, it’s hard to really judge Vice this season. They forfeited, they got a forfeit win, and then they lost to Practice Squad by a point. It’s hard to really figure out who they are this season, and I’m sure it’s frustrating for them too. We’ll learn a lot this week. GREY HAIR - DON’T CARE BY 9

 COBBLESTONE VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+1) -  If that’s the Cobblestone team for realsies, Darryl Carr QB Superstar might be staring down the barrel of his first Darryl Carr QB Superstar QB of the Year award in quite some time at the banquet. B will be there to stand in his way, but right now it doesn’t seem like they’d be able to hang with Darryl’s squad. COBBLESTONE BY 3

CUNNING STUNTS VS MIKE'S DETAILING (+5) - The real answer to “Who are Mike’s Detailing this season?” will show up today as they get the litmus test that is the Stunts. Like Vice, Mike’s D has had a weird season with a forfeit win, a weird 1 point win against the CobbleBallers, and GHDC blew them out. If they Stunts (who are on a roll) walk all over them, there’s going to be a lot of work to do here. If not? D3 just got more interesting. CUNNING STUNTS BY 8

D4

Balls Deep bounced back to knock off the Coochie Monsters 21-14, because in this division there are no easy buckets. Not So Sticky survived an absolute thriller over the PowerPuff Girls, 37-36, to stay perfect and keep themselves atop the standings. The Skeleton Crew got in the win column handling Golfing, and the Tater Thots ground out a gritty 22-18 win over Two Tuddies. D4 is a lot of fun to watch, but probably stressful to play in.

NOT SO STICKY VS SKELETON CREW (+3) - Sticky Lite vs Wanderers Lite. A fun little matchup that almost feels like a spinoff show of sorts. The Crew got on the board with a win over Golfing, but now they get to jump up the standings to play the top team in the division. It’s going to suck for them. NOT SO STICKY BY 14

COOCHIE MONSTERS VS FLYING BALLS (+6) - The Coochie Monsters looked great, and they looked not so great against Balls Deep. They get a Flying Balls team that still has some things to figure out this season themselves, so it’ll come down to which team gets a handle on it sooner. COOCHIE MONSTERS BY 8

GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS BLUE BALLERS (+5) - The Blue Ballers are apparently without their QB for the next few weeks as Phil The Thrill is off getting some sort of super secret Stem Cell injections to make him even more dominant during games. Unfortunately for the Ballers, they get a much better than very good Thots team who is chomping at the bit to get another win. GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS BY 16

SKELETON CREW VS BALLS DEEP (+8) - Balls Deep continues to get no respect from the oddsmakers, but you can see why. They’re 2-2 with a negative 29 point differential. It’s hard to get a true handle on a Bi-Polar team like this, but perhaps they’re on their way to figuring things out completely. BALLS DEEP BY 3

FLYING BALLS VS TWO TUDDIES (+4) - The Flying Balls get the Tud Buds in their second game, and the Tuddies are still a bit of a mystery on who they are this season. By all accounts they looked good against the Thots, and if they play that way here, they should walk away with the win. TWO TUDDIES BY 11

I'D RATHER BE GOLFING VS TWO TUDDIES (+1) - The Tuddies are better than Golfing. Golfing has some real work to do. TWO TUDDIES BY 18

D5

Victorious Secret just put up 70 points with ease against the Wet Bandits, and they are rolling!  But before that, the shocker of the week belonged to the same Wet Bandits, who knocked off TMA 22-16. TMA, the team that beat VS earlier this season. D5 is stupid. In other news, Pit Harade demolished the 716ers by 42, and Room 40 snuck past CFB for their first win. D5 is now the only division where everyone has at least one win and one loss. 

BLITZKRIEG VS COME FROM BEHIND (+4) - Blitzkrieg looks to continue rocking along as they get a CFB team that hasn’t had a great couple of weeks due to some iffy personnel issues. They’re still in the games, so when the team all shows up, look out D5. But for right now BK just feels a bit more stable (which tracks, have you met Molly?). BLITZKRIEG BY 9

TMA VS 716ERS (+10) - The 716ers had quite the rough go at it last week against Pit Harade, and now they get a TMA team that just puked all over themselves in a loss to the Wet Bandits. Usually that means TMA gets it together and takes out their frustrations on their next opponent. TMA BY 7

ROOM 40 VS 716ERS (+1) - Room 40 popped into the win column last week, and they’re looking to keep the good vibes going. The only problem is that they’ll be getting a 716ers team that has been pretty good other than last week’s anomaly. Guessing they lose to TMA is one thing, Room 40 is another. 716ERS BY 8

PIT HARADE VS WET BANDITS (+10) - Pit Harade put up an impressive 48-6 win last week that makes me think the top two teams in D5 wear pink. The Wet Bandits did get the nice win over TMA, but that good karma was decimated by VS later on. I’ll take the hotter team here. PIT HARADE BY 9

D6

Select is officially the hottest team in D6 not named the Raw Milkers with a nice win over Sticky Laces. SBG got their first W and did it emphatically, shutting out Blitzed and Confused 31-0. Blitzed and Confused are struggling pretty hard so far this season but there’s still time. The Bengay Bandits bounced back nicely from their own shutout loss, handling Cat-Tastrophe 28-8.

SELECT VS RAW MILKERS (+1) - BIG GAME ALERT! Select and the Raw Milkers are here to battle for D6 supremacy, as the winner will move into 1st in the division. Well, the Milkers would stay there, but you get it. Both teams are ranked in the Top 10 of the TSL rankings system, and this should be a doozy. Standings chaos reigns. SELECT BY 10

BENGAY BANDITS VS SBG (+4) - Don’t look now but SBG might be waking up. They might be just as good as the BBs. They turn a lot of “mights” into definites this week. SBG BY 3

CAT-TASTROPHE VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+6) - The Trophes have been solid so far and it’s clear that they’ve played football before. Allegedly so have BAC, but you’d be hard pressed to believe it. CAT-TASTROPHE BY 3

IRISH GIANTS VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+15) - And it doesn’t get better for BAC, getting the Irish Giants up next and they’ve been well rested for this game. IRISH GIANTS BY 14

TSC VS THE GODFATHER

LAST WEEK'S RESULTS:

The Godfather: 12-8 SU, 12-8 ATS
The TSC: 8-12 SU, 8-12 ATS

SEASON:

The Godfather: 43-19-1 SU, 38-24-1 ATS
The TSC: 32-30-1 SU, 27-35-1 ATS

THE TSC'S PICKS:

D1
EYES DOWNTOWN VS THE MALONES (+10) -- EYES DOWNTOWN BY 13
LEGENDS VS EYES DOWNTOWN (+1) -- EYES DOWNTOWN BY 2

D2
BQI VS THE SYSTEM (+6) -- BQI BY 9
THE SYSTEM VS LET'S GET RECCKED (+7) -- THE SYSTEM BY 4

D3
GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS BUFFALO VICE (+14) -- GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE BY 17
COBBLESTONE VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+1) -- PRACTICE SQUAD BY 3
CUNNING STUNTS VS MIKE'S DETAILING (+5) -- CUNNING STUNTS BY 7

D4
NOT SO STICKY VS SKELETON CREW (+3) -- NOT SO STICKY BY 5
COOCHIE MONSTERS VS FLYING BALLS (+6) -- COOCHIE MONSTERS BY 3
GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS BLUE BALLERS (+5) -- BLUE BALLERS BY 1
SKELETON CREW VS BALLS DEEP (+8) -- BALLS DEEP BY 2
FLYING BALLS VS TWO TUDDIES (+4) -- FLYING BALLS BY 6
I'D RATHER BE GOLFING VS TWO TUDDIES (+1) -- TWO TUDDIES BY 2

D5
BLITZKRIEG VS COME FROM BEHIND (+4) -- BLITZKRIEG BY 6
TMA VS 716ERS (+10) -- TMA BY 13
ROOM 40 VS 716ERS (+1) -- 716ERS BY 2
PIT HARADE VS WET BANDITS (+10) -- PIT HARADE BY 14

D6
SELECT VS RAW MILKERS (+1) -- SELECT BY 3
BENGAY BANDITS VS SBG (+4) -- BENGAY BANDITS BY 6
CAT-TASTROPHE VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+6) -- CAT-TASTROPHE BY 8
IRISH GIANTS VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+15) -- IRISH GIANTS BY 18

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

Are we going to do anything about the dips in Field 3? While Field 3 might have a few “nuances” to it, it’s not that different than the other fields. If anyone knows someone that wants to roll the fields, let the League Office know

Bullet Club is 4-0 and winning games by a wide margin. Are they the best team in D2? Bullet Club has certainly come out of the gate hot, knocking off everyone in the division besides LGR so far. BQI and PWI can’t wait for another shot at them. As of right now BC is on top of the mountain, but any of those 3 teams could be considered “best”. 

Can't Touch This finally got their first D1 win, do they go on a run? There’s nothing quite like getting the monkey off your back and losing the stress of having to get that “first win” in D1. That should let CTT relax just ever so slightly, which should only propel them to more wins. D1 continues to be loads of fun. 

Cunning Stunts just went 2-0 including a 64-point outburst. Did we underrate them, or is that a D3 mirage? Everyone knows how good the Stunts can be, just sometimes it takes them a second to get going. But once they do (and I believe they have) look out. They’re a collection of some of the most talented women in the league with Joey Batts at QB who is one of the smartest people to ever do it. At least that's what he tells me. 

We've got Legends-Eyes Downtown AND Select-Raw Milkers this week, which one are you circling hardest? Both games are must watch for sure, but right now it feels like Select - Milkers just means more, so that might be the game to pay attention to more. 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

-We’re just about halfway through the season yet somehow we still have three teams with only one game played. Those teams will more than likely factor into the playoff race and shake up  where we THINK we’re headed currently.

-The overrated: Freeballers, The System, Coochie Monsters, Bengay Bandits

-The underrated: Frodo, DXYZ, Practice Squad, Powerpuff Girls, Pit Harade, SBG

-Breakfast Club Predictions:

-Steph Infection 30, Megoonsta’s 27

-D’s Nutz 33, Meagan It Happen 28

-Carly-fornia Dreaming 40, Missydemeanor 31

-Games of the Day: 

10:00 - Raw Milkers vs Select

11:00 - Coochie Monsters vs Flying Balls

12:00 - Balls Deep vs Skeleton Crew

1:00 - BQI vs The System

2:00 - Eyes Downtown vs Legends

3:00 - Cunning Stunts vs Mike’s Detailing

-Sticky Bandits are sitting at 3-0, Not So Sticky is at 3-0, it’s very clear that referees are favoring teams with Jeff Krol on them. Reminds me of the old Topper days. 

-Remaining undefeated teams: 8. Still not sure that anyone will finish the season that way. 

-The Powerpuff Girls are 1-3, but there’s no denying that they’re awesome. They need to stop losing by one point though. Get it together ladies. 

-D3 is weird and hard to get a handle on thanks to the various forfeits and Darryl-ing. Once we get another couple of weeks under our belts, maybe it’ll be easier to figure out. Probably not. 

-The System needs to win against BQI this week to save their season before it starts to spiral out of control. Confidence can be a wonderful thing. 

If you have something to say email me anytime at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.. As you know I do not give out my phone as I live in a log cabin in Des Moines, Iowa and do not get cell service. 

-GF OUT. 

WEEK 2 THOUGHTS, PICKS, AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 04 September 2026 16:29

Published: Friday, 04 September 2026 16:29

Written by Topper

Hits: 395

And we’re off! Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, the Race has begun! After a near perfect Week 1 (not that it was hard to beat the Week 1 last spring) that saw its fair share of thrilling games, beautiful weather, and “it’s good to be back” smiles all over the place, the calendar has turned to September and it’s time to “lock in”. 

It’s true, every season at about this time I get to remind you that the first couple of weeks of any TSL season doesn’t matter. It’s never about how you start, it’s about how you finish. You know the drill by now: it takes a couple of weeks for most of the TSL to get into form. Week 1’s big winners are tomorrow’s “upset in the first round of the playoffs” teams. If your team is brand new, added new players and didn’t practice all summer, is full of players who need to stretch in the morning just to make sure they don’t hurt themselves stretching in the afternoon, chances are you didn’t put your best foot forward last week. So many teams need a few weeks to get on the same page, or work themselves back into “top game shape” that it’s hard to recognize what’s real and what’s not at this point. And let’s not forget the excuses that I’m sure we’ve all heard by now: “Our QB wasn’t there!”, “We were missing our best players!”, “Half of our team forgot the season started last week and didn’t show up!”. You get the idea. 

That’s where I come in. I’ve been watching this league from my log cabin in Des Moines, Iowa for decades. I have a talent to sniff out what’s real and what’s not at the start of the season. 

WHAT’S SUPER REAL: 

-Buddy Lee. He rolled out of bed on Saturday morning, smoked The Malones like it was nothing (hanging 66 points on them in the process), and then casually went 2-0 with PWI without even really trying. He might not be the overall best QB in the league, but he’s on his way. 

-Eyes Downtown heading to the D1 championship game. I’m not ready to crown them champions, but they barely broke a sweat handling the Legends in Week 1, and they’re only going to get better. 

-Darryl’s Roster. Right? They have to be. 

-The Blue Ballers. They’re just going to do that thing they’ve done every season so far. Win. 

-Grey Hair Don’t Care is going to waltz away with an easy D3 title win, because all of the other top teams went to D2. 

-Speaking of, D2 is going to be a weekly firefight no matter who is on the field. 

-Victorious Secret might’ve thrown a damn near perfect game in D5 last week, but that is more than likely going to be the norm going forward. Jeff Krol can see the torches and pitchforks heading his way in the distance already. 

-New teams? No problem. Cat-astrophe and the Bengay Bandits get off to fantastic starts, expect them to be there at the end of the season too. 

WHAT’S KIND OF MAYBE REAL:

-Casual reminder that BQI are only two seasons removed from losing in the D5 playoffs. Being 0-2 isn’t a complete surprise, so maybe let’s pump the brakes on the “they’re WAY too good for D2” whining. 

-The Flying Balls might be back up to their old tricks. 

-The Sticky Laces are cursed by some old gypsy woman that now binds them to only playing one point games. This is Kyle’s fault. 

-Fall Blitzkrieg might not be as good as Spring Blitzkrieg anymore? 

WHAT’S SUPER DUPER MEGA NO WAY NOT REAL:

-The Legends aren’t dead, they just don’t care yet. Jaded from winning so much for the last decade I guess. 

-Darryl’s roster. Right? 

-Thinking that B or the Stunts are just going to let Grey Hair walk away with a title. 

-That Buddy Lee won’t throw for PWI all season. Over/Under “T-Time” games this season is currently at 1.5. 

That about covers it. 

At the end of the day, anything that happened so far doesn’t mean a thing. So tell your hyperactive dude bro blowing up the group chat to chill. This is Week 2, a brand new week, and a brand new opportunity to change your team’s narrative. 

For better or for worse. 

D1

LAST WEEK'S GAMES

STICKY BANDITS 48, CAN'T TOUCH THIS 43
FREEBALLERS 66, THE MALONES 28
EYES DOWNTOWN 33, LEGENDS 16

Well, D1 wasted no time reminding us why it's the top division. Can't Touch This showed up to their D1 debut and went toe-to-toe with Sticky in a 91-point slugfest, and just like Rocky Balboa, they too lost to Apollo Creed, but they sure earned some respect. They'll be just fine in D1. Eyes Downtown, meanwhile, look every bit like the champs, handling the Legends in a way that has to make the rest of the division a little nervous. But the game everyone's still talking about? The Freeballers dropping SIXTY-SIX on the Malones. Don’t get me wrong, The Malones world beaters on defense to begin with, but if that's the real Freeballers, D1 just got a whole lot more interesting. And if you're the Malones, giving up 66 has to sting in a way no amount of "it's Week 1" can fully explain away.

EYES DOWNTOWN VS FRODO SWAGGINS (+7) - The best thing that could happen to the TSL would be Frodo Swaggins walking in a week late to the party, and punching the champs in the mouth. It would instantaneously make D1 an “anyone can win this division" division. But Eyes Downtown looked so damn good last week. Frodo keeps them on their toes but blinks first at the end. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 4

STICKY BANDITS VS THE MALONES (+10) - The Malones sitting at 10 point underdogs feels soooo 2023. But with rumored QB issues, and the defense they ordered still stuck in transit somewhere near Toledo, the reality is that they are very very not back. Sticky calmly outlasted Can’t Touch This last week, and somehow out of the 7 teams in D1, they’re making the least amount of noise. Just how they like it. STICKY BANDITS BY 12

FREEBALLERS VS FRODO SWAGGINS (+4) - It’s apparent that when Garrett walked into Jeff Krol’s office at TSL HQ to request off from his position of Referee Wrangler for Week 1 for his darkness retreat, Mr. Krol smiled, approved the request, and then because he can see the future, scheduled Garrett in a doubleheader against the hottest two teams in the division. Nobody announced their arrival louder than the Freeballers did last weekend, and now it’s on them to prove it wasn’t a fluke. Unlike the Freeballers teams of the past, this one will actually do it. FREEBALLERS BY 10

CAN'T TOUCH THIS VS LEGENDS (+1) - Sometimes the odds maker just makes me laugh. I get it, the Legends looked unlegendary last week while CTT looked like they belonged in D1 (which everyone in the TSL except them has known for a minute now). But to make them slight favorites is a little too much until they earn it. I’d wager my hard earned Topper Bucks on the Legends here. Either I'm getting points with the 2nd best team of all time, or I’m getting some fantastic “WE SHOWED YOU” emails from CTT. LEGENDS BY 8

D2

LAST WEEK'S GAMES

BULLET CLUB 35, BQI 25
PWI 45, LET'S GET RECCKED 28
PWI 48, BQI 46
THE SYSTEM 29, D-GENERATION X Y AND Z 15

The "new" D2 came out swinging, and the early headline is fairly easy. PWI IS BACK! Two games, two wins, including a nailbiter over BQI that told us everything we needed to know about how quickly this team would be able to shake the rust off. Speaking of BQI, an 0-2 start was not on the bingo card for them, but that's the thing about this D2: everybody can play, and there are no nights off. The good news for them (incoming theme of the article) is there's a lot of football left and the offense clearly has juice. The System looked the part in a comfortable win over the Kellers, and they’re only going up from here.  

PWI VS BULLET CLUB (+2) - Two old rivals meet again for the first time in a while. Both teams looked good against BQI, but in different ways. PWI couldn’t stop scoring (or allowing points) while Bullet Club really played well defensively overall, while not being too shabby on offense. I tend to lean towards the better defensive team getting an extra stop or two in these situations.  BULLET CLUB BY 1

LET'S GET RECCKED VS D-GENERATION X Y AND Z (+1) -  It wasn’t quite a storybook beginning in D2 for LGR, but with the new players they added it makes sense that it’ll take a minute for them to really gel. That’s not a problem for DXYZ, however. If Damian can channel his grandfather’s amazing QB skills that are still laying dormant inside of him, DXYZ could really go places. D-GENERATION X Y AND Z BY 3

THE SYSTEM VS BQI (+7) - One bad week does not a season make. BQI’s 0-2 start is a top TSL headline, but that’s only because of how it caught the public off guard. What matters the most is that BQI improved in their second game, and they’re going to be even better this week. The System was in cruise control for most of week 1, but they’re going to “get up” for this one and they’re not going to make it easy on Bridget whatsoever. Last year’s loss still sits in their memories. This week’s loss is really going to bug them too. BQI BY 8

D3

LAST WEEK'S GAMES

GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE 41, CUNNING STUNTS 27
BUFFALO VICE 21, COBBLESTONE 0 (FORFEIT)
GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE 42, MIKE'S DETAILING 24

I said Grey Hair - Don't Care would win this division and they spent Week 1 making me look like a genius, going 2-0 and taking care of both the Cunning Stunts AND Mike's Detailing in the process. That's about as good a start as you could ask for. The Stunts and MD both had their moments but couldn't close, which is going to be the D3 story all year in this reshuffled bunch. And then there's Cobblestone. Darryl's mystery roster of ringers was so mysterious that it didn't actually show up, handing Buffalo Vice a free 21-0 W. I said I'd believe it when I saw it, and well, I still haven't seen it. Vice, for their part, will take the easy win and the return to a division where they can breathe a little easier after a rough season last season.

BUFFALO VICE VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+1) - Buffalo Vice is back to their winning ways in their return to D3. Both of these teams should have a chip on their shoulders to some degree. Yeah, Vice didn’t have the best of seasons last season, but that doesn’t mean they weren’t just playing in a tougher division and things should be “easier” (for lack of a better term) for them. And the Squad might not have Kenny to save them anymore, but they still have a crotchedy old rocket armed QB who has never met a slight he didn’t turn into motivation. Not to mention the rest of the talent on the roster (Hi Renee!) still exists. Yet both teams feel like D3 afterthoughts. Not for long. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 4

COBBLESTONE VS MIKE'S DETAILING (+1) - MIKE’S DETAILING REVENGE GAME! Maybe. If Cobblestone shows up. Cobblestone knocked MD out of the D4 playoffs in an upset last season, and now both teams are up in D3 to rekindle the budding rivalry. I know that Darryl Carr QB Superstar is sitting on an amazing team, and he’s going to prove the doubters wrong this week. COBBLESTONE BY 8

D4

LAST WEEK'S GAMES

BLUE BALLERS 45, BALLS DEEP 25
POWERPUFF GIRLS 39, I'D RATHER BE GOLFING 20
NOT SO STICKY 36, I'D RATHER BE GOLFING 25
FLYING BALLS 38, SKELETON CREW 35
GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS 43, POWERPUFF GIRLS 23

The champ-vs-champ opener was a little anti-climatic,  with the Blue Ballers reminding everybody that back-to-back titles weren't a fluke, handling the reigning D4 champs in Balls Deep. The Tater Thots came back to the fall session and immediately dropped 43 on the PPG, because of course they did. Poor I'd Rather Be Golfing drew a double-header from hell and went home 0-2 through no real fault of their own, losing to the PowerPuffs and to Not So Sticky. And give it up for the Flying Balls, who edged the Skeleton Crew in a fun one to kick off both teams’ new QB eras.  

BLUE BALLERS VS COOCHIE MONSTERS (+8) - When we last left the Coochie Monsters, they were among the front runners for the D4 title and then everything went sideways. Their welcome back present? The freight train known as the Blue Ballers. There are absolutely better ways to start a season. It’ll get better for the Coochies. BLUE BALLERS BY 18

NOT SO STICKY VS BALLS DEEP (+14) - Balls Deep might be the first team in TSL history to win a championship, stay in their division, and end up as double digit underdogs within a week. I don’t love this line, and I’d take the points regardless, as Not So Sticky doesn’t usually light up the scoreboard, they just do what they need to to win. NSS controlled their game with IRBG last week, and expect more of the same here. NOT SO STICKY BY 7

POWERPUFF GIRLS VS BALLS DEEP (+11) - I want to be clear, Balls Deep is a good team. They’re smart, athletic, and they possess some legitimately underrated females in the TSL that if Rameer were alive today, he’d already be in their DMs trying to steal them away for his next D1 team that fails. But they’re not the PowerPuff Girls. The PPGs are working towards full strength, and for anyone who forgot, they’re absolute killers when they get there. And they’re getting there. POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 10

D5

LAST WEEK'S GAMES

VICTORIOUS SECRET 59, PIT HARADE 18
TMA 32, ROOM 40 22
COME FROM BEHIND 30, WET BANDITS 14
716ERS 28, BLITZKRIEG 20

I told you Fall Blitzkrieg is a different animal, as the 716ers knocked them off their pedestal right away, which was surprising. Victorious Secret announced themselves to D5 by hanging 59 points on Pit Harade, which is exactly the kind of thing that will make lesser teams start to whine more. TMA slid up from D6 and looked comfortable against Room 40, and CFB did CFB things, grinding out a win over the Wet Bandits. 

BLITZKRIEG VS ROOM 40 (+7) - Blitzkrieg may have just had an off week last Saturday, and if that’s the case, we’ll find out here. BK had next to no problem with Room 40 last season, and if they struggle here, then it’s time for concern. As for Room 40 right now, it’s “new name, same concerns”. Let’s see how they look this week. BLITZKRIEG BY 12

TMA VS BLITZKRIEG (+5) -  BK then gets an immediate test in the D6 defending champs, TMA. This one should be a good one, as TMA seems to have picked up right where they left off last season. TMA BY 4

COME FROM BEHIND VS PIT HARADE (+10) - Come From Behind had a lot of things go their way last weekend, while Pit Harade was more of the opposite. Pairing FA signing Garrett with former MVP Quentin Holliday could be the cure to what ailed PH not just last week, but last season as well. CFB continues to just get the job done no matter who they have on the field. This should be a good test for both teams. COME FROM BEHIND BY 3

VICTORIOUS SECRET VS TMA (+3) - Victorious Secret could not be stopped last week, which had to give Jordan that old familiar feeling he had in the minors when anything he did turned to gold. TMA should provide a much stiffer test for them, and TMA knows how to use their ladies to keep pace with the gender teams. TMA gives them a run for their money but ultimately falls short. VICTORIOUS SECRET BY 13

VICTORIOUS SECRET VS 716ERS (+8) - The 716ers made a BIG statement last week, smacking Blitzkrieg around and announcing themselves as contenders for the title. If they truly are title material, this will be the game where they find out. They haven’t played a gender team yet (I don’t think), and there is definitely an adjustment period for that. I’m not sure how good the 716ers ladies are, but they better be on top of their game or else. VICTORIOUS SECRET BY 17

D6

LAST WEEK'S GAMES

IRISH GIANTS 39, SELECT 36
BENGAY BANDITS 45, BLITZED AND CONFUSED 6
CAT-TASTROPHE 24, STICKY LACES 23

The preseason favorites in the Irish Giants got the job done against a Select team that, as always, plays a close game. But the real story of D6 are the new kids on the block: The Bengay Bandits brutalized BnC, while Cat-Tastrophe snuck out a 1 point nailbiter over the Sticky Laces! Let’s Go Trophes! 

CAT-TASTROPHE VS RAW MILKERS (+3) -  The Trophes came into the TSL and immediately made their mark with a one point win against a solid Sticky Laces team. Up next for them are the Raw Milkers, a very solid team in their own right. The Milkers have been teetering on the edge of glory for a couple of seasons now, and they’re LONG overdue to have that breakout season. Now is the time. RAW MILKERS BY 3

RAW MILKERS VS SBG (+9) - Following up with that theme, the Milkers are cruising into a double header, but they get SBG, a team that got so shook in D5 last season, half of the team lost the love of the game and retired from sports as a whole midseason. At least that’s what I was told. But they’re back, they’re in D6, and they’re looking to get after it. It’s just hard to back them right now. RAW MILKERS BY 9

STICKY LACES VS SBG (+12) - To make matters worse for SBG, they get a doubleheader against a Sticky Laces team that’s already been taken by surprise by a team they underestimated. They won’t make the mistake again. I think.  STICKY LACES BY 12

BENGAY BANDITS VS SELECT (+9) - The Bengay Bandits are either the superstars of D6, or they got to play a team that literally was Blitzed and Confused last week. I’d like to think that type of dominance was more of a fluke, and we’ll get a better judgment of how good they are this week against a Select team that gave the Irish Giants a hell of a game last season.  SELECT BY 1

TSC VS THE GODFATHER

LAST WEEK'S RESULTS:

The Godfather: 17-5 SU, 15-6-1 ATS
The TSC: 13-9 SU, 11-10-1 ATS

The Man once again asserts his dominance over The Machine. For now. 

THE TSC'S PICKS:

D1
EYES DOWNTOWN VS FRODO SWAGGINS (+7) -- EYES DOWNTOWN BY 4
STICKY BANDITS VS THE MALONES (+10) -- THE MALONES BY 1
FREEBALLERS VS FRODO SWAGGINS (+4) -- FREEBALLERS BY 6
CAN'T TOUCH THIS VS LEGENDS (+1) -- CAN'T TOUCH THIS BY 3

D2
PWI VS BULLET CLUB (+2) -- PWI BY 4
LET'S GET RECCKED VS D-GENERATION X Y AND Z (+1) -- D-GENERATION X Y AND Z BY 2
THE SYSTEM VS BQI (+7) -- BQI BY 1

D3
BUFFALO VICE VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+1) -- PRACTICE SQUAD BY 2
COBBLESTONE VS MIKE'S DETAILING (+1) -- MIKE'S DETAILING BY 8

D4
BLUE BALLERS VS COOCHIE MONSTERS (+8) -- BLUE BALLERS BY 5
NOT SO STICKY VS BALLS DEEP (+14) -- NOT SO STICKY BY 12
POWERPUFF GIRLS VS BALLS DEEP (+11) -- POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 6

D5
BLITZKRIEG VS ROOM 40 (+7) -- BLITZKRIEG BY 9
TMA VS BLITZKRIEG (+5) -- TMA BY 2
COME FROM BEHIND VS PIT HARADE (+10) -- COME FROM BEHIND BY 7
VICTORIOUS SECRET VS TMA (+3) -- VICTORIOUS SECRET BY 1
VICTORIOUS SECRET VS 716ERS (+8) -- VICTORIOUS SECRET BY 10

D6
CAT-TASTROPHE VS RAW MILKERS (+3) -- RAW MILKERS BY 1
RAW MILKERS VS SBG (+9) -- RAW MILKERS BY 11
STICKY LACES VS SBG (+12) -- STICKY LACES BY 14
BENGAY BANDITS VS SELECT (+9) -- BENGAY BANDITS BY 6

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

• The Freeballers hung 66 on the Malones in an impressive win. Is that a genuine sign that this is finally their year, or just a fact you’ll be using in your playoff article on why the 2-6 Freeballers COULD MAYBE UPSET their first round opponent? You know how rebuilding teams in the major sports leagues slowly add an impact player or two every season and before you know it, they’re just in the favorites section? I think the Freeballers have finally added enough impact pieces that it’s time for them to cash in. I don’t know what a Jurrien Mitchell is, but word is he may be the best player in the TSL already. If Buddy Lee can find him open more than a few times a game, 66 points might not be an impressive outlier, it might be the norm. 

• BQI opened 0-2 as a preseason co-favorite. Is it panic time in that camp yet, or is the offense good enough that they climb right back into the D2 race? The entire theme of this article is that one week does not make a season. BQI has two people on that roster who are crazy and obsessed with winning and they hate to lose: Bobby and Girl Bobby. If you think they didn’t have 3 practices this week, even in those torrential downpours, you’re the crazy one. 

• Both brand-new D6 teams that won (Bengay Bandits and Cat-Tastrophe) looked way better than a first-week roster should. Which one do you actually believe in going forward? Can the answer be both? Both wins were impressive regardless of how you look at it. Sure, the teams had players on them who’ve played in the league before, so they weren’t COMPLETELY brand new, but they looked like they belonged, and that’s what matters. 

• We've got a loaded D1 slate this week with Sticky-Malones, Frodo-Eyes Downtown, Frodo-Freeballers, and CTT-Legends on the schedule, but every D1 game should be must-see TV. Which Week 2 matchup across the rest of the league are you most excited for? There are so many good matchups this week, at least on paper. There’s a reason to be interested in every single game, which is rare. I’m going to cheat and give you two: TMA vs Victorious Secret, and the Blue Ballers vs Coochie Monsters. I have to go before I change my mind. 

• Last but not least, we see the return of Fall Breakfast Club! The season starts this week, who do you have winning it all? It’s still fantastic to see that the TSL Universe willed this to happen. After being sent the rosters, it’s very, very hard to pick against Steph Infection. Plus, Steph is kind of due to win again anyway. They win over Carly-fornia Dreaming. 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

• There have been more than enough complaints from people about “teams being too good for this division or that division”. It’s not as though there’s an exact science to this. Topper and Lenny used to debate for weeks about who should go where, and naturally, you’re going to get something wrong. This league has seen more than its fair share of “super good teams way too good for their division” not win it all. Play the games. 

• GAMES OF THE DAY: 

• 10:00am - Bullet Club vs PWI

• 11:00am - Freeballers vs Frodo Swaggins

• 12:00pm - Blue Ballers vs Coochie Monsters

• 1:00pm - TMA vs Victorious Secret

• 2:00pm - BQI vs The System

• 3:00pm - Balls Deep vs PowerPuff Girls

• BREAKFAST CLUB PREDICTIONS:

• Steph Infection 33, D’s Nutz 20

• Missydemeanor 37, Meagan It Happen 27

• Carly-fornia Dreaming 28, Megoonsta’s 26

• I was told that next Saturday, 9/12,  around 4:30 after the games is when Garrett Beesing is hosting his annual Blind Draw Dart Tournament at the bar if you’re interested! Reach out to Garrett if you’d like to partake! 

• It’s looking like another gorgeous day for football: 74 degrees and Partly Sunny. Enjoy it while it lasts there in Buffalo, it could snow by next week. 

• We’re getting to the point again where the TSL is overflowing with talented females in every single division. The last time this happened, we ended up with 4 gender teams playing at once, to the point where the league had to consider making one specific hour per week where only the gender teams played. We’re already up to three (Stunts, PowerPuffs, and Secret) and we could easily roster a 4th. I wonder who could be up to the task? 

• Remember, don’t bring outside alcohol to the fields, and also the Rose Garden once again has bar specials for Week 2!

• If you’re reading this on the website, check out our other fun media/articles: 

-The TSL QB Power Rankings, our look into the top QBs in the league this season ranked by a group of long time TSLers! 

-The TSC, a rogue AI that Topper created on a wine bender that now watches the fields, trying to understand what the TSL is, and discovering what teams are good or bad. It also picks the games (as you can see above). 

-The Lenny Alba Variety Hour, a brand new TSL article that is written by YOU, the TSL universe. If you want to write something about the league that you’d like to say, this is your spot. Consider it like a Voice of the League type article that can literally be about anything you want to get off your chest or look into. ANYONE can do it, and if we get more than one article a week, we’ll just post them all. The more the merrier.

-The TSL Podcast, our weekly podcast that has been running strong for nearly a decade. Joe K, Dorene, Tino, and whatever TSL guests they can acquire as they talk about the current events going on in the TSL Universe and discuss the players and games!  You can listen to it on the website (at the bottom of the page) or on Spotify. They’re always looking for new guests, so reach out to Jeff Krol or any of the hosts asap! 

• You have to wonder if the real reason Darryl didn’t submit a roster last week was because he was smartly waiting for NFL cutdown day that came a day after we played our first games. Now that he’s had his pick of the litter from those players, he should be showing up with the Monstars. 

• There’s nothing like the feeling of hearing a happy Jeff Krol on the other end of the phone letting me know that the day went relatively smoothly, without anything too crazy happening. Week 1 always seemed to have fireworks in one way or another the last few seasons, so getting through it unscathed is a win in itself. 

Pay your referees, get there on time, and have fun. 

-GF OUT

WEEK 3 THOUGHTS, PICKS, MUSINGS, and STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 11 September 2026 14:46

Published: Friday, 11 September 2026 14:46

Written by Topper

Hits: 356

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, we’re on to Week 3. Week 3 is the magical time in every TSL season where things really start to get good. It’s where the rust has fallen off, most teams have played multiple games already, (except for the Two Tuddies, who apparently are still in hiding after last season’s ‘We should be in D3’ debacle and haven’t played a game since. Word is that Chris is still wearing shirts to stay off the radar. They’re allegedly showing up this Saturday.), and after this week, we’ll be starting to see exactly who these teams are going to be for the rest of the season.  

That isn’t to say that the first two weeks haven’t been good. Just under half of the games (21 of the 45 played) in the TSL Fall 2026 season have been decided by “one score”, which for us means within 10 points (8 for a Gender TD + 2 point conversion). 17 of those 21 games were within six points. 9 of those games were decided by a conversion (1 or 2 points) or ties. So far you have had a 1 in 5 chance to see a classic. That’s a lot of exciting action for those two weeks, including last week that saw Practice Squad return to the TSL with a win over Vice, Frodo tied the Freeballers on the last play of the game, Bullet Club beat PWI on the last play of the game, Mike’s Detailing beat Cobblestone by 1, Pit Harade beat CFB on the last play of the game, and Balls Deep slid by the Powerpuff Girls by a point as well. 

I think it’s safe to say that things have been their usual chaos already, and it’s only going to get better now as teams settle in more and more. The six TSL divisions all look to have multiple potential champions (except for maybe Grey Hair running away with D3, but I can’t imagine the other teams won’t have something to say about it), D1 has six teams that can win it and The Malones (who are without their QB, so it might be a lost season for them). D2 only has one undefeated team left already (Bullet Club), but any of these teams can win the whole thing and I wouldn’t be surprised. D4 is looking at an early 5 team race but teams 6 and 7? Powerpuff and Balls Deep. We don’t know what the Tuddies will be, Skeleton Crew only lost by 3, and Golfing can easily turn things around. In D5, every team already has a loss which is a good indicator of an even division. Wet Bandits and Room 40 haven’t hit the win column yet, but they’re going to. In D6, everyone has a win except for the brand new BnC who only played once in Week 1 so far, and SBG but that’s normal. 

I can’t remember a time recently when every division seemed this even. The fun part from here is watching it all play out. There are going to be teams that separate themselves from the pack as favorites, and others that end up falling behind the rest of the division. And of course there will be some that look great on paper but they ended up getting lucky as the season played on (being on the right side of a ref call, playing a good team the week they’re missing a top player, weather related things, etc) while there will be teams that end up with a bad record that could’ve easily been a 2 loss team during the season that will pull off the playoff “upset”. 

The only question left is: which one are you? 

You have six weeks to figure that out. 

D1

LAST WEEK'S GAMES

EYES DOWNTOWN 29, FRODO SWAGGINS 24
STICKY BANDITS 41, THE MALONES 18
FREEBALLERS 37, FRODO SWAGGINS 37 (TIE)
LEGENDS 47, CAN'T TOUCH THIS 43

Eyes Downtown survived a feisty Frodo squad to stay a perfect 2-0, and Sticky quietly did the same, dismantling the Malones to sit atop the division alongside them without anyone paying them much mind. Just how they like it. But the two headliners? First, the Legends woke up and reminded everyone why you never bury them, edging Can't Touch This in a classic to drop CTT to 0-2, which is simply misleading about how good that team actually is. And then there's the Freeballers, who couldn't quite finish the job against Frodo, settling for a 37-37 tie that keeps them unbeaten but leaves you wanting a little more after the Week 1 fireworks. Which team are they?  Frodo, for their part, might be the most dangerous 0-1-1 team you'll ever see, considering they went toe to toe with ED and the Freeballers and are two plays away from being 2-0.

 STICKY BANDITS VS EYES DOWNTOWN (+2) - Somehow Sticky comes into the game favored, which feels like a slap in the face to the champs. A battle of the two 2-0 teams in D1 where the winner will be in the driver’s seat for the all important playoff bye week. Both teams have survived some good opponents so far, but right now it’s hard to pick against ED. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 3

CAN'T TOUCH THIS VS THE MALONES (+10) - This meeting of former D2 foes might have lost its luster a little bit, but if CTT thinks they can sleep on The Malones and finally get that first win in D1 just because they looked good against Sticky and the Legends, they have another thing coming. If CTT doesn’t bring the usual fire they’ve had, they could let this game slip. I expect them to already know that though. CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 14

FREEBALLERS VS LEGENDS (+8) - On the one hand, The Freeballers looked unbeatable Week 1. On the other hand, it was against a weaker version of The Malones. Then they tied a very good Frodo team. Perhaps the brakes need to be pumped. If the Freeballers are actually ascending into D1 title contender status, this is the game where they get to prove it. Unfortunately for them, the Legends tend to get up for games where upstarts think they’re going to make a name for themselves. LEGENDS BY 9

FREEBALLERS VS FRODO SWAGGINS (+3) - And just like that we get a rematch of the tie from last week. Freeballers end up on the second half of a double header, while Frodo remains focused on fixing the mistakes that cost them a win against the Freeballers a week ago. FRODO SWAGGINS BY 2

D2

LAST WEEK'S GAMES

BULLET CLUB 33, PWI 32
D-GENERATION X Y AND Z 44, LET'S GET RECCKED 28
BQI 34, THE SYSTEM 16

I didn’t have Bullet Club to be D2’s last remaining undefeated team, but they’ve earned it on both sides of the ball.  They knocked off PWI 33-32 to move to 2-0 with an exciting win on the last play. BQI shook off the 0-2 start and throttled The System 34-16, reminding everyone who they are. And DXYZ quietly handled LGR to remind us they aren't going anywhere. D2 will remain a slugfest from here on out. 

BULLET CLUB VS THE SYSTEM (+1) - Bullet Club and The System (ILF/ISH) have had some battles in the past and this game should be no different. These teams match up pretty well, which usually means something crazy should happen. Coin flip game. THE SYSTEM BY 3

BULLET CLUB VS D-GENERATION X Y AND Z (+6) - These two teams know each other pretty well, but BC has been operating a slightly higher level. Should be a fun chess match between two longtime rivals. BULLET CLUB BY 4

 
BQI VS LET'S GET RECCKED (+11) - Let’s Get Reccked isn’t exactly having the season they anticipated when they jumped up to D2, and while winning cures all, the feel good wins are going to be very tough to come by here. BQI settled down after a rocky Week 1, and showed everyone just why they’re division favorites. Both trends should continue. BQI BY 12

D3

LAST WEEK'S GAMES

PRACTICE SQUAD 34, BUFFALO VICE 33
MIKE'S DETAILING 21, COBBLESTONE 20

Two games, two 1 point battles. Welcome to D3, where nothing is ever easy and everything comes down to the last possession. Practice Squad's crotchety rocket-armed QB found a way to edge Buffalo Vice 34-33, getting the Squad to a good start to the year. And Cobblestone showed up and didn’t forfeit, sort of, before falling to Mike's Detailing by a single point, 21-20. 

MIKE'S DETAILING VS BUFFALO VICE (+5) - A really nice “measuring stick” game for both teams, as both of them find themselves a little “middle of the pack-y” in D3 for now. Both have ‘wins’ over Cobblestone, so both teams would very much like to put a win on the board that means a little more. BUFFALO VICE BY 2

PRACTICE SQUAD VS CUNNING STUNTS (+2) - Practice Squad has struggled with the ladies in the past, but B’s new additions always seem to come to play each year. Don’t forget that PS has changed a little bit in the last few seasons and they’re still dialing it in somewhat. The Stunts are the Stunts, they’re incredibly talented, and if you don’t bring your A-game against the girls, you’re in trouble. CUNNING STUNTS BY 8

 
GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+10) - B was on the the TSL podcast this week, and I heard him get fired up about Grey Hair being crowned D3 champions already. They’re very, very good. That isn’t up for debate. Getting a fired up B is almost as good as “Playoff B” though. This game will be good. However…GREY HAIR DON’T CARE BY 7

COBBLESTONE VS CUNNING STUNTS (+1) - I don’t know who Cobblestone will bring this week. I do know who the Stunts will bring this week. CUNNING STUNTS BY 10

D4

LAST WEEK'S GAMES

COOCHIE MONSTERS 33, BLUE BALLERS 20
NOT SO STICKY 29, BALLS DEEP 12
BALLS DEEP 26, POWERPUFF GIRLS 25

Chaos reigns in D4. The Blue Ballers' little streak came to an end as the Coochie Monsters looked good to go this season, and won 33-20. Not So Sticky moved to 2-0 after taking out Balls Deep. Balls Deep then decided to turn around and take out the PPGs to go 1-1 on the day and they can breathe a little easier now. 

COOCHIE MONSTERS VS BALLS DEEP (+7) - The Coochies came in and dismantled the Blue Ballers in a way not too many teams have before, which has to put the division on notice. Up next for them are the defending champs, and you know they want to show up big for this one too. Balls Deep improved a little last week, but I’m not sure it’s enough. If they want to prove their title wasn’t a fluke last season, here’s their chance. COOCHIE MONSTERS BY 2

SKELETON CREW VS I'D RATHER BE GOLFING (+1) - Two teams finding their way in the division meet up early in the season to get on track. Both teams had a week off last week, so they should be refreshed as they head into battle this Saturday. SKELETON CREW BY 8

GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS TWO TUDDIES (+6) - The GVTT have all of one game under their belts this year, while we’ll be seeing the Tud Buds for the first time. This game has all the makings of a classic, and while the Tuddies dropped a division, that doesn’t make them not dangerous. The Tuddies show up, and they add another team into the D4 title conversation. TWO TUDDIES BY 9

NOT SO STICKY VS POWERPUFF GIRLS (+6) - Not So Sticky seems to have the right mix of players and vibes this season, and historically when they nail that, they’re very hard to beat. Enter a PPG team that is very hard to beat on their own, but right now their vibes are slightly off. Perhaps this is the game that fixes it? I don’t think so. NOT SO STICKY BY 4

BLUE BALLERS VS FLYING BALLS (+7) - More and more Balls in this division as the Flying ones take on the Blue ones. The Blue Ballers were handed a loss last week, which is the worst thing to happen for the Flying Balls. It caused the Blue Ballers to refocus and now the Flying Balls can’t catch them sleeping. And maybe they’d rather have it that way. They’re 1-0 after an impressive Week 1 win, and they have a bit of momentum of their own. Having that week off already gives me pause though. BLUE BALLERS BY 6

D5

LAST WEEK'S GAMES

BLITZKRIEG 43, ROOM 40 26
BLITZKRIEG 15, TMA 12
TMA 22, VICTORIOUS SECRET 17
PIT HARADE 36, COME FROM BEHIND 34
VICTORIOUS SECRET 27, 716ERS 23

Blitzkrieg answered any doubters last week by going 2-0 against Room 40 and TMA thanks to the return of Light Red Hoodie Guy. LRHG was the most “texted to me Saturday by so many people” thing that happened last week.  TMA rebounded from that loss to snag a win from Victorious Secret, who then bounced back to beat the 716ers. And Pit Harade landed a nice 36-34 win over CFB to get them on the board this season.

716ERS VS PIT HARADE (+12) - The 716ers followed up their nice win over Blitzkrieg with a loss to Victorious Secret last week. In other words, they’re still figuring out exactly who they are. If they’re going to be contenders, they should take care of business against Pit Harade. Conversely, if Pit Harade is to ascend to contender status in D5 this season, this is a good starting point. 716ERS BY 8

TMA VS WET BANDITS (+14) - The Wet Bandits have a tough doubleheader this week, and they kick it off against a TMA team that looks right at home here in D5. TMA has played a pretty tough schedule early on, already getting in their games against Secret and Blitzkrieg. Hanging out 2-1 atop the standings with those two teams is right where they expected to be. The Wet Bandits got better as the season went along last spring, but seeing improvements this year might be difficult, as the schedule did them no favors this week. TMA BY 17

VICTORIOUS SECRET VS WET BANDITS (+15) - The same as above, but now the Wet Bandits get the added bonus of playing against a highly talented gender team. VICTORIOUS SECRET BY 20

COME FROM BEHIND VS ROOM 40 (+10) - Come From Behind took a narrow loss from Pit Harade last week, but there’s currently no better way to fix what ails you in D5 than a game against Room 40. Room 40 is getting better results overall this season, it’s just not showing on the scoreboard just yet. Their time will come, it just might take a little longer. COME FROM BEHIND BY 7

D6

RAW MILKERS 39, CAT-TASTROPHE 22

RAW MILKERS 43, SBG 28

STICKY LACES 32, SBG 24

SELECT 48, BENGAY BANDITS 0 

The Raw Milkers immediately staked their claim to “most improved for Fall 2026”,  going 2-0 on the day and taking sole possession of first place D6 after taking out the Trophes and SBG. SBG would drop to 0-2 on the season following a close loss to the Sticky Laces, who got themselves the first win of the young season.  Meanwhile, both Select and the Bengay Bandits gave their fans whiplash, As the Bandits followed up a huge Week 1 win with a crushing Week 2 defeat. Select, meanwhile could do no wrong this week, and is it a sign of things to come? 

 SBG VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+1) - One of these teams have to get in the win column, right? I suppose they could tie, but as of right now SBG looked much improved from a season ago, and put up some points last week. They’re trending in the right direction. SBG BY 3

BENGAY BANDITS VS CAT-TASTROPHE (+1) - I have no idea what is going on here. The BBs gave us two completely opposite results so far. The Trophes are a bit more consistent so far in this battle of new squads, so I’ll go with them. CAT-TASTROPHE BY 1

SELECT VS STICKY LACES (+8) - These two teams have played each other for a couple of seasons. As of now, Select looks to be improving on both sides of the ball and they’re looking very contender-y. They’re the hotter team. SELECT BY 13

TSC VS THE GODFATHER

LAST WEEK'S RESULTS:

The Godfather: 14-6-1 SU, 11-10 ATS
The TSC: 11-9-1 SU, 8-13 ATS

SEASON:

The Godfather: 31-11-1 SU, 26-16-1 ATS
The TSC: 24-18-1 SU, 19-23-1 ATS

THE TSC'S WEEK 3 PICKS:

D1
STICKY BANDITS VS EYES DOWNTOWN (+2) -- EYES DOWNTOWN BY 1
CAN'T TOUCH THIS VS THE MALONES (+10) -- CAN'T TOUCH THIS BY 14
FREEBALLERS VS LEGENDS (+8) -- FREEBALLERS BY 3
FREEBALLERS VS FRODO SWAGGINS (+3) -- FRODO SWAGGINS BY 1

D2
BULLET CLUB VS THE SYSTEM (+1) -- THE SYSTEM BY 2
BULLET CLUB VS D-GENERATION X Y AND Z (+6) -- BULLET CLUB BY 3
BQI VS LET'S GET RECCKED (+11) -- BQI BY 15

D3
MIKE'S DETAILING VS BUFFALO VICE (+5) -- BUFFALO VICE BY 2
PRACTICE SQUAD VS CUNNING STUNTS (+2) -- PRACTICE SQUAD BY 4
GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+10) -- GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE BY 6
COBBLESTONE VS CUNNING STUNTS (+1) -- CUNNING STUNTS BY 3

D4
COOCHIE MONSTERS VS BALLS DEEP (+7) -- COOCHIE MONSTERS BY 8
SKELETON CREW VS I'D RATHER BE GOLFING (+1) -- I'D RATHER BE GOLFING BY 2
GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS TWO TUDDIES (+6) -- GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS BY 8
NOT SO STICKY VS POWERPUFF GIRLS (+6) -- POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 1
BLUE BALLERS VS FLYING BALLS (+7) -- BLUE BALLERS BY 10

D5
716ERS VS PIT HARADE (+12) -- 716ERS BY 7
TMA VS WET BANDITS (+14) -- TMA BY 17
VICTORIOUS SECRET VS WET BANDITS (+15) -- VICTORIOUS SECRET BY 20
COME FROM BEHIND VS ROOM 40 (+10) -- COME FROM BEHIND BY 6

D6
SBG VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+1) -- BLITZED AND CONFUSED BY 3
BENGAY BANDITS VS CAT-TASTROPHE (+1) -- CAT-TASTROPHE BY 2
SELECT VS STICKY LACES (+8) -- SELECT BY 4

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

• Can't Touch This is 0-2 but scored 86 points in two one-possession losses. Is this the week the standings finally start telling the truth about them, or does the brutal D1 schedule keep punishing them? The schedule won’t punish them this week, as they get this current version of The Malones. They should win this game, and the TSL should take notice that they’re for real. 

• The Blue Ballers lost for the first time in what feels like forever. Was the Coochie Monsters upset a fluke, or is the back-to-back-to-back dream actually in trouble? Can it be neither? Because it’s neither. The Coochie Monsters are very good, and they’re going to be in the title hunt until the very end. They’ll be playing on Halloween. But so will the Blue Ballers. I think we may have just had a Championship preview in D4. 

• The Bengay Bandits went from a 39-point win to a 48-point shutout loss in a week. Which version is the real team? Somewhere in the middle, leaning towards the former. (That means the first one.) You don’t just waltz through a team without being slightly good at football, and I wonder if Select just presents a very bad matchup for a new team?

• The Raw Milkers took sole possession of first in D6. Is this finally the breakout season everyone's been waiting on? It sure feels like it, right? The Raw Milkers have been a middle of the road team that’s pulled off some upsets for their entire existence, they just haven’t been able to keep it up over a full season. It seems like they’re about to. Finally. 

• Which currently undefeated team will be the LAST to lose? With every division seeming so close, I think the answer I’m going with is Grey Hair - Don’t Care in D3. They just feel like they have the best chance to do it. I do, however, feel like no team will go undefeated this season. 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY 

• You might see a little bit of rain later in the day, but it’s still looking like a nice, 80 degree football weather day. Enjoy it while it lasts. 

• Breakfast Club Predictions: 

• D’s Nutz 40, Missydemeanor 30

• Megoonsta’s 27, Meagan It Happen 24

• Carly-fornia Dreaming 30, Steph Infection 29

• GAMES OF THE DAY:

• 10:00 - Eyes Downtown vs Sticky Bandits

• 11:00 - Great Value Tater Thots vs Two Tuddies

• 12:00 - Bullet Club vs The System

• 1:00 - Cunning Stunts vs Practice Squad

• 2:00 - Blue Ballers vs Flying Balls

• 3:00 - BQI vs Let’s Get Reccked

• Frodo Swaggins had a great starting week last weekend, even without getting a win. They hung with two very good teams and had a chance to beat them both. They’re only going to get better. 

• DXYZ is getting forgotten in D2 and they shouldn’t be. 

• I heard there was an incident with a TSLer last weekend, and it was good to hear how many of our league members sprung to action to help their peer out in a time of need. There’s a reason why the TSL is the best. 

• If you’re reading this article, you’re on the TSL website. From there you can find multiple other articles and the weekly TSL podcast! Jeff has entertainment for you every single day of the week! Way better than Topper. 

• If you’d like to be on the podcast, just reach out to Jeff Krol, Joe K, Dorene, Tino, or someone that looks like they’re important and they’ll get you on to talk about your team! 

• If you have anything you’d like to say to me about your team that you think I have wrong or I’m an idiot for what I say, OR that you have a teammate who deserves a proper shoutout, email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. today! 

• Can someone please make sure Garrett doesn’t lock himself in his garage again this week? He has a dart tournament to run at 4:00. Blind Draw. Be there. 

-GF OUT

WEEK 1 THOUGHTS, PREDICTIONS, PICKS, AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 28 August 2026 23:23

Published: Friday, 28 August 2026 23:23

Written by Topper

Hits: 455

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, after two months of heat, family vacations, weddings, beach days, playing in other football summer leagues that cause you to remember just how much you miss the TSL, having babies, patio beers, sundress seasons, humidity, home improvement projects you finished, home improvement products you got sick of midway through completing them and may never fully finish for years if ever, seeing people you kind of know in public but darting your eyes away from them so you don’t actually have to say hello to them, and other assorted summer fun: THE TSL HAS RETURNED!

Yes, on Saturday, August 29th in the Year of Our Lord 2026, 51 TSL Franchises across 7 divisions will descend upon the Leonard T. Alba III Fields at The Rose Garden at The Angry Buffalo in an effort to once again chase the single most important thing in your lives: Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality. 

That’s right! The Race for Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality begins for the Fall 2026 season in less than 24 hours (depending on when you read this). While the summer brought us a ton of fun and good times, it’s time to get back to work. So what’s changed in the league for this season? What good storylines should the league be paying extra attention to? 

• D2/D3 HOUSEKEEPING!

Okay, not really. Yes, you can go to the standings page and you will clearly see a “D2” with 6 teams smiling right back at you. A closer look at those teams will tell you that only ONE of those teams (DXYZ) was in D2 last season. So what happened? Buffalo Vice was allowed to go back down to D3, since they only jumped up to D2 last season really to help out the league. Frodo Swaggins won D2 and did the honorable thing and moved up to D1. Can’t Touch This finally said “screw it” and ALSO went up to D1 (shout out to them!). And lastly, the Jabronies went back into TSL hibernation (they’ve disappeared and reappeared numerous times over the years, I can’t really say they folded). This was simmering for quite some time. The TSL is cyclical, and over time the league gets to a point where it needs to be “restructured” a little bit. That can be due to many things like teams going away completely, teams breaking up where half go one way, half go the other, things like that. There have been times where we’ve done a year without a D6, and the last time we had this happen in the D2-D3 range, Topper made a “Super Division” that had mixed together the D2/D3/Some Good D4 teams and they all played each other. It worked out in the end. What Jeff has done was take the remaining D2 team in DXYZ and the D3 champion in BQI (who were moving up anyway) and then he “called up” other top D3 teams. “The System” is an ISH and Jabronies hybrid. Let’s Get Reccked is an LGR and What a Dump hybrid. Bullet Club has picked up some Mavericks. And PWI returns with some of the same old names we remember, but there’s some other former top names on those rosters too. Change is supposed to be a good thing, and the “new” D2 is just D3 on steroids. 

• BREAKFAST CLUB IS BACK!

Maybe this sounds like a confusing scenario to some of you, but in the olden days, Breakfast Club was only played in the Spring. Fall Topper didn’t like to do as much work as Spring “I forgot how much I hate doing extra stuff we aren’t doing this in the fall” Topper did. And then Covid happened and as a way to have more football in our lives we started running a Fall BC for a few years, until last year when Jeff decided it was too much of a pain for him (with all of his life stuff going on) to make it work. Instead, a group of TSLers banded together and worked their tails off to run Breakfast Club for Jeff instead. And lo and behold, they got enough people together and Fall BC is back again. It just goes to show you how much people care about the TSL and what it means to them that they would dedicate their free time to make the TSL a better, more fun place. 

• D6 GIVES US SOME NEW TEAMS! 

D6 was a little bit light on teams last season (considering we had 12 two seasons ago), but now it’s full of life. TMA moved up to D5 after winning it all, and Intentional Clowning isn’t around anymore. For a minute, that left only 4 teams (Irish Giants, Select, the Milkers, and Sticky Laces) left to battle it out. But then Blitzed and Confused, Cat-Tastrophe, and the Bengay Bandits all appeared! Add in SBG doing the league a solid and agreeing to move to D6 (they wanted to stay in D5!), and you’ve got yourself a wide open division. 

• THE WANDERERS ARE DEAD (FOR NOW?). 

For reasons that are still unclear to me, there has been something going on internally with the Wanderers for a bit I guess, and at some point this summer, they decided to cut ties with long time future Social Co-Ed Touch Football Hall of Fame QB Frank and rebrand themselves to the “Skeleton Crew” while dropping down to D4. It appears that after decades of Sal saying he’d do a better job, he’s going to get his chance? Whatever the case may be, if this really is the end, the Wanderers deserve the acknowledgement of what they accomplished over the (many) years of playing winning, fun, championship football. Tip of the cap to them!

As it is with ANY TSL season, there are a lot more story lines and other nuances to things that really make the TSL the TSL. It will be a whole lot of fun to see how things unfold and shake out over the next few months. What’s that? You don’t want to wait to see how things work out and just find out the future champs now? Then you’ve come to the right place. 

D1

D1 just keeps getting better and better. After taking the title in the Spring, the rich got richer as Bobby used all of his tricks to sign free agent and arguably the best player in the league right now Charles Emdin from the Jabronies (word is that Bridget may have helped in recruitment here too) in the TSL’s own version of the “Kevin Durant signs with the Warriors” move. Adding him to a championship team that already has players on it like the criminally underrated Nick Voss just seems unfair. It feels like something the Legends would do. Speaking of the Legends, they’re back again, and historically they’re at their best when they don’t win the title the previous season. The rest of D1 is chock full of talent: The Malones and Sticky Bandits remain largely the same and they’ll play into the title chase, but you really can’t count out Frodo Swaggins (fresh off a D2 title winning season) or Can’t Touch This (fresh off another non D2 title season) either. And then of course, you have the Freeballers. We’ll see. 

PREDICTION: Eyes Downtown is too stacked. Look for them to repeat with a win over The Malones in the title game. 

STICKY BANDITS VS CAN'T TOUCH THIS (+2) - The best part about Can’t Touch This moving up to D1 is that we’ll get all of these really cool matchups. They start off the D1 run against the Sticky Bandits, who consistently have their eyes on the D1 title. It’s a good measuring stick game for CTT. STICKY BANDITS BY 4

THE MALONES VS FREEBALLERS (+5) - The Malones feel like they just keep getting better each season, and if that holds true again this season, it really could be “the year” for them. Rumors about a potential QB Andy injury are growing louder as the season gets closer to starting, which could derail the progress. The Freeballers made progress themselves last year, but now that’s into overdrive if newcomer Jurrien Mitchell is as good as advertised. Give me the team without QB questions. FREEBALLERS BY 7

EYES DOWNTOWN VS LEGENDS (+2) - Nothing wrong with starting D1 off with a few suspensions, right? A big time matchup right out of the gate. How good can the champs be this season? How good can the Legends be this season? Are they toast? Historically when I pick against the Legends they prove me wrong. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 11

D2

A brand new D2 from top to bottom (well, and DXYZ) makes for a very interesting season to be had. BQI recruited new people to their roster for the third straight season to keep improving. The System is a killer mesh of players where most have played together in some way for quite some time. PWI has talent all over the place and if they click early on, look out. Bullet Club added some Mavericks who should have good rapport with Jordan at QB. DXYZ is made up of some of the best and smartest football minds (and Travis too) around. LGR basically walked into the What A Dump store and stole most of the best pieces. If they can gel quickly, this division looks to be the most exciting. 

PREDICTION: BQI wins a second straight title, pulling out a win over LGR in the title game. 

BQI VS BULLET CLUB (+5) - Both teams have a bit of a chip on their shoulders going into this one, which always means we’ll get a good game. Bridget 3X has to be excited to throw to her new toys, while Bullet Club shouldn’t have any early season issues this time around since they’re not breaking in a new QB. The champs start things off right. BQI BY 11

PWI VS LET'S GET RECCKED (+7) - Even though PWI is the “new” team since they took a few seasons off, it almost feels like they have more synchronicity than LGR does. It might take a week or two for LGR to really get going. PWI BY 8

THE SYSTEM VS D-GENERATION X Y AND Z (+10) - The Keller Clan is back again and their reward for hanging out in D2 still is getting to play “The System”. I’m not sure exactly how good The System will be right off the bat, but one has to assume there would be SOME growing pains…right? D-GENERATION X Y AND Z BY 1

BQI VS PWI (+2) - The second game for both of these teams this week, but it could be the best one of the day. PWI has the girls to keep pace with the BQI bonus points for Bridget thrown TDs. But Buddy and crew have a decent idea on how to slow her down, which means things could be quite exciting. PWI BY 7

D3

D3, once a pillar of consistency in the TSL with minimal team movement, feels a lot like the TSL’s version of the PAC-12 after realignment started in college football. Gone are the long-time D3 members such as the Wanderers, Bullet Club, LGR, and the Kellers. Now D3 finds itself with two of its better teams from last year: Grey Hair - Don’t Care (who also added Nick Voss back into the fold) and the always dangerous Cunning Stunts. Practice Squad is another team you can never sleep on, B will be the first to tell you that himself. Buffalo Vice returns back into the division after a quick season vacationing in D2, and then we have the very interesting Mike’s Detailing making the jump up to D3, and the even more interesting D3 return of Darryl Carr QB Superstar and Cobblestone! D3 might be different, but it’s still going to be lots of fun. 

PREDICTION: Grey Hair - Don’t Care takes the championship with a win over the Cunning Stunts, dont @ me. 

GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS CUNNING STUNTS (+1) - Well, here's the “Championship Preview” right out of the gate! Both of these teams made it to Championship Saturday last season, and both of them lost close games in the semi-finals. Now they find themselves as “leaders of the pack”, being the hunted instead of the hunters/huntresses? Smart QBs, talented players? This team has everything you could want in a Week 1 matchup. GREY HAIR - DON’T CARE BY 3

BUFFALO VICE VS COBBLESTONE (+5) - After their not so great time in D2, playing Cobblestone is going to feel like someone turned the difficulty down way too much. Maybe. Darryl’s mystery roster apparently has some big time ball players on it. While I truly wish that to be the case, I have to sort of believe it when I see it here. BUFFALO VICE BY 10

GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS MIKE'S DETAILING (+6) - MD’s first game in D3 gives them a fun matchup with GHDC on the back end of a double header. They’re a really good team who seems to be thwarted in the playoffs with untimely “oh crap our QB can’t be here this week”-itis, and they seemed destined to move up to D3 at some point anyway. This is a great measuring stick game for them. GREY HAIR - DON’T CARE BY 7

D4

D4 is a mixture of good teams from top to bottom. Any team here can win the title and I wouldn’t be surprised. you have the Blue Ballers coming into D4 fresh off back to back titles as they try to go for the back to back to back feat. We haven’t seen that in a minute in the TSL. I’d rather be golfing is the former Call The Doctor, which is the Dave Eickhoff B team. You know that they’re gonna put up a good fight. The Coochie Monsters came up short in their quest for immortality, and word is that they might be switching quarterbacks for this season, which means maybe we shouldn’t expect as much out of them. Not So Sticky returns the usual crew. The Powerpuff Girls are always a tough out and I know they’ll be beginning to get some of their old players back soon. Balls Deep are the defending D4 champions after a magical playoff run in the Spring session, they didn’t have the best season last year so they stayed down to keep improving instead of going up before they’re ready. I respect it. The Great Value Tater Thots are the Tots, but most importantly, they’re actually playing in the Fall Session! That’s a win for the league (and the bar!). The Flying Balls added some players, getting old D1 QB Matt Glowacki to help them out. Then you have the Skeleton Crew, which are the Wanderers without Frank. Last up are the Two Tuddies. They did not have the world‘s greatest season last season in D3 and they knew it. They either did too much too soon and they weren’t quite ready for it or perhaps D4 might just be where they’re supposed to be. It'll be interesting to see how they do this year. I believe in the Tud Buds. You should too.

PREDICTION: Flying Balls rediscover their old magic, upsetting the Blue Ballers in the D4 Finals. 

BLUE BALLERS VS BALLS DEEP (+10) - Here’s a marquee matchup if I’ve ever seen one! Week 1 and we get the reigning D4 champions taking on the reigning D5 champions that moved up. We’ll see right away just how the Blue Ballers measure up. With the way they scored last season, I’m pretty sure they’re gonna be okay. Balls Deep are going to have their hands full right away here. BLUE BALLERS BY 4

I'D RATHER BE GOLFING VS POWERPUFF GIRLS (+2) - I’m not entirely sure which version of the Powerpuff Girls we’re going to see this season, but if they got some of their original ladies back, then they’re gonna be more dangerous than they were last season. I’d Rather Be Golfing had a pretty good season themselves last season, although metrics show that maybe they outkicked their coverage a little bit. Another season of experience with a good quarterback at the helm can only be a good thing. I believe they will give the PPG a good game but…POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 2

FLYING BALLS VS SKELETON CREW (+1) - To say that last season didn’t go the Flying Balls way would be an understatement. It wasn’t the best of times for the former D6 champions who jumped up two divisions. They just had trouble finding their way on offense while their defense was still pretty good, but they didn’t quite figure out the nuances of D4. They did retool a bit in the off-season so the talent is there and it’ll be interesting to see what year two and D4 brings. They get to play the Skeleton Crew, which nobody is fully sure how things are going to go here, but it’s sure going to be fun to watch. FLYING BALLS BY 3

I'D RATHER BE GOLFING VS NOT SO STICKY (+2) - Golfing gets a double header week one, and after a tough Powerpuff team, they get to play Not So Sticky? Not so fun. NSS remains one of the smartest teams around, and they’ll be hard to knock off. NOT SO STICKY BY 8

POWERPUFF GIRLS VS GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS (+3) - The Tots return and they get to play the PPG, which is never a fun task when you’re just getting back into the groove of things. Luckily, they’re getting them on the backend of a doubleheader (and most likely the girls have played another game or two somewhere), which can only work to the Thots’ advantage. GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS BY 4

D5

D5 is in an interesting spot. Blitzkrieg dominated the division last season, but as TSL vets know, Fall Blitzkrieg is a different animal. TMA jumps up from D6 and they’re already a D5 title favorite right away. Victorious Secret is a brand new old gender team (they played a few seasons ago) with Jordan Lawson at QB. CFB is here for the 4,249th straight TSL season. Pit Harade started putting things together at the end of last season, and adding Garrett Beesing to the roster can only help that. The 716ers had a very good first season that they’re looking to improve on, same with the Wet Bandits, who got better as the season went on. Room 40 is a refurbished Mo’ Chicken, so we’ll see if the changes work out for them. 

PREDICTION: Fall Blitzkrieg gets the job done over Victorious Secret. 

COME FROM BEHIND VS WET BANDITS (+4) - With the whispers flying around that CFB is dealing with some injuries already, it’s a perfect time for the Wet Bandits to strike. However, CFB has learned how to play in these situations and come out clean on the other side, while the Bandits are still learning. COME FROM BEHIND BY 8

TMA VS ROOM 40 (+10) - TMA is welcomed back to D5 with a battle against Room 40, who struggled a bit last season. If they had to pick who to start against, this would probably be it. TMA BY 14

VICTORIOUS SECRET VS PIT HARADE (+3) - The two pink teams battle Week 1. VS played well in the wine tournament I was told, so they’re not completely brand new to playing together, which is a huge bonus. Jordan put together a pretty good roster of ladies. PH found themselves losing some games they should’ve won last season, and the guys on the team let down QB Jeff and the girls more often than not. That changes with Garrett on the team, and one has to think Q is going to bounce back from a down year. They get a tough draw to start. VICTORIOUS SECRET BY 9

BLITZKRIEG VS 716ERS (+9) - If the 716ers were hoping to knock some rust off Week 1, they weren’t given any favors by the TSL Scheduling Bot. Blitzkrieg presents the toughest challenge they could get, but at least they’ll get them off the schedule right away. BLITZKRIEG BY 15

D6

These D6s are the best D6s. They’re the ones that have a great mix of veteran teams, teams that are just on the cusp of making a leap, and brand new team energy all over the place. I don’t know what to expect from BnC, Bengay, and the Trophes (calling them the ‘trophies’ over the Cats just makes sense), but it’ll be fun to see what happens. SBG is basically a brand new team since we didn’t really get to see what they were about very much last season. And then we have our returning teams in the Giants, Laces, Select, and the Milkers. All of them continue to improve, and all of them pose a threat to win the title. D6 is going to be fun. 

PREDICTION: The Raw Milkers beat the Irish Giants to win the D6 title.

 IRISH GIANTS VS SELECT (+6) - Here we find the Irish Giants looking to prove why they’re the preseason title favorites, taking on a Select team that sure can play defense, but sometimes the offense still struggles. Another season of putting it together could really have them in the mix at season’s end. IRISH GIANTS BY 8

BLITZED AND CONFUSED VS BENGAY BANDITS (+1) - New team takes on other new team. I flipped a coin. BLITZED AND CONFUSED BY 2

STICKY LACES VS CAT-TASTROPHE (+4) - Veteran team takes on brand new team. STICKY LACES BY 16

TSC VS THE GODFATHER 

THE TSC PICKS: 

DIVISION 1
STICKY BANDITS VS CAN'T TOUCH THIS (+2) ----- CAN'T TOUCH THIS BY 3
THE MALONES VS FREEBALLERS (+5) ----- THE MALONES BY 7
EYES DOWNTOWN VS LEGENDS (+2) ----- LEGENDS BY 3

DIVISION 2
BQI VS BULLET CLUB (+5) ----- BQI BY 3
PWI VS LET'S GET RECCKED (+7) ----- LET'S GET RECCKED BY 1
THE SYSTEM VS D-GENERATION X Y AND Z (+10) ----- THE SYSTEM BY 4
BQI VS PWI (+2) ----- PWI BY 1

DIVISION 3
GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS CUNNING STUNTS (+1) ---- GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE BY 1
BUFFALO VICE VS COBBLESTONE (+5) ----- BUFFALO VICE BY 7
GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS MIKE'S DETAILING (+6) ---- GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE BY 2

DIVISION 4
BLUE BALLERS VS BALLS DEEP (+10) ----- BLUE BALLERS BY 6
I'D RATHER BE GOLFING VS POWERPUFF GIRLS (+2) ----- I'D RATHER BE GOLFING BY 3
FLYING BALLS VS SKELETON CREW (+1) ----- FLYING BALLS BY 5
I'D RATHER BE GOLFING VS NOT SO STICKY (+2) ----- NOT SO STICKY BY 2
POWERPUFF GIRLS VS GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS (+3) ----- GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS BY 1

DIVISION 5
COME FROM BEHIND VS WET BANDITS (+4) ----- COME FROM BEHIND BY 1
TMA VS ROOM 40 (+10) ----- TMA BY 6
VICTORIOUS SECRET VS PIT HARADE (+3) ----- VICTORIOUS SECRET BY 1
BLITZKRIEG VS 716ERS (+9) ----- BLITZKRIEG BY 4

DIVISION 6
IRISH GIANTS VS SELECT (+6) ----- IRISH GIANTS BY 8
BLITZED AND CONFUSED VS BENGAY BANDITS (+1) ----- BLITZED AND CONFUSED BY 1
STICKY LACES VS CAT-TASTROPHE (+4) ----- STICKY LACES BY 6

RECORDS: 

The Godfather: 0-0

The TSC: 0-0

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

• Eyes Downtown are the defending D1 champs and the preseason favorite again — who's your pick to be the team that finally knocks them off the throne? It’s going to be difficult to pick against the defending champs, but if anyone can do it, my pick would be the Legends, who are somehow underdogs for the first time in forever. 

• D2 is stacked at the top with The System, BQI, and PWI all in the mix — which of the three is your early sleeper to run away with it? PWI is a very good team but they haven’t played together enough yet. The System is a very good team, but there’s something about them that just feels off. Both teams are very capable to win the entire thing, but if I have to choose a team to “run away” with the division, it would have to be BQI. They have the points advantage and added a stud in Charles Emdin. Good luck D2. 

• Grey Hair leads a wide-open D3 — is this the year they get over the hump, or does somebody in that jumbled middle steal it? If Grey Hair can survive the challenge from the Cunning Stunts, I don’t see much of a reason that they shouldn’t win D3.

• D4 is ten teams deep and the closest division in the league — outside the favorites, who's your dark horse to crash the top of the standings? I already picked the Flying Balls to win it all, so while I feel like they’d be my answer, I’ll choose another. I think everyone has forgotten just how good the Two Tuddies were before they had a bad season where everything went wrong last spring. Don’t count them out. 

• Three brand-new teams (Blitzed and Confused, Bengay Bandits, Cat-Tastrophe) just dropped into D6 — which newcomer do you think shocks people right out of the gate? I’m going to go with Blitzed and Confused simply because I looked at all of these teams’ rosters and they had the most names that I recognized. 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

• It’s just good to be back writing this article about the league I so enjoy even if I’m unable to play it anymore. So if it feels that good to me here in Des Moines, I can only imagine the excitement there in Buffalo. 

• My Weather Channel app tells me that we’re all but guaranteed to have a much better Week 1 than we had last season (where we got rained out completely): 79 degrees and mostly sunny. Perfect football weather!

• Games of the Day: 

• 10:00 - Can’t Touch This vs Sticky Bandits

• 11:00 - Bullet Club vs BQI

• 12:00 - Let’s Get Reccked vs PWI

• 1:00 - Flying Balls vs Skeleton Crew

• 2:00 - Cunning Stunts vs Grey Hair Don’t Care

• 3:00 - Eyes Downtown vs Legends 

• REMEMBER: IF YOU ARE A BRAND NEW PLAYER AND DIDN’T PLAY LAST SEASON, YOU NEED TO SIGN THE WAIVER HERE: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1NqaQgYi1a2Sr-vlV_Nab-G7gIJhM3fE0O_xWzK0s5P0/edit

• Look! The Bar is going to have weekly specials for the league: 

• Please remember that while you’re busy shaking the rust off, so too are the referees. They’re going to miss calls and not see what you’re seeing out there. DON’T lose your mind out there on them! 

• Remember, as a league wide commitment to keeping the fields on time because we’re going to be down to 4 this season: BE TEN MINUTES EARLY TO YOUR GAMES. The league is not going to hold up everyone else an extra 5-10 minutes because your second girl decided to leave for a 12:00 game at 11:57. 

• I can’t help but to think that there was a missed opportunity with the division realignment. Instead of just doing a D2 and D3 with 6 teams each, perhaps we made them 8 and 8 and called up a few more teams? 

• I’m super excited to see how well these new teams are going to fare. Whether they’re brand spankin’ new, merged teams, or bringing teams back from the dead, they all have a lot of intrigue surrounding them. 

• Jeff Krol works tirelessly to make your dreams of Immortality a reality. Between juggling an amazing wife, two kids, and his own “real life” career, he shouldn’t have any free time at all. Yet he still finds a way to carve out more time to take care of the approximate 40 billion things that it takes to run the best Social Co-Ed Touch Football league on the planet. When you see him tomorrow, buy him a beer. Thank you Jeff. You’re more appreciated than you know. 

Now go out there and achieve your dreams. 

-GF OUT